Read The Retreat (The After Trilogy Book 1) Online
Authors: Kelly St. Clare
H
er mind was slamming against her skull.
Romy groaned, lifting a hand to her temple. Her stomach rolled as the ground lurched beneath her.
“Rise and shhhhhine.”
It spoke for how terrible she felt that Romy didn’t react to Houston’s voice by clawing his eyes out. Forcing her eyes open, she took stock.
Her knot members sat in a circle, tied to a tree. Blood trickled down Thrym’s face, and their supplies were strewn all over the clearing. There had been a fight. And her knot lost. Dread fell like a rock into her stomach. She groaned again, this time because of a different pain. Atlas was going to hurt her family. He’d caught them.
But how
?
She locked eyes with Deimos.
“The catheter has a kink,” he said.
Romy tried to sit. And that was when she realised just how naked she was. Blushing, Romy pulled up the blanket wrapped around her so it was just under her chin.
“Bit late for that, little skyling,” Houston sang. “Your breasts are divine, by the way. You wouldn’t think it from outside the clothing, but believe me—”
A fist flew out of nowhere and smacked into the back of the doctor’s head.
“Ow!”
Tilting her head, Romy unleashed the full power of her loathing on
him
. Atlas’s expression flickered with some kind of emotion before he turned away.
He chucked some clothing at her. “Go, put these on.”
Romy glanced at the clothing, not moving.
“And don’t think of running. I have your knot.”
Anger bubbling, Romy snatched up the clothing with one hand, clutching the blanket with the other.
Once in the tree line, she thought rapidly. Did the pair have backup? It seemed unlikely they came alone. Romy jerked a white T-shirt on and stormed back into the clearing. As she did, her eyes fell on a streamlined, two-wheeled vehicle that Houston was rolling into their strewn camp.
That explained how the pair caught up. But not how they found them so easily. Romy still didn’t know if there were others.
Atlas turned as she approached. He didn’t move as Romy pulled back her left hand and slapped him as hard as she possibly could across the face. His head rocked to the side, his feet unmoving. She heard Elara gasp behind her.
“You traitor,” she said in a shaking voice.
He turned to face forwards, red handprint bright on his cheek. “You
idiot
,” he countered. “Do you have any idea what you’ve done?”
Whatever response she’d expected, it wasn’t that. Romy folded her arms, taking a step backwards. When in doubt, remain silent.
Atlas invaded the space she’d just established. “You were nearly safe,” he yelled.
Romy’s eyes widened, despite her own fury as Atlas lost his temper.
She shook her head. “I heard you, Atlas! I heard you talking to Tina, saying how the Orbitos were coming to get us. Our
bodies.
”
Atlas opened his mouth.
“Atlas,” Houston said quietly.
“How did you find us?” snapped Romy, turning to the less-confusing doctor.
Houston rubbed the back of his head. “Uh, well, I put trackers in each of you.”
Why was it Houston kept failing her? He grew pale under the force of her withering glare.
Romy looked between them as Atlas ran a hand through his hair. It looked like he’d been doing it constantly for the last several days. “Houston, they need to be told something.”
Houston stared at the larger man. “You know the risk?”
Atlas gave a curt nod and turned to Romy. “What you
think
you heard, was not what you think at all.”
She crossed her arms. “Okay, let’s hear it, then.”
His jaw clenched at the sarcasm in her voice. He inhaled heavily. “That’s all I can tell you, right now.”
“You have got to be joking!” Deimos shouted.
Atlas whirled on her knot. “I want you to listen closely. And I want you to think about what I’m saying, and what it might mean.”
It was like the ground she was standing on was shaking. Because she desperately wanted there to be a valid reason for his lies. He still affected her in the best possible way, and she hated it.
Houston had grabbed Atlas’s arm. “You need to be careful,” he muttered. “Until we get to the bunker.”
She wasn’t sure if that had been meant for her ears.
Atlas faced their knot. “Did any of you ever consider that if you were caught, your memories will be studied? That everything you’ve heard will be noted. And to a small degree, what you have seen will be watched.”
Romy squeezed her eyes shut. What was he saying? How was that possible?
