The Rancher's Bride (5 page)

“I want you to know how grateful I am to you, Rose,” Harlan said as they drove away from the ranch onto the dark dirt road.

His unexpected words caused her head to swivel his way.
“Grateful? I can’t imagine for what. You loaned Daddy lots of money. You’re more than entitled to our water.”

Harlan shook his head. “I’m not talking about any of that.”

Dear heaven, he wasn’t talking about that kiss, was he? She wished he’d forget it. She wished she could wipe it completely from her mind. But how could she, when just sitting here beside him in the dark was making her heart pound?

“Then what—”

“I’m talking about Emily. She’s taken to you. And I’m…more than grateful that you didn’t push her away tonight.”

Rose sagged with relief. She could talk about Emily. She couldn’t talk about what had happened between the two of them down by the barn.

“Emily is a lovely child. I wouldn’t push her away for any reason.”

He sighed. “That’s very generous of you. Especially after the rude way she behaved yesterday.” He grunted a sound of amused disbelief. “Last night she refused to ride with us to the Bar M and now she can’t wait to go. I don’t know if I’ll ever understand my daughter.”

“Maybe it’s females in general that you don’t understand,” she said, then immediately wanted to bite her tongue. What had possessed her to say such a thing to him?

“I don’t pretend to try,” he said dryly, then cast a curious glance at her. “I know it’s none of my business, but those babies you were talking about earlier. Do they belong to one of your sisters? I remember Tomas mentioning one of his daughters having a son, but I don’t remember anything about twins.”

“That’s my sister Justine. She and Roy have a five-yearold son. The twins are—”

She hesitated, then quickly decided there wasn’t any
point in keeping the circumstances of the twins a secret from this man. She wasn’t ashamed of the twins. Of her father’s behavior, certainly. But never the twins. She couldn’t love them more.

She went on, “Back earlier in the summer, Justine found the twins on our front porch.”

“On your porch,” he repeated in disbelief. “That sounds like something in the movies.”

Sighing, Rose gazed at the shadowy clumps of sage and choya passing outside the open window. “I know. But it happens to be exactly what happened.”

Harlan’s mouth tightened to a grim line. “Who would do such a thing to innocent children?”

She glanced at him. “Sheriff Roy Pardee is my brotherin-law and since he’s been working on the case, he’s pretty much decided it was the mother. She was seen with the twins in Ruidoso on that very same day. It must have been her. But I guess he won’t be absolutely sure of that until he tracks her down.”

“He hasn’t found the mother yet?”

Rose shook her head. “So far she’s left a pretty cold trail to follow. But Roy is good at his job and I feel like he’ll find her soon.”

“Does he know who she is? What about the father?”

“The father is dead,” she said flatly.

He slowed the pickup and stared at her. “Dead? How do you know that?”

She swallowed. “Because Tomas, my father, is also the father of the twins.”

Harlan couldn’t believe it. Tomas had only become a widower late last year. Was Rose telling him the old man had been having an affair?

He stopped the pickup in the middle of the dirt road and killed the motor. “Rose, surely I didn’t hear you right.
Tomas, your father, is also the father of the babies left abandoned on your front porch?”

She sighed wearily. The day had been exhausting and she was still feeling like a genuine fool over that kiss. She was hardly in the mood to discuss her father’s lack of morals, but since she’d already told him part of the story, she couldn’t very well hold back the rest. He’d been a friend to Tomas, he’d lent him money when he needed it. If anyone had the right to know what had happened, she supposed Harlan did.

“For a while we didn’t know who or where the twins belonged,” she said quietly. “We knew the babies were redheaded like myself and my sisters. And some people even remarked that they resembled us, but we didn’t know anyone with twin babies. We thought it was all just coincidence and that someone had randomly chosen the Bar M as a place to drop the babies.”

“How did you find out? About your father, I mean,” he asked gently.

“I was going through some of the ranch’s canceled checks and discovered several my father had written at a certain time each month. All the checks were for a large amount and the name of the payee had been left blank. And to make things even more suspicious, the endorser never put a name, just a deposit only. But thankfully the number of the account the money was deposited into was stamped on the back. And from that Roy was able to find a name and eventually the birth records of the twins in Las Cruces. Tomas was listed as the father and we have no reason to doubt that. Since the twins have grown over a few more months, they’re beginning to look even more like Murdocks.”

