Three Hundred Words (2 page)

He was loving
every minute of having me at his disposal; having me on my knees in front of
him, to be used however he wanted.

I was perfectly
content to be here.

I’d never really
known what kind of sex I’d actually enjoy the most, but this was definitely the
kind I fanaticised about and so far, it was doing wicked things to me. My body
ached with need and heart beat so fast I was sure Mr. Lane could hear it.

I worked my mouth
over his large cock, straining to fit him all in. My hand stayed put, keeping
in time with the rhythm of my head-bobbing. I kept watching his face and he
watched me back, face intense and occasionally broken by a gasp or groan.

After a few
minutes of my own efforts, Mr. Lane took control. Removing my hand from his
cock, he weaved fingers through my curly brown hair and pushed my mouth further
down.

I couldn’t quite
take him all, but Mr. Lane made sure I came as close as possible. He urged me
forwards until my eyes watered and I was having to push back the urge to gag.
Still, I kept my eyes on him and worked my tongue against his shaft.

He bobbed my head
up and down, pushing himself deep before giving me a break and barely moving me
against his tip.

We both stopped
when there was a knock at the door. I was so far down his cock that my nose
touched his pelvic triangle and the need to gag was strong, but I was forced to
stay there until the knocking stopped and footsteps were heard going back down
the corridor.

I’d met Mr. Lane’s
eyes and his had sparkled with almost amusement. The fear of getting caught
skyrocketed my desire even more.

I wasn’t surprised
when I felt hot liquid at the back of my throat only moments later.

I swallowed, not
having known what to expect from the taste, but deciding it wasn’t altogether
unpleasant, and leant my head back against the wall.

Mr. Lane had cum
and he wouldn’t be able to get a hard on again for at least a few minutes. My
entrance was still demanding attention, but I realised that Mr. Lane wasn’t
intending on giving it to me.

He’d already done
his trousers back up and straightened out his clothes. He didn’t look like he’d
done anything more than just teach a lesson. “Those three hundred words are
yours,” he said in a stilly raspy voice, offering me his hand to stand up.

I took it, unsure
of whether to ask him for more or not. Part of me didn’t want to give away how
ravenously hungry I was to have him and the other part needed to beg him to
pleasure me. I kept my mouth sealed shut.

That was
definitely one way to make sure I came back for more.

***

I walked up my
drive with slumped shoulders. I’d missed the school bus due to my unfulfilling
rendezvous and so the walk home had given me plenty of time to regret my
decision and let the self-loathing really take hold.

I’d cheated on my
boyfriend for an A.

I’d slept with my
teacher because I had a crush on him and my boyfriend didn’t satisfy me
sexually.

It was all a bit
too much for me to contend with right now. I needed to decide what on Earth I
was going to do about Luke and whether I could bring myself to continue
sleeping with Mr. Lane.

I should stay away
from both of them.

Unfortunately, I
spied Luke’s shoes in the hallway the moment I entered and knew I wasn’t going
to get a chance to think about anything.

I attempted to
swallow down my guilt and keep a straight face. No one had to know about my
discretions quite yet. I still hadn’t wrapped my head around what I’d done
myself, yet. That and I was still overcome with a desire that hadn’t been
sated.

What I really
needed was to masturbate so that I could think with a clear head.

My imagination was
running wild with the possibilities for mine and Mr. Lane’s encounter and I
needed to stop them dead before I decided what to do about everything.

Mine and Luke’s
relationship was failing, really, as proven by my reckless decision today. He
might not know it, but I needed more than someone who had the perfect
personality. There was the physical side, too, and I was beginning to realise
just how important that actually was.

I managed a
relatively normal smile as I gave my mum a hug. “Sorry about the time, missed
the school bus because I was chatting to Emma.”

She rolled her
eyes. “No surprises there.” This wasn’t an uncommon occurrence, but there was
no reason my mum should know about my poor grade. “Luke’s upstairs. He only got
here about five minutes ago.”

