The Sweetness of Tears (35 page)

Author’s Note

The story “The Monkey and the Crocodile” is a tale still told, in many variations and versions, throughout Asia, Africa, and the Middle East, and can be traced back to the
Panchatantra,
an ancient Indian collection of fables written to instruct young princes on the subject of leadership. Scholars have also noted similarities with older stories, such as the Buddhist
Jakata
tales, as well as prior oral traditions.

Child custody laws vary widely in Muslim-majority countries. How they are interpreted and applied depends on the legal system of each state, whether secular or religious. In Pakistan, custody is determined by laws still on the books from the British Raj era and sectarian laws based on the faith of the individuals involved. While there are differences in the interpretation of custody rights among the major schools of Islamic jurisprudence, both within and between Sunni traditions and Shia, in general, maternal custody is favored for the period of early childhood—the definition of which ranges from age two to puberty—while financial responsibility remains a paternal obligation. Common to all the traditional schools of Islamic jurisprudence, preference shifts in favor of paternal custody in cases where the mother remarries. While the events of this novel are fictional and cannot be construed as a definitive representation of the laws of any one country, community, or sect, certain characters express views that are based on an interpretation of Shia (Jafari) jurisprudence, whereby custody may be granted to the paternal grandfather in cases where the father is deceased.

Glossary

Unless otherwise indicated, words are in Urdu.

abaya
(Arabic)—cloak or robe, usually black, worn as an outer garment to veil the shape of a woman’s body; traditionally worn in Arab cultures

abu—
father

abuela
(Spanish)
—
grandmother

achaar—
pickled fruit or vegetable; most often, pickled, unripe mango

alhamdulillah
(Arabic)
—
all praise to God

Allahuma sale ala Muhammad w’ale Muhammad
(Arabic)
—
the
salawat,
which means, “Oh, God, bless Muhammad and the descendants of Muhammad”

amee—
mother

amma—
mother

anna—
a sixteenth of a rupee, unit of currency no longer in use

Arbaeen
(Arabic)
—
Shia holy day, forty days after Ashura, commemorating the end of the Muharram/Safar season for remembrance of the tragedy of Karbala

asalaam alaikum
(Arabic)
—
greeting, may peace be on you

Ashura—
tenth day of the month of Muharram, day of the tragedy of Karbala

azaan—
call to prayer

ayah—
nanny, children’s nurse

baba—
title of affection for a little boy

badaam—
red, waxy-skinned fruit; also almond

baksheesh—
token of thanks, tip

baraf-pani—
lit. ice water; children’s game of freeze tag

barkat—
blessings, abundance

bas—
enough

beta—
son

beti—
daughter

bhabi—
sister-in-law, wife of brother; also used for wife of friend

bhai—
brother

bibi
(Swahili)
—
grandmother

bibi—
lady; affectionate style of address rather than formal

biryani—
rice dish cooked with spices and meat or vegetables

buddhi ka baal—
lit. old-lady hair; term for cotton candy

burkha—
head-to-toe garment for women, covering face and hair

cachumber—
a chopped salad, eaten aside the main meal, made of onions, tomatoes, cucumbers, green chilis, vinegar/lemon juice, cilantro, and salt

chaat—
savory, sour, spicy snacks

chacha—
uncle, father’s brother

chadar—
lit. sheet; seamless cloth covering for hair and body but not the face

chai—
tea

chakr—
dizziness

chakram—
fool, dizzy-headed person

Chehlum—
Shia holy day, forty days after Ashura,
commemorating the end of the Muharram/Safar season of remembrance of Karbala

chola—
spicy and sour salad made with chick peas

chowkidar—
watchman, guard

chutney—
dipping sauce

dada—
paternal grandfather

dadi—
paternal grandmother

dard—
pain

dho—
two

dho pyaza—
meat dish made with double the normal amount of onions

dupatta—
long scarf, standard accessory for women’s dress

ehsaan—
obligation, social debt, to owe favors

ek—
one

fajr—
dawn; dawn prayer

faqa—
half-day fast observed on Ashura

ghazals
—poetic form in the Middle East and South Asia
consisting of rhyming couplets with repeating refrains, usually expressing the pain of loss or separation and the beauty to be found in that pain

hai—
lamentation, “Alas!”

hakim—
traditional healer

halal—
term for what is lawful in Islam, most often used in terms of dietary restrictions, specifically with regard to meat and poultry, whereby animals must be treated humanely (offered water, etc.), and the name of God is invoked before specific slaughtering methods, which are the same as those found in Jewish kosher tradition

hijab—
head scarf covering all of the hair

humdard—
lit. us-pain; one who shares one’s pain

huzn
(Arabic)—sorrow or sadness, a tone which professional reciters of the Quran aspire to express

ifthar—
sunset meal to break the day’s fast during Ramzan

Illahi—
God

imam—
religious leader or teacher; one who leads prayer

Imam—
for Shias, one of the spiritual successors to the Prophet

imam zamin—
armband for special occasions, with money sewn inside for charity

Independence—
end of the British Raj in the Indian Subcontinent, establishment of the nation-states of India and Pakistan

Innalillahi, wa inaa ilayhi rajiuna bi-qaz’aa-ihee, wa tasleeman li-amrihee
(Arabic)
—
“We belong to God and unto God we will return; we are happy with the will of God and carry out the command of God”

