The Last Changeling (13 page)

Lora brushed my arm with her fingertips. I couldn't believe she would still touch me after what I'd said. But it gave me courage, in the midst of feeling utterly disgusted with myself.

“I got obsessed with it. I'd stare at something for hours and then try to draw it from memory, but it never worked. Then my dad started in on me about it. He loves giving me shit.”

“Why?”

He hates me.

“I don't know.” I shrugged. “Maybe he thinks it'll make me try harder. But it just made me think I wasn't good enough.”

More like useless
.

“Aaron was so good about the whole thing. Most kids would've been jealous, but he wanted to help me. He got it into his head that we just had to create the right image, something exciting enough for my mind to remember.” I laughed, closing my eyes. “He'd tear the kitchen apart, using ketchup and oatmeal to make himself look like a monster. He'd burrow into the flowerbeds. One time he got caught in the attic crawl space, even though I told him I wouldn't be able to see up there. But there was one place I wouldn't let him go.”

I waited, in case she wanted to stop me. Go back in time. Forget.

But she didn't.

“You know that pine tree in our yard?” I said. “In the winter, when everything else is bare, that tree stays perfectly green. Aaron used to say if he could just get to the top, right after it snowed, he'd be able to create the perfect image. But—”

“You wouldn't let him?”

“It was too dangerous. Then, there was this day.” I covered my face with my arm. “This awful, stupid day two years ago, when this
asshole
at school snuck that stuff into my food, you know, that shit that makes you throw up? Just to mess with me.”

“Brad?”

“Actually his older brother, Buddy. I basically puked all over my clothes and completely freaked out. Our washing machine had been broken all week, and Mom was afraid to call someone to fix it because Dad was always stressed about money. I came home from school and I was so pissed. The first thing I heard was Aaron crying, which meant Mom had been crying. Which meant Dad had threatened to leave again. And I just … I messed up.”

“You let Aaron climb the tree?”

“I thought it would make him happy. But the second he ran out of the house, I went after him, yelling that I was kidding.” I dropped my head into my hands. “It wasn't enough.”

“He made it to the top before you reached him?”

“No.” Part of me wished he had. Part of me wished I hadn't seen the whole thing. “He'd made it halfway up when I came out the front door. He actually turned and smiled at me; he was so happy. And I was screaming like a crazy person, demanding he come down.”

“But he didn't?”

“No.”

“And he fell?”

I waited a beat before answering. “He was almost to the top when the branch snapped. He fell to the ground like a rock. It happened so fast, there was no way I could've caught him.” I blinked, horrified at the thought of crying in front of Lora. “I just stood there, staring at him. He looked
like he was sleeping. I kept telling myself, maybe he is
sleeping.”

Tears spilled over, pain stinging me in my deepest places. I felt like I'd been split open, my insides pouring out onto the ground. Now she could see me. Now she knew. Now she could hurt me, break me, hate me. Now I needed her even mo
re.

“I still visit him every Sunday,” I said, curling in on myself. “I've gone early, while you're sleeping. And every time, it reminds me I shouldn't be staying with them.”

“Why?”

“Seeing me just reminds them of what happened. It's the reason I moved into the garage, you know? To give them a break. But it wasn't enough.”

“Taylor.”

“If I'd left, maybe they could've moved on. They wouldn't have stayed in a house they didn't need. They wouldn't be in deb
t.”

“
Taylor
.”

“He's right to blame me. He knew how much it would cost to have kids. It's why he never wanted us in the first place.”

“Taylor, you're seventeen years old!”

“So?”

“So, they are the adults. They are the ones who made those decisions.”

“It's not like that in my family. They need me—”

“They need you to be a teenager. They need you to have a childhood. It is their job to take care of you, like it was their job to take care of him.”

“It doesn't work like that.”

“It should. It can. They were supposed to take care of you,” she said again, and it felt wonderful, just the idea of it. But it hurt, too, because they hadn't taken care of me. Not in the way I'd needed.

“They don't want to,” I said.

“Then let me. It's not your job to take care of the house, Taylor. It was not your job to raise Aaron.”

“But—”

“I'm not saying it was their fault, what happened. But I am saying it wasn't yours. Taylor, look at me.”