His swimming
practise must have been cut short again. They’d been doing that a lot recently
due to the dwindling numbers. Luke wasn’t happy about it at all, so he wasn’t
likely to be in the best mood tonight.

I supposed we
could wallow together. I’d tell him about my poor grade and it would give me an
excuse to be in a horrible mood all evening.

Maybe he’d even
leave early and I’d get the time alone I needed.

I slung my
rucksack into my desk chair and greeted Luke. “You’re here early.” I hadn’t
expected him round at all tonight, but he didn’t often let me know before he
popped in. “Early finish again?”

“No, early start,
actually. For once no one had to stay behind and we could start right off the
bat. It was a good session. New personal best.” He opened his arms in an invite
to cuddle.

I took it
reluctantly, glad this position meant he couldn’t see my face. I let my grimace
reign once I’d gotten comfy. “I failed my English coursework.” May as well get
it out there.

Luke’s hold
tightened on me. “Really? How badly?”

“Too badly. Mr.
Lane’s given me an extension, thankfully.”

“Huh, I didn’t
think he would have done. You’re always going on about how strict he is.” I was
sure I didn’t talk about Mr. Lane that often. I normally made a conscious
effort to avoid talking about him. “Well, that was nice of him, anyway.”

“Yeah, I must have
looked really pathetic.”

“You didn’t cry,
did you? It sounds weird, but you always look kind of cute when you cry. It
might have swayed him.”

I didn’t chuckle,
even if the corner of my lips lifted up. Sitting here and joking with Luke
wasn’t right. I should just tell him what I’d done and get it over with.

But then Mr. Lane
would be fired. I at least needed to wait a few days so it didn’t look
suspicious, first. “I didn’t cry, thankfully. That would have been too
embarrassing to live down.”

Luke chuckled and
rubbed his hand up and down my arm. I suddenly wondered if my breath might
smell like cum. I’d go to the toilet and clean my teeth in a moment, just to be
certain. “Nothing is ever as embarrassing as you seem to think it’s going to
be.”

It was true that I
was a bit of a worrier when it came to showing myself up. Half the time I
avoided saying anything in case it might be wrong. “Well, hopefully I’ll manage
a better piece of work this time around, anyway.”

“I’m sure you
will. Badminton has taken up a lot of time recently, anyway.” I hadn’t really
noticed that – I’d been going to more practises, but I enjoyed it so much that
it wasn’t stressing me out. Maybe it really had dug into my coursework time so
much that I’d produced a poor piece of work because of it.

“Yeah, I guess it
has.”

Luke, who’d paused
the DVD he was watching, pressed play again. I said I needed the toilet and
escaped my bedroom with a long face. Our conversation had been completely
normal – there’d been no inclination I’d swallowed someone else’s load less
than an hour ago. I cleaned my teeth thoroughly and checked every inch of my
body in the process, looking for any marks that would give away my clandestine
activities.

I had to make sure
there was no way Luke would suspect Mr. Lane before I broke up with him.

Half an hour down
the line, we’d been watching the DVD and my mind had been allowed to wander. My
hands had slipped lower before I realised what I was doing, but I stopped them,
trying to bury the desire that was rearing its ugly head.

Even attempting to
sleep with Luke after what I’d just done was abominable.

But then, maybe
having a discussion with him about his complete lack of sex drive was
necessary. Maybe it was me who wasn’t doing something that he needed me to.

There was only one
way to find out and I hoped my conscience could bear it.

I ran my fingers
under his shirt to caress the hard muscles of his stomach. Luke was fit. He
worked out regularly and being on the swim team meant he had a lean body, which
was just what I loved.

Mr. Lane had the
same physique, too.

Luke probably knew
what I was hinting at the moment I began caressing his torso, but he held out
with no reaction. It wasn’t until I moved to reach up and kiss his mouth that
he began to get clearly uncomfortable. He gave me a quick peck, before moving
his hand away. “Not tonight, I’m all tired from practise.”

