The Sinner (19 page)

A
lex did not remember his wedding night.

God help him, he was a bastard. A useless man. A poor excuse for a husband. And his head hurt like the devil.
Oh, Jesus, take me now.
What had he been thinking?

His mouth was dry, he had sand in his eyes, and he was still drunk, but he had this blinding headache. And worst of all was the sinking feeling in his stomach that came from knowing he had fooked up badly. As awful as he felt, he rolled over toward his bride, intending to make up for his lack of attention with a bout of morning lovemaking.

He stretched his arm out and felt around. But his bride was not in the bed.

Alex crawled out of bed and poured the pitcher of water into the basin. He splashed water on his face, and when that did not do the job, he stuck his head in the basin and closed his eyes. God’s bones, he felt ill. And it was going to get worse.

Alex spent the next hour searching the castle high and low for Glynis—while trying to avoid telling anyone that he had already lost his wife. He finally found her in one of the boats pulled up on the shore. She was sitting as straight as an arrow with her arms crossed over her chest, a grim look on her face, and her eyes fixed on the sea.

Glynis did not turn to look at him as he climbed into the boat.

“What are ye doing here?” he asked after a while.

“I’m waiting to leave,” she said. “I want to put our wedding night behind me as soon as possible.”

He had slept through his wedding night. God help him, because the bedding was the only part about being a husband that Alex had been certain he could do well.

Glynis just sat there with her arms folded and her mouth clamped shut again. At least she didn’t shout and throw things like his mother. He considered pointing out to her that their
true
wedding night had been after they had made their vows alone to each other—and he’d acquitted himself quite well. But he thought better of it.

Just when he thought she might never speak again, Glynis said, “Ye never told me where we will live.”

“Well, that is something I wanted to discuss with ye.”

“Don’t pretend I have a choice, and ye haven’t already decided,” she said with her gaze still fixed on the horizon.

He drew in a deep breath and reminded himself that she was used to having her opinions ignored. Perhaps this gave him an opportunity to make up lost ground.

“My father’s lands will be mine one day, so there is good reason for us to live there.” Alex thought her back went stiffer, though he didn’t see how that was possible. “But Connor needs a man to go to North Uist, where our clansmen have been living at the mercy of his pirating uncles.”

Alex wanted to go there. Fighting the pirates appealed to him, of course, and living with either of his parents was his own vision of hell. But even more than that, he wanted to take on the responsibility of securing North Uist for his clan.

“Before I left, I told Connor that when I returned I would go live on North Uist and bring order to the island,” he said. “But that was before I had a wife and daughter to consider. ’Tis far more dangerous there than on my father’s lands, so I’m inclined to ask Connor to send Duncan instead.”

Glynis slanted her eyes at him. “I’m no frail lass, like the sort ye knew at court or in France.”

“I didn’t say ye were, but ye are my responsibility now.”

“North Uist is a short sail from Barra, so I doubt it’s any more dangerous,” she said. “And if ye needed help fighting, my father would send men.”

If he had to have a wife, praise God she was a fearless lass. Still, he wanted to be honest with her about what awaited them there.

“Our clan has an old castle there, Dunfaileag, that should provide sufficient protection once it is repaired,” he said. “But it will take a good deal of work before it is either comfortable or secure.”

“I like to be busy,” she said. “And have ye forgotten I traveled to Edinburgh and back sleeping outdoors on the hard ground?”

“Nay, I haven’t forgotten a single night.” He met her eyes and gave her a smile that made her blush. He was glad for the opportunity to remind her that he knew how to please her under the blankets when he wasn’t dead drunk.

“I could see my family more often,” she said. “Please, Alex, I want to go.”

Praise God.

“My parents are expecting us, so we’ll have to pay them a visit on the way,” he said. “But then we’ll sail for North Uist.”

Glynis finally gave him a smile. They’d had a civil conversation and come to an agreement on an important matter without a fuss or fight. It bode well for the future.

Alex didn’t want to mention her former husband, but North Uist had one other advantage over Skye—it was further away from the Clanranald chieftain’s base at Castle Tioram.

“We took this boat from Hugh Dubh when we removed him from Dunscaith Castle,” Alex said, patting the rail. “How did ye know this was the one Connor wanted me to take?”

