The Truth (17 page)

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Authors: Erin McCauley

BOOK: The Truth
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“Can you stay for a while after?” she asked, praying he’d say yes.

“There’s no need,” he answered matter of fact.

Stepping over to him, she reached for his arm to stop his retreat. “I thought maybe we could talk about us, and what happens now.”

Removing her hand, he replied, “There is no us. The rest, as far as Ryan is concerned, we’ll figure out as we need to.”

She watched him walk across the grass, and over the crest of the hill. She sank to her knees in despair when she heard the roar of his motorcycle fade into the distance.

She leaned against her friend’s headstone. “Oh Maggie, what have we done?”

Chapter 32

The following night, Grayson stood outside Lexie’s condo, desperately trying to find the courage to knock on the door. Tonight everything would change. There was no turning back. Tonight he’d begin a relationship with his son, and be forced to explain to him that the three of them couldn’t be a family.

How was he supposed to explain that to a four-year-old, when the thought of it made his heart ache? How was he supposed to raise his son with her, when he still loved her so much, knowing they couldn’t be together? It all seemed so unfair. How did things get so messed up? He knew he had to walk away from her, it was the only option he had considering she had no faith in him. Not as a human being, and certainly not as a man.

In the past six months, he’d lost the only two women he’d ever loved. But he knew he needed to hold on tightly to the good he’d discovered as well. Tonight, he’d introduce himself to his son. Not as his friend, but as his father.

His stomach turned. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d been so nervous. Wiping his hands on the front of his jeans, he cleared his throat and rang the doorbell.

Lexie opened the door, and he had to remind himself he was no longer free to scoop her into his arms. God, he wanted to. He wanted to talk about all of this with her, his discovery of Ryan, the truth about Maggie, even the heartache he felt over her.

Her eyes were free of makeup, swollen, and red. It was clear she’d been crying. He had to fight himself again as the urge to comfort her grew strong. Having just brushed past her, Ryan threw himself into Grayson’s arms.

“I’ve been looking for ya,” Ryan said, his eyes bright with pleasure. “I’ve missed you so much.”

Grayson knelt down and his heart lurched when Ryan wrapped his arms around his neck, and squeezed. He smelled of soap and fabric softener, and Grayson clung to him, holding him tightly, not wanting to let him go.

“I’ve missed you too, buddy,” Grayson told him, setting him back on his feet.

Ryan grabbed Grayson’s hand and dragged him past Lexie and into the kitchen. “Mom showed me how to bake a pie. I flatted the crust. It’s apple, want some?”

Not waiting for an answer, Ryan climbed onto the counter and pulled down three plates. He’d just reached for the knife when Lexie rushed in and placed her hand over his. “You know better,” she scolded, but her eyes remained gentle.

Ryan mumbled his apology and again grabbed for Grayson’s hand, leading him to the dining room table. “Mom said you’ve been doing person stuff. I’m glad you’re back. I wasn’t crying like Mom, but you were gone for a long time. I didn’t like it.”

Grayson’s heart warmed knowing his son had missed him. But it ached knowing Lexie had been crying and Ryan had noticed. “I’m sorry I’ve been gone for so long.” He reached out and patted Ryan’s shoulder.

Lexie placed a slice of pie in front of each of them and a glass of milk for Ryan. She offered Grayson some coffee and walked back to pour herself a cup after he’d declined. He could tell by the slump of her shoulders she was struggling to hold herself together. This wouldn’t be easy for either of them.

Taking a huge bite, Ryan smiled in delight. “Nummy, taste it,” he prompted. He watched as Grayson took a bite and nodded his head in appreciation. “Mom did the hard part. She won’t let me use the knife, keeps saying I’m too young, but I’m not.”

Smiling at him, Grayson said, “It’s only because she wants you to be safe. Knives can be very dangerous, even for adults.”

Ryan grunted and took another bite as Lexie sat down at the table. Grayson could see her nerves in the restlessness of her body and the shaking of her hands. He still had no idea what to say, and catching her eye, silently implored who should tell him. She nodded her head toward him, and looked down into her coffee cup, the tension heavy between them.

Grayson gulped and took a deep breath. “Ryan, we have something to tell you.” He searched for the words as his son looked at him with anticipation. Unable to find them, he looked over to Lexie for help only to find her still staring down. “Um … well … ”

“What?” Ryan looked at Grayson, and back at his mother. “You’re not leaving again, are you?” He looked terrified at the thought.