I didn’t sigh,
even though I wanted to, and resumed my previous position instead. “Is there
something I do wrong?” There was a chance that he really did just have a low
sex drive, or that he was gay, I supposed. But chances were I was just doing
something wrong.

“No, of course
not,” Luke replied immediately, letting out his own sigh. “You don’t do
anything wrong at all. I’m really just… not in the mood right now. Or a lot of
the time.”

It wasn’t that
that was a problem for him as a person, it just didn’t work for me in our
relationship. I seemed far too young to be going to some kind of sex counsellor
and besides, I’d already cheated on him now. It was far too late for that.
“Okay, I just wanted to make sure.”

“I know it’s
frustrating for you.”

I shrugged weakly.
I’d been such a dick that I couldn’t afford to make him feel bad about anything
now. If I told him I cheated, he’d know it was because of this and I felt like
I was telling him the fact he didn’t have a high sex drive meant there was
something wrong with him – it just wasn’t right for
me
. “It’s not so
bad. My fingers are pretty good,” I teased, really just wanting him to leave at
this point.

I wanted to spend
as little time with him as possible until I felt it had been long enough since
I’d told him about Mr. Lane’s extension for there not to be any suspicion.

Because I really
liked Luke. He was perfect for me in every way but the sex. I’d admired him
from afar for years, always being the introvert who sat in the corner and
avoided talking to people who weren’t Emma.

The day Luke had
come and asked me out I’d almost said no because I thought he was joking. We’d
never even really had a conversation before.

And it had turned
out we got along great. Better than great. I really liked him.

I snuggled back
into his chest and let the guilt flow through me. I was a bitch and I didn’t
deserve him.

I’d cheated on him
almost without a second thought and it was almost enough to make me swear off
relationships for good.

I probably didn’t
deserve anyone.

Chapter Two

“So this is the
plan for my eighteenth,” Emma laid out a poorly drawn map on her bed. “We start
at Myers, get in the trebles until we’re completely wasted, then head down to
Beach. They always have cheesy music that we can dance to in there and the
drinks are so expensive it’ll give everyone a chance to recover and no one will
go throwing up on me.”

I nodded. It was
the route we always went when going round town – Emma had done it so many times
with her fake ID I was surprised this is what she’d chosen for her big night.

“And then, to The
Club Room for the big finale. They’ll have all the sexy grinding tracks in
there and maybe I’ll
finally
get lucky for a change.”

This was the only
change to the regulars. The Club Room was all expensive and fancy and didn’t
normally appeal to any of us when we were just chilling for the night. It was
perfectly suited to an eighteenth birthday party.

“Sounds good. Who
have you invited?” Emma and I had always kept to ourselves within school, but
she had plenty of friends and cousins outside from all the clubs she went to.
The gymnastics and dance group she was a part of were incredibly tight knit.

For some reason,
I’d managed to slot in when we went out drinking perfectly fine. I was much
more fun when I’d had a few beers and my inhibitions were faded away.

“Everyone from
Kickers who’s old enough to come and then a couple of my cousins. Liam is of
course invited.” I’d always fancied Emma’s cousin from afar and she knew it.

I rolled my eyes.
“Of course he is.” She loved to almost out me at every opportunity she got.

Part of me
wondered if I’d even have eyes from him now I was so consumed with Mr. Lane. I
hadn’t even seen Liam for over six months. “And, well, I was actually planning
on taking something for the night.”

My eyebrows shot
up. Emma had always been interested in drugs. She’d researched them all, read
as many trip reports as she could get her eyes on, and had been scared away by
their illegality for all this time, too. “What changed your mind?”

“Well, someone I
know from ballet said they’ve got their hands on some if I wanted to try it.
It’s the good stuff, we did one of those chemical tests on it. It’s MDMA.”

“That’s the
ecstasy one, right?”

“That’s it.”

I pondered this.
I’d always be sceptical of drugs and doubted I’d ever try them. I didn’t have
any interest like Emma did. Alcohol loosened me up enough to not be painfully
shy, but the thought of being out of control definitely didn’t do anything for
me.

