The Love Triangle (BWWM Romance) (8 page)

When I got to the car, Grace was in the passenger seat with Claudia in the back. Grace stared out of the window at nothing. I popped a mint into my mouth to hide the alcohol smell, and got into the car.

“We’ll have you comfortable in no time,” I said. She nodded and I pulled into the street. I knew that it wasn’t really much of a victory. She was sick and she needed help. But I couldn’t help but feel that I’d won.

Chapter 8 - Justin

The drive to Dayton took almost two hours. I drove it twice a week, and whenever else I could get time off work and Evelyn didn’t need me. No one else knew what I did in Dayton. I hadn’t told anyone because they hadn’t asked.

I hadn’t told anyone except Evelyn because I wasn’t even sure what this was. And until I knew, I didn’t want to make it something it wasn’t.

Dayton was a lot bigger than Fort Atkinson. Being here made me feel like I could disappear. The people didn’t know everyone else on the street. There were no neighbors that could spread gossip. It was very impersonal, very anonymous. And perfect for someone who didn’t know what he was doing anymore.

I parked in front of the large stucco house with arched windows and balconies on the second floor. The house was painted a warm beige with a red tiled roof and plants climbing up against the walls.

Alice came out before I slammed the truck door. She’d been expecting me. She wrapped her arms around my neck and kissed me. Her blonde hair tickled my nose and she smelled like apples and women’s perfume. I breathed in deeply and held onto her a second longer than I needed to before I let go.

“I’ve waited for you all week,” she said and smiled. Her eyes were a dazzling green and sometimes looking into them made me dizzy.

“I know, it’s been a bit rough,” I said. I hadn’t been to see her since I’d heard about Grace being in the hospital. I may have been dating Alice now, but the moment Grace’s name came up, everything else fell away. Was it wrong? Yes. Could I stop it? No. Was I going to try? Probably not

“Is it sorted out now?” Alice asked.

No. Not at all. She still doesn’t want me. But I didn’t say that. I was with Alice now. I was trying to move on. The fact that the opposite had happened for Grace couldn’t get to me as much as it was. Alice was the attempt to forget about the past, to move on, to let go of what I couldn’t change and to find happiness somewhere else.

The problem was that now suddenly it felt like it was something I might still be able to change. That was one of the things that were really getting to me. The fact that something that had been final suddenly wasn’t anymore, but it was a repetition, not something new.

“Perfectly fine,” I lied and smiled to back it up. She laced her fingers through mine and tugged at my arm, leading me into the house.

The house was very minimalistic. She had only the most necessary pieces of furniture scattered around the house in an artistic way. Everything she did was like that. Spontaneous and erratic. The opposite of what Grace was.

That was why I liked her. Because she didn’t remind me of Grace at all.

Alice was divorced. Her husband had left her with the house and half of the furniture. He’d gotten the condo in Miami, apparently. She was an artist, using all her time to paint paintings I didn’t understand. They weren’t pictures of anything, rather a lot of arbitrary shapes in colors that didn’t match.

It was abstract art, Alice had said. I hadn’t really listened to what that entailed.

“What have you been up to since we last saw each other?” she asked. “It feels like it’s been forever.”

“Oh, not too much. A lot of work, as usual, and I’ve been helping my sister out. The end of the month is always harder work for her.”

Alice nodded. I’d shared bits and pieces of my life with her. She offered me some tea and I accepted. I didn’t like tea but her scrutinizing attention on me made me nervous. If I said yes to her hospitality, it kept her busy.

“What’s bothering you?” she suddenly asked. She put tea leaves into a strainer and put it in the tea pot.

“Nothing’s bothering me,” I said, looking up at her.

She shook her head. “I haven’t known you for very long, but I know when something’s getting to you. You’re distant. It’s like you haven’t really arrived.”

I sighed. I’d hoped it wasn’t that obvious.

“A friend of mine ended up in the hospital a couple of days ago,” I said. Better tell some of the truth than lie completely.

“What happened?” Alice asked. She paused with two cups in her hand, looking at me.

“Car accident. She’s okay though. It was more of a scare than anything, really.”

Liar, I told myself. Not a friend. Not just a scare. So much more.

“I’m sorry to hear that,” Alice said. “You’ve never spoken of any of your friends.”

I nodded. I hadn’t mentioned much of my life to her. Outside the ranch and Grace I didn’t really have one.

Alice made to pick up the tray with the tea cups and the teapot, but I stepped closer. I knew she wanted me to offer. She was all about etiquette and manners and stepping up to the definition of a gentleman. I wasn’t sure why she was trying it on me. I was a cowboy. Being a gentleman wasn’t exactly in the job description. For us it was all about hard work. Honor, valor, all that.

At least, that was how it used to be back in the day. I liked to think that it was still like that somewhere. That’s why I loved being a cowboy so much.

“Let me,” I said and she smiled like she didn’t think I was going to ask. I picked up the tray and fought the urge to make a snide remark. I was in a bad mood and it wouldn’t be fair to take it out on Alice.

She hadn’t done anything wrong. It was just who she was.

I followed her to the formal sitting room and put the tray down on the coffee table. Alice kicked off her shoes and folded her feet underneath her on the armchair. She was like a porcelain doll, with perfect skin and bright eyes and a graceful manner that looked like it came straight from a movie.

Why, then, couldn’t I just forget about Grace and move on?

