The Lady Who Lived Again (30 page)

He blinked again, certain he was losing his mind. His eyes weren’t deceiving him, though, and the reality of it hit him like a barreling train.

The wound had healed.

“Christ Almighty.” Jace spun to Maddie, heart pounding. He stared at her, dazed and speechless, as he struggled for words. “What…?”

Maddie took a step toward him.

He took a step back. “How…?”

She shrugged, shaking her head. “I don’t know—”

“How?” The anger in his tone boomed through the room as he strode toward her.

“I don’t know! After the accident something happened. I was massaging my injured leg, and I felt something strange. It healed. I don’t know how.”

He shook his head, trying to shake away the absurdity of what he was hearing.

“I wanted to tell you.”

His eyes pinned hers. “You wanted to tell me?” he shouted.

She swallowed any futile reply.

“But instead you deceived me. You kept me in the dark. All this time.” Her deception sickened him, tainting all that they’d shared. This woman he thought he knew so well now stood a stranger before him. His troubled mind reeled.

Shifting his weight for stability, he braced himself against his next thought. “My patients?” he asked.

She lowered her eyes.

“You were healing my patients?” He stared, stunned as this registered. “You were healing my patients under my nose.” He glared, fists clenched. “Playing me for a fool!”

She shook her head. “I just wanted to help.” Tears welled in her eyes. “I couldn’t tell you. I wanted to protect you. I just wanted…I wanted…to be normal.”

“But you’re not normal!” Anger erupted inside him. The words spewed forth of their own volition. “None of this is normal!” The glaring truth of this pained him physically. Mentally. And everywhere in between. His turmoil unleashed a ruthlessness he couldn’t contain. “All this time I was defending you. Trying to convince people they were wrong about you. That you weren’t some freak of nature. But you are!”

Her gasp of anguish hurtled him back to his senses. But it was too late. He blinked, chest heaving. The shattered look on her face told him that he’d gone too far.

She squared her shoulders, and the unrelenting strength in her surfaced. She lifted her trembling chin.

“I am no freak,” she declared firmly. “I am a woman with an ability you do not understand. And you’ve just confirmed that I was entirely right to hide it from you.”

She tore her gaze from his, then ran out the door.

* * * *

Tears burned Maddie’s eyes as she fled from the house—from that look on Jace’s face. The image of his horrified expression chased her through the field, even more so than his mortifying words. That look… She could bear such revulsion in the eyes of anyone else—everyone else—but not him.

She ran faster through the tall grass, ascending the small hill to the cemetery. Reaching the fence enclosing the headstones, she clung to a weathered post, sinking to her knees.

It was over. Her secret was out. She’d had no choice, and she’d done what she’d had to do. A man was dying, and she’d saved him. She stifled a bitter laugh. She’d do well to be on the first train to Boston before Pastor Hogle came to from the sedative.

Not that his reaction mattered to her. She could not care less about any of them. Except Jace. Poor, logical, sensible, Jace. She’d turned his world on its ear. He would spend the rest of his days hating her and trying to figure out how she’d done it. How a simple girl’s fingers had stopped an artery from bleeding and closed torn flesh in a matter of moments.

All along, he had considered her as some oddity to study. Well, she’d certainly given him ample material to analyze now.

The loss of Jace, his friendship, his kiss, of being held safely in his arms, ricocheted through the hollowness inside her. She yearned for his comfort in this moment, so much that it felt as if she might die without it. But she wouldn’t die. She would survive.

She glanced to the fresh plot of earth that marked Grandfather’s grave. The memory of his words chimed in her ears. “You’ll have to find your guts, girl, but you’ll find them.”

She settled back on the grass, calming. She had to leave town as soon as possible. She’d finish packing her belongings tonight and depart first thing in the morning. Until then, she’d stay out of sight. While she gave not a damn about the Hogles and what would ensue when they discovered what she’d done, she hadn’t the stamina to face Jace again. Not that she thought for a moment that he would seek her out.

She would never forget the horrified look on his face when he realized what she was capable of. And she knew with utmost certainty that for as long as he lived, he’d never forget it either.

