The Road to Justice/Sins of the Son combo pack - A John Fowler Novel (John Fowler (Books 1 & 2)) (43 page)

“
No it
’
s not a typical day,
”
John replied. 
“
My life was an abysmal mess for the last three years!!
”
 
John scoffed. 
“
Life!!
  That
‘
s a hoot.  I honestly hadn
’
t lived for the past three years!  Do you know how many seedy pictures I
’
ve taken of seedy people in seedy places!?!  It
’
s a miracle I can eat.  Some of the things I saw were just stomach turning!
”
 
Stephen was jotting something in his notes.  He stood up and walked around to his desk.  Stephen signed a piece of paper.  Stephen walked back to his chair and sat down.  He handed the paper to John.  It was his reinstatement.

“
That
’
s it!?!
”
John asked incredulously.

“
You
’
ve got problems
,
John.  Heck, we
’
ve all got problems.  I have my orders, but I have my conscience as well.  You said it yourself.  You
’
ve lived more in the past
few days than you have the past few years.  I feel that taking you away from the FBI would do you more harm than good.  Welcome back John.  Welcome back to the FBI, but more importantly, welcome back to life.
”

Tears filled John
’
s eyes.  He didn
’
t know until that moment how much the FBI meant to him.  He was back!!  He was finally back!!!

John was as happy as he could remember being.  As great a feeling as this was, he was very conflicted.  He knew he had to continue to talk to Stephen.  He had to work out the problems in his head, and he couldn
’
t go to Trip with his concerns
; not until he had everything he needed
. 

“
Stephen, this is going to sound odd, but I need a favor,
”
John said.

“
I
’
ll do my best to help,
”
Stephen replied.

“
I need to talk about some things.
”
 
John stood up and started to pace. 
“
There are things that don
’
t make sense, but I can
’
t decide if it
’
s because something is really going on, or if it
’
s because I
’
ve got some pent up thingamajig.
”

“
I
’
m not sure thingamajig is a scientific term,
”
began Stephen. 
“
But we can talk a while and see if we can straighten out whatever is bothering you.  Go ahead.
”

John started to pace and then pinch his bottom lip together while he was doing it.  Stephen watched in fascination.  He had heard John was a master of deduction, and to watch him in action was something.  John began.

“
The way I was brought back to the FBI doesn
’
t make a lot of sense to me,
”
John paused his pacing and looked directly at Stephen. 
“
It doesn
’
t make sense mostly because of what I know that a lot of people don
’
t know
.  It
’
s
about how I left the FBI.
”
 
John stopped talking, waiting for Stephen to sort through what he said.  Stephen nodded for John to continue.  John began to pace and talk. 

“
Everyone thinks we busted an entire crime family three years ago, but that
’
s not entirely true.  We busted everyone we had something on, but there was one member that we didn
’
t get.
”
 
John stopped, and stood still, barely breathing.  Stephen found himself holding his breath. 

“
Who was it??
”
 
Stephen asked.

“
You know him today as t
he alleged head of the Lucciano c
rime family, Robert Mariotti Jr., but back then he was simply
‘
The Duck
’
,
”
John said.  Stephen tried to look serious.  Then he began to snicker.  The snickers turned into full fledge laughter. 

“
The Duck?
”
 
Stephen asked. 
“
The Duck!?!
”
 
Stephen began to shake with laughter.  John smiled and waited for Stephen to ask him something.  Stephen signaled for John to continue.  John waited for Stephen
’
s laughter to subside.  The internal alarm was starting to go off in the back of John
’
s head. 

“
I know, trust me I know it
’
s the craziest name ever given,
”
John said. 
“
No one calls him that today, but what no one realizes is Duck left the crime family about a week before we began our undercover sting.  That was right about the time it became known in my team that I was to go undercover.  It always bothered me a little about the timing of the whole thing.  After my wife died I didn
’
t care if the mob put a hit out on me or not.  Looking back, I do find it awful strange that it never happened.
”
 

John stopped. He didn
’
t know if he could tell Stephen the next part.  He was at a point he could say it was all crazy coincidence and conspiracy theory on his part.  John knew himself well.  Once he voiced the questions he had, he wouldn
’
t let them go until he knew the answers.   Stephen quietly asked a question.