Harlan couldn’t imagine what a shock it must have been for Rose to find out the twins were actually her siblings. Had the whole thing made her hate her father?

“Why do you think Tomas was writing those checks? For child support?”

Rose shrugged. “We don’t know for sure. He obviously didn’t want us knowing about the twins and since the mother never made any sort of contact with us beforehand, we think she was blackmailing our father—to keep quiet about giving birth to his children.”

Harlan’s head swung slowly back and forth. “This is all—so incredible. Tomas was a fine man. There were times he offered to help me when I didn’t even ask. I can’t imagine him getting off on such a wrong track.” He looked at Rose and tried to imagine what she’d been coping with these past months. A lesser woman would have already crumbled under the weight, he realized. “I suppose this was why your father came to me for money. The whole thing must have broken him.”

Rose leaned her head against the back of the seat. She looked so tired and defeated that Harlan wished he hadn’t asked her anything about the babies. Obviously, just talking about it had drained her.

“I shouldn’t have asked you,” he said after a moment “It was none of my business.”

Rose turned her large gray eyes on him and as he looked into their depths, he could see the pain and worry and exhaustion she was feeling. Harlan suddenly wanted to take her into his arms and rest her head against his shoulder. He wanted to stroke her hair and tell her everything would eventually be all right. But it wasn’t his place to comfort her and more than likely she’d be the first one to tell him so.

“I don’t feel that way, Harlan. You loaned Daddy money. You’re entitled to know what he wanted it for. Besides, I knew if Emily came to the ranch and met the babies, she’d want to know something about them. What shall I tell her?”

Rose’s question caused his brows to lift. “What do you mean?”

“Emily is thirteen. She might not understand about an older married man having an affair.” She stopped and covered her face with both hands. “What am I saying? I’m twenty-eight and I don’t even understand it myself.”

She was twenty-eight. Harlan was surprised. She looked much younger. And as far as he knew, she’d never been married. For the life of him, he couldn’t figure why. Rose was a lovely, alluring woman. Even under her dusty work clothes and boots he could see that. Did she simply not like men because her father had turned out to be an adulterer? No, he didn’t think so. That wouldn’t account for all these years she lived a single life. Besides, she’d kissed him and he hadn’t tasted a bit of dislike on her lips.

“Whatever Emily asks about the twins, tell her the truth. She’s old enough to know that the world isn’t always a nice place. And I’ve tried to teach her that, if they’re not careful, people of any age can make bad mistakes.”

Rose dropped her hands to her lap, looked at him, and tried her best to smile. “I think—you’re a good father, Harlan.”

It was the last thing he was expecting her to say. The compliment both surprised and pleased him. “Thank you, Rose. I try.”

He started the engine and headed on to the Bar M. For the rest of the drive, Rose closed her eyes and tried to put Harlan out of her thoughts. But that was about as successful as her turning night into day. She owed the man money. That troubled her. But not nearly as much as the unfamiliar feelings stirring inside her. She was letting herself get closer to Harlan. She was even beginning to like him. And that terrified her.

A few minutes later they arrived at the ranch and Rose directed Harlan to circle around to the back of the house.
As soon as he parked at the gate entering the courtyard, Rose reached for the doorhandle.

“Thank you for the lift, Harlan,” she said, her eyes fixed safely on her lap. “And don’t worry yourself about getting Pie back tomorrow. Just drop him by whenever you have the chance. I’ll pay you for whatever feed you give him.”

His door opened and she glanced over to see him climbing out to the ground. Bemused, she watched him skirt the front of the cab, then open her door.

“You won’t pay me anything for horse feed,” he said, then raised his arm toward her. “Put your hand on my arm.”

She frowned. “What?”

“Put your hand right here,” he ordered while tapping his forearm. “I’m going to walk you to the door.”

“That isn’t necessary. I’m fine now.”

“Maybe so. But this way I’ll know you made it to the house without collapsing.”