* * * *

Jace sat, staring at Pastor Hogle’s sedated form on the bed. The man slept soundly, but Jace’s restless nerves kept his heart racing in his chest. What had Maddie done? He shook his head to clear his mind. She had somehow healed the gunshot wound.

He frowned. Just as she had probably healed the horse the other night. And Joey Cleary. And who knew how many others. He ran a stiff hand through his hair. “Goddamn it,” he ground through clenched teeth. The upsurge of anger pulled him to his feet. He stormed to the parlor and grabbed Mr. Sutter’s bottle of port. In one long swallow he guzzled down what was left.

All these weeks, he’d thought he knew her. He’d thought he loved her. But she was a stranger. He knew her no better today than he had the first time he’d laid eyes on her in the forest. The sweet taste of the port lurched in his throat. The deer… He’d hit that deer with a kill shot that morning, and she’d healed it.

He slumped into a chair, head hung low. Everything he knew about life, about science and reason, Maddie had scattered like withered leaves to the breeze. But he felt more crushed by her deception than anything else. She hadn’t trusted him enough to tell him the truth. She’d let him go on defending her and caring for her. Loving her.

And now he had Pastor Hogle to deal with. Although the pastor was heavily sedated, it was not as if Jace could simply tell the man the wound was a graze.

What the hell would become of Maddie now?

Walking through the quiet house, Jace went back to the bedroom to check on the pastor. As expected, the man still slept soundly. Rhetta had returned from town and notified Jace that Gil had gone for the pastor’s family. Maddie was nowhere in sight.

Jace pushed thoughts of her from his mind. He hadn’t time for them now. Once the Hogles arrived, he’d have to tell them something.

At the sound of the family’s frantic arrival outside the door, Jace took a deep breath and stepped out to face them.

Gertrude clutched Daniel’s arm, on the verge of hysterics. As always, Dolly stood quietly behind them.

“He’ll survive,” Jace announced.

Unified sighs of relief filled the room. Gertrude clutched Daniel tighter.

“Matthew is dead,” Jace said.

A heavy silence fell over the family as Dolly took a step forward. She lifted her chin. “At least Madeline is safe from his lunacy now.”

“Save your worries for Uncle, not her,” Gertrude scolded.

Jace frowned, suppressing his instinct to defend Maddie, even now in the midst of this mess. “You can all wait in the parlor,” he said. “I’ll let you know when he wakes. He can’t be moved for some time, but he will recover.” Jace could sort out the details of explaining the pastor’s recovery later, but first he needed to see how much the man remembered.

* * * *

Pastor Hogle’s eyes fluttered open, but he didn’t move. Jace watched as the man blinked hard, trying to focus. Jace had given him a strong sedative, and as the pastor blinked again, as though the room spun around him, it was obvious he was still disoriented from the effects of the heavy dosage.

“Where am I?”

“You’re at the Sutter house,” Jace said.

“Am I dying?”

“Not anymore.” Jace reached for his stethoscope, then checked the man’s heart rate and pulse. He’d lost a great deal of blood, but his weak pulse had grown stronger.

“Did he kill her?”

Jace stiffened, hanging the stethoscope around his neck. So, the pastor remembered that much. “If you’re referring to Madeline, the answer is no. He shot you instead.” Jace frowned, unable to suppress his bitterness. “Right before he turned the gun on himself.”

Pastor Hogle squeezed shut his eyes. “Oh, Matthew,” he uttered.

“Quite a disciple you created.” Jace couldn’t help himself. This whole incident was the pastor’s fault for poisoning a young mind without giving a thought to the potential consequences.

Pastor Hogle glanced to his bandaged stomach. “Did you remove the bullet?” he asked.

“There was no need to remove it.” Jace thought about what the hell to say. He was a doctor and had never before lied to a patient. He’d taken an oath. “It went straight through. You’ve lost a lot of blood, though. You must rest. Let the sedative work off. Your family is waiting outside, and you can see them later after you’re more clear headed.” Jace started for the door.

“Doctor Merrick?”

Jace stopped and turned to face him.

“I was dying. I felt it.”

He nodded. “Yes, Pastor, you were.”

Pastor Hogle’s eyes fluttered closed as he succumbed to the drug.

* * * *

A few hours later, Pastor Hogle awoke with one question. “What happened?”