Houston stepped in. “Genetically enhanced soldiers are each fitted with extensive memory nano-wear. It is most accurate with recording what you hear, for lack of a better layman’s term.”
Thrym spoke behind her. “So we weren’t told anything in case we were caught.”
Houston and Atlas nodded, staying silent.
Her brows drew together. “Why didn’t you just tell us that was the reason?”
“Because the information is only known to a select few. It would have narrowed their list of suspects considerably,” Atlas replied.
Houston had said audio was the particular thing they had to watch for. “What about visual?” she asked. Should they be more worried Knot 27 had seen their faces?
Houston shook his head. “Too subjective. Clouded by judgements, light, and emotion—just to name a few.”
But Atlas spoke to Commander Cronus daily.
. . .Was Atlas playing both sides? She darted a look at him. Was that even a thing? Was there another side to be
on
?
“Unfortunately, your actions alerted the Mandate to something being amiss,” Atlas said flatly, staring at her.
Was it the call? Or killing Lucas? She ground her teeth. “Are you seriously blaming me,
Commander
?”
Houston cursed under his breath. “Shit, Atlas. They know too much already. The Mandate can’t get ahold of them with the information they know. It will lead straight to you.”
Atlas placed his hands behind his back and approached Knot 27. “I need you to come with us. Right now. Once Houston has a chance to remove your memory chips, then I can tell you all you wish to know.”
“Why didn’t you take them out when we first arrived?” Elara burst out, struggling against her bindings.
Both Houston and Atlas kept their lips closed.
Romy’s heart beat wildly in her chest. Could there be a chance she’d been wrong about it all? Devastation pulled her downwards. Lucas. If Atlas was innocent, then she’d killed a man for nothing.
“I can tell you everything once we reach the bunker.”
One thing was bothering her.
Phobos beat her to it. “I hope you’re not implying we take your word for it?” He eyed Atlas with distrust.
Romy’s head gave a painful throb. “Ro?” Elara asked.
She wrung her hands together. “I don’t know whether to trust what they say. I won’t trust him until he tells me everything.”
They were still looking at her expectantly.
“I can’t make this decision.”
“I’m afraid it doesn’t matter whether you believe me or not. If you don’t follow me, you’ll all die. Your entire knot.” Atlas’s eyes were hard. “They’re behind us. They’re hunting you.”
Shock coursed through her and she welcomed the mental clarity it brought.
“As I said, you can either stay put and get caught by the Mandate in just over twenty-four hours. Or you can follow me to the safe house.”
“I say we do it,” a deep voice said. Thrym?
Romy couldn’t help the sound of surprise that left her. Out of everyone, Thrym trusted him?
Thrym was staring at her from where he sat tied to the tree. Sure. Now that the blood was washed off he could look at her.
“We need more information. . . .” He trailed off, and Romy could see he was thinking hard. Thrym had another reason for wanting to go with the two men. He had a plan. Elara and Phobos were watching him. They nodded at the same time.
“I say we go to this safe house,” Phobos said.
“We’ll come with you,” Thrym said again. “But you will tell us one more thing before we leave.”
Atlas remained silent.
Thrym licked his lips, glancing at Romy.
And Romy understood what he was going to ask. Whipping around, she turned to repack her swag, unable to stand their stares. But her ears strained to hear every word.
“What’s happening to Ro?” Thrym asked softly.
Houston interrupted immediately. “We can’t—”
“No, H,” Atlas said.
“Are
you
insane?” Houston whispered. “If they ever found out. . . .”
Footsteps approached behind her. She clenched the swag in a death grip as she rolled it.
His voice spoke only to her, though everyone could hear.
“The Orbitos creators knew that if the four thousand ever found out about the betrayal, they’d need protection from you.”
Romy stared at her pack with unseeing eyes.
“And so each of the four thousand has a built-in safety . . . which triggers when killing a human being.”
“Enough!” Houston shouted. “You’ve told them too much, Atlas! Don’t be a fool. We’ve worked too hard and too long for this.”
And what was the safety, Romy wondered. To go insane? That was how she felt. To die from lack of sleep? Or to stop functioning altogether? She wanted to lie down, right here, and stare at nothing. Was that what it did?