Inshallah
(Arabic)
—
God willing

jamun—
purplish red, ovoid-shaped fruit

jora—
lit. pair or set; used for an outfit of clothing

juloos—
procession, demonstration

jungle jalebi—
fruit in a spiral, twisty pod, similar to tamarind but lighter in color and blander in flavor

jurwa—
twin

kabab—
meat dish—ground or cubed, roasted, grilled, or fried

kameez—
long tunic, traditionally very long; for women, length varies according to fashion

khalifa
(Arabic)
—
caliph; secular and religious leader who is in succession to the leadership of the Prophet

khorma—
curried meat or chicken dish

Khudahafiz—
good-bye; God be with you

kilona-walla—
toy man, hawker of toys

kismat—
luck, fate, destiny

kulfi—
ice cream, usually flavored with cardamom

kurtha—
loose, long tunic

la
(Arabic)
—
no

lola
(Tagalog)
—
grandmother

ma—
mother

macee—
mother’s sister in some subcontinental dialects

madrassa
(Arabic)
—
school

majlis—
gathering or congregation

marsia—
mournful, harmonious dirge for the remembrance of Karbala

masaib—
tragedy

masala—
spices

Mashallah
(Arabic)
—
by the grace of God

masjid—
mosque

masloom—
victim of oppression or injustice

matham—
ritual grieving in the form of self-flagellation to mourn the tragedy of Karbala—most typical form being an open-handed thumping of the chest

meher—
prenuptial settlement given to the bride

mehfil—
gathering hall

mehndi—
henna; prenuptial ceremony when henna is applied in intricate patterns to the hands and feet of the bride and her female friends and relatives

mubarak—
congratulations, felicitations on a happy occasion

muezzin—
the one who gives the
azaan,
the call to prayer

Muharram—
first month of the Islamic calendar (the Islamic calendar being lunar and unaligned or adjusted, so that it slides backward in relation to the Western calendar approximately ten days each year)

mullah—
religious preacher or scholar

mushk—
water bag

mut’a—
temporary marriage

naan—
slightly leavened bread, usually baked in a clay oven

namak—
salt

namaz—
prayer

nikkah—
Muslim wedding ceremony

nikkah-nama—
wedding document indicating prenuptial
agreements, such as gift to the bride, and conditions of
marriage, etc.

noha—
mournful, rhythmic dirge to accompany the beating of the chest (
matham
) ritual in remembrance of Karbala

oof—
an expressive utterance indicating dismay or displeasure

paan—
betel nut wrapped in leaf, spread with lime paste and
assorted flavorings

pakora—
deep-fried fritters, often made with vegetables, battered in lentil flour

pallo—
loose end of a
sari,
typically worn over the shoulder or drawn over the head

Partition—
the division of the Indian Subcontinent at the time of Independence from the British into the nations of India and Pakistan (East and West, the former of which later became Bangladesh)

phupi—
aunt, father’s sister

phupijan—
aunt dear,
jan
being a term of endearment—“dear” or “darling”

pyas—
thirst

Raj—
rule, as in British Raj or Rule

Ramzan
(in Arabic,
Ramadan
)
—
the ninth month of the Islamic calendar, the month of fasting

rickshaw—
motor tricycle taxi

roza—
lit. day; the word for the Ramzan fast, abstaining from food and drink from sunrise to sunset

rupee—
currency note in Pakistan, India

sabeel—
lit. spring; refreshments offered to pilgrims and
mourners in commemoration of Karbala

sabzi mandi—
vegetable market

sadhu—
ascetic, one who renounces worldly life

Safar—
the second month of the Islamic calendar

sajda—
position of prostration in prayer, forehead to ground

salaam—
greeting, peace

salan—
curry

salawat—
call for blessings on the Prophet and his descendants

samosa—
triangular, pastry-wrapped pocket of meat or
vegetables, fried as snack or appetizer

sari—
woman’s clothing comprised of yards of fabric wrapped and pleated over an underskirt and blouse

sayt—
boss, master

shaami kabab—
lightly fried kabab made of ground meat and lentils, battered in egg

shaheed—
martyr; one who bears witness

shalwar—
loose, baggy pants for men and women

shalwar kameez—
outfit comprised of loose, baggy pants and matching tunic top

sharbat—
sweet, cold drink, often made with milk and nuts

Shia—
follower of the sect of Islam that traces the spiritual
succession to the Prophet down from his cousin, Ali;
minority sect in Islam

Sunni—
follower of the sect of Islam that follows the tradition of the Prophet and accepts the spiritual leadership of the first four caliphs as successors to the Prophet; majority sect in Islam

tasbeeh—
prayer beads, rosary

teek heh—
it’s okay; it’s all right

tonga—
two-wheeled horse carriage

ummi
(Arabic)
—
mother

Wahabbi—
follower of eighteenth-century Abd al-Wahab; a term, often used pejoratively, for a conservative religious worldview intolerant of anything contrary to what is
considered a purist view of Islam, including Shia practices and beliefs and Sufi practices. A prevalent form of Islam in Saudi Arabia, Wahabbi ideology has been exported elsewhere, fueled by oil money, in the form of schools and missionary work

wàipó
(Mandarin Chinese)
—
maternal grandmother

ya
(Arabic)
—
oh

yalla
(Arabic)
—
expression for “let’s go,” or “come on”

zakir—
one who remembers, male; in Shia, Indo-Pakistani usage: one who remembers and recounts the story of Karbala

zakira—
one who remembers, female; in Shia, Indo-Pakistani
usage: one who remembers and recounts the story of Karbala

zanjeer ka matham—
ritual grieving, self-flagellation in
commemoration of Karbala, involving chains and blades

ziarat—
pilgrimage; offering a spiritual salute to the departed, whether in person at the grave or through recitation and prayer