I turned to face her, though it scared me. The look she gave me was not pity. Somewhere in there, she recognized my pain as if she'd experienced it herself. Maybe our shared pain could bond us. I had a vision, strange and startling, of the two of us wrapped together in seaweed. But as I moved toward her, aching to be that close, to let her sew up the parts of me that I'd opened for her, she slipped from my grasp like a mermaid.

“Trust that I will be whatever it is you need of me,” she said, “so long as it doesn't compromise my being. But I cannot deny the feeling that what you need now is a friend.”

“I have friends,” I said, trying to turn again.

She took my hands in hers, holding them against her heart. “Not like this.”

–––––

That night the story was my obsession. I needed Lora to confide in me the way I'd confided in her. If I could just learn a little more about the place she'd left behind, I might find a way to change her mind about leaving me. Or maybe I could change her mind about going back alone.

She was sitting on the bed, her back against the wall, and my head was in her lap. She hadn't even asked me to join her. I'd just crawled there, unashamed. Something had shifted between us, but I wasn't ready to put it into words. I didn't want to scare it away.

“The princess followed in her mother's footsteps,” she murmured, stroking my hair, “gathering the desperate creatures of Faerie like cracked and broken shells. The symmetry of their rebellions was not lost on her, and she wondered if, in the beginning, Virayla had believed her efforts to be just as noble. Would the princess someday look back at the movement she'd inspired and feel horrified at the monstrosity it had become? Was there a way to avoid corruption, or was every noble revolution destined to mutate into bloody, senseless warfare? Doubts plagued her mind but she plodded on, pushing them aside as she searched for allies.”

As Lora spoke, she casually lifted my hand to her stomach. I slid my fingers under her shirt, over her navel. It was the first time I'd touched any part of her that was hidden by clothing. She didn't stop me, but she didn't encourage me to go further, either. There was a part of me that felt she couldn't, even if she wanted to. There was a genuine barrier between us, something I didn't quite understand. Had her family taught her to fear anyone outside their cult? Had they taught her to fear being touched?

I held my hand still for a minute, resting it on her stomach. Her skin was so soft, it killed me not to be constantly feeling it. But I was closer than I'd ever been, and I wasn't going to fuck it up if I could help it. I needed her too badly.

“At first the oppressed servants of the Unseelie Court looked on her with suspicion and scorn. She was the daughter of the Queen. Surely her words were being twisted to fool them. But as time went by, tensions ever escalating between the courts, they began to listen. It had been so long since they'd allowed a glimmer of hope to enter their hearts, so long since they'd even had the luxury to dream, that the moment hope returned, they could not ignore it. It consumed them.”

She drew in a shaky breath as I slid my hand up, taking her shirt with it. “So it began, quiet and slithering like a snake beneath a stone. All that could be heard of their plans was the pitter-pattering of feet across the leaf-strewn forest, or the whispering of muted voices in hollows and caves. They met in places the nobles refused to go: murky marshes, dank tunnels beneath the earth, and patches of land surrounded by the sea, casting intricate spells to tie the tongues of those who might betray their secrets.”

Tongues
. The word hovered in my brain. Quickly, as smooth as I could possibly be, I brushed my lips across her stomach, tasting the tiniest bit.

She let out a sigh that was pure deliciousness. Her hands went into my hair, either to bring me closer or hold me back. Again, I waited for a signal.

“What happens next?” I asked. We both knew I wasn't talking about the story.

But she ignored the hint. “Their first task was to relearn each others' cultures. Each group took their turn telling stories of their rites and rituals, and how their lives had been cruelly altered by the Court. In this way, they learned to appreciate their differences, and to acknowledge their common hardships. And they celebrated, as more and more of them came together and danced in the way that only immortals in physical bodies can. Centaurs stepped from the depth of the forest to dance beside nymphs in the light of the moon. Elves carried gnomes and dwarves to the highest branches, while sprites danced with pixies in the glowing sapphire sky.

“Then, without prompting, these servants realized what the princess had suspected for some time: the Unseelie Court was an abomination to the natural world, and to freedom, and to life. It had to be disbanded, so that all could learn to live together in harmony. The nobles had to be removed from power.”

Hmmm. Removed
.