“Ilysa told me.”

Of course. Alex looked down the length of the boat. It was a full-size war galley, so Connor also had to give up the eighteen men it took to row it.

“I’ll need a war galley on North Uist,” Alex said, reconciling himself to it. He leaned his elbows on the rail to admire Shaggy’s boat, which was looking so pretty sitting out on the water. “Shame about losing that sweet little galley.”

“If I hear another word about that galley, which didn’t belong to ye in the first place,” Glynis said, “I swear I’ll set fire to it.”

And Alex had prided himself that he understood women. He had no idea why mention of Shaggy’s boat should upset her. Fortunately, he saw Ilysa making her way down to the shore with Sorcha and Bessie. Deciding it was best to let Glynis calm down, Alex went to meet them.

“I didn’t have a chance to tell ye before,” Ilysa said, when he reached them. “Teàrlag gave me a message for ye.”

“Wait in the boat for me, Sorcha.” Judging from past experience, Teàrlag’s message would not be something he wanted his daughter to hear. After Sorcha skipped off with Bessie, he said, “Teàrlag couldn’t wait to admonish me in person?”

“No admonishments this time,” Ilysa said, smiling. “She sends blessings on your marriage.”

“So that’s how ye knew to have enough food and drink on hand for a feast,” Alex said. “Thank ye for that.”

Connor had no notion of all that Ilysa did. Though she was young, Connor would never find a wife who could keep the castle half so well.
Cha bhi fios aire math an tobair gus an tràigh e.
The value of the well is not known until it goes dry.

“Teàrlag did say to remind ye that she was correct about the three women,” Ilysa said, “and about the gift being special and bright as a moonbeam.”

Alex glanced over his shoulder at his wee daughter, whose hair was the color of moonbeams and whose name meant “radiant.” “Aye, she is a special gift.”

“And the three women?” Ilysa asked.

“Three did require my help, though I can’t say any of them gave me a choice about giving it,” he said. “Glynis threatened me, Sorcha’s mother sailed off without her, and I couldn’t very well let the other one drown.”

Ilysa laughed. “I suppose not.”

“As Teàrlag predicted, one brought deceit and another danger,” he said, and his heart missed a beat as he thought of how he could have lost Sorcha. Attempting to regain his light tone, he said, “And I’m hoping my new bride will fulfill a few of my deepest desires tonight.”

Ilysa gave him a soft smile and touched his arm. “Open your heart to Glynis.”

“And why should I take advice from Duncan’s baby sister?” Alex asked.

“Because, while some say ye got a better woman than ye deserve,” Ilysa said, “I believe ye can be as good a man as ye want to be, Alexander Bàn MacDonald.”

Sorcha leaned against her father and waved good-bye to Dunscaith Castle as they sailed away. She missed the little red-haired girls already. Though they made lots of funny sounds, they had only one word between them. Sorcha didn’t mind that they screamed it over and over—
Da! Da!
—because it made them so happy.

But she was disappointed she did not get to see the warrior queen her father told her about.

Unless her new mother was the warrior queen. Glynis dressed like the other women, but Sorcha could imagine her fighting with a great sword.

She felt safe with Glynis.

G
lynis intended to stay angry with Alex for a very long time.

Of course, having her husband sleep through their wedding night was a vast improvement over her first wedding night. Ach, Magnus was a disgusting, selfish pig both in and out of bed.

Glynis felt herself softening toward Alex as she watched him at the rudder, with Sorcha on his lap, pointing out landmarks on the shore and the small islands they passed. Alex had such an easy, generous nature. As her curiosity overcame her stubbornness, she inched her way along the rail until she was close enough to hear what Alex was saying.

“That is where your grandmother lives,” Alex said, pointing to a two-story house on an offshore island to their right. Then he pointed to an older, larger fortified house a short distance up the coast on their left. “And that is your grandfather’s, which is where we’ll be staying.”

Sorcha tugged at his arm and held up two fingers.

“Why do they have two houses?” Alex paused for a long moment before he answered. “They needed room for all their friends.”

Glynis should have taken that as a warning.

Alex’s mother and father had an earlier start from Dunscaith and were both waiting in the hall for them. As the serving women came in and out with drinks and platters of food, they gave Alex overly friendly greetings. Not one of them was old or unattractive.

