The Notorious Nobleman (6 page)

It was several moments before he could force
himself to speak. He said, rather stiffly, “I’ve sent a messenger
to the vicarage to let them know you are here. Of course, if you
don’t care to wait for your friends to come and collect you, my
carriage is at your disposal.”

Julia took a few more steps into the room.
“Oh, I am perfectly content to wait for Harriet and her
husband.”

He turned his back to her then, and busied
his hands with the wine decanters. When he had poured out a glass
for her, he crossed the brief distance between them with a few easy
strides.

“
A mild ratafia,” he said, as she took
a sip. “Sit down, won’t you, and be comfortable.”

Julia shunned the stylish armchairs and sank
instead onto an overstuffed hassock drawn close in front of the
fireplace. “I probably shouldn’t drink this without having
something to eat first,” she said, ingeniously. “I am not at all
used to drinking wines.”

Gavin drew a chair forward and sat down with
his own glass cradled in his hands. “If you mean to enter society,
you shall have to develop a taste for the stuff. Surely you drink
wine with dinner at home.”

“
At the vicarage we are served nothing
stronger than a cider. Harriet’s husband fears he would set a poor
example if he were to imbibe.”

“
I am not at all surprised,” he said,
scornfully.

“
Please don’t speak cruelly of the
vicar. He has been very kind to me, you know.”

“
I can imagine he has
been

In between sermons on
the proper manner in which you must conduct yourself.”

“
I won’t allow you to think ill of the
Reverend Mr. Clouster. I owe him a tremendous debt. He allowed
Harriet to invite me into their home when no one else
would.”

“
And in exchange, you undoubtedly must
listen to him sermonize

“ He
stopped short, his attention arrested by what she had said. “When
no one else would?”

Julia’s chin went up a notch. “Very few
people, I discovered, are willing to take in a penniless
widow.”

“
Why did you not go home,
then?”

“
I have no home. As I told you, I have
nothing of value.”

“
Not even a home? I don’t believe it!
You were born to the manor!”

“
But I was not married from the manor,”
she countered, in an even voice that held not the least trace of
emotion, “and therein, you see, lies the mischief.”

Gavin smiled slightly as he realized, at
last, the meaning of her words. “Well, well, well! So the prim and
proper Lady Julia Pettingale was married over the anvil! I would
never have guessed it of you!”

She laughed softly. “Are you very much
shocked?”

“
I am indeed. And when I think of how
many times today I have listened to your maxims of propriety, I can
scarcely believe it!”

“
It is true, I’m afraid,” she said,
rather ruefully. “My father disapproved of the man I had chosen to
marry

with good reason I
discovered too late. But at the time, I was quite convinced that my
father was merely acting out of cruelty. I thought he opposed the
marriage simply because his pride was at stake; because I was the
only person who had ever dared to defy Sir Walter
Gardner.”

Gavin looked at her in surprise. “Your father
is Sir Walter Gardner? I’m a little acquainted with him. If I’m not
mistaken, he owns the finest stable in England.”

“
Have you bought one of his
horses?”

“
No, but he’s offered on several
occasions to buy one mine. He wants my grey, but I have no
intention of selling it to him. I must say, though, that he has
been tenacious in his offers.”

She smiled slightly. “My father can be very
persistent.”

“
And was he persistent in trying to
dissuade you from marrying?”

“
Yes, but I wouldn’t listen to him. The
day I left his house with William was the day my father pledged to
never see me again. He has been a man of his word.”

Julia thought that the passage of time would
have enabled her to speak of that long-ago day with perfect
equanimity; but no sooner had those words left her lips than she
was forcibly reminded of the last time she had seen her father. She
missed him and longed to see him, and she felt the disarming prick
of tears in the backs her eyes.

She fought against her betraying emotions by
forcing a smile and saying, “I had some jewels and some money of my
own that I had inherited from my mother when she died. I thought
that was all I needed in life and I eloped with William. As it
happened, William cared more for my money and jewels than he did
for me.”

Gavin favored her with a hard, probing stare.
“Are you telling me your husband squandered your inheritance?”

“
Every last groat, I’m
afraid.”

“
Your husband was a bounder,” he said,
bluntly.

“
He didn’t mean to be. Over the four
years of our marriage, William eventually took everything I had;
but he always thought he could win the money back, if only he had a
lucky turn of the cards or a bet on the right horse. But in the
end, only the men with whom he gambled at Watier’s
profited.”

“
Your husband was a member at
Watier’s?”

“
Yes, he was. Did you meet him there? I
would not be at all surprised if you did for the place was
practically a second home for him. He was quite good friends with
some of the members: Lord Elphinham and Mr. Dobney were two fast
friends of his.”

Gavin conjured up a vague recollection of an
eager young Tulip who had crossed his path at the club years
before. “He didn’t belong there, if he’s the chap I think he
is.”

“
I would have thought he could have
been a crony of yours,” said Julia, in some surprise. “He aspired
toward the Corinthian set and was quite horse-mad.”

“
Your husband was no more a crony of
mine than the man in the moon. Men like Elphinham and Dobney are
nothing more than Peep ’o Day boys who think it smart to get
swine-drunk and cause mischief. Your husband may have aspired to
the Corinthian set, but if he fell in with men such as Elphinham
and Dobney, it’s more like he found amusement in boxing the Watch,
kicking up larks and gambling his way into Dun
territory.”

Julia looked at him blankly. “And you don’t
do such things?”

“
You
do
have a poor opinion of me, don’t you?” he asked, in a voice
that was more amused than angry. “No, I do not do such
things.”

