The Keys to Jericho (30 page)

She shakes her head. “Not past tense.”

What the hell? I can practically hear my dad’s self-righteousness.

“I… I… I’m…”
I’m a fucking clueless idiot.

She gives me a side-glance as I stare at her in astonishment. “Did you like
me
, even a little?”

I swallow and hoarsely whisper, “Kat…”

Shaking her head again, she sadly laughs at the windshield. “It’s okay. You don’t have to say anything.”

I automatically say, “It was more than
a little
.” Fuck. There’s no turning back now.

Kat swings her head to me, her eyes widen and she inhales a cutting breath. She honestly didn’t know? I’m not the only one who was clueless?

She asks, “So, you really had wanted to ask me out?” I nod without hesitation.

A relieved smile graces her face and she shifts toward me. “I have another confession to make then. We’ve been going out on dates.”

I’m confused. “What?”

“Don’t you realize we’ve spent every day this week together, all day? Talking, driving, eating, laughing. Did you hate spending so much time with me?” I shake my head and she giggles. “Then, I guess we had nothing to be nervous about.”

That renders me speechless, but I am aware that we’ve unconsciously leaned closer to each other. My heart hammers in my chest as if I’m a grade school kid getting his first kiss. Christ. This isn’t my first kiss, but it’s with Kat and I honestly want to kiss her. Shit. I need to do more than kiss her.

Our noses touch, and it’s do or die. However, when I anxiously lick my lips and slowly inhale to calm myself, it only serves to rattle me more. I know Kat is waiting for me to kiss her, so I can’t fuck this up by freezing again. I faintly angle my head to the left, but my apprehension refuses to let me close my eyes or allow me to even look at her.

Our collective breathing heats the small space between our mouths, and I can taste her before I actually do, causing my entire body to throb for the real thing. Yet, my wheels are squealing pavement, and I’m going nowhere.

As I spin through my inner chaos, Kat’s hand sneaks to the back of my head. Her fingers digging under my cap, she flings it off my head, and brushes her fingers through my hair. My breaths become faster and shorter, and I noisily swallow. Shit. I’m derailing right in front of her. This is my worst fucking nightmare come true.

Before I crash and burn at her feet, I vaguely see Kat’s lips slide into a gentle smile, and she whispers, “Like this.” She slowly leans in and for the first time ever, our lips finally meet.

Initially, I’m stunned from the sensation of her lips on mine. The feel of them is nothing like I thought it would be. Kissing has never been enjoyable to me before, but instantly, I’m irreversibly hooked.

When she pulls away, she whispers, “Thank you for letting me do that. Have a safe trip.”

Suddenly, my apprehension is gone. I need more.

Kat gives me a sweet smile and turns to open the door. Without any forethought, I grab her arm and jerk her back to me.

“Huh-uh. You can’t kiss me like that and then leave.”

Now seemingly uncertain, her smile is shaky and she blinks fast before dropping her gaze to the console. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have… I thought—”

“Like
this
.” I reach up, putting my hand on the side of her head and I hurriedly guide her back to my mouth. As I hold her to me and my lips take on a hungry rhythm, she whimpers, turning me on full-blast. This is the hottest thing I’ve ever done, which says a lot about every one of my past experiences. I never kissed any of my girlfriends this way. I was only present, not really in the moment with them.

On the contrary, I already can’t get enough of Kat, which I knew I wouldn’t. When her lips part, I go for more by plunging my tongue into her mouth, feeling her gasp into our kiss. I eagerly lick her tongue and her breathing becomes rushed, making mine quicken with hers.

Now
this
is the first time I’ve kissed someone.

Her hand goes to my chest and I silently beg her to slide it down to grab my dick through my shorts. That would be enough to make me come, without a doubt. I’ve been close all damn day, and since we can’t be alone in her apartment, it’ll be another one-hander for me as soon as I get home.

Kat moves her hand from my chest to my face, holding my jaw as she removes her lips from mine. As our panting fills the air around us, her thumb slowly glides across my bottom lip, and I whisper, “I told you I was starting to like this car.” I softly laugh, but Kat appears awestruck.

“Jared, what’s this mean for us?”

“What do you mean?”

Her hand falls from my face. “This changes things.”

“It doesn’t have to…much.”

“But it will.”
Fuck.
Her gaze goes to my lips before her hopeful eyes look into my guarded ones. “Are we… I know you don’t…” She impatiently sighs. “Can we be together now?”

Closing my eyes, my head falls back and I groan, “Fuck. Don’t go ruining this. I’ve done the girlfriend thing before. I got bored with them.” I look at her disappointed face and frown with her. “Can’t we just…?”