I worried about
Emma doing them, too. I’d always thought she’d stick with her alcohol and that
would be enough; that the worry of someone finding out she’d done drugs was
enough for a demotivation.

Apparently not.

“Did you want to
do some, too? I reserved you some, if you did. I’m guessing not, though.”

I waved her off.
“I’m really not bothered. Besides, who’s going to look out for you if we’re
both out of it?” I teased, trying not to let any of the worry bother me.

“True, true. I’m
not planning on telling anyone else apart from the people who have to know that
I’ve done anything, so I’d rather you didn’t say anything. I just want to keep
it so it’s my own enjoyment.”

“Of course, I
wouldn’t tell anyone.” I’d already assumed that was her plan. Emma was a pretty
private person most of the time, especially when it came to things like this.
She’d convinced everyone in her dance class she was actually eighteen when
she’d been using her fake ID, just so the truth never got back to anyone. Her
parents would have been very unimpressed by it all. I was okay, since I’d been
eighteen since September. My mum wasn’t opposed to me going out – I just had to
lie about who it was with, since Emma was underage.

Thankfully, Luke
had been eighteen since the beginning, too, and so the past few months I’d had
an easy excuse.

Emma really trusted
me more than anyone. “Emma,” I averted my gaze slightly. “I think I’m going to
break up with Luke.”

Her eyes bugged.
“What? Why? I thought you two were perfect for each other.”

“We
are
, in
almost every way, but he just has no sex drive at all. I’m dying over here.”

She giggled at my
flailing expression. “Well, that definitely wasn’t what I was expecting.”

I groaned. “I’m
serious, though. He never wants to and I’m apparently just hornier than he is.
And well,” I did sigh this time and the humour completely drained from my
voice. “It was enough to make me cheat on him, so I’m not really just thinking
about leaving him, I
am
leaving him.”

Emma’s smile
dimmed, too. Neither of us were relationship gurus, Emma even less so than me,
but she’d watched enough Jerry Springer that I hoped she had some advice.

Cheating on
someone wasn’t the kind of thing I ever imagined I’d do – I’d always thought I
was a decent person. The fact Emma was genuinely shocked at least made me feel
a bit better.

“What on Earth
happened? How were you even in the situation to cheat on him with someone?”
Emma scowled at me and I had the decency to be completely ashamed. Luke was
just a really nice guy and he didn’t deserve this.

“You have to
promise not to tell anyone,
anyone
, no matter what your opinion is.”

Emma frowned and
actually began to look concerned. No doubt endless possibilities were running
through her mind. I wondered if she’d have realised what had happened. “Fine. I
promise and you know you can trust that.”

I did. “I fucked
Mr. Lane for an A. Well, three hundred words out of one thousand five hundred.
I still have another one thousand two hundred to earn.”

Emma was staring,
working her head around it with short shakes of her head. “You’re kidding?
Please tell me this was all a big joke.”

My cheeks burned
with shame. “Unfortunately not. I kind of never told you how much I fancied
him, it was embarrassing.”

Emma buried her
head in her hands. “You’re so fucked.”

I lay down,
staring at her ceiling and torn between smiling and crying. Mr. Lane had been
fun and I couldn’t quite bring myself to regret it. “I know. I just, I really
think he’s hot and even though I only gave him a blowjob it was like the most
intense thing I’ve ever done.”

Emma was a virgin and
it probably didn’t mean much to her and I didn’t have a wealth of experience
either. I just knew it had felt really good and that I wanted more. “I mean, as
long as you’re breaking up with Luke, I don’t really know what else there is to
say. You really fucked him over.”

“I know. I feel
like I should just say no to both of them, accept my E and stay away from
relationships until I’m sure I’m not just a complete dickhead anymore.”

Emma sat by my
head and played with my hair, letting out a sigh. “Don’t hate yourself forever.
Everyone messes up and it’s not like you’ve been together forever. Neither of
you really love each other, right? It’s not the end of the world if you break
up.”