Julia looked away for a moment. At last she
said, very thoughtfully, “William was so intent upon aping any man
he thought of fashion, he never stopped to consider the
consequences."

“
You married a mere boy, Julia,” said
Gavin, his gaze intent upon her.

She decided she rather liked hearing him say
her name in that deep rumbling voice of his. There was a gentleness
in the way he said her name that she instinctively knew was more in
keeping with his natural way of speaking than all the gruff insults
and curses he had thrown at her earlier. She smiled slightly. “But
I, you see, at the time was a mere girl.”

His gaze traced the silhouette of her riding
habit. “You’re not a mere girl any longer.”

The tone of his voice left Julia feeling
suddenly a little breathless and a good deal disarmed. Her
intuition told her that he found her attractive. It had been a long
time since she had felt flattered by a man’s attentions. She didn’t
know if it was his unexpected compliment or his willing and
sympathetic ear that was her undoing, but once again she found
herself close to tears. She closed her eyes, trying to block out
any emotion, but it was too late. The tears were in her eyes before
she could halt them.

Gavin saw them and reacted without thinking.
He dropped to one knee on the floor in front of her and wrapped his
good arm about her to draw her against him. She didn’t resist. She
merely allowed him to hold her as her tears trailed slowly down the
soft planes of her face.

It had been a long time since he had held a
woman so tenderly. She was soft and pliant, and she smelled of
sweetness and violet water. She moved slightly and bumped his sore
arm, but he didn’t care. He would have let her bump it a hundred
times if it meant he could go on holding her.

But after only a moment in his arms, Julia
pulled away and dabbed at her moist eyes with the tips of her slim
fingers. “I am sorry! I cannot think what came over me! I haven’t
cried like that since I last saw my papa.”

“
Then perhaps it was time you
did.”

She looked quickly up at his face still
so close to hers, thinking she had detected a note of sarcasm in
his voice. “William took everything! Everything! Even my jewels
were sold to pay his horrid debts! And after all
that

after he took every last
item that was dear to me!

William died and now I am alone and . . .” Her
chin quivered threateningly and she fought to control
it.

“
Go home to your father, Julia,” said
Gavin, softly.

“
I cannot. He disowned me. When I left
his house, we said some hateful things to each other. He will never
take me in. Oh, I don’t suspect you can ever
understand!”

“
I expect I understand perfectly well,”
he said. “Merely because time has passed does not mean you cannot
still feel the pain of losing someone. Would you admit that is a
fair assessment?”

“
You
do
understand!” she said faintly, and she dipped her head to
hide the tears that again filled her eyes.

“
I’m not an idiot. Even though your
husband was a bounder, I suspect you loved him. Did
you?”

She looked up at him. “Did I what?”

“
My question was plainly spoke. Did you
love your husband?”

She shook her head sadly. “No. I thought I
did at first, but it didn’t take long for me to realize how
mistaken I was. I fell in love with the romance of being courted by
a handsome young man who wanted to marry me. But I did not love
him. Still, it no less difficult when he died. Without William, I
have no one.”

“
I know what it is like to be left
behind. Here

Let me get you
off the floor.”

He clasped her hand and drew her to her feet
beside him. When Julia looked up into his darkly guarded
expression, she felt a kinship with him, an unexpected bond. She
said, softly, “I am sorry you lost your wife.”

No sooner had those tender words left her
lips than his features hardened. “Don’t be,” he retorted, and he
crossed the room to the wine tray and poured out a fresh glass.

Undeterred, Julia said, softly, “Sometimes
grief can change a person’s character.”

He turned around to look at her. “Is
that what you think? That I was a good and honest man before I
married

And then
buried!

my wife? You
are
an innocent, Lady Julia
Pettingale! I have been a libertine and a sharp since I first cut
my teeth. Haven’t you heard? According to rumor, my behavior is so
depraved, even the vicar is fearful of consorting with
me!”

“
I
am not
afraid of you,” she said, simply.

“
Maybe you should be. My history with
women is far from sterling.”

“
I know nothing of that part of your
history. But if you are judging yourself harshly because your wife
died . . .”

“
It’s my fault she is dead,” he said,
as he watched for her reaction. “I am to blame for it as surely as
if I put my fingers about her throat.”

“
I cannot believe that of
you.”

“
I can hardly believe it of myself
sometimes. But years ago, when I was younger, I was the same sort
of bounder your husband had been. And when I
married

Again like your
husband

I didn’t change my
ways. I was still a Neck-or-Nothing and mad for sport. And then one
day I set my wife up on the seat beside me in my first perch
phaeton. The roads were icy

I
should have known

!” He
stopped short and set his mouth into a tight, grim line. After a
moment, he squared his shoulders and said, quite angry, “When the
phaeton overturned, I jumped clear, but her foot got caught in the
rug I had covered her with to keep her warm.”

“
That was an accident.”

“
An accident I caused. There! You may
now repeat with authority all the stories you have heard about
me!”

“
I don’t repeat gossip,” Julia said,
firmly. “I dare say the village is rife with stories that feature
you in some sort of scandalous behavior, but I would never believe
such stories if they were spoken to me. I am a very good judge of
character and I would judge you are not as unsavory a man as you
would wish me to believe.”

“
Is that so? We shall see if you may be
made to alter that opinion.”

He crossed the space between them with
purposeful strides that sent Julia’s nerves fluttering. Suddenly,
she was unsure whether she was safe alone with him or in
significant peril. She had only an instinct that he was, at heart,
an honorable man; but her instincts also told her that he fought
very hard to be otherwise.