Authors: William Shakespeare
MOPSA
    Is it true, think you?
AUTOLYCUS
    Very true, and but a month old.
DORCAS
    Bless me from marrying a usurer!
AUTOLYCUS
    Here's the midwife's name to't, one Mistress
Tale-porter
287
,
      and five or six honest wives that were present. Why
      should I carry lies abroad?
MOPSA
    Pray you now, buy it.
CLOWN
    Come on,
lay it by
291
, and let's first see more ballads.
      We'll buy the other things anon.
AUTOLYCUS
    Here's another ballad of a fish that appeared upon
      the coast on Wednesday the
fourscore
294
of April,
forty
      thousand fathom
above water, and sung this ballad against
      the hard hearts of maids. It was thought she was a woman
      and was turned into a cold fish for she would not
exchange
      flesh
297
with one that loved her. The ballad is very pitiful and as
      true.
DORCAS
    Is it true too, think you?
AUTOLYCUS
    Five
justices'
301
hands
at it, and witnesses more than
      my
pack
302
will hold.
CLOWN
    Lay it by too; another.
AUTOLYCUS
    This is a merry ballad, but a very pretty one.
MOPSA
    Let's have some merry ones.
AUTOLYCUS
    Why, this is a
passing
306
merry one and goes to the
      tune of âTwo maids wooing a man'. There's scarce a maid
      westward but she sings it. 'Tis in
request
308
, I can tell you.
MOPSA
    We can both sing it. If thou'lt
bear a part
309
, thou shalt
      hear. 'Tis in three parts.
DORCAS
    We had the tune
on't
311
a month ago.
AUTOLYCUS
    I can bear my part. You must know 'tis my
      occupation.
Have at it with you
313
.
        [
They sing the
]
song
AUTOLYCUS
    Get you hence, for I must go
          Where it fits not you to know.
DORCAS
    Whither?
MOPSA
    O, whither?
DORCAS
    Whither?
MOPSA
    It becomes thy oath full well,
          Thou to me thy secrets tell.
DORCAS
    Me too, let me go thither.
MOPSA
   Â
Or
322
thou goest to th'
grange
or mill.
DORCAS
    If to either, thou dost
ill
323
.
AUTOLYCUS
    Neither.
DORCAS
    What, neither?
AUTOLYCUS
    Neither.
DORCAS
    Thou hast sworn my love to be.
MOPSA
    Thou hast sworn it more to me.
        Then whither goest? Say, whither?
CLOWN
    We'll
have this song out anon
330
by ourselves. My
      father and the gentlemen are in
sad
331
talk, and we'll not
      trouble them. Come, bring away thy pack after me.
      Wenches, I'll buy for you both. Pedlar, let's have the first
      choice. Follow me, girls.
[
Exit with Dorcas and Mopsa
]
AUTOLYCUS
    And you shall pay well for 'em.
Song
Will you buy any tape,
Follows them, singing
          Or lace for your cape,
          My dainty duck, my dear-a?
          Any silk, any thread,
          Any
toys
340
for your head,
          Of the new'st and finest, finest wear-a?
          Come to the pedlar.
          Money's a meddler.
          That doth
utter
344
all men's
ware-a
.
Exit
[
Enter Servant
]
SERVANT
    Master, there is three
carters
345
, three shepherds,
      three
neat-herds
346
, three swine-herds, that have
made
      themselves all men of hair
. They call themselves
Saltiers
347
, and
    they have a dance which the wenches say is a
gallimaufry of
      gambols
348
, because they are not in't. But they themselves are
      o'th'mind, if it be not too rough for some that know little but
     Â
bowling
351
, it will please plentifully.
SHEPHERD
    Away! We'll none on't; here has been too much
     Â
homely
353
foolery already. I know, sir, we weary you.
POLIXENES
    You weary those that refresh us. Pray let's see these
      four
threes
355
of herdsmen.
SERVANT
    One three of them, by their own report, sir, hath
      danced before the king, and not the worst of the three but
      jumps twelve foot and a half
by th'square
358
.
SHEPHERD
    Leave your
prating
359
. Since these good men are
      pleased, let them come in. But quickly now.
SERVANT
    Why, they
stay
361
at door, sir.
Goes to the door
Here a dance of twelve Satyrs
To Shepherd
POLIXENES
    O,
father
362
,
you'll know more of that
          hereafter
.â
      Is it not too far gone? 'Tis time to part them.
To Camillo
     Â
He's simple
364
and tells much.â
              How now, fair shepherd!