Kat sighs and sits back some. Biting her lip, she drops her head and stares at the floor. Having had too much distance between us for so long, I impulsively lean forward and kiss her neck. When she doesn’t respond, I lick up to her ear, tasting her skin, and making me ache for her when she stifles a moan, masking it as clearing her throat.

She whispers, “You want me as a fuck buddy?”

I whisper over her collarbone, “It’s not like that. We’re friends. Let’s just add benefits.”

“Jared…”

Before I can stop myself, I move up to her ear and growlingly whisper, “I
want
you, Kit Kat. Not just present tense.” I fucking laid my cards out on the table I promised myself I never would. Fucking stupid, but it is what it is now.

She whimpers, “Jared.” I return my mouth to her neck and she says, “My dad is in my apartment.”

“I’ll fuck you in the backseat then.”

She gasps into my ear. “It’s still daylight.”

“I don’t care.”

She scoffs, “I have neighbors.”

“You have a garage. Is there a chair in there?” She shakes her head against mine. “Isn’t your mom at work? You have a key, don’t you?”

“Jared, stop. I don’t want a quickie with you.” She sits back, breathing hard, but with a scowl on her face. “Sex. That’s
all
you want from me?”

It’s like she slapped me across the fucking face. Sex is all I
can
have from her.

“Kat, I already told you. Plus, I
am
moving to Philly when you go back to work.”

“You’ve never heard of long-distance relationships?”

I return her scowl. “Relationships don’t work or last.”

“But you’ve had girlfriends. Why then?”

Looking out the windshield to her dad’s car, I idly shrug, not wanting to get into that one.

She presses, “So, you don’t even want to give us a try?”

“I don’t want it to get complicated and then one of us gets hurt.”

“I guess I know which one of us that would be.”

I swipe a hand over my face and sigh. “Kat, be realistic. I’m trying to avoid a bad situation.”

“Oh. Being with me would be a
bad situation
? Wow. Thanks.” 

“No. I did
not
mean it that way.”

“What do you mean then? Is this your idea of a trade for helping me get my license?”

“Jesus, no! This has nothing to do with me helping you! I’ll help you no matter what!”

“You would just rather do it if I’m putting out.”

Bowing my head, I shake it, and mutter, “I never fucking said that.” I sigh and reaching behind me, I pick up my hat, putting it on my head backwards. “Kat, you wanted us to be closer, and I just told you something I’ve been keeping for years. Isn’t this a chance for us to do that? Maybe not the way you were thinking, but…” I swallow, and leaning to her, I gingerly whisper, “Kat, I want you. Don’t you want me?”

Without giving me another look, Kat shakes her head and grabs the door handle. “Have a good trip.” She swiftly gets out of the car, and I watch her storm off until she disappears from my view on the other side of the garage.

What in the fuck?

I fell into a trap. I was lying in the middle of the goddamned road and she ran over me without a second thought or even kindly tapping the brakes, and she loves riding those fuckers. Rejection is ruthless the second time around.

I’ve been trying to avoid a bad situation, but I just fucking entered one.

CHAPTER 16

“Is this the calm before the storm or something?”

“What?”

“We’ve been on the road for 45 minutes and I’ve been doing all the talking. You’ve said 10 words and six of them were
fuck
.”

“Fuck. Seven.”

“I texted you, but you never texted back. I asked you earlier, but you never answered me. I’ll try again: How’d the park and driving go yesterday?”

When I continue to stare out my window, he shouts, “Jericho! What the hell happened? I know something did because Kat won’t talk about it, either!”

I snap at the rapid scenery, “Take. A. Hint.”

“I thought I was your best friend?”

“Dash.” I sigh and faintly shake my head. Dash has always been a good friend, but I’ve always kept him at a comfortable distance. And after last night, I’m not leaving myself open to another person. I made that mistake against my better judgment and was brutally rewarded in kind for it. Besides, he’s probably more loyal to Kat. He’d tell her anything I said, which isn’t much since I’ve told her more than I’ve ever told Dash.

“So I’m not?”

“Could you hold off on the nail polish, makeup, and gossip? If that’s what you’re planning this trip, then drop me off at the next fucking exit and I’ll walk home.”

“So, you’re really not going to talk about it?”

“If
it
means nothing, then yes.”

Dash mutters something that sounds like, “Stubborn dickhead.”

I don’t care anymore. If I have to be a dickhead to stay detached, then so be it.