This household was altogether too much like Clanranald’s. It made Glynis physically ill to be here. Although Alex’s jokes and laughing remarks were not as blatant as Magnus’s pinches and squeezes, his relationship with several of the women was clear, nonetheless.

Glynis was rapidly losing her appreciation for her new husband’s generous nature.

“Hello, Anna,” Alex called out to a buxom redhead, who winked at him. “You’re looking well, Brigid,” he said to the dark-haired beauty who made a point of brushing up against his shoulder when she brought him a cup of ale.

Sweat broke out on Glynis’s palms as she fought another wave of nausea. She fixed her gaze on the far wall and held on to the table as she got to her feet.

“I’d like to get settled in my chamber, if someone will show me where it is.”

“Here we are,” Alex said, as he opened the door for Glynis and Sorcha.

It felt strange to be in his old bedchamber, and stranger still to be settling his new family in it. From the time he was old enough to sail on his own, he had spent as little time here as possible. He was always off having adventures—or getting into trouble, depending on your point of view—with Connor, Ian, and Duncan. He’d made himself a regular guest at both Dunscaith and Ian’s house.

Sorcha went to the window to look out, and Glynis looked everywhere but at him. Alex glanced at the small bed. His feet would hang off the end, but Glynis could not avoid him in a bed that size. He was desperate to have some time alone with her—both in and out of bed. He would ask his mother to take Sorcha to sleep with her.

He was pleased then when his mother appeared in the doorway.

“Do ye have what ye need?” she asked.

Though his mother had moved out years ago, she always assumed the role of hostess the moment she stepped foot into his father’s house. Before Alex could ask her about changing the sleeping arrangements, his mother forged ahead with what she had come to tell them.

“Our clansmen on this side of Skye didn’t get word in time to come to the wedding feast at Dunscaith.” She clasped her hands together and beamed at them. “So I’ve invited them all here tonight for another wedding feast!”

Alex was furious with his mother. The last thing he needed tonight was a second wedding feast.

“That was kind of ye,” Glynis said, but she had gone pale as death. “I’m a wee bit tired from all the…excitement…of last night. So if ye don’t mind taking Sorcha, I’d like to take a rest.”

“I could use a lie down myself,” Alex said, feeling hopeful.

“I’m sure ye can find a bed somewhere,” Glynis said, giving him a look that would sour milk.

“What in the hell have ye done, Mother?” Alex demanded, as they went down the stairs. “Ye should have asked me before inviting everyone.”

“I wanted to make your wife and daughter feel welcome,” his mother said, smiling down at Sorcha.

Alex was not appeased by his mother’s professed good intensions. Both his parents always did precisely as they wanted with no thought to anyone else. The deed was done, however, so tonight would be spent entertaining every man, woman, and child within a half day’s journey of his father’s house.

A short while later, he was sitting in the hall contemplating his grim future with a cup of ale when his parents’ voices pierced his thoughts. When he turned, he saw his daughter squeezing the life out of her old doll as she looked back and forth between his parents.

“I don’t care what ye say,” his mother said, leaning forward with her hands on her hips. “I’m taking Sorcha home with me tonight.”

“Ye will no take my granddaughter out of this house,” his father shouted.

His parents were far too engrossed in their argument to notice Sorcha was watching them with eyes as big as platters. Alex stormed over and picked up his daughter. When she leaned against him with her thumb in her mouth, he brushed her hair back and kissed her forehead.

“I won’t have this,” he said to his parents, who had paused long enough to look at him. “The two of ye will get along in my daughter’s presence, or ye will not see her.”

His parents spoke over each other. “But she is my only grandchild!” “You’ve no right!”

“I do have the right,” Alex said, fixing his gaze on each of his parents in turn. “And I will no allow ye to fight over her the way ye did with me.”

Alex had never voiced his feelings about their fighting before, and they were both—for once—too shocked to speak. He supposed that was often the way of it with families. The obvious truths were never spoken aloud, as if that somehow made them less true.

“I won’t tell ye again,” he said. “If ye can’t be civil to each other in front of my daughter, we’ll leave and we won’t come back.”

Things were going from bad to worse. Ach, why did Mary have to come to the feast?

