The Rock Star Next Door, a Modern Fairytale (16 page)

Meanwhile, she had to deal with Lex.

Shocked by his unexpected proposal of marriage, Jessie looked about her room in a daze. She wished she could just live for the moment, embrace life, as Jack repeatedly told her. He was the one who jumped into everything with both feet, ignoring the risks, and Jessie was the one to pull Jack back, out of harm’s way. 

The day was overcast, with crisp winds blowing along the Malibu shoreline. Jessie pulled a gray Bucky Badger sweatshirt over her head, freed her hair from beneath the collar, and gazed at her reflection in the mirror.  If only that reflection could talk,
advise her, like a twin sister and
tell her ragged emotions which course to take.

After spending the greater part of three weeks with him, being constantly together, she could honestly say Alexander Coltrane was everything she’d hoped to find in a man. Lex was no more the predatory male of his st
age
persona than
Heath Ledger
would have been The Joker off the Batman set.

His stage image wasn’t the problem. What worried Jessie were the realities and pressures of life in this golden city of the rich and famous. Both of them were Rockers, with concert t
ours and contracts to keep,
exuberant fans and paparazzi wanting to intrude upon their private life. The medi
a relentlessly
s
talked celebrity unions and the stars always claimed it
ruined their marriage.

Out here on the west coast people didn’t stay married for thirty years, like the farmers and factory laborers from her native Wisconsin. Stars married and divorced and
married again without batting an eye, moving from one grand passion t
o another like a country
dance.

Jessie couldn’t image such a thing. 
She was a product of her upbringing in
the
Midwest. Hadn’t Dad stayed with Mom through hell, high water and mental illness? They were still married. Everyone else in the vicinity had fled Mom’s craziness, cut off all ties with her, even her own sister. And yet, Dad stayed. Until death do us part; that was his motto, his creed. He was in it for the long haul. 

Jessie wanted that kind of love, that kind of dedication. Maybe she was too conventional, too old fashioned. But, when she uttered
thos
e sacred vows, she intended
it would be forever.
Not for the cameras, not for a publicity stunt. Not on a whim.

Perhaps Kyra was right, she was looking for something that no longer existed;
happily ever after.
Did it belong in the last century?
 
Perhaps she should just live for the moment, as Jack was always telling her.

Jack.
Her brother would tell her to stop making excuses and
follow her heart, Jessie mused as she tied her tennis shoes so she could take Duncan for his daily walk along the beach. Yet, Jack’s heart wouldn’t be the one that shattered into a thousand pieces when Lex decided he’d found another soul mate and cast her aside just as quickly. 

This was too easy. Way too easy, her gut told her. It was just too simple and too fast.

S
urely if we were meant to be together there would be some
struggle, some opposition,
some
overwhelming
obstacle
to be overcome, just like in the good
romances
?

She scrubbed the top of her head with her palm as if
to clear the questi
ons bouncing about
inside it
, took one last look at her appearance
in the mirror, and steeled herself to meet the man downstairs.

She loved being with Lex. I
t felt so right when they were
together
. She
spent most of he
r time away from him thinking about
him and wishing the clock would move so they could be together again. Could it be as he said, they were fated to be together?

Or
was she just mistaking an adolescent crush
for true love?

Lex is
a leg
end. He’s
like Elvis. Why does he want to marry me?

A short wh
ile later, Lex and Jessie walked
the dogs along the beac
hfront of the elite Malibu
colony
. Jessie was a bundle of nerves
while Lex exuded an aura of serenity, as if all was right in the universe as he walked beside her and held her hand.  His loose ha
ir was blown back by
the wind. H
is eyes were hidden behind dark shades.

“Lex.” Jessie began, shouting over the wind and the noise of the surf. “We have to discuss this rationally.”

He smiled at her. A brash, sexy s
mile that made her insides melt
.
God, did he have to be so good looking?
Waves crashed beyond
them.  The wind taunted her ponytail, we
nding the loose ends of it about her face as it tickled her nose.

Freeing her hand from his, Jessie gathered her hair as she held Duncan’s lea
sh in the other hand. “
Getting married, so soon.
This is crazy.” She turned to the sexy man now sprawled out on a rock, his long black legs propped up as he stroked Jack’s pug nestled there between them.

Crazy, you are the one who’s crazy, Jessie. Passing up a chance at what most girls just dream about
?

“Why?” He asked, studying her with patience.

“I just met you.
”

Leaning toward her, Lex removed the dark glasses, caressing her with eyes so blue they took her bre
ath away, and her thoughts
. “Okay.” He smiled, patting the rock beside him. “Sit down, relax, Jess.” 

“
Okay?
” Jessie repeated, expecting impassioned pleas fro
m this complex Adonis
. With an exasperated huff, she sat down next to him, her arms crossed about her as Duncan panted beside her, his hot breath blending with
the scent of the wet sand and
decomposing seaweed.

