The Truth in Lies (The Truth in Lies Saga) (29 page)

Numb. 

Hollow. 

Alone. 

These were the feelings I had. 

I had come to this place to break Olivia’s heart, only to have mine crushed instead.  All of my hopes and dreams were shattered by two little words.  Drew was hurting, upset, and there was nothing I could do about it. 

This changed everything. 

My quaint apartment looked and felt empty.  All of the pictures were pulled off the walls, sheets hung haplessly over my furniture, and a feeling of emptiness engulfed my tiny abode.   

So much had changed in my life over a matter of months that it was uncanny to think of how little time had really passed.  I went from being an expectant mother, to a single woman being out in the world for the first time on my own, to falling in love with my best friend’s boyfriend only to discover he loved me too.  Yet some things were never meant to be.

Days had passed since Olivia dropped the bombshell on Drew and me, but it felt more like years.  All our hopes and dreams vanished with two little words – I’m pregnant.  It was unlike Drew not to contact me for days on end, but that’s exactly what happened.

The hardest part was dealing with Olivia.  Hiding my own heartbreak to take care of her was more than even I could bear. 

Sitting alone with her in the restaurant, staring at the door Drew had disappeared through, I felt as if my whole world was crumbling around me.

“How could he?” Olivia cried, burying her face in her hands.  “He was supposed to be happy about this.”

Forcing back the sobs that were fighting to escape my chest, I patted her hand.  “You took him by surprise, Liv.  How’d you expect him to react?” I questioned.

“Happy.  He’s going to be a father,” she sobbed.  Mascara drenched tears trickled down her face. 

“How long have you known?” I choked out, desperate to keep my own tears at bay.

“A little over a week or so.”

I nodded.  “And when you first discovered you were pregnant, were you overcome with excitement?”

Olivia sucked her trembling lip into her mouth, nodding her head.  “I was.  I knew this would fix everything.  Drew and I would finally be happy.”

Her reaction shocked me.  “You wanted this?” I choked, wiping under my eye, the tears to strong too contain.

“Yes,” she sniffled. 

That’s when I realized Olivia was no different from me.  Had I not done the same thing to
Nate?  The only difference was Nate and I planned our baby together. 

She was trying to save her relationship by becoming a mother.  Deluded as that may seem, I could relate to her logic.

“Are you in love with Drew?” I asked, barely able to breathe as I anticipated her answer.

“Maybe,” she said.

“I see,” was all I could muster to say.

“Kenz, what am I going to do?”

I squeezed her hand, my whole body cold.  Tears gathered at the corner of my eyes, willing me to let them fall.  Instead, I plastered my best smile on my face and looked her square in the eyes.

“I’ll tell you what you’re going to do.  First, you’re going to go home, take a nice long hot bath, and relax.  Then, you’re going to go to sleep.  Tomorrow is a new day.  Drew will have had time to let things sink in, and if I know him, he’ll come around.  Drew’s the greatest guy I know, and he won’t leave you high and dry.”

“You really think so?” she asked, hope filling her voice.

“I really think so,” I said, hoping I sounded convincing.  Who I was trying to convince though, I wasn’t sure.  But at that point, I figured we both needed to remember the man that apparently we were both in love with had a good heart, and was just caught by surprise.

“I knew having you here tonight was the best idea.  You’ve been such a good friend to both Drew and me.  What would I have ever done without you?”

Friend.  If she only knew what I’d done, she wouldn’t be calling me her friend. Drew’s reaction, while completely unusual for him, wasn’t unwarranted.  Deep down, I wished it had been me that had run out of the building like that. 

Thankfully, Olivia didn’t enforce the girlfriend rule, and beg me to stay with her.  Shortly after her announcement, we left the restaurant.  And to be honest, I couldn’t get out of there quick enough.  Getting a cab without Olivia realizing that I had been abandoned wasn’t as hard as I thought it might be.  As we got up, I told her I needed to go to the washroom first.  She accepted that, hugged me and left.  After she disappeared out the door, I pulled my cell phone from my purse, hoping to see Drew had left me a message.  That had been a pipe dream.  So, I did what I had to, and called a taxi.

