The Secret to Success (15 page)

Although I had been out of school the last three years and had no proof of any academic progress, my work in the community and the church preceded me, so I wasn't surprised when my advisor reinstated me. She probably figured that I had matured during my extended vacation and that I would make better decisions the second time around. She was right. I managed to finish the school year with a 3.5 G.P.A. I owe at lot of my success that school year to Lois. I knew Lois had the secrets to academic success and all I had to do was sit at her feet and learn her system. Like MJ, I knew once I learned the new system, there was no stopping me.

The following advice is a result of my conversation with Lois Clay and my personal observation of Michael Jordan:

Get support.

One of the first mistakes I made as a freshman was playing individual ball. I knew I needed help but I was too embarrassed to ask for it. Other students made it seem like getting help was for people who were slow. When I struggled in a class, I just kept it to myself and as a result, I failed. I wasn't going to make that mistake the second time around. In fact, I needed more help this time because I was living off campus and working full-time so resources were not as readily available. Like Mike relied on Phil Jackson, I too relied heavily on my advisor and other faculty to help me devise a game plan to overcome my past defeats. They kept me informed about meetings, study tables, scholarships, and special events that were offered for education majors.

Set up the Triangle Offense.

I saw how effective the peer-to-peer learning experience was from my time with my G.E.D. students. As a result, the first week of class I intentionally identified two other students in each class I could study with. Like MJ, I wasn't interested in putting it all on my shoulders anymore - I needed some help. It just so happened that Frank Dent, T. Black, and I had classes together. Frank was a beast when it came to test taking. He could break a lesson down in story form and give it an acronym like nobody's business. T. Black was a beast at organizing and scheduling study times. Between the two of them I went from getting a 1.3 G.P.A the semester I was dismissed to a 3.5 G.P.A. both fall and spring semester. Besides the grades, I was more motivated to study when we did it in a group and I felt more compelled to do well because we compared grades at the end of each test. I didn't want to be the one with a C+ when they had the A. Like Mike, I now had great teammates and I wasn't afraid to utilize their skills.

Add weapons to your game.

When MJ entered the league he was known for his highflying dunks that electrified the crowd. While fun and exciting to watch, that style didn't lead to any championships. It wasn't until he added some less exciting but equally lethal weapons to his game that he began to win, and win big. Developing a post game, 3-point shot, and a turn-around jumper, were the things that allowed him to become a champion and the greatest player ever. In the end, the dunks and circus moves just turned out to be icing on the cake. Like MJ, I too wanted greatness so it was time for me to add some new, less exciting, but equally effective weapons. I added the following weapons:

1. Utilizing resources

Taking advantage of the campus resources was one of the ways I made adjustments to my academic game. I sought out a mentor. Kenny Anderson was among many of them. He schooled me on the whole college culture. He said it was like anything else - you have to learn the game so you can successfully compete. That advice helped me get a full scholarship that year. I shared with several of the faculty my work in the community and my short and long term plan with my degree and before I knew it, Dr. Frazier said he would do all in his power to help me get my degree. Lois also shared with me the importance of knowing your professor, which was highly possible at a small school. Some of them attended the same church, shopped at the same stores and were advisors to many of the student driven organizations so there were plenty opportunities to connect with them. There were the traditional office hours in which you could meet with the teacher outside of the regularly scheduled class time. I found office hours extremely helpful, especially in the classes I struggled in.

2. Maintaining a balance

Maintaining a balance was another secret Lois taught me. I always wondered how she maintained such a high G.P.A. and graduated magna cum laude. When I paid closer attention, I picked up on her secret. Whenever there was a function, she would devote the first few minutes to her studies. Instead of waiting for the fashionably late people to show up, she studied in the meantime. And when everything was wrapping up, she did not just sit there, she cracked open her book. It was like she was always waiting for an opportunity to study. Between academics, work, family, and social commitments it was important for me to find a way to balance those competing demands. Creating a schedule was key to my success. I hated writing things down, it was frustrating to try to keep up with a pen and planner but it worked. There is nothing magical about a planner, it works because it helps you organize all your tasks and it keeps you accountable.

3. Establishing a routine time to study for each class

One of the things I learned from teaching the G.E.D. program was the importance of consistency. My students did better when we stuck to a routine and it was important that I incorporate that principal as well. Homework was another point I drove home. I taught my students that class was just the warm up. They would not dare play in a big basketball game or football game without warming up or practicing before the game. The same was true with learning. What I taught in the classroom was the appetizer not the entrée. If they really wanted to pass the G.E.D. test, the real work did not begin until they studied away from class. I told them that for every hour they spend in class, they needed to study two hours outside of class. I incorporated that strategy into my game plan as well. I made sure my routine consisted of studying for each subject at the same time and even the same place. My study routine also included more than just doing the assignment. I reviewed my notes from class, and even studied the syllabus daily to see where I was and how far I had to go. If I had spare time once I went through my entire routine, I would prepare for all my classes as if there was going to be a pop quiz. And as a former procrastinator, I always had to remind myself not to put off what I could do today.

4. Discovering my learning style

By discovering my learning style I was able to study effectively rather than just “winging it.” After taking a learning style test, I found out that my learning style was:

Verbal/Linguistic Intelligence

Has the ability to use words and language
. These learners have highly developed auditory skills and are generally elegant speakers. They think in words rather than pictures.

Their skills include:

Listening, speaking, writing, story telling, explaining, teaching, using humor, understanding the syntax and meaning of words, remembering information, convincing someone of their point of view, analyzing language usage.

Possible career interests:

Poet, journalist, writer, teacher, lawyer, politician, translator

Take the time to research the learning style that works best for you. Trust me; it makes a world of difference.