Alex felt lower than dirt as he greeted her husband. Now that he was a husband himself, he saw the whole situation quite differently. Mary’s husband was a sniveling ass, but that did not excuse Alex taking his wife to bed. Alex would kill any man who did the same to him. The mere thought of another man’s hands on Glynis sent murder roiling through his veins.

Through seven courses, Mary tried to catch Alex’s eye. Alex steadfastly ignored her and tried his best to converse with Glynis.

“I’m sorry for all the guests tonight,” he said, leaning close to Glynis’s ear.

“Why would ye be sorry?” she said, her back as stiff as a board. “Is it me or your daughter that ye are ashamed to have them meet?”

Alex clenched his jaw to keep from shouting at her.

“Ye know damned well I’m no ashamed of either of ye,” he said, when he could manage to speak in a low voice. “Can ye no meet me halfway and attempt to be pleasant?”

“If ye wanted a pleasant wife, ye should have picked someone else,” she said in a fierce whisper. “I warned ye from the start about my sour disposition.”

With that, Glynis turned her back on him to talk to his mother, who sat on her other side. Ach! His head was already pounding when Mary got up and gave him a broad wink over her shoulder as she left the hall. Damn it, at least he could put a stop to that.

He waited in the vestibule for Mary to come back from the privy. When she came in and saw him, she broke into a wide smile.

“Alex—”

“Quiet!” He grabbed Mary by the wrist and hauled her outside into the dark courtyard. As soon as he had her around the corner of the house where they couldn’t be seen from the door, he jerked her around to face him.

“So ye did miss me,” she said and started to run her palm up his chest.

“What in the hell are ye doing, Mary?” he said, pushing her hand away. “I brought ye out here to tell ye to stop this foolishness before my wife notices.”

“Frankly, your bride doesn’t look as if she’d care one way or the other.”

“She would,” Alex said, though he was beginning to doubt it himself. “She just isn’t as obvious in her attentions as some.”

Mary gave a light laugh. “Indeed.”

“I want ye to go home now and don’t come back,” he said, keeping his voice low.

“Where do ye want to meet, then?” she asked.

“Keep your voice down,” he hissed. “Ye are no understanding me. I’m a married man now, and I’ve no intention of starting another affair with ye—or anyone else.”

“Ye know what they say about good intentions,” Mary said with a smile in her voice.

“I mean it, Mary,” Alex said. “I don’t want to make trouble for ye, but I will if I have to.”

“I was made for trouble.” She laughed and leaned against him.

“I’m warning ye,” he said, pushing her away from him by her shoulders. “Take your husband and go home.”

Alex left her standing alone in the dark and stomped up the steps of the house. God in Heaven, what had he seen in such a woman?

Glynis was certain everyone in the hall was laughing at her behind their hands. All evening, that woman named Mary had been glancing and winking at Alex. Mary’s husband must be half blind, but there was nothing wrong with Glynis’s eyesight. When Alex and Mary both disappeared, Glynis should have had too much pride to follow them—but she simply could not stay in her seat. She had to know for certain that Alex had truly gone to meet a lover on the second night of their marriage.

When she stepped out into the vestibule and saw neither of them, her chest felt too tight. Though Glynis had feared Alex had left with the woman, she had wanted to be proven wrong. Still, she told herself she must not judge him without actually seeing him with the wretched woman. There were only two places one could go from the vestibule—outside or up the stairs to the bedchambers.

Glynis could not face finding them in a bedchamber, so she slipped out the front door, taking care to not make a sound. As she eased the door closed behind her, she heard a murmur of voices. She followed the sound down the steps to the corner of the house.

Her heart sank as she recognized the low rumble of Alex’s voice. Though he was speaking too low for her to make out his words, Glynis had no trouble hearing the woman.

“Where do ye want to meet, then?” Mary asked.

Nay, this could not be happening. Glynis squeezed her eyes shut and took openmouthed breaths, trying to gain control. Somehow, she had to go back inside without looking as if she’d had her guts sliced open and ripped from her body like a caught fish.

“I was made for trouble” was the last thing Glynis heard. The words rang in her ears as she stumbled blindly to the door.

Now she knew what Alex’s “usual sort” of woman was like—she was the kind who was soft and easy and incited a man’s lust.

A woman made for trouble.