Read The Parasol Protectorate Boxed Set Online
Authors: Gail Carriger
Tags: #Fiction / Science Fiction / Steampunk, Fiction / Fantasy / Contemporary, Fiction / Fantasy / Historical, Fiction / Romance / Fantasy, Fiction / Fantasy / Paranormal
Lady Maccon quickly served herself some haricot of veal and several apple fritters and began eating so the others about the
table could stop fussing and continue with their own meals. Really, sometimes it was simply too vexatious to be a lady living
with two dozen gentlemen. Not to mention the hundreds now encamped on the Woolsey grounds.
After only a moment to allow her husband's Beta to acclimatize to her presence, Lady Maccon struck. “Very well, Professor
Lyall, I shall bite: where has he gone now?”
The urbane werewolf said only, “Brussels sprouts?”
Lady Maccon declined in horror. She enjoyed most foods, but brussels sprouts were nothing more than underdeveloped cabbages.
Professor Lyall said, crinkling his paper, “
Shersky and Droop
are offering the most interesting new gadget for sale, just here. It is a particularly advanced form of teakettle, designed
for air travel, to be mounted on the sides of dirigibles. It harnesses the wind via this small whirligig contraption that
generates enough energy to boil water.” He pointed out the advertisement to Alexia, who was distracted despite herself.
“Really? How fascinating. And so very useful for those more frequent dirigible travelers. I wonder if⦔ She trailed off and
gave him a suspicious look. “Professor Lyall, you are trying to persuade me away from the point. Where has my husband gone?”
The Beta put down the now-useless newspaper and dished himself a fine piece of fried sole from a silver platter. “Lord Maccon
left at the crack of dusk.”
“That was not what I asked.”
On the far side of Lyall, Major Channing chuckled softly into his soup.
Alexia glared at him and then turned a sharp look onto the defenseless Tunstell, seated at the other side of the table among
the clavigers. If Lyall would not talk, perhaps Tunstell would. The redhead met her glare with wide eyes and quickly stuffed
his face with a large mouthful of veal, trying to look as if he knew absolutely nothing.
“At least tell me if he was dressed properly?”
Tunstell chewed slowly. Very slowly.
Lady Maccon turned back to Professor Lyall, who was calmly slicing into his sole. Lyall was one of the few werewolves she
had met who actively preferred fish to meat.
“Did he head off to Claret's?” she asked, thinking the earl might have business at his club before work.
Professor Lyall shook his head.
“I see. Are we to play at guessing games, then?”
The Beta sighed softly through his nose and finished his bite of sole. He put down his knife and fork with great precision
on the side of his plate and then dabbed, unnecessarily, at his mouth with the corner of his serviette.
Lady Maccon waited patiently, nibbling at her own dinner. After Professor Lyall had put the damask serviette back into his
lap and shoved his spectacles up his nose, she said, “Well?”
“He had a message this morning. I'm not privy to the particulars. He then swore a blue streak and set off northward.”
“Northward to where, exactly?”
Professor Lyall sighed. “I believe he has gone to Scotland.”
“He did
what
?”
“And he did not take Tunstell with him.” Professor Lyall stated the obvious in clear annoyance, pointing to the redhead who
was looking ever more guilty and ever more eager to continue chewing rather than participate in the conversation.
Lady Maccon worried at that information. Why should Conall take Tunstell? “Is he in danger? Shouldn't you have gone with him,
then?”
Lyall snorted. “Yes. Picture the state of his cravat without a valet to tie him in.” The Beta, always the height of understated
elegance, winced in imagined horror.
Alexia privately agreed with this.
“Could not take me,” muttered the Tunstell in question. “Had to go in wolf form. Trains are down, what with the engineer's
strike. Not that I should mind going; my play's finished its run, and I've never seen Scotland.” There was a note of petulance
in his tone.
Hemming, one of the resident pack members, slapped Tunstell hard on the shoulder. “Respect,” he growled without looking up
from his meal.
“Where, precisely, has my husband taken himself off to in Scotland?” Lady Maccon pressed for details.
“The southern part of the Highlands, as I understand it,” replied the Beta.