It was true. I
mean, I really liked him, but I definitely couldn’t say love was in the
equation just yet. It had only been three months since our first real
conversation. Maybe that was Luke’s problem – he just didn’t care enough about
me to be horny all the time. “I suppose so,” I allowed, even though it didn’t
help my guilt at all right now. “What about Mr. Lane, though?”

Emma shook her
head and grinned. “I can’t believe we’re even having this conversation. You
slept
with your teacher
.”

“Well, I didn’t
sleep with him
yet
. That’ll probably be within the next couple of days
if I turn up.”

“I mean, he’s
basically blackmailing you into this. Don’t you think that’s a bit weird?”

I shrugged. “Well,
if I didn’t want to I guess it would, but I feel like he must have known I
liked him, otherwise I could have just ratted him out to the school and stuff,”
I scratched the back of my head. “And I kind of undid my top button before I
went to talk to him. And I kind of told him I was willing to do anything. I
don’t think he really thought he was making me do anything I didn’t want to.”

Emma rolled her
eyes. “Of course you did. You know, your personality is incredibly weird. Most
of the time you can’t even meet eyes with someone, how on Earth did you do all
that?”

“I’m not entirely
sure. I think I was kind of desperate. And I just really wasn’t expecting him
to even notice, I hadn’t planned the ‘I’ll do anything’ line, honest.”

Emma chuckled.
“Well, I guess if it’s like that it’s not
too
weird. Maybe not, anyway.
I’m not entirely convinced he’s not a creep.”

“I don’t think it really
matters if he’s a creep since we’re not in it for anything more than the sex.
Besides, I could just report him if he started being weird anyway.”

It was kind of
strange to admit I slept with someone I didn’t know a single thing about. I
didn’t even know his first name.

And I didn’t
really care.

I’d always been
one for the big romantic daydreams until I started dating Luke. Luke had
satisfied that part of me and so now my imagination was teeming with steamy
visions that were anything but romantic.

“I’m never going
to be able to look at him the same, you know. How am I supposed to listen to
him teaching me English without wanting to giggle?”

I grinned. “How am
I supposed to listen to him teaching without picturing him naked? And he looks
great
naked, by the way.”

“He’s not really
my type, and not just because of the age thing. Do you know how old he actually
is by the way? I mean, he’s got to be nearly thirty, right?”

“I’m not sure.
That was my guess, too, so it’s probably about right.”

“I suppose he is
pretty good looking. I bet the other girls talk about him, too.”

“I wonder if he’s
ever done this kind of thing before,” I mused aloud. “He always seems so smooth
that I’m not sure whether he seemed nervous to propose the situation to me or
not.”

“I don’t think it
really matters, does it? Not if it’s purely sexual.” Emma knew what she was
doing, but I wasn’t going to fall for that.

“I was only
wondering,” I fixed her with a serious look. “I don’t know anything about him,
there’s nothing even remotely romantic there.”

Emma had to give
me that. “I suppose so,” her mum shouted up the stairs and I was kind of
grateful the conversation was coming to an end. I felt better after hearing
what Emma had to say, even if the self-hatred hadn’t dissipated yet. “Be right
back.”

I figured I may as
well start checking out MDMA now to see what I’d be dealing with when it came
to next weekend. I was greeted instead by an email.

My eyebrows shot
up at the content.
You’ve been selected to play for the team during the
county tournament
. Well, that was certainly a surprise. Our team did well,
but I was never sure I was a leading factor in that. We rotated who was picked
for the team and I couldn’t consider myself a regular.

The dates were
fine – it was a weekend event, but I didn’t often do much with my weekends and
I really enjoyed playing badminton.

I was pretty
excited.

The MDMA thing
made me feel better, too, when I actually read up on it. I could only manage a
quick skim before Emma came back, but overall I wasn’t too worried. I just
needed to make sure she didn’t drink too much and went to the toilet and it
should all be fine.