The Warlock in Spite of Himself - Warlock 01 (11 page)

'I?' Tuan tried to choke back a laugh and almost succeeded. 'Oh, nay!

Would that I were; but I have not seen the inside of a church for three score and more Sundays!'

So, Rod noted, his motive for helping the poor probably wasn't too hypocritical, whatever else it might be.

He looked into his mug. 'So you feed and clothe all these people out of the pennies they bring you, eh?'

'Nay; that is but a beginning. But with that much earnest proof of our good intentions, our noble Queen found us worthy of a livelihood.'

Rod stared. 'You mean the Queen is putting the lot of you on the dole?'

Tuan grinned with mischief. 'Aye, though she knows not whom she aids. She knows not the House of Clovis by name, knows only that she gives the good Brom O'Berin moneys to care for her poor.'

'And Brom gives it to you.'

'Aye. And for his part, he is grateful that there are fewer thievings and murders among the dark alleys.'

Rod nodded. 'Very shrewd. And this whole setup is your idea, is it?'

'Oh, nay! 'Twas the Mocker who thought of it; but none would give ear to him.'

Rod stared. 'The Mocker? You mean that twisted fugitive from the late show is boss of this operation?'

Tuan frowned, shaking his head. 'Men will not follow him, friend Gallowglass; there is nothing of governance in him. He is host, keeping the inn, doling out goods as they are needed - a steward, and only a steward, but a good one. You will find him a sharper clerk than any; aye, even the Queen's Lord Exchequer.'

'I see, just a steward.' But also the man who holds the pocketbook, Rod added mentally. The brains of the outfit, too. Tuan might know how to make people do what he wanted; but did he know what he wanted?

Yes, of course he did. Hadn't the Mocker told him? Which made the Mocker the local political economist, and probably Tuan's speech-writer. Rod leaned back, rubbing his chin. 'And you manage to keep them in this decadent luxury with only the alms the beggars bring in? Plus the Queen's shilling, of course.'

Tuan grinned sheepishly and leaned forward, nodding. ''Tis not easy done, friend Gallowglass. These beggars are loath to let any man rule them. It is tedious labor, cajoling, threatening, flattering - a man grows a-weary of it. Yet it is well worth the doing.'

Rod nodded. 'It would take a man with no false pride, and less false humility, and one who could see into his fellow's heart.'

Tuan blushed.

'Such a man,' said Rod, 'could make himself king of the beggars.'

But Tuan shook his head, eyes closed. 'No, there is no king here, friend Gallowglass. A lord of the manor, perhaps, but naught more.'

You don't want to be king?'

Tuan's shoulders shrugged with a snort of laughter. 'The beggars would not hear of it!'

'That wasn't what I asked.'

Tuan's eyes locked with Rod's, the smile fading from the boyish face. Then Tuan caught Rod's meaning, and his eyes hardened. 'Nay!' he spat.

'I do not seek the throne.'

'Then why are you trying to lead the beggars against the Queen?' Rod rapped out.

The smile eased across Tuan's face again; he sat back, looking very satisfied with himself. 'Ah, you know of my plotting! Then may I ask of you outright, friend Rod, will you join with us when we march on the castle?'

Rod felt his face setting like plaster. His eyes locked with Tuan's again; his voice was very calm. 'Why me?'

'We shall have need of as many friends in the Queen's Guard as we may .....'

'You must already have quite a few,' Rod murmured, 'if you know already-that I joined the Queen's Guard today.'

Tuan's grin widened; his eyelids drooped.

A stray fact clicked into place in Rod's mind.

'If I were to search through this hall,' he said carefully, 'would I find the three men who attacked you tonight?'

Tuan nodded, eyes dancing.

'A put-up job,' Rod said, nodding with him. 'A small performance, arranged solely for my benefit, with the single purpose of maneuvering me in here for a recruiting lecture. You do know how to manage people, Tuan McReady.'

Tuan blushed, and looked down.

'But what if I don't want to join you, Tuan McReady? Will I leave the House of Clovis alive this night?'

Tuan's head came up, eyes boring into Rod's.

'Only,' he said, 'if you are an excellent swordsman, and a warlock to boot.'

Rod nodded slowly, the events of the past two days whirling through his mind. For a moment, he was tempted to join; he had no doubt that he could maneuver himself into the throne after the revolution. But no; what Tuan said was true. It took a man with an inborn gift of mass hypnotism to control the beggars. Rod might take the throne, but the beggars - and the Mocker, and whoever was behind him - would not let him keep it.