Because Dash almost always has to be talking, for the bulk of the drive, Dash seeks out conversation by calling people. Since he used speakerphone, I had to listen to his entire calls with his father, mother, somebody he called
Flip
, and then the best, which he saved for last.

Dash hits a number and the familiar voice fills the car. “Douche, where are you?”

“What’s up, Rio de Janeiro?” Dash cheerfully says, making me want to barf. “I’m on speaker.”

Rio says, “Hey, Jare.”

I glumly reply, “Hey.”

Dash advises, “Watch. He’s pissier than a urinal.” I give Calder the finger as I close my eyes, wishing we were at the house so I could get some air or maybe set one of their beds on fire, just as a warning.

There’s a pause before Rio asks, “You okay?”

“Yep.”

“Dash, you didn’t answer me. Where are you?”

“We’re outside of Cambridge, so we have about an hour left. Where are you?”

“Fifteen minutes away.”

“How in the hell did that happen?”

“I’m just good. Jare, remind him how I’m always early.”

Dash squawks, “That’s entirely false! You were late to dinner two weeks ago! Remember, Jericho?”

“Once in a while I’m late.”

“You wish. You were also last to get to the club.” His voice turns toward me. “Tell him!”

“Jare, you know how Douche likes to exaggerate.”

Not able to fall asleep, I intolerantly sigh. “Why don’t you both go fuck yourselves?”

Dash laughs. “I told you he was in a bad mood. So, I guess you’ll have to wait on the deck for me to get there with the key.”

“I might stop to get something to eat anyway.”

“Did you get the package?”

Rio’s quiet before he chuckles. “Yes. All is good.”

“Did it need extra stamps?”

Rio laughs louder. “Yeah, it did. You owe me.” He laughs again and I open my eyes just to roll them before closing them again.

I hear Dash picking up a sucker he had laying in front of the stick shift. “What about extra tape?”

“That, too.”

Dash says, “It has a grouchy recipient. Don’t fuck up the delivery.”

Rio retorts, “Fuck
you
.” Christ. They’re such a doomed partnership. They couldn’t even operate a meth lab together.

I hear Dash thumping his sucker against the steering wheel. “What’s the return policy?”

“It’s covered. Don’t worry.”

“Good. I don’t want to worry about it over the weekend.”

Rio asks, “Jare, how’s Kat’s driving going?”

Giving up on getting a nap, I open my eyes and glare at the sun visor. “Fine.”

Dash inclines closer to his phone mounted on the dashboard, and loudly whispers, “I think he misses her.”

I negligibly flinch before turning to scowl at his laughter.

Rio says, “Aw, Beckett. You should’ve invited her.”

Lifting my arm from my chest, I pull on my cap, lowering it. “I have a lighter. Both of you better fucking sleep with one eye open tonight.”

Rio laughs. “Is she tired of your winning attitude yet?” I roll my eyes, yet again. I swear, if I roll my eyes anymore, I’ll be able to take flight.

I edgily mutter, “Fuck off.”

Dash says, “That’s a fat yes.”

Sounding amused, Rio replies, “Okay. I’m out. I’ll see you guys there.”

When we pull up to the gray, two-story house an hour later, I’m out of the car before Dash turns off the engine. Since he usually takes his time getting his shit together, I go straight to the side of the house, and up the three steps to the back gate leading to the deck. Spinning the combination into the lock, I open the gate, and walk onto the partially awning-covered, beige-painted deck that has a table and chairs, a covered grill, and beyond the awning’s reach, a sunken Jacuzzi at the corner. The stairs lead down to the small, privacy fenced-in yard containing a small storage shed, where we keep our spare fishing gear. In the center of the yard is a large, stone fire pit that we helped Dash’s dad, Dave, build three summers ago. Arguments ensued, mistakes were numerous, and Dash was nearly sacrificed in the first bonfire. Another example of why we shouldn’t go into business together.

I sit down on the top step. I just need a few minutes to myself before I have to listen to Rio and Dash arguing for four days, and then throwing Liberty into the mix for three, I’ll have to stay trashed the entire vacation.

I try not to think about Kat’s rejection, but the more I try not to think about it, the more I do. Isn’t that a law of physics, Murphy’s Law, or some crazy shit like that?

Kat had a crush on me in school. How could I have not known when all I did was throw my concentration into winning her over?

I would’ve dated Kat, but even then, I doubt it would’ve worked out for an extended period, since I became insanely bored and disillusioned with every girlfriend I had. She asked about us having a long-distance relationship, but if I couldn’t stay interested when they lived in the same fucking town, how am I going to be able to carry on a thing with Kat when we live in different states?

