The Last Girl (21 page)

I feel
Hayden’s hands move on my waist as I continue to grind my hips against his, becoming more comfortable with the movement. I wrap my arms around his neck behind me and pull him closer.

“You’re good at this,” he says
into my neck, sending tingles down my back.

“Yeah, right,” I laugh.

“I’m serious,” he says as his eyes lock onto my lips. “You’re so hot.”

And then
Hayden leans forward and next thing I know, we are making out while grinding. We are doing the exact same thing I was just calling other people gross for minutes earlier. It was a very hard thing to do, having to turn my neck in a strange way in order to meet his lips. After a minute of kissing, I finally thought “Screw this” and turned my body around so I could face him. I wrap my arms around his neck and I feel his hands on my back drop a little low, but honestly I don’t mind. After a while, I am so engulfed in heat, inside and out, that I have to push away from Hayden to catch my breath.

“I need a drink,” I shout over the music.

He nods, “Me too.”

I take his hand and we navigate through the people and into the kitchen.
Hayden gets a soda for me out of the fridge. “That’s the last one.”

“Here, let’s share it,” I say, popping it open.

He shakes his head, “No, it’s fine babe. You have it. I’m sure there’s more in the garage or somewhere. I’ll go find one, stay here.” He kisses me on the cheek before disappearing in the crowd again.

I chug the soda in one minute and toss it in the closest trash can
. I look around and notice a couple making out next to me. I try not to judge them but I can’t help myself. God, I’m such a hypocrite. The girl has light brown hair and is sitting on the counter with a guy who has jet black hair standing between her legs. It wasn’t until she pulled away that I noticed it was Courtney. And it wasn’t until he made eye contact with me that I noticed it was Zac. You’ve got to be shitting me.

“I’m going to go to the bathroom real quick,” Courtney shouts at him as she hops off the counter.

I wait until she is out of ear shot to talk to him, “I know what you are trying to do, Zac.”

He looks at me innocently, “What is that?”

“I get it. I told you to date the entire cheer squad, well message received I get it. Stop playing with them!”

“Why do you think everything is about you?” he asks, stepping closer.

“Okay, let’s pretend for a second that you’re not trying to make me jealous by making out with every cheerleader in the school. Why would you be doing this then?”

“
So does that mean it’s working?” he asks, taking another step forward. “You’re jealous.”

I shake my head, “You’re unbelievable.”

“But I got your attention, didn’t I?” he says darkly.

I continue to stare.

He dips his head, “Goodnight, Jenna.” My eyes follow him as he makes his way to the front door, turning to look at me one last time before he leaves.

Courtney runs back into the kitchen and looks around confused. “Where did
Zac go?”

“He’s waiting for you at the car,” I lie.

“Okay, thanks!” she yells happily.

I just hope she gets there in time before he leaves.

I make my way through the crowd to find Hayden. Obviously he needs help finding a soda. I make my way through the house, pretty much going wherever the crowd takes me and wind up back in the dance room. I look among the people, hoping to see his familiar face. Finally I see his damp curls bouncing up and down to the music. And the next thing my eyes land on is Victoria standing right in front of him as she grinds into him. Hayden’s hand runs up her thigh and I feel tears spring into my eyes. That can’t be Hayden. Hayden wouldn’t be dancing with her. But there was no mistaking those curls. It was Hayden. And he was grinding with Victoria. I want to run away. I want to get the hell out of there, but I feel as if I am glued to the floor. I can’t do anything but stand there and watch. I watch as he moves his hands up and down her hips. It isn’t until she glances in my direction and smiles smugly at me that I do finally run.

I run out the door and search for
Zac’s motorcycle, but it is nowhere to be seen.

I am not going to start crying. Not here.

I quickly pull out my phone and call the first person I see in my recent calls list.

“Hello?”
Luke’s raspy voice asks.

“
Luke? Were you asleep?” my voice cracks as I ask this question.

“No, no,” he lies. “What’s up?”

I feel the tears start to fall. “Can you come and get me?”

“Jenna, please tell me what he did,” Luke asks for the millionth time in the car.

“
Luke, please. I can’t.”

“Jenna, if he did something to you I swear I will kick his ass.”

“There’s no need, Luke. Please just stop asking about it.”

He can hear the pain in my voice, and I think that’s what shuts him up.

Finally, we pull up in front of my house and I quickly get out. “Thank you so much for the ride, Luke.” It was hard to be appreciative under these circumstances but I try my best. “I will talk to you tomorrow.”