Rose had never collapsed in her life and she certainly didn’t want Harlan thinking she was weak. For some foolish reason, she wanted him to see her as a strong, confident woman. Yet he seemed to want her to lean on him and that idea went straight to Rose’s heart.

Reaching out, she curled her fingers over his thick forearm. At once, she was struck by the warmth of his skin, the tickle of body hair, the hardness of his muscles.

Her heart lurched, then went into a mad gallop as she slid from the seat to stand beside him.

“I guess I am a little tired,” she told him. But she didn’t feel it. When she was close to him, touching him, her whole body buzzed with excitement. It didn’t make sense.

Except for a faint night-light burning in the kitchen, the back courtyard was dark as the two of them slowly made their way toward the house. As they walked, Harlan was acutely aware of Rose’s small hand on his arm. It had been
years since a woman had touched him or needed him in a physical way. To have Rose leaning on him swelled his chest with inexplicable emotions.

The night had grown late and nothing was stirring except a soft breeze whispering in the pines. Rose was very aware of the quietness as the two of them stepped onto the porch.

“Here you are,” he said.

“Yes. Well…good night, Harlan.”

His hand closed over hers, preventing Rose from stepping away from him. Her eyes lifted to the shadowy lines of his face and her heart slowed to a heavy thud, thud.

“Rose, I—” he paused and his fingers pressed her hand even tighter against his arm. “I just wanted to say that…when you first told me about your financial problems, I was skeptical. I knew your father needed money last year, but I didn’t think it was…well, I thought you and your sisters might be the sort who liked to live—” he broke off awkwardly.

“Above our means,” she finished dryly.

A sheepish expression on his face, he said, “Something like that. And I feel bad about it now.”

She looked down at the toes of their dusty boots. His were wide and rounded, hers narrow and pointed. They were very nearly touching. So were their thighs and hips and the whole idea made it hard for Rose to breathe.

“You shouldn’t apologize for that, Harlan. You don’t know me or my sisters, or how we live.”

No, he hadn’t known much about the Murdock daughters, but he was quickly learning about this one, he thought. And the more he learned, the more he was drawn to her.

“But I knew your father,” he persisted. “At least, I thought I knew him. It’s hard to believe he would have left his family in such financial trouble.”

Rose looked up at him and was surprised to find something like sadness on his face. When Harlan had called
Tomas his friend, he must have truly meant it, Rose thought. “Daddy was only fifty-three. I don’t think he planned on dying and leaving things the way he did. I believe he thought he’d eventually make the money back and none of us would ever be aware of his problems.”

“He must have been living under a hell of a load,” Harlan said thoughtfully.

“I’m sure it’s what killed him. The stress of it all. Of course his cigarettes and fondness for Kentucky bourbon didn’t help matters.”

Tomas Murdock had liked to play the horses. Harlan had been aware of that. But apparently the older man’s playing hadn’t stopped at just horses. Now Rose and her sisters were paying for his sins. It wasn’t fair, or right. But what could Harlan do about it?

“I’m sorry, Rose. Really sorry.”

She closed her eyes and as Harlan studied her pale face, it was all he could do not to crush her against his chest and bury his face in her hair. The urge didn’t make sense to Harlan. After the death of his wife, he’d vowed never to marry or even allow himself to love again. So why was this woman making him feel things he didn’t want to feel?

“I didn’t tell you all this to gain your sympathy,” she murmured.

“No. But I’m glad you did,” he said softly.

Her eyes fluttered open just in time to see his face drawing near. Her mouth opened in surprise but she didn’t have time to get the word
no
past her lips. Suddenly he was kissing her. Again.

Rose couldn’t help herself. She clung to him, tasted him, then sighed when he finally lifted his head and gently trailed his finger down her cheek.

“Good night, Rose.”

Too shaken to speak, Rose watched him disappear into the darkness.

“Good night, Harlan,” she whispered brokenly.

A
few moments later Rose pulled herself together and went into the house. All was quiet as she walked through the dark living room, then down the hallway toward her bedroom.

“Rose?”

The whispered sound of her name had Rose pausing, then glancing in the open doorway of the nursery. A soft night-light illuminated Chloe’s silhouette.

“Yes, it’s me. Are they both asleep?” she asked as she tiptoed into the twins’ room.