To Florizel
      Your heart is full of something that does take
      Your mind from feasting. Sooth, when I was young
      And
handed
367
love as you do, I was
wont
      To load my
she with knacks
368
. I would have ransacked
      The pedlar's silken treasury and have poured it
      To her acceptance. You have let him go
      And nothing
marted
371
with him. If your lass
     Â
Interpretation should abuse
372
and call this
      Your lack of love or
bounty
373
, you were
straited
      For a reply, at least if you
make a care
      Of happy holding her
374
.
FLORIZEL
    Old sir, I know
      She prizes not such trifles as these are.
      The gifts she
looks
378
from me are packed and locked
      Up in my heart, which I have given already,
      But not
delivered
380
. O, hear me
breathe my life
      Before this ancient sir, whom, it should seem,
      Hath
sometime
382
loved.â I take thy hand, this hand,
To Perdita
      As soft as dove's down and as white as it,
      Or Ethiopian's tooth, or the fanned snow that's
bolted
384
      By th'northern
blasts
385
twice o'er.
Takes her hand
POLIXENES
    What follows this?
      How prettily th'young swain seems to
wash
387
      The hand
was
388
fair before! I have
put you out
.
      But
to
389
your
protestation
: let me hear
      What you profess.
FLORIZEL
    Do, and be witness to't.
POLIXENES
    And this my neighbour too?
FLORIZEL
    And he, and more
      Than he, and men, the earth, the heavens, and all;
      That were I crowned the most imperial monarch,
     Â
Thereof
396
most worthy, were I the fairest youth
      That ever made eye swerve, had force and knowledge
      More than was ever man's, I would not prize them
      Without her love; for her employ them all,
     Â
Commend them and condemn them to her service
      Or to their own perdition
400
.
POLIXENES
    Fairly offered.
CAMILLO
    This shows a sound affection.
SHEPHERD
    But, my daughter,
      Say you the like to him?
PERDITA
    I cannot speak
      So well, nothing so well. No, nor mean better.
     Â
By th'pattern of mine own thoughts I cut out
      The purity of his
408
.
SHEPHERD
    Take hands, a bargain!
      And, friends unknown, you shall bear witness to't.
      I give my daughter to him, and will make
      Her
portion
413
equal his.
FLORIZEL
    O, that must be
      I'th'virtue of your daughter:
one being dead
415
,
      I shall have more than you can dream of yet,
      Enough then for your wonder. But come on,
     Â
Contract us 'fore these witnesses
418
.
SHEPHERD
    Come, your hand.
      And, daughter, yours.
POLIXENES
   Â
Soft
421
,
swain
, awhile, beseech you.
      Have you a father?
FLORIZEL
    I have, but what of him?
POLIXENES
    Knows he of this?
FLORIZEL
    He neither does nor shall.
POLIXENES
    Methinks a father
      Is at the nuptial of his son a guest
      That best
becomes
428
the table. Pray you once more,
      Is not your father grown
incapable
      Of
429
reasonable affairs? Is he not stupid
      With age and
alt'ring rheums
431
? Can he speak? Hear?
      Know man from man?
Dispute
432
his own estate?
    Lies he not bed-rid? And again
does nothing
      But what he did being childish
433
?
FLORIZEL
    No, good sir.
      He has his health and ampler strength indeed
      Than most have of his age.
POLIXENES
    By my white beard,
      You offer him, if this be so, a wrong
      Something
unfilial
440
.
Reason
my son
      Should choose himself a wife, but as good reason
      The father, all whose joy is nothing else
      But fair
posterity
443
, should
hold some counsel
      In such a business.
FLORIZEL
    I
yield
445
all this.
      But for some other reasons, my grave sir,
      Which 'tis not fit you know, I not acquaint
      My father of this business.
POLIXENES
    Let him know't.
FLORIZEL
    He shall not.
POLIXENES
    Prithee let him.
FLORIZEL
    No, he must not.
SHEPHERD
    Let him, my son. He shall not need to grieve
      At knowing of thy choice.
FLORIZEL
    Come, come, he must not.
     Â
Mark
456
our contract.
Takes off disguise
POLIXENES
    Mark your divorce, young sir,
      Whom son I dare not call. Thou art too base
      To be acknowledged. Thou a sceptre's heir,
      That thus
affects
460
a
sheep-hook
!â Thou, old
To Shepherd
          traitor,
      I am sorry that by hanging thee I can
      But shorten thy life one week.â And thou, fresh
To Perdita
          piece
    Of
excellent
463
witchcraft, who
of force
must know
      The royal fool thou
cop'st with
464
â
SHEPHERD
    O, my heart!
POLIXENES
    I'll have thy beauty scratched with briers and made
      More
homely
467
than thy state.â For thee,
fond
boy,
To Florizel
      If I may ever know thou dost but sigh
      That thou no more shalt see this
knack
469
, as never