The Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad Treasure Hunt (7 page)

When Judy and Stink finally fell asleep that night, visions of hourglasses danced in their heads.

The next morning, they dragged Dad out of bed as soon as they woke up. As he drove them to the old white house, Judy kept an eye out for Tall Boy and Smart Girl.

Stink checked Dad’s watch a hundred times. At last, a lady with ten hundred keys came to open the door. “You’re up early,” said the lady. “You must be treasure hunters.”

“Sure are,” said Dad. “Have you had many others?”

“Like maybe possibly a real tall boy?” said Stink. “And a girl who wears glasses and looks super-smart?”

“You’re my first customers,” said the lady.

Stink unrolled his rubbing of the gravestone with the hourglass and showed it to the lady with the red sash. “Is this it? Did we figure it out? Do we get any silver?”

“Yes, yes, and yes,” said the lady, handing over two silver pieces.

Stink dumped out all his coins on the counter. “Two, four, six . . . fifteen! All we need is one more. One!”

“Okay, Stink. I can count,” said Judy. “But we still have to figure out the last and final clue, and it’s the hardest. We only have till twelve noon.”

“Here you go,” said the lady, handing the clue to Judy.

“Let’s go back to the inn and get Mom. Then we can all go eat some breakfast,” said Dad.

“I’m not hungry,” said Stink. “Read it! Read it!” he cried. Judy read the clue:

“Spitballs and barnacles,” said Stink. “It doesn’t make sense. Sound, but no ears? A voice, but no tongue? Not possible.”

“Other stuff has a tongue,” said Judy. “Like sneakers.”

“But sneakers don’t have a voice,” Stink pointed out.

“Well — bells have rings, but they don’t have fingers.”

“Great. All we have to do is find a giant talking sneaker bell.”

“Or in your case, a Stinker Bell.” Judy cracked herself up.

“What about the crab’s right hand?” Stink asked. “It says, ‘Find the last silver at the crab’s right hand.’ Crabs don’t even have hands.”

“A crab’s right hand is a claw, Stink. A crab claw.”

“There are millions of crabs on this island, and they all have claws.”

“But there’s only one place called the Crab’s Claw,” said Judy, pointing to the map. “It’s a restaurant on Ocean View Road.”

“Suddenly I’m hungry,” said Stink. “Hungry as a shark.”

Before Judy and Stink could step inside the Crab’s Claw, out came another family. Tall Boy and Smart Girl! Judy said, “Hi.”

“Why did you say hi?” Stink asked when they sat down.

“It just popped out,” said Judy.

“Tall Boy and
Crab
Girl are beating our pants off. Did they look like they were just eating breakfast? Or searching for clues? What if they already found the gold and we’re too late?”

“Chill out, Curious George,” said Judy. “Believe me, if they found it, we’d know.” Judy dug through all the sugar packets at the table and found four with seashells for her collection.

“Let’s look for the last piece of eight,” Stink urged. “Scurvy Sam said it would be hard. But it has to be here — it just has to.”

“Order first,” said Mom.

Stink stared at the menu.

“This menu sure is crabby.”

“
You
sure are crabby,” said Judy.

“You’re crabbier,” said Stink.

“You’re crabbiest,” said Judy.

“You’re a she-crab,” said Stink.

“Well, you’re a he-crab,” said Judy.

The waiter asked, “What can I get for you folks this morning?”

“A glass of water, please,” said Stink.

“Me, too,” said Judy.

“Kids,” said Mom, “you have to eat.”

“Order cereal,” Judy told Stink. “That’s the fastest.”

While they waited for their food, Judy and Stink nosed around, searching for the last coin hidden in a crab’s claw. There were crabs hanging in nets on the walls. There were crabby curtains, crab-shaped mirrors, crab door knockers.

“There are ten hundred million crabs in this place,” said Judy.

But not one single piece of silver.

“I got it!” said Stink. “One time I saw this old movie called
Mysterious Island,
and these two guys, Ted and Ned or something, walk
right on top
of this evil giant crab under the sand. The crab attacks and grabs Ned —”

“How do you know it was Ned?”

“I’m just saying,” said Stink. “Anyway, listen. Ned screams while the other guy ties a rope around one of the giant crab’s claws. He flips the crab off a cliff and tosses him into a pool of super-boiling-hot water. And then they eat him.”

“Food’s here,” Dad called to them.

“So what’s your point?” Judy asked.

“My point is that there could be a giant crab hidden under the sand on this island, and in his right claw could be the silver coin. Why didn’t I think of it before?”

“Go figure,” said Judy.

On their way out, Stink asked, “Is this the right hand of the crab?”

“No, it’s the Crab’s Claw,” said the lady behind the counter.

“Are you by any chance an Assistant Pirate? Do you have a silver piece of eight hidden somewhere?”

“Not here, I’m afraid,” said the lady, shaking her head. “Sorry, kids.”

“So what’s next?” Dad asked when they got outside.

“Oops, I have to go back,” said Judy. “I forgot my sugar packets. And my place mat. I want to save it for my scrapbook.”

“Hurry up!” said Stink. “We’re almost out of time.”