The Lunatic's Curse (29 page)

‘And who exactly was that fellow in the other cell?’ asked Rex.

‘I found this caught on the door,’ said Hildred, and she showed him the piece of red cloth.

‘That looks like part of a warder’s uniform,’ said Rex, but Hildred didn’t answer. She took one final right turn and they found themselves in a small chamber where the
tunnel had widened. On the floor propped against the opposite wall was a bleached skull.

They looked at each other with mounting excitement. ‘My tattoo is in the shape of a skull,’ said Rex quietly.

Hildred picked it up and examined it. ‘It’s just a skull,’ she said.

‘Maybe it’s some sort of marker,’ suggested Rex. ‘Maybe there’s something buried here.’

Feverishly they both began to dig. The earth came up easily, damp as it was, and before too long Hildred’s broken nails scratched across something that wasn’t sand or grit or
dirt.

It was the front of a large brown book.

‘It’s one of those record books,’ said Rex. ‘Like the ones they burned and you found. But why would my father hide a record book?’

42

Rex sat beside Hildred with the lantern while she dusted off the cover.

‘Hold the light closer,’ she said, and began to turn the pages. ‘It’s just like the others,’ she said, ‘with lists of the patients and their cures . .
.’

‘Look for Ambrose Grammaticus,’ said Rex, and he watched as Hildred ran her fingers up and down the columns on each page. Then her face visibly paled.

‘What is it?’ asked Rex anxiously. ‘Have you found my father? What does it say?’

‘It’s not your father, Rex,’ she said slowly. She pointed halfway down the column and there, written in black ink, with their dates of admission, as clear as day, were three
names:
Ida Runcible
,
Walter Freakley
and
Gerulphus Godsacre.

‘Fingerknots!’ exclaimed Hildred. ‘They were admitted over a decade ago!’

Rex sat in stunned silence. ‘I don’t understand,’ he said eventually. ‘How can they be patients?’

‘There can only be one explanation,’ said Hildred. Rex could see fear in her eyes. ‘All three of them are lunatics.’

‘Lunatics? But they can’t be. They work here.’

‘Who says? We’ve only ever had their word for it. Listen to this.’ Hildred had flicked over the page and began to read aloud. ‘
Ida Runcible: Ida worked as a cook for a
wealthy Opum Oppidulum family. After some months she took against her employers for reasons unknown
,
and poisoned the whole family with toxic fish,
Salpa salpa
, a type of noxious
bream found in Lake Beluarum. In small amounts it induces temporary insanity, in larger amounts certain death. When questioned she said the tea leaves told her to do it. Prognosis: Not expected to
be cured.
’

‘Toxic fish?’ said Rex, thinking of the fish she had been cooking the other day. ‘What about Walter Freakley?’

Further down the page Hildred came to his entry. ‘
Walter Freakley: after being rejected for a job on the river Foedus in Urbs Umida, Walter attacked and killed a boatman and commandeered
his boat. He posed as a ferryman for nearly two weeks, robbing his passengers and turning them into the water. When questioned he said that he was the reincarnation of Charon, ferryman of the dead,
and that he believed the Foedus to be the river Styx, the mythical river between the real world and that of the dead. Prognosis: Not expected to be cured.
’

‘And here’s Gerulphus. He was admitted before the other two.’

Rex listened incredulously. ‘Oh my, this is truly dreadful! I can’t believe it! They’re all mad.’

‘It must have been when the lunatics escaped recently,’ said Hildred, thinking quickly. ‘For some reason the three of them stayed behind.’

‘Well, Freakley likes boats, so he became the ferryman. But what happened to the real ferryman?’ Hildred and Rex exchanged glances. Knowing what they now knew about Walter, they had a
good idea. ‘That explains why he couldn’t row straight!’ said Rex grimly.

‘And Ida Runcible was a cook before she went mad,’ said Hildred. ‘Remember, she complained about not having any tea. It was because she was under lock and key that Chapelizod
didn’t allow them to have tea. It was bread and water. As for Gerulphus . . .’

‘We’re lucky to be alive,’ said Rex, shaking his head. ‘We’ve been living side by side with crazed murderers!’

Hildred frowned. ‘But this still doesn’t explain why your father hid the book.’

‘Let me see,’ said Rex, and he took the book and flicked on through the pages. ‘It only covers the first six months of that year,’ he said. There wouldn’t be
anything about my father.’

‘There’s something at the end,’ said Hildred, and she pulled a piece of newspaper out from between the last two pages. ‘It’s an old article from the
Hebdomadal
. It’s about another breakout. Hold up the light.’

She began to read.

BREAKOUT AT DROPROCK ASYLUM

It is now a week since three dangerous lunatics escaped from Droprock Asylum. The superintendent and the head warder are missing, presumed dead, and still there is no trace of
the escapees. By now they have probably changed their names and tried to alter their appearances but each has a distinctive feature which the mayor and the constables hope will aid in their
capture. We at the
Hebdoma
dal
have been asked to warn the public not to approach these people as they are a danger both to themselves and to others and will stop at nothing in their
bid for freedom.

The descriptions of the three are as follows:

Gerulphus Godsacre:

A huge man, grossly overweight, sent to the asylum by his parents who claimed that he was

Meredith Whipspittle:

Ms Whipspittle is described as an uncommonly pretty young woman, but do not be fooled: she is a devil in disguise. Her mind is incurably disturbed. She was incarcerated in the
asylum after the suspicious deaths of her two husbands. She claims to be at least ten years younger than she is. Although she has the social skills to pass as a normal member of society, indeed she
has the ability to mix in all circles, she can be identified by one distinctive feature: the little finger on her right hand is permanently rigid and cannot be bent.