Chapter 9 - Grace

I knew what kind of house Elijah lived in. Mansion was more the word. It was huge, with rolling gardens, green velvety grass and a pool that was inviting all year round.

I’d been in the house a couple of times, but only as a guest. Never as someone who lived there. Not that I could remember, anyway. And that was what bothered me. Six months wasn’t a long time. Not compared to the rest of my life, everything that I’d learned and experienced. Six months was nothing compared to that.

And somehow by losing the last six months, it felt like I’d lost a lifetime. There was so much that felt different. So much that I just couldn’t remember, and every now and then there were lulls in the conversation where I knew that I should have been able to fill it up with information. With memories. With what the last six months had held.

And I just didn’t know.

I’d insisted on the spare bedroom. Elijah had taken me through to the master bedroom. All my clothes were in the closet. My makeup was in the bathroom. My robe was behind the door. And I felt like a stranger.

“I don’t understand,” Elijah said, standing in the doorway of the guest bedroom. I’d just woken up and I was struggling to just come to terms with the fact that in three nights I’d been in three different places. “Even if you don’t remember us being together, surely it’s not so strange to be with me now? You’ve been here so many times.”

And he was right. I had been here so many times. Elijah and I had spent hours in his bed. I’d used that robe behind the door to sneak down to the kitchen in the middle of the night, after a wild night with him. Why did I feel like this? Why didn’t I want to be around him now when I’ve always been around him, even during the times that I could remember?

But I just couldn’t do it.

“I just need time, Elijah,” I said.

“That’s another thing. Since when do you call me by my name? We’ve used pet names for each other from the start. What’s changed?”

I closed my eyes and counted to three. I had a throbbing ache between my temples, and I felt like stuffing my head into the pillows and screaming. I’d removed the bandage the night before. There was a terrible bump on my head. But I was tired of it. It irritated my skin.

“Sweetheart?” he asked, and I realized I hadn’t answered him for a lot longer than three counts. I opened my eyes and looked at him. I saw him the way I’d seen him the first time. His hair was a white blond, cut in a brush cut that looked very militaristic. I knew that his clients revered him, if not feared him, because of how hard and to the point he could be. The scar on his left cheek didn’t make things any easier, and the way he leaned against the door, his arms crossed over his chest, I could understand why.

But they didn’t know him the way I knew him. He was charming in his own way, and whatever he lacked in etiquette, he made up for with the best that money could buy. And I still couldn’t do it. I couldn’t go up to him and kiss him the way I wanted to. I couldn’t be in the same bed with him, no matter how many times I’d done it before.

And I had no idea why.

“It’s me,” I finally said.

“What?”

I hadn’t spoken for a while. “You asked me what’s changed. The answer is me. I’ve changed. I don’t know what’s going on, but I just feel like I don’t belong here. Like I’m in the wrong place, with the wrong people.”

His face hardened. The concern in his eyes drained away until they were cold and empty.

“And who are the right people?” he asked and his voice matched his eyes.

My first answer was Justin. But I didn’t say that. I may have had a bump on my head and no idea who I was anymore, which sounded more melodramatic than anything else considering, but I still knew that if I said that to him now, if I told him that he wasn’t the right guy, it would hurt him.

And no matter how much I didn’t want to be with him, I didn’t want to hurt him. Deep down inside of me there was something that still loved him, the way that I’d fallen in love with him the first few months that I’d worked in Fort Atkinson.

The problem was that I loved Justin the same. Apparently I’d chosen before. I didn’t know how I could choose now.

***

My job at Magna Solutions was nothing like what I used to do in the city. I’d travelled a lot as a lawyer, represented a lot of companies. And I never worked this closely with an owner at any point in time. Elijah was a hard businessman. He made cutthroat decisions all the time and his employees knew not to question him. I’d learned that as well.

We were in the boardroom before a meeting, and I was going over the last of the notes.

“They’ll be here any moment,” Elijah said, looking at his wristwatch. “You just work your magic and we’ll have this deal sealed in under half an hour.”

“Elijah, I’ve been looking over these figures and what it will mean for Magna Solutions in the long run. I’m still not sure these are the best terms,” I said, glancing at my papers. I’d been mulling it all over in my mind for the past week and I was nervous. Nervous for Magna Solutions, nervous for my job.

He looked up at me, and his eyes weren’t friendly.

“Miss Davis,” he said, and I shivered. Since our interlude in the coffee shop, he’d called me Grace. “I don’t need to remind you that this is one of the biggest deals so far.”

“I know, that’s why I’m nervous about it. I mean, if it works it will be great. But if it doesn’t?”

“Don’t question my judgment. I didn’t hire you to tell me what to do, I hired you to tell me the best way to do it.”

I swallowed, glanced down at my papers again. I’d heard him use that tone with some of the other employees but he hadn’t spoken to me like that before.

The door open and three men in business suits walked in. When I looked at Elijah again he had a warm smile on his face and he walked up to them with outstretched hands before he offered his hands to each of them. The transformation was complete and shocking. I did as I was asked. When it came down to signing the papers, Elijah glared at me like I was going to sabotage it all.

And when they left, he turned to me again. Usually after a success like this he offered to take me out. This was where our relationship had been growing into something more than just a business relationship. This was where I’d gotten to know him, gotten to like him.

“Make sure that the documents are ready for the Bennett meeting on Friday,” he said to me, and walked out of the office. Nothing else. I was left alone in the boardroom.