Chloe turned away from the white wooden cribs. “I just put them down. I think they crawled across the living room thirty times before they finally wore down.”

“They like being mobile,” Rose said with a weary smile. “Just wait until they start walking.”

Chloe chuckled softly. “Look out, Aunt Kitty. She’ll probably drop ten pounds.”

“By then I expect we’ll have to hire someone to help her. Aunt Kitty might be young and agile for her sixty-two
years, but chasing after two toddlers would be hard on a woman of any age.”

Chloe glanced over her shoulder at the sleeping babies. “I know. I just hope by then we can come up with the money for extra help.” She looked back at her sister. “Speaking of help, where have you been?”

Out on the porch kissing our neighbor, Rose thought wildly. Aloud she said, “Harlan just brought me home. It was dark by the time we finished moving the cattle. And then his daughter wanted me to stay and eat pizza.”

Chloe’s brows shot up. “And you did?”

Rose took Chloe by the shoulder and guided her out of the nursery. “It would have been unneighborly to have refused, don’t you think?”

She headed down the hallway to her bedroom and Chloe walked along with her.

“I don’t know about that. But it surprises me that you stayed to have supper with someone you hardly know. Especially when you told me last night that Harlan—what was it?” She thoughtfully tapped a finger against her chin. “He bothered you.”

Rose spread her hands in a helpless gesture. “Well, he does bother me.” Dear Lord, he did more than bother her, she thought, he’d taken total control of her senses. “But Emily was a big help moving the cattle today and she practically begged me to stay and eat.”

“Hmm,” Chloe mused aloud, “you must like the girl.”

Rose entered her bedroom with Chloe still close on her heels. “I do. Her mother has been dead since she was a little thing and it’s just been her and her daddy ever since.”

“How sad for her.”

“Very.”

“And sad for Mr. Hamilton, too,” Chloe added.

Rose tossed her hat onto a stuffed armchair, then in spite
of her dusty clothes and boots, sank wearily onto the bed. “Losing a spouse would be more than sad.”

“I wonder why he’s never married again? I’m sure there’re plenty of women out there who’d jump at the chance to be his wife.”

Rose shot her sister an annoyed look. “What makes you say that? You don’t even know the man.”

“I’ve seen him around before. He’s quite a man.”

“You know that just by looking at him?” Rose asked dryly.

“I talked to the man once when he was visiting Daddy. He’s mighty easy on the eyes and he has one of those drawls that give you goose bumps on the inside.”

So Rose wasn’t by herself when it came to being affected by Harlan Hamilton’s charms, she thought. “So why didn’t you flirt with him? He might have decided to change his single status.”

Chloe’s mouth fell open. “Rose! I can’t believe you said that to me!”

Rose couldn’t believe it, either. But she hadn’t been herself these past two days. Maybe the drought and heat and work had all finally gotten to her. She had to think that’s all it was.

Lying back against the pillows, Rose closed her eyes. “Why? You just said the man was very attractive. And you’re young and beautiful and single.”

Groaning, Chloe sat down on the edge of the bed. “My horses don’t allow me any time for romance. And even if I wasn’t busy with them, I’m not so sure I could get interested in any man. Not after the things Daddy did to mother and us. Anyway,” she added with a dismissive wave of her hand, “Mr. Hamilton is probably ten years my senior.”

Rose opened her eyes. “I told Harlan about Daddy and the twins.”

For a second time Chloe’s jaw dropped with shock. “You told him! All of it?”

Rose nodded. “I felt we owed it to him. He lent Daddy all that money. And you and I both know what he did with it. Every cent was given to Belinda Waller.”

“That’s true enough,” Chloe agreed with a grimace. “But I can’t imagine you sharing such a private thing with Harlan Hamilton.”

“Whether we like it or not, the man is a part of our lives now, Chloe. At least until we’re able to pay him back. But aside from all that, his daughter Emily is going to be coming over here to the ranch from time to time. She needed to know and understand how the twins came to be here with us.”

Chloe’s brows shot up. “His daughter is going to be coming here? Why?”

“She plans on helping me with whatever I need to get done.”

“You can’t pay her!”