Her eyes closed as the terrible truth settled upon her. Something inside her
was
broken.
Everyone was shouting at each other. Houston was screaming at her knot. And Romy was just too tired to deal with it all.
“It was him?”
She jumped at the words, glancing over her shoulder at Atlas.
He studied her intently. It reminded her of his expression when they first met. He’d looked at her like she was an experiment.
She didn’t answer.
“If he hurt you, he got everything he deserved,” Atlas said in a low voice.
Did one unwilling kiss, a forced caress, a few pushes, and threats justify killing a man? Romy looked up at Atlas, who watched her still.
You didn’t mean to kill him,
his expression seemed to say.
But she had.
She should feel remorse.
But she only felt terror at the memory of his blood.
R
omy walked at the back. She couldn’t be near Atlas until she knew he was telling the truth.
The ringing had disappeared just before daybreak this morning.
Instinctually, Romy knew its replacement was worse.
A block had descended on her mind that she couldn’t push through. It was as if the denial had made her stronger before. But now that she had confirmation something was wrong, her defence was stripped away.
A fog clouded her judgement, keeping her slightly to the side of reality. It filled her with every breath, but didn’t leave her lungs on the breath out. It was filling her mind, slowly taking over her actions. The floating sensation was back. Romy had become a shadow of herself.
Worse was the glass. That was the only way she could describe it. It felt like Romy’s sanity was encased in a glass cabinet. And she stood paralysed, scared to move for fear the glass would break.
There were cracks in the glass already, in her mind’s eye. The largest was right under her feet—from killing Lucas—with the other cracks branching out in ugly splinters all around her.
One was from Atlas’s betrayal.
Another from the thought of Knot 27 perishing.
Washing the blood from her hair.
Thrym’s avoidance.
Her knot’s wary glances.
“You all right, little skyling?”
Romy blinked into Houston’s face. She looked around and saw she’d wandered quite far from the rest of them. She was heading in an entirely different direction. Her eyes met Houston’s once more. She expected to see amusement in his features at her wandering off the path. But it wasn’t there. There was concern. And something else she couldn’t grasp. Excitement?
Romy swallowed. “Of course. Just tired.”
He stared at her until he caught sight of her perplexed expression, and straightened with a sniff.
“Don’t wander off. There are drop bears everywhere.” He looked up into the trees with apprehension as he shifted back to the group.
Romy peered into the trees also.
She brushed through the knee-high, grass-like shrubs and looked up, noticing Houston was now up by Atlas, their heads together in deep discussion.
Thrym searched her face as Romy neared. She kept her features blank.
He shied away as she came close and Romy jolted, seized in fear as the glass in her mind cracked just a little more.
* * *
E
very so often Houston would fall back to Deimos’s side and give him a shot of something. Whatever it was, it kept the twin going long past what he would otherwise have been capable of. Romy walked into Elara.
“We’re stopping for the rest of the night,” Elara explained.
It didn’t look like Houston was on the same page. “We should keep going,” he was insisting.
The moon was bright. Bright enough to see Atlas flick a dark look her way.
“No,” he said.
Romy shucked her pack and rested her back against a tree. She wanted to keep moving, to ensure her knot was safe before she fell through the glass in her mind. Romy didn’t expect she’d come back if that happened.
Heavy steps halted in front of her. Romy’s chest squeezed as Atlas approached. But the man simply righted her pack from where she had dumped it, opened the top, and removed her swag with a sharp tug.
Romy peeked under her lashes as he rolled the swag out onto a clear patch of ground. Atlas stared down at the bedding afterward and then turned his head to meet her gaze.
Anger, worry, arrogance, compassion, deceit. It was possible every one of those emotions were present. But without knowing which it was, Romy wasn’t going to trust those gorgeous grey eyes. She’d trusted them once before. And if he broke her trust again, that would be the end.
The tall man folded his long frame to sit down next to her. Not touching. Somehow he knew not to touch her. He sat near enough that she could feel the added warmth of his body.
“Hey. Look what I found!” Houston exclaimed. He was plucking something off his body.
He ran over to Romy and held out his hand. In between his thumb and forefinger was a small, wriggling insect.
