The Regency (103 page)

Jack looked subdued, and Fanny said impatiently, 'Well,
it's very unfortunate for Tom and Edmund, but I don't think
we should let it cast a shadow over the evening. After all,
none of us was related to her.'

‘
We all knew her,' Horace said, a shade resentfully. 'We
all liked her very much. You were at her wedding, Miss
Morland.'

‘
Yes, I know. I was fond of Patience myself. But life must
go on, you know. You all came here to dance, didn't you?
Don't be such hypocrites.’

They looked at her uncomfortably, and then at their feet.
Of course she was right, but it was not tactful of her to
remind them of it quite so brutally. There was something —
well,
unfeminine
about Fanny Morland sometimes.

Polly hadn't wanted to come to the ball, and hadn't expected
to enjoy it when she got there. She had been approached by
one or two gentlemen and asked to dance, but she had refused
them, and remained at Minnie's side, silent, a little resentful,
while Minnie was apparently quite happy just to watch the
dancing. When the supper interval came, Minnie expressed
herself surprised that the time had gone so quickly.

Everyone was in motion at once towards the supper-rooms.
Lord Harvey had disappeared soon after they arrived — so
much, Polly thought, for making sure Minnie had some
dancing — so it was left to Polly to escort her cousin through
the crowds, in the hope that they would be able to procure
some supper, and somewhere to sit to consume it. In the
press through the ballroom doors, Polly was separated from
Minnie, and soon lost sight of her as she was thrust further
ahead, and taller people interposed between them. It was then
that she felt a hand on her arm, and turned her head to see
Lord Harvey beside her.

‘Let her go,' he said. 'I want to talk to you.'

‘
We're going in to supper. We didn't know where you
were,' Polly said, not understanding him. His grip on her arm tightened. They came opposite another passage which led off at right-angles, and he tugged her out of the stream of people
and into the passageway, which ran the width of the ballroom,
behind the stage.

‘
What are you doing? Let me go,' she said angrily, trying to
pull herself free.

‘
Don't struggle, Polly,' he said grimly. 'You'll draw atten
tion to us and people will wonder what is happening.'

‘
They'll wonder anyway. We've no business being here,'
she said. The corridor was completely featureless, a way
between the two parallel passages on either side of the ball
room, along which the crowds were streaming towards the
supper-rooms. 'Where are you taking me? Let me go, you're
hurting my arm.’

No, not quite featureless. Half-way along, on the left, was a
small, low door, whose knob Harvey grasped with his free
hand.

‘
I've reconnoitred ahead, like a good campaigner,' he said.
He glanced around. 'No-one's looking. Quick! In you go.’

He thrust open the door and, so that Polly should not resist,
twisted his arm round her waist and whirled her through
it. They were in an open space under the stage, evidently used
for storage, for there were stacks of rout-chairs and folding
card-tables, benches, heaps of dusty curtains, and boxes of all
sizes. It was not dark, for all the way along there were small
windows high up which let in the light from the passageway.
It would be dangerous, probably to have lamps or candles in
a place like this, Polly's mind reasoned in spite of herself and
her predicament.

He released her, but stood between her and the door, as
though he thought she might bolt. Polly stood, slowly rubbing
her bruised wrist, looking at him thoughtfully, but saying
nothing.

‘
Well, here we are,' he said nervously. 'I'm sorry to bring
you to such a dusty place, but I had to be sure of being alone
with you.'

‘
You didn't have to go to such lengths, surely? There must
have been opportunities elsewhere to talk to me. Why make
me come to this ball?'

‘
Because I had to trap you in a public place. At home — at Shawes — you can too easily avoid me; and there are always
servants listening. And besides —'

‘Yes?'

‘I had a foolish desire to dance with you.’

Polly looked at him disbelievingly. 'Why didn't you ask me to dance, then? I should have refused you, but you didn't even
ask.'

‘
Because you made me angry,' he said, suddenly stepping
forward. 'This dress, for instance! Why did you put on this
dress? It's hideous! And this,' he gestured at her head. 'Why
have you dragged your hair back like that? Where are the little
curls you used to wear round your face? You know it doesn't
become you so.'

‘
What has it to do with you?' Her low voice vibrated with
anger. 'I shall dress myself as I please, without consulting you,
my lord!'