“Why are you offended
by my offer
?” Lex intoned, reaching down to scratch D
uncan’s bearded chin. 

“I’m not offended. It’s not that.
” Jessie turned to him once more, brushing a stray lock from
her eyes. “Look, this is really just too sudden for me.
I need more
time.”

“Is three w
eeks long enough?”

“
Three weeks
.
”  Jessie turned, facing him completely as she struggled to keep her hair in place. “Are you--”

“Ape-shit crazy
? Not
that I’m aware of.”  He sat up and reached
for her hand. “From that
first night
at Beau Rivage, I knew
, Jessie
.  There was never any doubt
for me. N
o wavering. I never thought, ‘Gee, should I
ask her
or shouldn’t I?’ I just knew you were the one I’d been waiting for all these years.”

Jessie shook her head, unable to comprehend his surety.

“Listen, there is
an ancient legend that says
in the beginning all of us were bot
h male and female. The halves were severed
and ever since, each one of us feels tha
t emptiness. Each one of us is searching
for that missing part, t
he other half
of our soul that completes us. I believe
you and I belong together.
We complete one another.
Why does that scare you?” 

“Who was your soul mate last week?” Jessie teased, trying to lighten the mood.

“You are the first
and the last
.” His tanned hand lifted her chin to meet his eyes, makin
g Jessie’s resolve melt
beneath t
hat magnetic, sensual gaze. “W
e were discussing your misgivings
.
What is it that frightens you
about this?”

She gave a slight shrug. His fi
ngertip caressed her chin
and
circled he
r lips.

“How do I know all of this isn’t a front?”  Jessie frowne
d slightly, trying to think of
the right words to convey her concerns. “Aren’t you divorced? Wasn’t there some model you were married to a few years ago?"

“No, we never married, much as I wanted to. I lived with Crys
tal James for ten years. She’s a fashion model.” He explained
, studying her response. “I don’t know if you are aware
of the trial. My manager and my publicist tried
to keep it hush-hush.”

“
Trial?
” A sinking feeling grew in the pit of her stomach.

Lex let go of her chin. His right arm kept her at his side as he looked past them, out at t
he sea.  “I loved her
. It took me ten years to
realize
she didn’t love me in the same way. She was using me to get exposure in the media and
to
further her own career. She said marriage would spoil our re
lationship.  I always felt it
would solidify a relationship, makes us truly committed to one another. She didn’t feel that way. She saw marriage as some kind of male bondage gig, an old fashioned convention to keep women under subjugation.”

He looked at Jessie again, pain seeping into his
blue eyes. “Is that what all women think today?”

“Kyra and I always believed guys were the ones who found marriage out-dated. Even my brother quotes that old line of ‘why buy t
he cow when the milk is free.
’” 

“T
o make sure no one else is getting
all your milk?” Lex grinned
.

Jessie gave a loud hiss as she slapped him on the thigh. “Shame on you
.
”

“We
ll, you asked.” He teased, and then continued
. “Crystal had an affair wit
h this attorney in New York
. She called me in Stockholm wh
en I was touring to tell me
she’d been
seeing the guy behind my back
for six months and
was leaving me for him. That wasn’t
the
worst part.” He grew silent, fingering the pug’s collar with his free hand.

“What was the worst part
?”

“She tried to sue
me
for half of my fortune.
She believed that because we were together in the early years, that she had a hand in helping me become famous, and I owed her.
” He ground out the words with disgust. “And her lover, the lawyer, conv
inced her she was entitled to
half my earnings as Lex
. That hurt worse than her leaving me
for another man
--
the fact that
she’d actually sue me
for monetary gain
after I’d asked her to marry me many times over the years and she always refused.
If she had married me, like I wanted, she would have been an equal partner all along.
”

That
was why he’d left her, ran away to New York
.
Lex
assumed that she was carrying on covertly with Steve behin
d his back,
just as Crystal betrayed him.
“Why didn’t you tell me thi
s last night? You were so angry
you frightened me. Now, today, you’re asking me to marry
you. I can’t help but feel dizzy in the spin
.”

He turned to face her
again. “Forgive me. I’m sorry
.”  His eyes, so expressive, couldn't hide the shame. He breathed, “
I didn’t think. I reacted.
You must think--”

“I don’t know what to think
.” Jessie responded. She took a breath, trying to co
ntrol the rising anger. “You ditched me
and now, you’re acting like everything
is okay, like nothing happened. It’s
not
okay.
”

“I love you,
Jessic
a
.”

“
So w
hy the big hurry?
Is there a deadline on that love?
”

“I don’t want to lose you.”

Jessie shook her head
. “Yeah, right. That’s why you dumped me first.”

“
Jess.” He closed his eyes, shaking his head slowly as he used Jack’s familiar address on her. “I thoug
ht we covered that. W
hat more can I say?”