Alexia recovered her poise. What little she had. Which admittedly wasn't generally considered much. The southern Highland
area was the vicinity of Conall's previous abode. She thought she understood at last. “I take it he found out about his former
pack's Alpha being killed?”
Now it was Major Channing's turn to be surprised. The blond man practically spat out his mouthful of fritter. “How did
you
know that?”
Alexia looked up from her cup of tea. “I know many things.”
Major Channing's pretty mouth twisted at that.
Professor Lyall said, “His lordship did say something about dealing with an embarrassing family emergency.”
“Am I not family?” wondered Lady Maccon.
To which Lyall muttered under his breath, “And often embarrassing.”
“Careful there, Professor. Only one person is allowed to say insulting things about me to my face, and you are certainly not
large enough to be he.”
Lyall actually blushed. “All apologies,
mistress.
I forgot my tongue.” He emphasized her title and pulled his cravat down to show his neck ever so slightly.
“
We
are all his family! And he simply left us.” Major Channing seemed to be even more annoyed by Alexia's husband's departure
than she was. “Pity he didn't talk to me beforehand. I might have given him reason to stay.”
Alexia turned hard brown eyes on Woolsey's Gamma. “Oh yes?”
But Major Channing was busy puzzling over something else. “Of course, he might have known, or at least guessed. What
did
they get up to those months without an Alpha to guide them?”
“I don't know,” pressed Alexia, although his talk was clearly not directed at her. “Why don't
you
tell
me
what you were going to tell him?”
Major Channing started and managed to look both guilty and angry at the same time. Everyone's attention was on him.
“Yes,” came Lyall's soft voice, “why don't you?” There was steel there, behind the studied indifference.
“Oh, it is nothing much. Only that, while we were on the boat and for the entirety of the journey over the Mediterranean and
through the straits, none of us could change into wolf form. Six regiments with four packs, and we all grew beards. Basically,
we were mortal the whole time. Once we left the ship and traveled some ways toward Woolsey, we suddenly became our old supernatural
selves once more.”
“That is very interesting given recent occurrences, and you didn't manage to tell my husband?”
“He never had time for me.” Channing seemed angrier than she was.
“You took that as a slight and did not make him listen? That is not only stupid but could prove dangerous.” Now Alexia was
getting angry. “Is someone a little jealous?”
Major Channing slammed his palm down on the table, rattling the dishes. “We have only
just
arrived back after six years abroad, and
our
illustrious Alpha takes off, leaving his pack to go and see to the business of another!” The major practically spat the words
out in his self-righteousness.
“Yup,” said Hemming from nearby, “definitely jealous.”
Major Channing pointed a threatening finger at him. He had wide, elegant hands, but they were callused and rough, making Alexia
wonder what backcountry he had fought to tame in the years before he became a werewolf. “Take greater caution with your words,
runt. I outrank you.”
Hemming tilted his head, exposing his throat in acknowledgment of the threat's validity, and then proceeded to finish his
supper and keep his opinions to himself.
Tunstell and the rest of the clavigers watched the conversation with wide-eyed interest. Having the entire pack home was a
novel experience for them. The Coldsteam Guards had been stationed in India long enough for most of the Woolsey clavigers
to have never met the full pack.
Lady Maccon decided she had had enough of Major Channing for one evening. With this new information, it was even more urgent
she head into town, and so she rose from her chair and called for the carriage.
“Back into London again this evening, my lady?” wondered Floote, appearing in the hallway with her mantle and hat.
“Unfortunately, yes.” His lady was looking perturbed.
“Will you be needing the dispatch case?”
“Not tonight, Floote. I am not going as muhjah. Best to remain as innocuous-looking as possible.”
Floote's silence was eloquent, as so many of Floote's silences were. What his beloved mistress made up for in brains she lacked
in subtlety; she was about as innocuous as one of Ivy Hisselpenny's hats.
Alexia rolled her eyes at him. “Yes, well, I take your point, but there is something I am missing about last night's incident.