The moment I got in the cab, I fell apart.  The poor driver thought I was having a seizure, I was crying so hard.  I left message after message begging Drew to call me.

“Andy, it’s Mickie, baby, please call me back.  I’m worried.  You ran out so fast.”

Nothing.  No return call.  No text message.  Absolutely nothing.

I told myself he needed time, so I went home and cried myself to sleep.  It was the first night since Drew and I had gotten together that I slept alone.  My bed felt cold and empty, but miraculously sleep finally came.

The next morning, I woke with a jolt.  My cell phone was ringing.

“Andy?” I answered without even looking at the caller ID.

“No, McKenzie.  It’s Jared.”

And once again the flood of tears poured down my face.  I told him everything that happened. 

“I’ll be there in thirty,” Jared said, before hanging up.

After everything I had put him through, he was still there for me.  What I did to deserve having someone so loyal in my life, I would never know. 

And just as Jared promised, he was at my side in thirty minutes.  When he arrived, I was making yet another call to Drew.

“Andy, it’s Mickie, again.  I haven’t heard from you and I’m getting really worried.  Please call me.  I love you.”

The knock at the door startled me.  I rushed to it hoping it was Drew on the other side, but alas, it was Jared keeping his promise.  Jared stayed with me the entire day, holding me while I cried, bashing Olivia every chance he could, and jumping whenever my cell phone rang.

Olivia called me several times during the day, wanting to know if I had heard from Drew.  Apparently, I wasn’t the only one he was avoiding.  As soon as I confirmed his lack of communication, she disconnected the call. 

“Don’t you find it odd that she has yet to ask you over?” Jared questioned.

I shook my head.  It felt swollen and tender from the crying headache that was developing.  “Nah, Olivia doesn’t like showing weakness,” I replied.

“Yeah, but she likes an audience,” Jared muttered, petting my hair.

The day moved so slow that I could physically feel each second tick by.

That night I fell asleep in Jared’s arms, still crying.

Monday came all too soon for me.  Jared drove me to work, against his better judgment, he said.  But being around my kids helped me more than he could understand.  They kept my mind busy.  For those eight hours, I didn’t think of anything but their wellbeing. 

But when the day was over, I checked my phone only to discover nothing from Drew.  After Jared delivered me home, promising to return with an overnight bag for another extended visit, I made
yet another phone call.

“Andy, it’s me, yet again.  I guess you’re ignoring my calls.  I wish you wouldn’t.  I’m here for you if you’ll let me be.  I love you.  Please call me.  I’m worried sick.”

When days passed by and he still hadn’t responded, I prepared to drive to Longboat Key to check on him.  I feared the worst had happened, and I couldn’t take the silence any longer.  Jared agreed with my decision and even though he’d finally gone home, after days of staying with me, he was ready to go out there with me to check on Drew.

After taking a quick shower and dressing in something comfortable, I grabbed my keys and was on my way out the door when my phone rang.  I glanced at the Caller ID.  My heart sank again, as it always did, because it wasn’t the person I wanted it to be.  It was Olivia.

I dropped my keys back on the table and sat down on the couch.  This conversation wouldn’t last long. I was pretty sure she was making her usual call to see if I had any news on Drew.

“Kenz, you’ll never believe it,” were the first words Olivia squealed after I said hello.

“What’s up?” I asked.

“I talked to Drew.  He’s agreed to be a part of the baby’s life.  Isn’t that wonderful?”

That’s when it hit me.  Things with Drew and me were officially over.  He’d chosen Olivia.  But then why wouldn’t he?  She was the mother of his child. 

I sucked in a jagged breath, tears swimming in my eyes, as she relayed her news.  “That’s…that’s great,” I managed. 

“I know!  I’m so happy.  You were right.  He just needed time.  He apologized for how he initially reacted and told me that whatever the baby and I need, he’d take care of it.”