I slam the door and nearly sprint into my house. I throw my stuff down on the stairs and run into my parents’ room. I can’t go in my bed; I know it still smells like him. I collapse on the bed
that is ten times more comfortable than mine and weep into the red satin comforter. Minutes later there is a pounding on the door. I ignore it. There is another pound, one that doesn’t stop and I am so irritated that I finally get up.

“Coming!” I yell, voice cracking again.

I walk down the stairs like a corpse and slowly open the door.

“Hey, babe,”
Hayden says, pushing past me and into the living room. Just by hearing him say those two words and I already knew he was drunk.

“Please tell me you didn’t drive here.”

“Got a ride home with some others. They weren’t drinking, don’t worry. Why did you leave the party without me?” he asks quickly.

I don’t answer as his wandering eyes land on my face.

“Have you been crying?” He takes a step forward. I take one back. “What’s wrong? Why were you crying?”

I roll my eyes, “I don’t know. Maybe it had something to do with my
boyfriend grinding with his ex.”

He looks surprised but his face soon become relaxed again as he laughs, “Oh that? That
meant nothing, we were just dancing.”

“It meant something to me,
Hayden.”

“Jenna, you can’t be serious.”

“I’m dead serious. I saw the way you were touching her. That’s not something you do with a frie-”

“Shh
. . .” He interrupts me, putting a finger to my lips. I try to pull away as he pulls me towards him. Our lips touch and I push against his chest, but soon enough I find myself melting into him. Every fiber of my body was telling me to kick him out, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t move, nor did I want to. I wanted to stay like that forever. But all too soon, Hayden broke me out of my trance by grabbing the end of my tank-top and attempting to pull it over my head.

“
Hayden, stop.”

“Come on, Jenna,” he slurs. “You owe me.”

“I . . . What?”

“You owe me. Remember
I told you had to make it up to me when you didn’t want to hang out after school earlier this week. This is how you can repay me.”

“
Hayden, that means I have to give you a foot message or a back rub. That doesn’t mean I have to sleep with you.”

“Jenna, you’re over-reacting. It’s not that big of a deal,” he says calmly as he leans forward to kiss me again.

I feel my insides explode.

“Get out.”

Hayden’s eyes shoot open, “W-what?”

“Get out of my house,” I say opening up the front door.

“Are you joking?” he asks looking scared.

“I’m serious. Get out of my house and don’t come back. I don’t ever want to talk to you again.”

“Jenna, I was kidding…”

“
Sure you were, and it was hilarious, Hayden. Now leave.”

I shove him out the door and quickly
shut and lock it behind him with a loud
slam
and
click
.

Before I even
can comprehend what’s happening, I find myself a messy heap in my parents’ bedroom in between their red satin sheets.

Chapter 31: Trying to Sleep

Bang

“Jenna!” I hear a muffled deep voice call. “Jenna, open the door!”

I involuntarily groan. My head pounds, and the banging on the wooden front door doesn’t make it any better. I squint as my eyes adjust to the light seeping in from the cracks of the blinds I had closed earlier this morning when the brightness had become too intense for me to ignore. I sit up in the bed slowly, rubbing my temple along the way.

“Jenna!” More pounding
on the wooden door.

“Coming!” I call, voice cracking in the middle of the word.

I get up slowly and look down at my jeans and tank top that I hadn’t changed out of from last night. On my way to the door, I stop to look at my face in the mirror. It is horrifying. Mascara and eyeliner is clumped in the corners of my eyes and there are black streaks running down my cheeks. My eyes are pink and puffy and my hair was tangled and ratted. I sigh and slip a hair tie off my wrist and pull my hair into a ponytail. It will have to do for now. As for my face, all I can do is just wipe the messy makeup off with my hands.

Another pound.

“I’m coming!” I yell, with more force this time, my voice warming up after not being used while I was sleeping. I glance at the clock on the wall in the living room as I make my way through the room; 2:30 pm. Wow.

I take a gulp of air right before opening the door, already knowing the face I would see on the other side.

“Jenna,” Hayden smiles a smile that quickly fades as he takes in my appearance. “Are you okay?”

“Just peachy,” I respond sarcastically.

“Can we talk?” he asks as he reaches out to grab my hand.

I quickly use that hand to fix my hair, clearly avoiding his touch.

“Talk,” I say coldly.