And now we know that whatever it was came into town with the regiments. I simply must see if I can catch Lord Akeldama. What
BUR did not uncover, his boys will have.”
Floote looked slightly perturbed by this. One eyelid fluttered almost imperceptibly. Alexia would never have noticed had she
not labored under twenty-six years of acquaintance with the man. What it meant was that he did not entirely approve of her
fraternization with the most outlandish of London's vampire roves.
“Do not alarm yourself, Floote. I shall take prodigious care. Pity I do not have a legitimate excuse for going into town tonight,
though. People will remark upon my break from the normal schedule.”
A timid feminine voice said, “My lady, I may be able to assist with that.”
Alexia looked up with a smile. Female voices were rare about Woolsey Castle, but this was one of the few commonly heard ones.
As ghosts went, Formerly Merriway was an amenable one, and Alexia had grown fond of her over the last few months. Even if
she was timid.
“Good evening, Formerly Merriway. How are you tonight?”
“Still holding myself together, mistress,” replied the ghost, appearing as nothing more than a shimmery grayish mist in the
brightness of the gas-lit hallway. The front hall was at the farthest end of her tether, so it was difficult for her to solidify.
It also meant her body must be located somewhere in the upper portion of Woolsey Castle, probably walled in somewhere, a fact
Alexia preferred not to think about and hoped fervently never to smell.
“I have a personal message to deliver to you, my lady.”
“From my impossible husband?” It was a safe guess, as Lord Maccon was the only one who would employ a ghost rather than some
sensible means of communication, like perhaps waking up his own wife and talking to her before he left for once.
The ghostly form swayed a bit up and down, Formerly Merriway's version of a nod. “From his lordship, yes.”
“Well?” barked Alexia.
Formerly Merriway skittered back slightly. Despite copious promises from Alexia that she was not going to wander about the
castle looking to lay hands on Merriway's corpse, the ghost could not get over her fear of the preternatural. She persisted
in seeing imminent exorcism behind every threatening attitude Alexia took, which, given Alexia's character, made for a constant
state of nervousness.
Alexia sighed and modified her tone. “What was his message to me, Formerly Merriway, please?” She used the hall mirror to
pin on her hat, careful not to upset Angelique's hairdo. It perched far to the back of the head in an entirely useless manner,
but as the sun was not out, Alexia supposed she did not have to mind the lack of shade.
“You are to go hat shopping,” said Formerly Merriway, quite unexpectedly.
Alexia wrinkled her forehead and pulled on her gloves. “I am, am I?”
Formerly Merriway gave her bobbing nod once again. “He recommends a newly opened establishment on Regent Street called Chapeau
de Poupe. He emphasized that you should visit it without delay.”
Lord Maccon rarely took an interest in his own attire. Lady Maccon could hardly believe he would suddenly take an interest
in hers.
She said only, “Ah, well, I was just thinking how I did not like this hat. Not that I really require a new one.”
“Well, I certainly know someone who does,” said Floote with unexpected feeling from just behind her shoulder.
“Yes, Floote, I
am
sorry you had to see those grapes yesterday,” Alexia apologized. Poor Floote had very delicate sensibilities.
“Suffering comes unto us all,” quoth Floote sagely. Then he handed over a blue and white lace parasol and saw her down the
steps and into the waiting carriage.
“To the Hisselpenny town residence,” he instructed the driver, “posthaste.”
“Oh, Floote.” Lady Maccon stuck her head out the window as the carriage wheeled off down the drive. “Cancel tomorrow's dinner
party, would you? Since my husband has chosen to absent himself, there is simply no point.”
Floote tipped his head at the retreating carriage in acknowledgment and went to see to the details.
Alexia felt justified in turning up on Ivy's doorstep without announcement, as Ivy had done that very thing to her the evening
before.
Miss Ivy Hisselpenny was sitting listlessly in the front parlor of the Hisselpennys' modest town address, receiving visitors.
She was delighted to see Alexia, however unexpected. The whole Hisselpenny household was generally elated to receive Lady
Maccon; never had they thought Ivy's odd little relationship with bluestocking spinster Alexia Tarabotti would flower into
such a social coup de grace.