Jace shrugged, not quite sure how to reply. “Tell me what you recall.”

“Matthew shot me.”

“That’s what happened.”

“But…” Pastor Hogle placed his hands on his stomach. “I feel no pain. No pain at all.”

“I wish I could explain it to you, but I’m not sure I can explain it to myself.”

“She did something, didn’t she?”

Jace frowned. “Goddamn it, her name is Madeline!” He clenched his fists. “And yes, she did something. She saved your life.”

Pastor Hogle shook his head to banish the possibility. “I thought I was dreaming.”

“You weren’t dreaming. You were bleeding to death. And Maddie healed the hole in your gut.”

Pastor Hogle’s brows rose in amazement. “How?”

“All I can tell you is that you’re alive right now, because of her.”

“Demon.”

“You self-righteous son of a bitch,” Jace said between clenched teeth. “Even now, after what she did for you, how can you still accuse her of malice?”

“I’ll tell them all what she is—”

“You can do that, yes,” Jace said, struggling to rein back his anger. “And after you explain what she did to save your life, you can tell them what you did to end Matthew’s.”

He winced, averting his eyes.

“Your hatred did this. Your rancid grief. You poisoned a weak and vulnerable mind with your accusations and slander. You’ll have to live with that.”

Pastor Hogle shook his head. “I tried so hard to make sense of my Elizabeth’s death.” Jace stared, surprised as the man wiped at his eyes. “Why did Madeline Sutter get to live when my Elizabeth didn’t?”

“It was an accident.” Jace took a step closer. In this moment of truth, he’d disclose it all. It was hell past time someone did. “Your daughter was driving the wagon. If anyone was responsible, it was she.”

The pastor’s eyes flashed wide. “That’s a lie! I never allowed her to drive.”

“Precisely.”

“Elizabeth wouldn’t disobey me.” He shook his head, but his eyes lacked conviction.

“Unfortunately, that day, she did.”

The pastor shuddered with a pained sob.

“And you blamed Maddie because she survived,” Jace said. “She allowed you all to blame her, to preserve your daughter’s memory.”

“Doctor Filmore came to see me after my sermon that day,” he murmured.

“What?”

“After the day she showed up in church. Filmore told me he’d made a mistake by declaring her dead and wanted to set things straight.” He lowered his eyes. “I convinced him a man of his high competence would never make such an error.” His voice sank in remorse. “At the time, I believed it.”

Jace took a deep breath. “You were wrong.”

He closed his eyes, and a tear rolled down his cheek. Turning away, he cowered against the pillow in his grief.

Jace made no move to console him. He didn’t want to console him.

“Maddie did a remarkable thing, but it’s far from malevolent.”

“But how—”

“I don’t know,” Jace said, shaking his head. “All I know is that you were dying. And she could have kept her ability to herself and just let you die. But instead she risked everything to save you—a man hell bent on destroying her. A man whose death would have made her life easier. Without you carrying the torch of hatred, people here might have found their way toward acceptance. That’s the woman you call a demon.” Jace restrained the emotion welling inside him. “I don’t know how, or even why, she saved your life. But she did a miraculous thing—a good thing.”

Jace heard the sound of his own words, as if someone else had spoken them. What a hypocrite he was, what a coward. How could he, of all people, reject such convincing advice? Whether he was attempting to persuade the pastor or himself remained unclear. He knew only the truth in it. And what he felt in his heart. “You owe Madeline your life,” Jace said.

The pastor opened his eyes, looking stricken. “And how do you propose I repay that debt?”

“By doing what’s right,” Jace said. “Maddie has been gifted with an ability neither of us understands. I am a man of science. If I can try to accept it, shouldn’t you, as a man of faith, do the same?”

Jace left the pastor to rest and slipped out the back door. He needed some time alone. He needed to think. Walking off his restless energy, he drank in the familiar sights, the trees and the birds, in some unquenchable thirst for normalcy. The world around him remained unchanged, and yet everything was different. The tightly knit fabric of his life had unraveled.

He strode across the lush lawn until he reached the lake. As he stared out at the rippling water, the whirl of his thoughts settled on what he’d witnessed in that room. What Maddie’s small hands had accomplished.