“What happened last night-”

“Is never going to happen again.”

“Exactly. I’m sorry. I was a drunken idiot and I promise I won’t do it again.”

“No, Hayden,” I shake my head, “I mean it’s never going to happen again because I’m breaking up with you.”

I see a muscle under his eye twitch. “What?”

“I can’t do this anymore. You’re bad for me.”

“I’m bad for you,” he says
, as if his brain was still processing the words.

“Yes.”

There is a long pause, and all I can do is stare over Hayden’s shoulder at my neighbor’s tree and listen to the sound of his slow breathing.

“So, that’s it then? I mess up once and now you’re never going to talk to me again?”

“It’s not just what happened last night, Hayden. It’s what happened last weekend and my Bio test-”

“You’re blaming me,” he interrupts, “for your failing
your Bio test?”

“No, it’s just,” I pause to think of what I am trying to say. “It’s just we aren’t good together,
Hayden. You want someone that you can go out and party with every weekend. That’s not me. That’s someone you need.”

“Is that it? So this is going to be the last conversation we ever have? We avoid each other at school and sit different places at lunch?”

“We can still be friends.”

“Oh, so this is one of those things. The cliché
‘let’s still be friends.’ That’s great.”

“I don’t see why we can’t be civil about this. You have nothing to be mad at me for,
Hayden. And I chose to forgive you. Now, we move on,” I say looking at his feet.

He slowly lifts my chin up with his index and middle fingers. “What if I don’t want to move on?”

My eyes lock onto his and I realize that this may be the last time I ever get close enough to get lost in his green eyes. His beautiful green eyes that shine whenever his dimples are showing. And I have the urge to kiss him. It would be so easy for me to just lean in, grab the back of his neck, and kiss him. But I don’t. A little voice in the back of my head stops me. I have to end this now.

“You just have to,
Hayden. Maybe in a couple of years we can try again. But, right now, we just aren’t meant to be.”

“I can’t wait a few years,” he says, his voice so low it is almost inaudible.

I shrug. “Then don’t.”

I take a few steps back into my house and feel the cool metal door handle against my palm. “Goodbye,
Hayden.”

Click.

I hear the
Marimba
ringtone play loudly in my ear. I had fallen back asleep. I peel my face off my mom’s currently soggy pillow and reach zombie-like for the phone next to me.

“Hello?”

“Were you asleep?” I hear Luke’s happy voice ask. “God, Jenna, it is 3:30.”

“I’m just really tired,” I say and a sniffle comes out afterwards.

“Is something wrong?” he asks. I can hear the concern in his voice.

“No, I’m okay.”

“Okay…” Luke responds not convinced. “Are we still going laser tagging?”

“Shit,
Luke, I’m sorry. I just really don’t feel up to it, right now.”

“Wow, bailing on me a second time. This stings, Jenna.”

I laugh but it comes out sounding kind of empty. “I’m sorry, next weekend?”

“Are you sure you’
re alright? When are you going to tell me what happened at that party last night?”

“
Luke, I promise, I’m fine.”

“Whatever you say, Jenna.”

“I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

Before I can say goodbye I hear the line go dead. Well, that’s cool,
Luke, thanks.

I collapse back onto the tear soaked pillow and fall back into dreamland where the world is a much happier place.

Bang

Is everyone banging on my front door today? I just want to sleep!

Bang

“Hang on!”

I walk down the stairs, not even bothering to look in a mirror and open the door.

“Luke?”

He pushes right past me and into my living room. “You have a ni-ice house,”
he says, splitting the word ‘nice’ into two syllables. “What do your parents do?”

“The
y’re lawyers,” I mumble.

“Where are they?”

“On a business trip.”

“Perfect. You can tell me what happened with
Hayden last night.” He starts to walk up the stairs.

“
Luke, I told you I’m fine.”

He stops walking and turns to face me at the bottom landing. “Jenna, you look like shit.”

“Um, thanks?”

“People generally don’t look like shit on purpose. Clearly something happened, and you are going to tell me.” He turns back around and continues to walk up the stairs, making an immediate right into my parents’ room. I just follow, his words bouncing off the walls in my head.

“I’m guessing this is where you have been hiding out all day,” he says, referring to the messy sheets. His eyes land on the pillow. “That’s a lot of tears for nothing to have happened.” He sits on the end of the bed waiting for me to start talking.

“How did you even know where I lived?” I ask folding my arms in the doorway.