5. Take care of your body

Most students do not realize how connected their diet is to their academic life. I had to learn the hard way that studying on four hours of sleep and an empty stomach or junk-food was a sure fire way to keep you struggling academically. I realized getting 6 to 8 hours of sleep, drinking 8 glasses of water a day and exercising helped me immensely when it came time to study. I had more energy, could study longer hours in one setting, and I retained more information. During test weeks I avoided fast food, ate more fruit and vegetables and stopped drinking soda because it had so much sugar and caffeine.

Summary: Points for Academic Success

•   Get support.

•   Set up the triangle offense.

•   Add weapons to your game.

•   Utilizing resources.

•   Maintaining a balance.

•   Establishing a routine time to study for each class.

•   Discovering your learning style.

•   Taking care of your body.

My return to college in the fall of 95' proved to be my best academic year ever. I made the Dean's list for the first time in my college career without the help of any remedial courses and I raised my cumulative G.P.A. Things were going great! Based on my conversation with my advisor, I was projected to graduate with my degree in Education May ‘97. I could taste it and I wanted it as bad as I wanted to breathe. In the midst of all my success, I kept telling myself, “…it's just too good to be true.” I wasn't trying to jinx myself; I just had a hard time believing I was finally over the hump. I felt like the Evans family on the T.V. show
Good Times
. Whenever it looked like they got a big break and were finally on their way out of the ghetto, something bad happened. I must have been a distant relative of the Evan's family because it seemed as though I couldn't catch a break, or when I finally did, something would happen to derail it.

Case in point, when I found out I was being reinstated, I knew I couldn't afford the tuition. So, I prayed and asked God to bless me and he came through in a major way. I am not sure how it all happened. One minute I was meeting with a financial-aid counselor, and the next minute someone sends me to Trevor Frazier's office, the master of Pastorial Studies at Oakwood, and he gave me a full scholarship. At that time, I had a 1.7 G.P.A. Talk about a miracle! Later, I heard through the grapevine that he was leaving the University at the end of the school year to pursue his PhD. That could only mean one thing: no Frazier, no scholarship. I thought to myself,
“…here we go again.”
This made me question whether I wasted an entire year sitting in class instead of developing myself as a speaker. What about graduation? What about my career? How am I supposed to take care of my family? I loved the community work I was doing but it didn't generate income and although the speaking engagements were picking up, it wasn't steady income either. It was a blessing that De had started her career but we were so swamped with old bills the money was spent before her checks even came in. It felt like someone knocked the wind out of me. Once again I was at a point in my life where I needed to make a decision. Was I going to let the bad news get the best of me and destroy the momentum I built or was I going to take the lemons life was throwing at me and make lemonade? I would be lying if I said it didn't hurt because it did. So I acknowledged the hurt, went through the whole gamut of emotions, and then moved on.

A Setback is a Setup for a Comeback

After the disappointment of my scholarship not being continued, I got a major break. Kenny Anderson called me and asked if I could present the work I was doing with high school dropouts at the Southeast Center for Human Relations' National Conference on Race & Ethnicity in American Higher Education (NCORE) in Atlanta. The invitation was huge because NCORE didn't invite me. In fact, they didn't even know my program existed. Kenny was the one they invited and he was willing to give me ten minutes of his time. He invited me because he wanted those in attendance to see that there were young black men doing positive things in the community and that the media should spend just as much time highlighting stories like mine as they do the negative stories. I thought the best way to utilize the opportunity was to let two or three of the G.E.D. students speak directly to how the program impacted their lives. One of the girls was a teenage mom who had received her G.E.D., got a job and was in college. Another was a young man who was previously in and out of jail and in gangs and had now turned his life around. After I spoke, the place went bananas and my career as a public speaker took off. At least three high profile engagements came out of that one invitation and created the momentum that I am still riding to this day. The first invitation was from Dr. Eric Abercrombie who invited me to speak at University of Cincinnati's Black Man Think Tank. The second invitation was from the director of Diversity magazine. He invited me to be a guest on their annual teleconference. The third invitation came from Mrs. Juanita Smith. She invited me to speak at Florida A & M's Black Student Retention Conference. After that, the calls started pouring in. There were two engagements specifically that meant the world to me. The first was an invitation by Dr. Joseph McMillan, founder of the Black Family Conference at the University of Louisville. Dr. Mac invited me back every year and he and the Black Family Conference staff adopted me as one of their own. The second invitation would change my life forever. It was from Rodney Patterson and Murray Edwards of Michigan State University.

I broke into the speaking circuit and was finally able to make a living doing what I loved but I knew I wouldn't be satisfied. This wasn't the entire vision, just part of it.

University of Cincinnati

Dr. Eric Abercrombie founded the Black Man Think Tank. I still get goose bumps just thinking about my first standing ovation before a huge crowd. There were approximately 1,800 professionals in attendance. When I walked on stage, all I could see was the stage light shining in my face. I kept telling myself to relax. Just like we rehearsed, all you have to do is remember how we rehearsed it and it will all be fine. I specifically requested a lapel microphone so I could be free to move around and use my body as a prop. It was the fastest eight minutes of my life. As soon as I finished my last words everyone in the room started clapping and one by one stood to their feet. As I exited the stage, I passed by a mirror, I stopped, looked at myself and thought, “I am proud of you, they gave you a shot and you nailed it.” During the intermission, I went out in the lobby for a meet and greet. I passed out a ton of business cards and received about ten other speaking engagement offers. None was more meaningful than the offer to speak at Michigan State University. The thought of leaving Detroit as a homeless, high school dropout and returning home to lecture at one of Michigan's finest institutions was overwhelming.