I won’t be able to, and yet again, my dad’s words, about reeling her in and then dumping her, haunt me.

However, last night, I confessed that I want her, the only way I
can
offer, but she refused. If she truly wanted us to be closer, she would’ve agreed. Sex would make our friendship closer—what she had wanted. I guess it’s a close friendship with someone
else
she really wanted, and not me.

The sliding glass door opens and Dash says, “Jericho, I’m not your bellhop, but I did unload your shit from the car. It’s in the living room, and so is Rio. You might want to come in because he’s snooping through your suitcase.”

Not that I care, since I have nothing worth hiding in there, but that doesn’t sound like anything Rio would randomly do.

I shift to question Dash, and that’s when I see Kat standing next to him. Dash says, “Look what Rio found on the side of the road.”

What the fuck?

Incensed, I stand. “What the hell is going on here?” I look at a grinning Dash to a somber Kat for an explanation, and then back to Calder. “Dash, you fucking
promised
you wouldn’t pull this shit on me!”

The sliding door opens again as Dash protests, “I didn’t!”

Rio says, “
I
did, Jare.”

“What the fuck, Rio? Do I have
any
damn friends here?”

Rio frowns as he walks past them and approaches me. “Don’t do that. You know we have your back.”

Dash nods, putting his arm around an unsmiling Kat. “Come on, Jericho. Kat’s here. Be happy.”

I glare at Kat. “You
knew
about this shit?”

She shakes her head. “I was asked to come shortly after you dropped me off at home. It was a last-minute thing.”

I incredulously demand, “After last night, you
still
did this?”

From beside me, Rio sucks in a loud breath. “Whoa. What happened last night?”

Dash says, “Jericho, you said nothing was wrong. Why did you lie?”

Rio scoffs, “Right. He never reveals shit like that.”

“Stop talking about me like I’m a fucking child! How can all of you stand here, acting like it isn’t a big deal, duping me like this?”

“Duping you? Jare, I thought you’d like having Kat here and I knew you’d probably never ask her yourself. So, I did.”

“Well, someone better take one of us home because I don’t want to be around her.”

Dash yelps, “Jared!”

Rio puts his hands on his hips and angrily shakes his head at me. “Jared, shit. What’s the matter with you?”

Glowering at my two supposed best friends, I then look to the real target of my ire. My everlasting pain. Kat wipes her eyes with her hands and says, “Jared, fuck you. I’m gone. This was a huge mistake.” She pivots and escapes as Rio and Dash gape in horror, I’m guessing from the sudden, dismayed looks on their faces.

Rio turns to me with a glare, in which I counter with one, and he spews, “What the fuck is your problem?”

“Fuck you, Duquesne. You don’t know what’s going on, so stay out of it.”

“Yeah, I don’t know
everything
that’s going on because you don’t say shit, but Kat told me you had an argument.”

Through my teeth, I fume, “Understatement.”

Dash says, “Jericho, don’t be like this! Kat cares about you! A lot!”

I whip my head to face him. “Shut the fuck up, Calder. You don’t have a clue, either.”

Rio contends, “He knows more than
you
fucking do. Go work it out with her!”

I take a step back from both of them. “Why in the hell do you care?”

Rio shouts, “We care because she’s
your
friend—
our
friend—and you just did that to her! What aren’t you telling us? Everything’s a fucking secret with you!”

“Like
you
don’t have any, Rio?”

He throws his hands out. “Ask away, Jare! I’ll tell you anything you want to know, but you already know everything about me!”

I scornfully roll my eyes and Dash says, “Jared, she’s my friend, too, and there are things you don’t know. You have to talk to her!”

Looking down to the ground, over my crossed arms, I shake my head with a resolute, “No.”

“Asshole,” he ridicules before trotting to the gate and swinging it open with a clattered slam.

Rio says, “If you’re going to be mad at someone, be mad at
me
. Don’t take it out on Kat.”

I nod at the deck. “It’s not about you, but yeah.” Raising my head, I’m in agreement. “I’m fucking pissed at you, too.”

“I promised I’d take her home if you didn’t want her here, so I’ll take her, but don’t expect me to come back to deal with your shit.”

“Good.”

Rio paces, glowering to the side of the house, around the yard, and then back at me. “Why do you think your friends are conspiring against you? There was no malice for us bringing Kat here. We just thought you’d have some fun with her.”

“What? You think I have
or
should be fucking her, too? FYI: I’m not and won’t! Do I have to rent a damn billboard?”