She gave him a doubtful look, too tired to care. “What is it?”
A wooden sound reached her ears. Was that her voice?
His glasses glinted in the moonlight, giving the doctor’s face a creepy luminous quality. “It’s a
leech
, little skyling. They suck blood from human bodies.”
Romy froze at the mention of blood. Why was he showing this to her?
Houston pinched his fingers together firmly. The bug exploded. Red trickled down over the doctor’s hand. The leech writhed in jerking swirls and time slowed as Houston threw the bloody insect to the ground, droplets of blood flying from his hand.
To land at her feet.
It was all over her! Spurting blood! Everywhere!
The floating unreal sensation had been present ever since killing Lucas. But this time she didn’t just float. Romy was flung out of herself. A drumming noise bounced everywhere, the noise doubling back on itself in an escalating clamour. And above it, a high keening. Romy looked down to the ground and reeled back.
She was high above the ground now, floating there. Below her, side by side with only a thin wall between them, sat two apparitions. Her eyes fixated on the left side of the partition.
The person there had the same blonde hair as Romy.
It
was
her, she realised. But this Romy’s hair hung in greasy clumps, blue eyes popping wildly from her face. This version writhed in agonised spasms, screaming and twisting, trying to escape the box she’d been squeezed into.
On the other side, the second Romy sat on a rock, frozen in the moonlight, staring at the dirt by her feet. In this scene, the Romy was musing that the dust wasn’t
really
red here after all; more an orange. When it was put next to human blood, the difference in hue was obvious.
Romy hovered over the two scenes. She could go to either, but not both. She merely had to choose which one to land in. She felt the choice should be obvious, but couldn’t recall why that should be. She looked from the serene Romy to the demented Romy once more.
Then, squeezing her eyes closed from high above, she chose.
* * *
T
he scene was wildly different from when she left.
Atlas had one hand wrapped around Houston’s throat, the other hand raised to deliver a hammering blow. Thrym was sprinting at the larger man. Atlas roared and threw him back with a powerful swipe of his arm.
What was going on?
Atlas had let go of Houston to get rid of Thrym, but he now resumed his stranglehold.
Romy could see he was going to slam his fist down onto Houston’s face.
Blood
.
Romy was up and had a hold on Atlas’s arm as it descended. She pulled back with all her strength. Atlas turned on her in a blur.
There was a small instant where she saw the murder in his eyes. But then. . . .
The doctor was dropped with a thud.
Romy winced as his head bounced on rock. Houston gasped for breath, too weak to roll out from the dangerous space Atlas occupied.
Atlas was staring at her in amazement. Like he could barely believe his eyes. What had he witnessed in those first few seconds?
“You?” he breathed.
“What?” Romy snapped. What the hell was going on?
“You’re still here.”
He was trying to conceal his reaction, with obvious difficulty. And for the first time, Romy came to understand there must be something unusual in her behaviour—to how she’d reacted to Lucas’s death.
“Why wouldn’t I be?”
Romy waited, but the answer didn’t come.
Not until the safe house
, she thought bitterly.
Atlas’s look of amazement didn’t quite make sense, and it was making her paranoid.
Romy ignored the hushed silence and slipped into her sleeping bag where no one could see her. It quickly grew unbearably warm in the space as her breath heated the inside. But she stayed there, hanging on to herself with her fingertips. What would have happened if she’d chosen the wild Romy? She stared at the dark material centimetres from her face.
Gradually, the others quietened.
It was possibly hours later when someone finally spoke.
Houston was whispering. “I told you. She’s the key. I think we’ve finally found it, Atlas.”
The bespectacled man was always cheerful, often excited, and always glib. Which was why Romy held her breath at the desperation in his tone. The anguish. And the longing.
A sharp order to “shut his mouth” came from Atlas.
Several long beats passed and Romy was just about to emerge from the sauna-like temperature in her swag, when the doctor spoke again.
“We need her, Atlas. You know we do.”
Romy strained her ears, shutting her eyes and holding every muscle tight as though if any other sense were open, it would make hearing Atlas’s reply impossible.
Atlas’s words slipped through the dead-calm of night towards her with ease.
“I know.”