“No, it’s nothing like that,” Grayson reassured him. “In fact, I think it’s pretty good news, and I hope you’ll agree.” He took another deep breath and looked into his son’s curious face. “I’m … It turns out … um … Ryan, I’m your dad.” The air expelled from his lungs in a strong release of pressure.

Ryan began to bounce in his chair, his smile stretching from ear to ear. Grayson felt a surge of relief at the delight on his son’s face.

“I knew it!” Ryan exclaimed. “I prayed and prayed, and it worked!” He jumped from his chair and threw his arms around Grayson, almost knocking him backwards. Ryan then rounded the table and hugged his mother tightly. “Thank you,” Ryan bellowed and flopped back into his chair. Breathless now, Ryan beamed at Grayson. “Can I be the head man, like you were?”

Lexie and Grayson both looked over the table at each other, confusion etched in their brows. Grayson spoke first, “The head man?”

“At the wedding,” Ryan clarified. “Like you with Mark. I know I’m little, but I can do it. Please?” he begged.

“The wedding?” Lexie asked.

This time it was Ryan who looked perplexed. “Yeah, at yours and Grayson’s wedding, I wanna be the head man.”

Grayson’s stomach pitched, and he felt the sting of tears behind his eyes. He looked over at Lexie and watched her wipe the tears from her cheeks. He felt like a heel. “Ryan, your mom and I aren’t getting married.”

“But you just said you’re gonna be my dad,” Ryan’s bottom lip began to quiver.

Grayson stood up, lifted Ryan and sat back down with him on his lap. “No, I said I was your dad. I am your dad, really. I know this is all a bit confusing.”

Ryan pushed off Grayson’s lap and stood unsteadily before him. “So you’re not marrying us?” Ryan burst into tears and rushed from the room when Grayson shook his head. They both jumped at the loud bang of his bedroom door slamming.

Leaning onto the table, Grayson rested his head against the palms of his hands. After a few moments of silence, he heard Lexie get up.

“I’ll go talk to him,” she said.

“Should I come too?” he asked her, unsure of the proper way to handle this.

“No, but will you wait?” Her eyes implored him. “He may need to talk to you as well after I explain things.”

“Of course,” he informed her before she disappeared down the hall.

Grayson rose and began to pace. Her home was familiar to him, but tonight felt like the first time he’d seen it. He stopped and looked at the framed photographs on a long table, studying each one. It was clear how happy Ryan was with Lexie. He wondered if there was room in their lives for him. Shaking his head, he mentally corrected himself, not in their lives, but in Ryan’s. They couldn’t be a family in the true sense of the word, but he hoped he and Lexie could come to an agreement of sorts to jointly raise Ryan.

He turned when he heard footsteps behind him. Ryan had tear stains down his cheeks, and his shoulders were hunched forward. Not exactly the reaction he’d had earlier, or the one Grayson desperately craved.

“Hi,” Grayson said, kneeling down in front of him.

“So are you really my dad?” Ryan asked softly.

“It looks that way.” Grayson reached out and rubbed Ryan’s arm, searching for a way to touch him without yanking him into his arms like he wanted to do. “But I’d like to know how you feel about that.”

“Okay, I guess,” Ryan sniffled. “I just wanted us to live together, so we could watch the stars every night, and you could show me how to use a knife to cut apples.”

Grayson looked over his head at Lexie, leaning against the doorframe. She was watching them intently, worry lines creased her forehead, and pools of tears glistened in her eyes. His eyes locked with hers, unable to find an answer to the questions between them. She’d hurt him. More than that, she’d betrayed him, and broken his heart with her lack of faith in him. He didn’t see how they could come back from that.

“We’ll buy a telescope for my house too, and you can have your own room there as well as here,” Grayson told him in an attempt to reassure him
.

Ryan nodded his head, and tears rolled down his cheeks. “Yeah,” he said quietly.

Lexie stepped into the room and wrapped her arm around Ryan’s shoulders. “It’s time for bed, sweetie,” she told him, protectively pulling him toward her.

“I’ll see you soon, okay?” Grayson told him, standing up and ruffling the hair on the top of his head.