A wan little smile curved Rose’s lips. “She doesn’t want pay. She wants companionship. I hope you’ll be nice to her.”

Chloe appeared properly offended by her sister’s remark. “I’m nice to everyone.”

Rose gave her younger sister a skeptical glance.

“Okay, almost everyone,” Chloe conceded, then pressed her hand over Rose’s. “It’s getting late and you look beat. Would you like me to run you a bath?”

“I don’t know that I have enough strength for a bath. I think I’ll do well just to get these clothes off.”

“Oh Rose,” Chloe scolded, “you can’t keep this up. You can’t do the work of five or six men. It’s killing you!”

Rose gave her sister a weary, lopsided smile. “Look who’s talking.”

Chloe shook her head. “My work is confined to the stable. You’re trying to oversee thousands of acres!”

“And you’re trying to help Aunt Kitty with the twins. Believe me, Chloe, it all equals out. Besides, today was out of the ordinary.”

“Yeah, thanks to Mr. Hamilton.” She got up from the bed and reached for Rose’s boots. As she tugged them off she said, “I hope this keeps the man satisfied for a while. But I’m afraid he’s eventually going to want more from us Murdocks than just water for his cattle.”

Rose sighed and wiggled her bare toes. “If he does, we’ll just have to try to give it to him. I don’t know what else we could do.”

Chloe snorted. “I’ll tell you something, Rose, I’ll be damn glad when we get ourselves out of this mess. I don’t like being at the mercy of any man’s whims. When it all boils down to the bottom of the pot, a man is going to take care of his wants first and to hell with anybody else.”

Rose made a tsking noise with her tongue. “You’re becoming jaded, Chloe.”

“I’ve got a right to.” She sniffed as she gave the belt on her bathrobe a hard jerk. “Just like you’ve got a right to despise men. After what Peter did to you, it’s a wonder you didn’t want to go into a convent!”

“Dear Lord, Chloe, I have enough on my mind without you bringing him up.”

Chloe heaved out a breath, then shook her head with regret “You’re right. I’m sorry, Rose. It’s just that I get so angry when I think about everything that’s happened.” Her expression softening, she bent down and kissed her sister’s cheek. “Let’s go to bed and try to forget about all of it. At least for tonight.”

“That’s exactly what I’m going to do. Good night, sis.

*   *   *

More than an hour later Rose lay in her bed, exhausted yet still wide awake. No matter how hard she tried to quiet her mind, it continued to spin. And it was all Harlan’s fault. He should have never kissed her in the first place, much less a second time!

Her fingers drifted to her lips as the taste of him lingered in her thoughts. After all these years, she’d never dreamed that a man’s kiss or touch would affect her like this. She was frigid and had been ever since her one and only engagement had ended eight years ago.

She’d met Peter during her second year of college at Eastern New Mexico State. He’d been blond and good-looking. Flirty and outgoing. The exact opposite of Rose’s quiet personality. She supposed the difference was what had first attracted her to him. Yet beneath his looks and personality, he’d been a dedicated student working toward a degree in medicine. In short, he’d been everything a young woman looked for in a fiancé and for a while Rose was blissfully dreaming of their future together.

With a little groan, she raised herself up in the bed and pushed her fingers through her tangled hair. She didn’t want to think about the pain she’d endured at Peter’s hands. But tonight she couldn’t seem to turn off her memories or the old fears that had stayed with her all these years.

She supposed in some ways, she still blamed herself for their tragic breakup. Peter had wanted sex from her and she’d been too young and innocent to give in before their marriage. The more he’d demanded, the more she’d resisted until it finally reached a point where their relationship was nothing but one big fight about sex.

The night Rose finally told Peter it was over between them, he’d gone into a rage. Once it was all over she’d been badly beaten and very nearly raped. The experience had frozen her, robbed her of her dreams of a loving husband and children.

But now Harlan had come along and kissed her as though
it had been a perfectly normal thing to do. And she’d responded as though she was a perfectly normal woman. But she wasn’t. She had to remember that. She had to remember she would never be a lover, a wife, a mother.

For the first time in weeks, Rose slept late the next morning. Although for most people, six-thirty would still be regarded as early, she considered it horribly lazy to lie in bed until after daylight.