‘
You're deliberately trying to make yourself look ugly, and
I won't have it!'

‘
You
won't have it? What right do you have to object to
anything I choose to do?'

‘
The right of loving you, Polly,' he said urgently. She
flinched and looked away.

‘
You're a married man, my lord. Married to my cousin.’

‘
Don't call me that! Harvey, my name is Harvey!’

‘
I have no right to use it.'

‘
Right! You're always talking about rights! I didn't have
any rights when it came to marrying. I was obliged to marry
your cousin. There was nothing I could do about it. But it was you I loved. I love you still.'

‘Then I'm sorry for you,' she said harshly.

‘
Be sorry for yourself, too, for you love me! Oh my darling,
this is torture!'

‘
Then you should have let me go,' she said angrily. 'After the first few weeks, when she could have got on without me.
When you went to Northumberland, you should have let me
go.

‘
I couldn't. I have to have you near me, or my life is
nothing. Polly, we've had all this out before. You promised
you would stay —'

‘If you behaved yourself.'

‘
And I have, haven't I? Minnie is happy, she has never
suspected anything, not for an instant. But you haven't
played fair.'

‘What do you mean?' she said, alarmed.

He took the last step to her, and put his hands up to her
head, and she felt his long fingers seeking out the pins that
held her hair in place.

‘This is what I mean,' he said.

‘Stop it! Harvey, don't do that!'

‘
This, and that gown, and all the other hideous gowns
you've made this last year.' He pulled out pins feverishly.
'You're the most beautiful creature I've ever seen, and you're
trying to make yourself ugly. I can't bear it, Polly, do you
hear?'

‘Please, Harvey, don't —’

Her freed hair tumbled down her back. He thrust his fingers
into it to either side of her head, and loosened it, pulling it
forward to frame her face, and then his hands cupped her
face and tilted it up to him.

‘
I've done my duty,' he said hoarsely, 'and I've done every
thing everyone asked of me, but I must have something,
Polly. I know I can't have you, but I must be allowed to look
at you, my beautiful, beautiful girl!'

‘
No, no you mustn't,' she moaned; but she was past
struggling. His lips came down on hers, and after an instant
she put her arms round him, and they were locked together in the embrace that had been denied them all this long time. He
kissed her lips, her brow, her throat, her lips again.

‘I love you, Polly. It was always you.’

‘I love you too,' she said helplessly.

Their madness lasted only an instant. Voices sounded close
at hand, startling them, and they thrust themselves apart as
a group of people went past in the corridor, chatting and
laughing. It came to Polly instantly what a wrong and sordid
thing they were doing, secretively in this dusty place. It was
dishonourable, it was weak, it was horrible. She drew away
from him, and put her hands to her head.

‘
You must help me,' she said tersely. 'I cannot put it up on
my own, without a mirror.'

‘
Yes, all right,' he said, subdued. 'Polly, I'm sorry; but you
made me so angry.'

‘
You made me angry, too. Why did you go away all summer,
and then all autumn too? Especially when Minnie needed
you?'

‘
She didn't need me. She'll never need me. As long as she
has you, she's happy. You will stay with her, won't you?
Please, Polly, don't think of going away.'

‘
It's cruel to both of us to go on as we are. Cruel and
dangerous.'

‘
No!' he said fiercely, and then, as she flinched, he said in
a quieter, but still intense voice, 'No Polly. I promise you
nothing like this will ever happen again. I will be absolutely correct towards you — to both of you. But you mustn't wear
ugly clothes, or dress your hair like this: I can't bear it. Please, promise me you'll be beautiful. Let me have the
pleasure of looking at you, and I promise everything will
be all right.'

‘
Nothing can ever be all right,' she said. 'But I have
nowhere else to go. I'll stay, because I have to.'

‘No, because you want to,' he pressed her.

‘That's the necessity,' she said unhappily.

*

Fanny had enjoyed the ball after all. A new group of officers
from Fulford had arrived, and had rapidly singled her out as
the prettiest girl in the room, so she had had the double
pleasure of flirting and dancing with them, and of seeing her
established courtiers looking jealous and angry. She had gone
into supper with Henry Bayliss and Jack Dykes, and had
managed to appear to look for Flaminia so as to sit with her,
without any danger of actually fmding her.