I wondered if I could turn that into a sign. I imagined I could, but probably not one that Lora was trying to send. My fingers grazed the bottom of her bra. She exhaled again and said “Mmm,” in this way that made me want to rip off her clothes. And mine. But with this intense desire came frustration. Would it always be this way? Would I always be forced to push at her limits, never knowing if she wanted the things I wanted? Was she really not interested, or did she think it was wrong to be with me?

I wanted her so badly my entire body was buzzing.

Just then, she said, “These possibilities buzzed within each of them, drifting through the land until even the most desolate found hope.”

I slid my arm under her and pulled her closer. She
didn't pull away, just continued her story, dipping her head down to speak in my ear. “There were thousands upon thousands of them, meeting in different places so as never to be caught. As they stared across the crowds, they real
ized they could win this battle based on numbers alone.”

I closed my eyes, listening. Touching. My fingers slid down.

“This is the trick to revolution,” she said, and her breathing quickened. For a second, I thought she nipped at my ear. But it happened so fast, I could've imagined it. “Yes, leaders play their
parts, as do meetings and strategies. But the truth of it is, the corrupt and the truly evil will always be smaller in number. They will use cleverness to tame and lies to separate, but once people realize their commonality, their shared pain and their shared desires, they are, quite literally, unstoppable.”

Unstoppable
, I thought, sliding my hand beneath the hem of her jeans.

That's when she stopped me.

17

E
l
o
r
A

Night cast her cloak over the land, but there were those who refused to sleep. We gathered in secret beneath the waning moon. Clad in the purest black, we attempted to creep across the grass toward the school. Unfortunately, Unity had experienced three unexpected days of showers, and the field was a muddy mess.

Terrible inconvenience for the soccer team
, I thought with a smile.

It had been nearly impossible for them to practice in all that water. They'd slipped and fallen, muddying themselves like hogs, and thus had been utterly unprepared for a very important game. The field would dry, the grass would emerge once more, but the team had lost their chance to go to State.

Pity
.

It was nice to know I could manipulate the elements in the human world as easily as in Faerie.

My foot made a sucking sound as I pulled it from a carnivorous puddle. Kylie hurried along beside me, following the cement path. Taylor and Keegan were farther off, darting from tree to tree. The rest of the students wouldn't be arriving for an hour.

I could hardly wait.

Kylie's voice broke into my thoughts. “I can't believe you got the keys to the school.”

“I pretty mu
ch have a standing appointment on Fridays with Principal Jade. Yesterday, she went to get us some coffee, and … ” I let Kylie figure out the rest. It wasn't as if I could tell her the truth.

Who needs keys when you can o
pen doors with magic?

Kylie stopped by the ramp at the back of the school, waiting for the boys to tire of their game. “I'm just glad I didn't have to ask Alexia to steal the keys from Janky Jim.”

I sat down on the stairs. “Would that have been a problem?”

“Not really. She owes me a favor, but I want to save it for something good.”

“Why does she owe you a favor?”

Kylie looked up at the sky. “I don't hold it against her that she keeps us a secret. I don't. But she acts like prom only matters to her.” Purple clouds drifted in front of the moon. The reprieve from light seemed to lend her courage. “It's my prom too. I know it's meaningless, but … ”

“There's nothing wrong with caring about something, regardless of what it means to other people.”

Kylie nodded, momentarily distracted by the movement out on the field. Keegan had darted across the grass and was hiding behind the tree nearest to the school. Taylor was nowhere to be seen. But I could feel him watching; his eyes burned into me.

“I don't want to care,” Kylie said. “But I do. I mean, I want to show up in this killer outfit and dance, and complain about how crappy it is even though I'm having a good time. So much has happened this year … ” She paused, staring off into the trees. “I just wish she'd support me. Support us, you know? None of those other people matter.”

“Would you feel better if she weren't crowned queen? I bet we could entice the crowd to vote differently.”

At the very least, I could alter the results with glamour.

“No.” Kylie shook her head. “I don't want to hurt her. I
want
her to win. Maybe that's sick, but it's really important to her. She needs to be loved. Her parents ignore her, you know?” She pulled a small gold object from her pocket. “She started smoking just to see if anyone would care.” Kylie flicked her thumb and a flame jumped forth.