“
John, do you think this man had something to do with your wife
’
s death?  Did he either kill her or place a hit on her?
”

“
No,
”
John replied.  Emotions washed over John. 
“
No.  Oh man.
”
 
John sat down in the chair.  Tears were coming to his eyes.  He had sworn to himself this was over.

“
Let it out
,
John,
”
Stephen said.

“
I
’
ve been letting out tears for three years Stephen.
”

“
That
’
s right
,
John, but let the words out, express your feelings.  Tell me what you
’
re holding on to that you haven
’
t told apparently anyone.
“

John looked down at the floor. 
“
I think my wife was murdered and I don
’
t think it had anything to do with me.  I
’
m supposed to be this great detective and I can
’
t figure out who or why
my wife was killed
.  Don
’
t you see, if it had something to do with me, I could punish myself.  I could pay for my sins.  I could drink myself to death and not regret it for one minute, but it
’
s not my fault.
”
 
John was freely sobbing. 
“
Stephen, I think she was killed . . . just because.
”

Stephen nodded. 
“
And the explosion?
”

John waved his hand in the air like he was annoyed with the rank amateur question. 
“
A cover-up; fire is one of the greatest weapons in covering something up.  If done right . . .
“
 
John
left his thought hanging.  John slammed both of his fists against the arms of the chair.  Stephen smiled a sad smile and nodded. 

“
Why couldn
’
t it be my fault
,
Stephen?  Why!?!?  I could punish me, I could.  I can
’
t catch whoever did this and until I
do .
.  . I can
’
t move on.  It
’
s not fair.  I
’
m alive and she
’
s dead.  It
’
s not fair she
’
s dead, but she is.  She
’
s dead, and I
’
m the one that should be
,
”
John sat there, head down.  He looked at Stephen. 
“
I thought I was past this.
”

“
John
,
you
’
re not past it, until you
’
re past it.  What can I say, you
’
ve got a form of survivor
’
s guilt; you know, a thingamajig.
”
 
John laughed.  He dried the tears on his face.  Stephen studied John for a minute and then spoke. 
“
You weren
’
t done with your concerns were you?
”

John glanced at Stephen sideways as he drank some water.  John liked Stephen
, and
wanted to consider him a friend, but John was afraid that wasn
’
t possible.  John sat
the bottle down. 
“
I
’
ve gotta say
,
Stephen,
”
John began. 
“
You
’
re good.
”
 

             
“
So I
’
m guessing you
’
ve read my file?
”
John asked.  Stephen nodded. 
“
Then I think there might be a little something in there about me being interrogated by
‘
The Hammer
’
and how well that went?
”
 
Stephen winced. 
“
What it didn
’
t tell was how I blessed out reporters, my in-laws, parents, and anyone I felt like after the funeral.  Jessica covered for me on all of those occasions.  She even, according to her, began dating my buddy to find out about me.
”

             
John was up and walking again. 
“
What really bothers me is they both gave a slightly different story of what happened.  They both claim they asked the other out.  Not a big deal, but it
’
s one of many small strange things.
”
 
John stopped. 
“
If I sound crazy, you
’
ll tell me, right?
”

             
“
John,
”
Stephen began. 
“
You do sound a little like a conspiracy theorist, but that doesn
’
t mean you
’
re wrong.
”
 

             
John continued with the story and pacing.

             
“
The next inconsistency we have is the supposed DVD or some type of recording done by David George.  Chet claimed he saw a video, and there isn
’
t one in evidence.  I also asked David George about it.  Now I admit David
’
s not the greatest witness in the world, but I believe him.
”
 
Stephen looked at John skeptically. 
“
I asked him, if he was the one who killed those four people would he have taped it.  He replied that wouldn
’
t be a very smart thing to do.
”
 
Stephen nodded that he understood and motioned for John to continue.

             
“
The last thing that concerns me is something that I dismissed at the time but now that I
’
ve had a little time to think about it, really bothers me.  According to Trip and the Senator, Arthur is the one who demanded me back in the FBI.
”
 
John stopped walking and looked at Stephen.  Stephen looked absolutely perplexed.