“Jessica told me.”

“Well that’s great. My best friend gives out my address to random people.”

“I’m not random. I’m Luke Parker,” he states plainly and pats the spot next to him on the bed.

My arms drop to my sides and I sit. “
Luke, it’s late and you should probably go home. And I should go to sleep.”

“You’ve been sleeping all day!” he laughs. “And it’s only 3:45.”

“But didn’t you call me at 3:30?”

He nods.

“Wasn’t that like, 5 hours ago?”

“No, it was 15 minutes ago. That’s what you get for sleeping all day, lazy.”

“I’m not lazy, I’m just upset.”

“So something did happen.”

I sigh, “At the party last night, I saw Hayden grinding with his ex-girlfriend. Really intensely, too. That’s when I called you. And then after you dropped me off at home, Hayden stopped by really drunk and asked me why I left early. And then he told me I was overreacting about the grinding thing and then he tried to…” I stopped myself, feeling the tears spring to my eyes. I can’t tell Luke that Hayden tried to get me to have sex with him. I look up at him and I know that I don’t have to tell him. He knew what was coming next in my story.

My tears started to fall more furiously now and I feel
Luke’s arm wrap around my back. I drop my head onto his shoulder and continue to cry.

“Jenna, he doesn’t deserve you,”
Luke whispers.

“Oh, please,” I scoff.

“I mean it. He’s an idiot who doesn’t think before he acts. You’re too good for him.”

I feel myself smile, “Thanks,
Luke.”

It is quiet for a few more moments as more tears escape my eyes.

“Want me to beat him up?”

I laugh and lift my head off his shoulder, “No, there’s no need for that.” I wipe my cheeks and my eyes land on
Luke’s tear stained shirt. “Oh, God, I’m sorry.”

He looks down at it and laughs, “It’s alright.” He reaches behind his back and all of a sudden he has a movie in his hands. “Let’s watch Monster’s Inc.”

I laugh, “Where did you get that from?”

“My butt.”

“Wait,” I stop, “Literally?”

It’s his turn to laugh now, “No, idiot. I just tucked it into the back of my pants.” He gets off the bed and walks up to the
42 inch plasma TV and starts to turn on everything.

“You just like making yourself at home, don’t you?”

He nods, “Now shut up and get comfortable.”

“Jenna,” Luke whispers.

My eyes shoot open and the first thing I see is a black TV screen. I lift my head off of
Luke’s shoulder to see him smiling.

“You really were tired. You fell asleep during the first 30 minutes.”

I giggle, “I told you I was!”

“Well,”
Luke says hopping off the bed, “I’m gonna get going.”

“Oh,” I say, sort of sad that he was leaving.

“You’re okay being here by yourself, right?”

“Yeah, don’t worry about it.”

I follow him down the stairs and he stops in front of the door. “Everything will be okay, Jenna. I know it sucks now but soon enough, you will realize that what I told you is true. You deserve someone better.”

I smile, “Thanks,
Luke. For everything.” I wrap my arms around his neck and hug him. “What are you doing tomorrow?” I ask, pulling away.

“Going to school,” he responds as he opens the door.

“I meant after school smarty.”

“Uh, why?”

“So we can hangout. Or maybe you can help me study Biology or something.”

“I can’t.”

I feel my heart skip a beat, “Why?”
“Because,” he pauses. “Because I have to do something.”

“Do what?” I know I am prying but he is being vague and it is bugging me.

“I have to, uh, go see someone.”

I don’t mean to say it but it just sort of shoots out of me. “You’re going to go see your secret girlfriend?”

He looks at me weirdly, “My what?”

I mentally kick myself, “Never mind.”

“You think I have a secret girlfriend?”

“Well, yeah.”

“Why?”

I shrug, “When we went to McDonald’s that one night with
Lance and Jessica, Jessica and I overheard you and Lance talking about you going to see someone and it just kind of sounded like you were talking about a girl.”

And then,
Luke does something I don’t expect him to do. He starts to laugh.

I just look at him, “Why are you laughing?”

It takes him a few seconds to catch his breath before he walks out the door. “Come on,” he says, expecting me to follow.

“Why?”

“I have to show you something. And, you’ve been crying all day over a guy you only dated for less than 2 weeks- it’s getting a little ridiculous. I was nice at first, but now it’s time to get over it.”

I nod slowly, “I guess I get too attached to people… Plus, he was really hot.”