The One Year Wisdom for Women Devotional: 365 Devotions through the Proverbs (38 page)

May 21

Adjusting Your Thought Life

     
The L
ORD
detests the thoughts of the wicked,

          
but those of the pure are pleasing to him.

Our proverb today presents a positive and a negative. This is a classic style of teaching often used in the Proverbs. It’s very effective, because when we see two choices side by side, it helps us realize our choices have consequences.

Today’s choice deals with our thought lives. God hates it when we fixate on and mull over thoughts that are wrong. It is wrong to dwell on lustful thoughts. It’s wrong to have thoughts of malice and revenge. Scientists tell us we think ten thousand thoughts a day, and quite to our dismay, all of us have wrong thoughts come to mind more than we wish.

One way to redirect our thoughts is to have a noble focus to occupy our attention. There is no better motto for life than “I must be about my Father’s business” (Luke 2:49,
KJV
). Even though Jesus had many things thrown at him, he always moved forward with clear, pure motives because he knew his life had purpose. He couldn’t waste time getting sidetracked even in his thought life. And neither can you. Pray today that God will give you a mission. Do you love kids or have a burden for the hurting? Are you drawn to the elderly, or teens, or unwed moms? Jump into serving in an area that captures your passion. Learn all you can about how to be more effective in your calling. Then when ugly thoughts come, you can just say, “Go away, I am busy with my Father’s business.”

Make It Personal . . . Live It Out!

Psalm 1:1-6 is an excellent Psalm to memorize. It paints a word picture regarding how our thoughts shape our actions, and then our life and then our destiny: “Blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked or stand in the way of sinners or sit in the seat of mockers. But his delight is in the law of the L
ORD
, and on his law he meditates day and night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither. Whatever he does prospers” (
NIV
).

One Year Bible Reading

1 Samuel 29:1–31:13; John 11:55–12:19; Psalm 118:1-18; Proverbs 15:24-26

May 22

Study How to Answer

     
The heart of the righteous studies how to answer,

     
But the mouth of the wicked pours forth evil.

I had a teacher who used to say, “Do not engage mouth before you engage brain.” Think before you speak. Better yet, in a delicate situation, pray before you speak. The more you do it, the more you will do it. It becomes a good habit.

This brings us to the whole topic of communication. Oh, how I wish we were all better communicators. Oh, how I wish we would learn to talk things out better. I really think a lot of our conflicts are because of misunderstanding, and since misunderstanding is just human, shouldn’t we learn to be better in our response to it? Let’s look at some principles to help us break bad communication habits.

• Don’t stuff and brood. Women are experts at this. We get our feelings hurt and we stuff it. We simmer under the surface. We overthink it. We then jump to the wrong conclusions. Ladies, let’s stop doing that.
  
• Let’s stop talking to everyone else, except the person involved. Nothing is solved by this. We just widen the circle of hurt. So let’s do go to the person involved first.
  
• Let’s do pray. Let’s do put ourselves in the other person’s shoes. Let’s do build bridges. And let’s do forgive.
  

In closing: “The heart of the righteous studies how to answer, but the mouth of the wicked pours forth evil.”

Make It Personal . . . Live It Out!

We can apply our lesson today to the need to study the person we are speaking to. This involves being an active listener. Pay attention, read body language, listen not just to the words, but the tone and emotions. Whether you are listening to your child, your mother, your boss, or a friend, try to hear people out. If you don’t understand, ask them to explain. Rephrase what you think they said, and say it back to them. As you listen, ask the Lord to show you what is going on in the other person’s life that is contributing to stress or anger.

Let’s Pray

Lord, help me to be a peacemaker. Calm my emotions when I feel hurt or threatened. Then when I do speak, let the words of my mouth please you.

One Year Bible Reading

2 Samuel 1:1–2:11; John 12:20-50; Psalm 118:19-29; Proverbs 15:27-28

May 23

Cheerful Joy

     
A cheerful look brings joy to the heart,

          
and good news gives health to the bones.

If you listen to a lot of news right now, you might start feeling pretty discouraged. What’s going to become of us if all these bad things keep happening? Well, Jesus lived in the real world, and the people he spoke to had plenty to worry about then, too. But this is what he said to them and to us: “In the world you will have tribulation, but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world” (John 16:33,
NKJV
).

In Philippians 4:4 the apostle Paul says, “Rejoice in the Lord always. Again I will say, rejoice!” (
NKJV
). But wait a minute, Paul. You’re writing from a prison cell in Rome. You are there because of trumped-up charges by mean, jealous people. Your traveling ministry has ended. You have nothing but the clothes on your back. And not to mention, you might be facing a death sentence.

So let’s listen to what he said again. “Rejoice in the Lord always.” That’s a really good word for us right now. Circumstances and people may let you down, but the Lord never will. God promised he will never leave you or forsake you (see Hebrews 13:5).

So if you’ve been dragging, if your children have seen you and your husband fighting and angry over money troubles, if your thought life has been consumed with fear, I have a great prescription for you. Open your Bible to Psalm 27:14: “Wait on the L
ORD
. Be of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart” (
NKJV
).

Make It Personal . . . Live It Out!

Laughter and joy can change a cloudy day. When our fourteen-year-old nephew started losing his hair from chemo, his father, grandpa, and uncle all shaved their hair together. They took some fun, silly pictures as the family rallied around him. When my friend Carolyn lost her hair, I went with her to try on wigs. There was one we couldn’t resist. It was long and very blonde, and we called it Lola. Silly fun and a blonde wig turned our day into a memory. Are you or someone you know having a cloudy day? A hot fudge sundae, holding a kitten at the pet store, or a cup of tea with a friend might be just what the doctor ordered.

One Year Bible Reading

2 Samuel 2:12–3:39; John 13:1-30; Psalm 119:1-16; Proverbs 15:29-30

May 24

Constructive Criticism

     
If you listen to constructive criticism,

          
you will be at home among the wise.

     
If you reject criticism, you only harm yourself.

Constructive criticism. Is there any such thing? I know most of us just cringe when someone says, “Could I talk to you for a moment?” Especially when we sense that it may be a little talk about something we’ve done wrong. Maybe this is because we have never had someone who truly loved us enough to come to us and speak truth into our lives, firmly and yet kindly. Most of us are cowards about speaking honestly to others, even when it is breaking our hearts to see them make serious mistakes. Through the years, I have lost a few friends by trying.

But mostly this proverb is addressed to us. We need to be receptive, eager to grow, and eager to repent when confronted with error in our lives. So how can this happen?

• Read God’s Word with personal receptivity. James 1:22 says, “Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says” (
  NIV
  ). Every morning I sense the Lord speaking to me. But some mornings, honestly, he has a good talking to me. Is it hard? Yes. Is it good? Yes. It is my heavenly Father, fathering me.
  
• When others criticize or correct you, keep your skin thick, but your heart soft. Dawson Trotman said, “There is a kernel of truth in every criticism. Look for it, and when you find it, rejoice in its value.”
  

Make It Personal . . . Live It Out!

Our best and most consistent source of constructive criticism will always be the Holy Spirit. Jesus told us that the Spirit’s job is bringing conviction for sin and guiding us into truth. So the message to you today is, will you listen? This is how it works: you hear a message on the radio about a topic and it convicts your heart. Then you hear the theme repeated in a message at church, a book someone recommends, a Scripture you read in the morning. God is talking to you. The best thing to do is simply say, “God, I hear you. Please open my ears so I understand and respond and repent. Thank you for loving me enough to not give up.”

One Year Bible Reading

2 Samuel 4:1–6:23; John 13:31–14:14; Psalm 119:17-32; Proverbs 15:31-32