No, the power structure had to stay the way it was; a constitutional monarchy was the only hope for democracy on this planet. Then, too, there was Catharine....

Then, the jarring note in the score of events caught Rod's ear. He was hung up on Catharine, probably she was the Dream. But he had liked Tuan at first sight. How could he like them both if they were really working against one another?

Of course, all Tuan's forthright charm might be an act, but somehow Rod doubted it.

No. If Tuan had really wanted the throne, he could have wooed Catharine, and could have won her - Rod had no doubt about that. So Tuan was supporting the Queen. How he figured his demagoguery could help her, Rod couldn't figure, but somehow it made sense that Tuan believed he was.

Then why the elaborate plot to get Rod into the House of Clovis?

To test Rod, of course; to find out if he was to be trusted next to the Queen.

Which made sense, if this kid had dealings with Brom O'Berin. It would be just like Brom to try to drum up popular support for the Queen in just this way - but why the propaganda for a march on the castle?

Tuan probably had an answer to that one, and speaking of answers, it was about time Rod came up with one.

He gave Tuan a savage grin and rose, with his hand on his sword. 'No thanks. I'll take my chances with swordcraft and sorcery.'

Tuan's eyes lit with joy; he caught Rod's arm. 'Well spoken, friend Gallowglass! I had hoped you would answer thus. Now sit, and hear the truth of my plot.'

Rod shook his hand off. 'Draw,' he said between his teeth.

'Nay, nay! I would not draw 'gainst a friend. I have played a low trick on you, but you must not hold anger; 'twas for a good purpose. But sit, and I shall tell you.'

'I've heard all I want.' Rod started to draw his sword. Tuan caught Rod's forearm again, and this time his hand wouldn't shake off. Rod looked into Tuan's eyes, jaw tightened and arm muscles straining; but slowly and steadily, his sword was forced back into its scabbard.

'Sit,' said Tuan, and he forced Rod back into his chair as easily as though Rod had been a child.

'Now hear my plot.' Tuan let go of Rod's arm and smiled, as warmly as though nothing had happened. 'The Queen gives us money, and the beggars know that she gives it; but the taking of a gift raises only burning anger in the taker. It we would win friends for the Queen, we must find a way to transmute this anger to gratitude.

Rod nodded, frowning.

'Thus we must make the Queen's shilling something other than a gift.'

'And you found a way to do it.'

'Not I,' Tuan confessed, 'but the Mocker. "When is a gift not a gift?" he riddled me, and answered, "Why, when 'tis a right."'

Tuan leaned back, spreading his hands. 'And there you have it, so easily done. The beggars shall march to the castle and cry to the Queen that she owes them bread and meat, because it is their right. And she will give it to them, and they will be grateful.'

Rod smiled, rubbing his chin. 'Very shrewd,' he said, nodding, but to himself he added: If it works. But it won't; people who have money enjoy giving for charity, but they won't give a cent if you tell them they must. And how grateful will the beggars be when she refuses them, and calls out the army to drive them away?

And even if she did yield to their demands, what then? What about the sense of power it would give them? Beggars, forcing a Queen's hand!

They wouldn't stop at bread and meat; no, they'd be back with more demands in a week, with or without Tuan.

Oh, yes, it was a very shrewd plan; and Tuan had been sucked into it beautifully. The Mocker couldn't lose; and neither could the off-planet totalitarians who were behind him.

But Tuan meant well. His intentions fairly gleamed. He was a little weak on political theory; but his intentions were fine. Rod raised his mug for a deep draft, then stared into it, watching the swirl of the heated wine. 'Yet some say that the House of Clovis would pull Catharine off her throne.'

'Nay, nay!' Tuan stared, appalled. 'I love the Queen!' Rod studied the boy's sincere, open face and made his own interpretation of the statement.

He looked back into his mug. 'So do I,' he said, with more truth than he liked. 'But even so, I'd have to admit she's, shall we say, not acting wisely.'

Tuan heaved a great sigh and clasped his hands. 'That is true, most true. She means so well, but she does so badly.'

Have you looked in a mirror lately, Mr Kettle? Rod wondered. Aloud, he said, 'Why, how is that?'

Tuan smiled sadly. 'She seeks to undo in a day what ages of her grandsires have wrought. There is much evil in this kingdom, that I will gladly admit. But a pile of manure is not moved with one swing of a shovel.'