“Night,” Ryan mumbled, allowing himself to be led back down the hallway.

Grayson poured himself a cup of coffee and sat down at the table to wait for Lexie. He saw her surprise when she came back into the room. “I thought we should talk,” he told her.

She sat down in the seat across from him. “I think it’s just going to take a while for him to fully comprehend all this.” Her eyes, always so expressive, told him she would need time as well.

“We have a lot to work out, but for now, I only want what’s best for Ryan,” he assured her.

“I appreciate that,” she replied.

Silence simmered between them, each lost in their own thoughts. Grayson felt his chest constrict, like the unmentioned elephant in the room had sat directly on his rib cage. He looked up at Lexie, desperate to hold her, yet angry at her that he couldn’t.

“So what do we do now?” She asked.

“I have some business to deal with in Kentucky. I’d like to take Ryan with me for a few weeks, introduce him to my family, and spend some time with him.” Grayson watched her, panic, fear, sadness, anger, all flashed across her face.

“Do you really think that’s the smartest thing to do now?” she snapped. She covered her mouth, seeming surprised at her tone. “Sorry, I just meant, he’s only now learned the truth. Isn’t it a bit soon to introduce him to your family?”

“I don’t think it is, and my trip can’t wait.” Grayson held her gaze. “I’d like my son to meet his grandparents, Lexie.”

He recognized her beginning signs of anger. Her jaw clenched, her eyes sparked, and her shoulders straightened, causing her to sit a bit taller. “Are you telling me you’re taking him with you, or asking me?”

“That depends on your point of view.” Grayson stood from the table and placed his coffee mug in the sink. It wasn’t wasted on either of them how familiar the act was or the hollowness of it now. “I’ll pick him up the day after tomorrow,” he informed her before letting himself out the front door.

Chapter 33

Grayson Hunter had some nerve, Lexie thought to herself as she turned the page of the magazine she’d brought for the plane ride to Kentucky. The look of shock on his face when she’d told him she’d be going as well had given her some joy, but it was short lived. The reality was she would be spending two weeks with a man who didn’t want her, in a house full of strangers. She chose to ignore the fact Grayson’s change of heart was mainly her fault. After all, he was the man with all the secrets. She allowed her anger to be all the justification she needed.

Then, of course, there was Darla Mae Pruitt. She mustn’t forget she’d have the painful task of seeing that vulture hovering over Grayson for two straight weeks.

What else could she have done? Did he really think she would just let him load her son onto an airplane and fly off with him into the sunset? Somebody had to make sure her son would be returned to her, and preferably emotionally unscathed. They’d never been apart from each other and she’d be damned if she wouldn’t be there for him when he could need her most.

She told herself it had nothing at all to do with the fact that she was determined not to let Darla Mae’s claws become embedded in Grayson. Each time her mind went there, she convinced herself it had nothing to do with her, but everything to do with protecting Ryan. She couldn’t allow her son to be raised by that manipulative harlot. Over her dead body, she thought, flipping the page in her magazine with such force the corner ripped off.

Grayson raised his head from the back of the seat and looked over at her, his eyebrow raised in question. She scowled at him and turned the page again, this time with exaggerated care. Ryan tugged at her, pointing excitedly out of the window as the plane cut through the clouds on its descent.

“Look, it’s a mountain,” he told them breathlessly.

Ryan spent the next forty-five minutes with his face pressed to the small round window of the plane. Lexie sat beside him delighted by his excitement, yet feeling her anxiety increase with each minute that passed. By the time they’d touched down, her stomach bubbled with such force she was certain she would be sick.

“I wouldn’t have believed you were a nervous flyer,” Grayson said, obviously noticing her discomfort.

She didn’t respond, but she was grateful he’d believed it was the flying that had her feeling this way. After they’d unloaded from the plane, she slipped into the restroom to pull herself together. Staring at her reflection in the mirror, she was mortified to see she had the same green tinge as the Mr. Yuck stickers on her cleaning products.

Splashing water on her face, she leaned against the sink and took a couple of deep breaths. She was acting ridiculous. The part that bothered her most was that she wasn’t sure exactly why. She could almost believe she was having a premonition of sorts, if she believed in that kind of thing.

“You’re acting like a silly girl,” she told her reflection in the mirror. “You’re acting like you’re going to discover dead bodies buried beneath their barn.”

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