Claude Boughton:

Thought to be the ring-leader, and an extremely persuasive character, Mr Boughton is afflicted by a number of conditions. He is certainly delusional: he likes to refer to himself as Doctor although he has no medical qualifications at all. He also claims to be able to control minds. He
suffers from
Tetragonocephalitis
and exhibits the classic head shape of the disease, namely an overtly square jaw and skull, caused when the brain swells in all directions and distorts the
cranium.

‘Stop!’ said Rex. ‘This is even worse than I thought.’

Hildred stopped reading.

‘Meredith and Claude, they’re Acantha and Tibor, it has to be. The square head, the stiff finger. They’ve changed their names but they were in here too!’

‘There’s more,’ said Hildred. ‘
Far from being a healer, Claude Boughton is actually a convicted murderer. He was committed to the asylum after the remains of his
parents were found buried under the floorboards of his house. Both he and Meredith Whipspittle were also accused (but not convicted) of being active An-dro-phagues
.’

Hildred stumbled slightly over the last word.

‘An-dro-phagues?’ repeated Rex. ‘Now why does that word seem familiar?’

‘Say it again,’ said Hildred. ‘Slowly.’

Rex repeated it twice. ‘Androphague, Andrew Phague—’

‘Andrew Faye
,’ finished Hildred.

Rex was stunned into silence.

‘It’s not the Society of Andrew Faye,’ said Hildred. ‘It’s the
Society of Androphagues
.’

‘But what is an Androphague?’

Hildred looked thoughtful. ‘When I was with the Panopticon—’

‘Don’t tell me,’ said Rex, ‘did you have an
Androphague
? What did he do?’

Hildred didn’t seem to hear, or else she ignored his interruption, and continued. ‘Mr Ephcott taught me many things. A little Latin, a little Greek, philosophy, logic –’
that explains so much, thought Rex – ‘I believe that this word could have its origins in Greek.
Andros
means “man” and
phagein
is the verb “to
eat”.’

‘Oh,’ said Rex. ‘Then it means “a man who eats?”’

‘No,’ said Hildred softly. ‘It means “man-eater”.’

‘Man-eater?’

‘Yes.’

Rex saw that the book was shaking in Hildred’s hands. He looked into her eyes. Time seemed to slow. He finally understood.

‘Rex,’ said Hildred softly. ‘Tibor and Acantha were accused of being cannibals. They thought he ate his parents.’

Rex staggered backwards. He felt as if his heart had stopped, as if he had been punched in the stomach, as if something had been torn out of him. Wordlessly he dug deep into his pocket. ‘I
think it was these trousers,’ he muttered. He pulled out his hand and held up a small gold object.

‘What is it?’ asked Hildred.

‘It’s a gold tooth,’ said Rex. ‘But not from a fish. I think it’s Chapelizod’s.’

‘How do you know?’

‘It’s initialled.’ And indeed it was, quite clearly: ‘C.C.’

Hildred examined the small object carefully. ‘But where did you get it?’

‘I found it in the bottom of the cooking pot at Acantha’s.’

‘Now
I
don’t understand,’ said Hildred.

Rex’s eye welled up with tears. ‘Oh, Hildred,’ he said, ‘I think those monsters ate Cadmus Chapelizod.’

Hildred started shaking her head. ‘But, Rex, if Acantha was a cannibal, what does that mean about—’

‘My father? You tell me,’ he said, and he began to laugh hysterically.

‘Calm down,’ said Hildred firmly, trying to hide her own fear. ‘This can’t be true. Your father was a good man taken in by a very wicked woman.’

Rex stopped laughing but he was far from calm. ‘I can see it now,’ he said with an odd smile. ‘Cecil Notwithstanding warned Father about Chapelizod, that’s why he told
Acantha not to see him any more, but Acantha refused. And then she fed him the poisonous fish – she said it was bream – just enough to send him mad. She might even have got the idea from
Mrs Runcible. They were in the asylum at the same time. I remember now, she didn’t eat hers. It was perfect. Chapelizod, the superintendent of the asylum, declares him insane; Stradigund, the
helpful solicitor, does the legal paperwork. And of course, they’re both cannibals too. As for that pest controller, it wasn’t meat he was delivering, it was
people.
’

‘Well, that is meat, I suppose,’ said Hildred, in such a state of shock she was hardly aware of what she was saying. ‘Oh Lord, do you suppose he’s the one taking the
beggars?’

‘Yes,’ said Rex grimly. ‘That’s exactly it. Acantha laughed about it, she called them pests, but
that’s who they were eating
. And then somehow the pest
controller must have caught Chapelizod and he ended up in the pot.’

They were both silent as the deeply disturbing revelations sank in.

‘But your father,’ said Hildred carefully. ‘When he came back that night, to warn you, to get you away from her. He can’t have been a can— one.’

Rex was increasingly agitated. ‘Acantha said that he liked her cooking.’

‘That doesn’t prove anything,’ said Hildred hesitantly. ‘He saved you. Surely that’s what’s important?’

‘But he couldn’t save himself,’ said Rex. He turned to Hildred. His face was as stone, his voice hoarse, like gravel.

‘Do you want to know what really happened to his hand? Do you?’

‘Rex, you’re scaring me,’ said Hildred as she looked into his burning eyes.

‘He didn’t lose it in an engineering accident.’

‘Then what?’ she asked in a shaky voice.

Rex looked directly at her and with his shorn head and his wild eyes he looked more like a madman than anyone else in the asylum. He opened his mouth and hissed through gritted teeth, ‘He
ate it, Hildred. My father ate his own hand!’

And then he collapsed in a quivering heap on the floor.

43