I took the lighter for a moment. “Did anyone care?” I asked, enthralled by humanity's ability to harness the power of fire.

“Just me. I keep stealing these from her, but it doesn't matter. She's addicted now.” Kylie looked up, making sure Keegan was a good distance away before continuing. “One time she accidentally took too many sleeping pills and her mom didn't even notice. The
maid
found her in her room.”

I wasn't given the chance to respond. As if sensing the secrecy of the conversation, Keegan appeared before us. He bowed low, tipping an imaginary hat. “Perimeter is secure, ma'am.”

“Very good.” I nodded respectfully as Taylor arrived on the steps. “Everybody ready?”

“As ready as I will be,” Keegan said. “Are you sure this is the best place to have this meeting? We spend too much time here as it is.”

“It's the perfect place.” I stepped in front of the double doors so they couldn't see what I was doing. Holding my left hand over the door, I unlocked it with the slightest bit of magic, while making a twisting movement with my right. Even with real magic, it often came down to sleight of hand. “We're trying to convince them they can take back the school. What better way to boost their confidence than to literally take over the school in a way that none of their social betters have been able to do?”

“Fair enough,” Keegan agreed. “One more question.”

“Yes?”

“Why are you doing this?”

Because I'm trying to smoke out a tyrant,
I thought, but that wasn't really true anymore. Ever since my first day at Unity, I'd had a sneaking suspicion of who the school's biggest tyrant was. And by prom night, I'd have proof. So why
was
I still doing this?

“Because it's the right thing to do,” I said, and felt a little thrill at the fact that I
could
say it.

“Be serious,” Keegan said.

“I am serious. Equality doesn't work if it's only for some people.”

“I'm going to make a bumper sticker out of that.”

“If one group of people isn't free, none of us are.” I opened the door for my companions. “It took me too long to see that. Come on.”

Together we lifted the hoods of our sweatshirts and slipped inside the building, keeping to the left side of the wall. We had just slunk past the glass trophy cases, and were making our way across the hall when a sharp beeping sounded at our backs.

I spun around. “What was that?”

“Oh, God,” Kylie said. She followed the sound to a little white rectangle tucked away in a corner, between the left-hand door and the trophy case. Hidden.

“What is that?” I asked.

“Oh, God.”

“Kylie?”

“It's a security system. An
alarm.
Oh, crap.”

“What's a security system?” The wall beeped again, twice this time.

“A security system requires a security code that you have to type in or it goes off.” Taylor's voice was pinched.

“But we're the only ones who will hear it.”

Three pairs of eyes landed on me. It was clear that this time my lack of technological knowledge would not be deemed “cute.”

“It sends a signal to the cops,” Taylor explained. “I think it does.
I'm not sure, exactly. I didn't think schools had them.”

“Neither did I,” I said sadly. “What do we do?” I placed my hand over the rectangle, trying to stifle the beeps, but I had no idea how it worked. The rectangle began to scream.

“We get the hell out of here,” said Keegan, touching his sister's arm.

“No,” I protested, but the three of them were halfway through the doors. “Wait. People are going to arrive. They're all going to—”

“Be arrested,” said Taylor. He stepped back through the doors.

“We can't let that happen to them. They'll never trust us again. We invited them here.”

“Lora.” His voice was soft. I didn't remember him coming so close, but he was right there, his hand on my arm. “I don't know what else we can do.”

“Wait,” I said, allowing him to lead me outside. “Wait.”

When we reached the steps, I stopped, staring back into the school. “That's a security system. Unity has a security guard. Maybe he's the one who gets the signal.” I held out my hands, exasperated. “Isn't that possible?”

“Maybe,” said Keegan. “But what difference does it make? We can't stop him any more than the cops.”

“Maybe we can.” I smiled at Kylie. “Hey, I hear Alexia owes you a favor.”

–––––

Alexia must not have kicked her sleeping pill habit. She was incredibly difficult to rouse. When she finally awoke, after the fourth desperate phone call, she did not react well to Kylie's inquiries.

“Why the hell do you need to know who responds to the security system?”

Kylie looked at me. We were sharing the phone between us, huddled in the corner of the park, while the boys scanned the lot for signs of police. For a moment I expected Kylie to create some elaborate story.

I was surprised to hear her forgo creativity.