“Good to hear,” I mumbled, scraping my teeth over my bottom lip.

I swallowed hard, laying my head back on the back of my sofa.  I had to keep a grip on my emotions.  And the vast emptiness that had invaded my chest wasn’t helping any.

“Kenz, I really want to thank you again for being such a good friend.  If it hadn’t been for your reassurance that he’d come around, I don’t know what I would’ve done.”

And there went another dagger or more like salt being poured into the wound.  I was anything but a good friend.  I had broken the cardinal girl code rule by falling in love with Drew, and now I was reaping the consequences of my actions.  Karma really was a bitch.

“That’s what friends are for,” I whispered through the knot in my throat. 

“We have so much to do now to get ready for the baby.  Everything’s going to be so perfect now.  Just wait and see.”

Perfect for her, sure, but not for me.  It was bad enough that I was jealous of her for having heard from Drew before I did, but deep down, I was jealous of her for being pregnant too.  She was living my dream.  Becoming a mother, being cared for by the man she loves.  That was my dream, and now her reality.

Secretly, I had been holding out hope that Drew would show up at my door, pull me into his arms, and tell me everything would be okay.  But that was me, disillusioned by a fairytale ending.  Nothing ever worked the way they did in the movies.

“Liv, that’s my call waiting, can I call you back?” I lied.  I was about to lose it, and I couldn’t let her witness my full breakdown.

“Sure!” she giggled.  “Call me later.”

The phone clicked in my ear, and I simply slid off the couch, trapping myself between the sofa and the coffee table.  I drew my knees to my chest as a flood of tears rained down my cheeks.  My chest broke open like a canyon, and all I could do was wrap my arms around myself in a vain attempt to close the chasm.  The urge to run overwhelmed me.  But this time it wasn’t a need to run to the beach.  It was the urge to run away for good. 

I closed my eyes and tried to erase the imagines that plagued me of Drew’s smile, his touch, and even the sweet messages he sent me.  It all meant nothing now.  I heaved, my body shaking uncontrollably as guilt, agony, and grief filled me once again. 

All this time I thought fate had brought me and Drew together, but it seemed that it was really fate trying to keep us apart.

I reached for the phone that lay helplessly beside my knee, and did the only thing I could do. 

Olivia’s news solidified my doubts.  There was nothing left for me here.  I had to cut ties and move on.  It might upset Olivia, but in the end, I was doing this as much for her as I was me.

So, I called my parents and made arrangements to move back home.  It wasn’t the easiest decision I’d ever made, but it was the right one.  Not only was I leaving behind Drew and Olivia, but I was leaving Jared and my students as well.  While they were great reasons to stay, my heart and mind, for once, agreed that in order for me to heal, I had to leave. 

My parents accepted my decision, although my mother tried to argue with me.  Dad seemed more understanding.  Given the chance, I think he’d have flown out to get me for the pure satisfaction of
being able to kill Drew.

The next morning, I gave my notice to the school district and my apartment concerning my impending move back to Texas.  Luckily, Marcie didn’t hold me to a relenting fee.  She said my security deposit would cover everything, which led me to wonder how much Drew actually put down for me on the apartment.
  It seemed like everything in my life led straight to Drew, and no matter how hard I tried not to think about him, I couldn’t stop myself.  Each time his name would whisper through my mind, my heart would break over again.  Leaving was my only option for survival.

With all my arrangements in place, and the fact that Drew still hadn’t contact
ed me, I decided it was time to send him one last message. 

Congratulations, Andrew. I hope you find all the happiness you deserve. I know you’ll make a terrific father. Goodbye.

Pressing send on that text message was the hardest thing I had ever done in my life, but I did it.

With a heavy heart, I started the process of packing my meager belongings.

I turned on my stereo to drown out my mind.  Too much thinking was killing me, and I needed a little peace; even if only for a moment.  A little rock music seemed to be the ticket.  That was until my cell phone chirped, interrupting my heavy metal induced solace.