She’d just showered and dressed in a clean pair of jeans and a pale blue shirt when she heard unfamiliar voices coming from the kitchen.

Quickly tying her hair back with a blue scarf, she hurried from her bedroom. Once she reached the open doorway to the kitchen, she came to an abrupt halt.

Harlan and Emily were sitting at the breakfast table and from the looks of things, Kitty had already served him a cup of coffee and a slice of cherry pie.

“Oh, there you are, Rose,” the older woman said as she spotted her niece. “I was just about to call you and let you know we have company this morning.”

“You shouldn’t consider us company, Kitty,” Harlan said as easily as if he’d known her for years.

Kitty smiled at him. “Then I’ll call you neighbors.”

His attention turned to Rose and a flush of heat filled her cheeks as she returned his gaze. She’d thought about the man half the night. To see him this morning, his face freshly shaven, his dark hair gleaming damply against his head was very disconcerting.

“Good morning, Rose.”

She nodded a greeting to him, then turned to Emily. “Good morning, Emily. You’re up early.”

“I wanted to come with Daddy when he dropped off your horse. Will it be all right if I stay and help you today?”

“Emily,” Harlan said to his daughter, “give Rose a chance to catch her breath. As tired as she was last night, she’s probably not going to do any work today.”

Kitty laughed with disbelief. “Rose not work? That’ll be the day!”

Ignoring her aunt’s comment, Rose took a seat across from Emily. “Of course it will be all right for you to stay. I have a pen of heifers that need to be tagged and vaccinated.”

“And then what?” Emily asked eagerly.

Rose smiled at the girl’s enthusiasm. “Oh, don’t worry. I’m sure we’ll find plenty to do,” she said, then darted a look at Harlan. She could see appreciation in his eyes and it filled her with a strange warmness. He obviously wanted his daughter to be happy and that in itself endeared the man to her.

“Are you going to eat breakfast now, Rose?” Kitty asked as she walked over to the cookstove. “I’ve got plenty of pancake batter left.”

Before Rose could reply, two loud wails sounded from the nursery down the hall.

“The twins are awake,” Kitty stated the obvious. “Would you go get them, Rose, while I make your breakfast?”

Rose excused herself and hurried down to the nursery. After quickly changing both babies’ wet diapers, she tucked Adam in the crook of her arm, then circled her other arm securely around Anna.

A few moments later when she entered the kitchen carrying both babies, Emily squealed with delight. “Oh, Daddy, look! Look how cute they are!”

The babies did resemble Rose and her sisters. And as Harlan gazed at the three of them, it was easy for him to imagine Rose as a mother, a baby of her own cradled in her arms. She was meant to love a man, a child. He could
easily see that about her. But apparently she couldn’t see it herself.

“May I hold one, Rose? I’ll be really careful!” Emily very nearly begged.

“Sure you may. I’ll let you hold Anna. She’s not quite as rowdy as her brother, Adam.”

Rose gently eased the baby girl down onto Emily’s lap. Anna immediately looked up at the teenager, then let out a loud, cooing laugh which prompted a giggle from Emily.

“Why don’t you give rowdy Adam to me?” Harlan spoke up. “It’s been a long time since I’ve held a baby, but I think I can handle him.”

Trying not to appear surprised, Rose handed Adam over to him. And as she watched him stand the baby up against his broad chest, it was easy to see he hadn’t forgotten how to be a daddy to an infant.

“Here you go, honey,” Kitty said to Rose as she plunked down a plate of hot pancakes. “You’d better eat them while we’ve got two baby-sitters.”

Rose murmured her thanks then took a seat and dug into her breakfast.

Across the table Emily gushed over the twins. “Gosh, they look so much alike! Do they cry a lot? Are they big enough to eat food?”

“They don’t cry too much,” Kitty answered as she pushed a cup of coffee at Rose, then sat down with a mug of her own.

“I imagine they can eat soft things,” Harlan told his daughter, then with the tip of his forefinger explored Adam’s gums. The baby immediately chomped down and Harlan let out a husky laugh. “Yeah, feels like he’s got a couple of teeth.”

Emily darted a curious look at her father. “I didn’t know you knew anything about babies, Daddy.”