“Because we set it off, and now we need to know if we're going to be arrested.”

“What?” Alexia's voice was loud and fierce. It sounded like she knocked something over.

“I know it sounds crazy,” Kylie said, “but we need to know if the signal goes to the police or Mr. Jenkins, and we need to know soon. Can you please just help me and yell at me later?”

Alexia did not respond immediately. “How much time has passed since you set off the alarm?”

“Five minutes. An hour. I don't know!”

“Kylie.”

“Okay. Like, six minutes. Does it even matter?”

“It would have mattered if you'd turned the thing off in time.”

“We can't turn it off. We don't know the code.”

“Four four four two.”

“Are you kidding me?”

“I went to lunch with Jim the week it was installed.”

“So it was installed by him. Wait, you went to lunch—
”

“Not only was the system installed by Mr. Jenkins,” Alexia broke in, “but it was installed without permission.”

“What?” Kylie and I said together. The sound of Kylie's shriek masked the sound of my whisper.

“He's gotten it into his head that he deserves more responsibility. That the school takes him for granted. He told them they needed a security system—you know, in case someone has a hankering for wall-ball in the middle of the night—but they basically told him to screw off. Security is expensive.”

“Baby,” Kylie hissed, “I don't need the details. I just need the general idea.”

Silence.

“Please?”

Alexia sighed loudly. “The details are important. The administrators may well have been wise to deny Mr. Jenkins more responsibility, but he is incredibly gifted when it comes to wiring. His family had a security business for years before some conglomerate forced them out of business.”

“That's terrible,” Kylie said without enthusiasm.

“It
is
terrible. He went from being his own boss to making, like, eight cents an hour babysitting assholes.”

“Tragic,” Kylie agreed.

“He's had a bit of a renegade in him since all that happened, and he's been looking for a way to get back in the game. So when the School Board shut down his idea, it was the last straw. He installed his own system in the middle of the night and hid it so no one would see. I think his plan is to intercept some bandit on the run from the law and receive the key to the city. The man watches too much TV.”

“That's a heart-wrenching story,” said Kylie, “but now he's on his way to bust
us
and get half the senior class expelled.”

“Well.” Alexia huffed into the phone. “And here I thought I had the most interesting story of the night.”

“Okay,” Kylie said, almost dropping the phone in her exasperation, “I'll tell you everything. I'll do anything you ask. I just need you to come down here and intercept Janky Jim and get rid of him.”

“Oh, is that all?”

“I know it's a lot to ask—”

“More
crazy
than anything else.”

“But it's really important to me, and if you give me a chance to explain—”

“Kylie. I'm, like, two minutes away.”

“What?”

“All gussied up and ready to win that Oscar.”

“How did you—we've been on the phone the whole time. Do you
sleep
in your clothes?”

“Sweet pea, I'm the Student Body President and Homecoming Queen. I can get dressed while I'm driving.”

“But how did you know?” Kylie asked, her breath coming out in little puffs.

Alexia made a popping sound with her lips. “I always know when you need me. Go turn off the alarm.”

–––––

Mr. Jim Jenkins had only just turned off his pickup when Alexia came running across the field from the other side of the school. Her heels squished as they dug into the wet grass. Mud sloshed over her designer jeans. But she didn't falter until she reached the stone steps and sat down.

The school was dark. More clouds had settled in front of the moon, and the four of us took refuge behind a voluptuous oak. We could hear Alexia tapping her shoe on the cement, but we could not see her through the trunk of the tree.

A moment later, Mr. Jenkins trudged across the grass.

Alexia immediately began to cry. I did not know whether tears actually streamed down her face, but the sobs escaping her lips were metered to perfection.

She's done this before.

Climbing up the trunk, I peered through the thick foliage and watched Mr. Jenkins sit down. The pants of his dung-brown uniform inched up, revealing mismatched socks.

“Miss Mardsen?” he asked tentatively. His hand lingered a moment above her knee before he placed it in his lap. Tufts of silver hair stuck out from under his cap.

“I'm sorry,” Alexia said, erupting in fresh sobs. “I'm so sorry. I didn't know what else to do.”

“I'm not sure I understand what you did,” Mr. Jenkins said after a moment. “You don't mean to say … ” He glanced at the school doors.