'True,' Rod admitted, 'and the saltpeter under it can be explosive.'

'The great lords do not see that she is casting out devils,' Tuan went on. 'They see only that she seeks to fill this land with one voice, and only one - and that hers.'

'Well' - Rod lifted his mug, face bleak with resignation -'here's to her; let's hope she makes it.'

'An' you think it possible,' said Tuan, 'tha'rt a greater fool than I; and I am known far and wide as a most exceptional fool.'

Rod lowered the mug untasted. 'Are you speaking from a general conviction, or do you have some particulars in mind?'

Tuan set one forefinger against the other. 'A throne rests on two legs: primus, the noblemen, who are affronted by anything new, and therefore oppose the Queen.'

'Thanks,' said Rod With a bittersweet smile, 'for letting me in on the secret.'

'Left to themselves,' said Tuan, 'the nobles might abide her for love of her father; but there are the councillors.'

'Yes.' Rod caught his lower lip between his teeth. 'I take it the lords do whatever their councillors tell them?'

'Or what they tell the lords not to do, which comes to the same thing. And the councillors speak with one voice - Durer's.'

'Durer?' Rod scowled. 'Who's he?'

'Councillor to my Lord Loguire.' Tuan's mouth twisted, bitter. 'He hath some influence with Loguire, which is a miracle; for Loguire is a most stubborn man. Thus, while Loguire lives, Catharine may stand. But when Loguire dies, Catharine falls; for Loguire's heir hates the Queen.'

'Heir?' Rod raised an eyebrow. 'Loguire has a son?'

'Two,' said Tuan with a tight smile. 'The younger is a fool, who loves his best enemy; and the elder is a hothead, who loves Durer's flattery. Thus, what Durer will say, Anselm Loguire will do.'

Rod raised his mug. 'Let us wish the Loguire long life.'

'Aye,' said Tuan, fervently. 'For Anselm hath an ancient grievance against the Queen.'

Rod frowned. 'What grievance?'

'I know not.' Tuan's face sagged till he looked like a bloodhound with sinus trouble. 'I know not.'

Rod sat back, resting one hand on the hilt of his sword. 'So he and Durer both want the Queen's downfall. And the other nobles'll follow their lead - if old Loguire dies. So much for one leg of the throne. What's the other one?'

'Secundus,' said Tuan, with a Cub Scout salute, 'the people: peasants, tradesmen, and merchants. They love her for this newfound easing of their sorrows; but they fear her for her witches.'

'Ah. Yes. Her. . . witches.' Rod scowled, managing to look sharp-eyed and competent while his brain reeled. Witches as a political element?!

'For ages,' said Tuan, 'the witches have been put to the torture till they forswore the Devil, or have undergone the trial of water or, failing all else, been burned at the stake.'

For a moment, Rod felt a stab of compassion for generations of espers.

'But the Queen harbors them now; and it is rumored by some that she is herself a witch.'

Rod managed to shake off his mental fog long enough to croak, 'I take it this doesn't exactly inspire the people with unflagging zeal for the Queen and her cause.'

Tuan bit his lip. 'Let us say that they are unsure...'

'Scared as hell,' Rod translated. 'But I notice you didn't include the beggars as part of the people.'

Tuan shook his head. 'Nay, they are apart, frowned and spat upon by all. Yet of this flawed timber, I hope to carve a third leg for the Queen's throne.'

Rod digested the words, studying Tuan's face.

He sat back in his chair, lifted his mug. 'You just may have what the Queen needs, there.' He drank. Lowering the mug, he said, 'I suppose the councillors are doing everything they can to deepen the people's tear?'

Tuan shook his head, brow wrinkled in puzzlement. 'Nay. they do nothing of the sort. Almost, one would think, they do not know the people live.' He frowned into his mug, sloshing the wine about inside. 'Yet there is little need to tell the people they must fear.'

'They know it all too well already?'

'Aye, for they have seen that all the Queen's witches cannot keep the banshee off her roof.'

Rod frowned, puzzled. 'So let it wear a groove in the battlements if it wants to! It's not doing any harm, is it?'

Tuan looked up, surprised. 'Dost not know the meaning of the banshee, Rod Gallowglass?'

Rod's stomach sank; nothing like displaying your ignorance of local legends when you're trying to be inconspicuous.

'When the banshee appears on the roof,' said Tuan, 'someone in the house will die. And each time the banshee has walked the battlements, Catharine hath escaped death by a hair.'