The Honeywood Files (16 page)

Dear Sir, 19.5.25.

We shall be glad if you will pass us a further certificate for £2,500.

Yours faithfully,

SPINLOVE TO BRASH

Dear Sir Leslie Brash, 25.5.25.

The builder has asked for a further payment on account, and I have to-day sent him certificate No. 2 for £2,500.

Would it be convenient to you, I wonder, to let me have, say, £400 on account of my own fees?

Yours faithfully,

It would have been just as well if Spinlove had not asked for any fees at this time.

In dealing with business firms, public companies, corporations, Government offices, and so forth, it is well for an architect to send in claims for fees on account according to the letter of the custom (see R.I.B.A. scale of charges), for it is no one’s business to ask the architect whether he wants any fees, and later on he may be called on to explain why the claim was not made earlier. The case is different, however, when the architect’s employer is a private person. There is an etiquette which directs that, when employed by the nobility and gentry, the architect waits until invited to send in an account. This etiquette, which is linked with the past, flatters the architect by dissociating him from commercial activities, and it is a pity for the architect to discourage the sentiment.

In a certain high social plane it would be a gaucherie for the architect to ask for his fees; it would not so particularly mark a man in sore straits for money, as one who did not know what was what.

GRIGBLAY TO SPINLOVE

Dear Sir, 28.5.25.

Bloggs reports that he finds that the heads of window-frames come 1 ½ in. too high to allow top of brick-on-edge head to line with horizontal joint of facings. The frames are made as figured on your detail No. 11, but we think you overlooked that ground floor is now 1 ¼ in. below bench mark datum from which the height of brick cills was figured. We might have saved it out of the joints, but we are up twenty courses now. Shall be glad of your early instructions.

Yours faithfully,

SPINLOVE TO GRIGBLAY

Dear Sir, 30.5.25.

I am annoyed to hear of the mistake with the frames. If the detail had been checked with the actual work this would not have happened. I shall be going on to the site next Tuesday and will see what can be done.

Yours faithfully,

It is difficult to see what exactly has happened, but the mistake has arisen from Spinlove having confused the ground-floor line with the bench datum with which it was originally identified. The builder is here at fault. All joiner’s details are—or should be— sent on to the site so that they may be checked and figured up to agree with the actual work. It is likely that Spinlove’s blunder trapped Bloggs; and it is also likely that the detail of the brick cills was prepared after the detail of the window-frames which had to be made early for building in. There are plenty of openings for slips and mistakes, but the builder who allows any joinery to be prepared which will not fit the building is to blame.

SPINLOVE TO BRASH

Dear Sir Leslie Brash, 30.5.25.

I have received report of the analyst, Sir Geoffrey Whittle, and enclose his account. The report is quite satisfactory, but it will be necessary to use specially lined pipes and lead tanks; and a water softener, at least for drinking and special purposes, is recommended. I should like to discuss this with you at an early opportunity. I shall be on the site on Tuesday.

Yours sincerely,

P.S.—Since dictating the above I rang you up and have now received your message and will arrange to meet you on site at 5.30 on Tuesday and stay to dinner. I will bring analyst’s report with me.

SPINLOVE TO GRIGBLAY

Dear Sir, 3.6.25.

I was on site yesterday and arranged with your foreman to adjust error in height of window-frames by building a 6 ½ in. brick-on-end flat arch in place of 4 ½ in. brick-on-edge, so that the top of flat arch will now come one course higher than originally intended and shown on ½ in. detail.

I approved the bricks in facings marked by your foreman as to be cut out. I agree to an extra (day-work) for this work.

I also approved sample of pointing. A flat joint makes the joint appear too wide, and the irregularity of the bricks makes it untidy. The mortar is, therefore, to be slightly pressed back into the joint with a rounded piece of wood. This is to be done as the work proceeds. Facings already built to be raked and pointed to match.

The work looks very well and Sir Leslie Brash, you will be glad to hear, expressed himself as delighted with all that has been done and with the progress being made.

Yours faithfully,

There is a healthy change of tone in this letter. “The band has come.” Probably the Brashes, now first able to see the house taking understandable shape, are appreciative, and Spinlove’s heart is lightened. It will be noticed that he has admitted his responsibility for the faulty bricks by allowing Grigblay an extra for replacing, and has found a satisfactory way of getting over the undue height of window-frames without the loud lamentations and complaints we have learnt to expect from him.

SPINLOVE TO THUMPER & CO
.

Dear Sirs, 5.6.25.

I enclose analyst’s report and recommendations, and shall be glad to receive an amended specification and estimate for ram installation and piping to storage tank, all in accordance with the recommendations of the report. I should also be glad to receive proposal from you, later on, for water softener. This is to serve one bath and bib cocks in pantry and scullery and H.M. closet.

Yours faithfully,

GRIGBLAY TO SPINLOVE

(
Private
)

Sir, 11.6.25.

Rather an awkward thing happened to-day, but no harm done, I believe, and lucky for us. Just before I got on to site Mr. Witspanner, tenant of Honeywood farm, came on to our ground and wanted to know whether we had right to hay in meadow below, and then he noticed our water tank. “Hullo, you’ve a nice lot of water,” he says. “Yes, and we wants a nice lot, too,” Bloggs told him. “That’s my water,” he says, “and you’ve no right to take it.” Well, I suppose Bloggs gave him a bit back, and off he goes saying he’d complain to Mr. Rallingbourne.

When I drove up he was just getting over the gate at the bottom, but Bloggs sent a whistle after, and he saw me and waited while I went down. Well, to make a short story I took him to the hotel, and it’s like this. He will not interfere with us taking the water, but he wants that bit of grass which is not of much account, anyway, after horses have been on it, so the business can be put right if Sir Leslie Brash will agree. But I was asking him about his landlord, Mr. Rallingbourne, and he says he’s the sort that has got to be cock of his own dunghill. If you’re polite, and not unreasonable, and don’t presume, he will agree to near anything, but if he thinks you’re trying to better him or steal an advantage he gets all his hackles up and nothing will move him. He does not care for money; it’s bossing up he values.

Now, Witspanner knows we are using the water and if the ram is put in your client will be at his mercy, and he’s a sour-tempered fellow and no mistake. What I suggest is that Sir Leslie should get Rallingbourne’s consent to the ram by offering to pipe the spring on to his land. More water is lost travelling the ditch than the ram will pump.

With apologies for troubling you.

Yours faithfully,

The remarkable lucidity and completeness of Grigblay’s presentment of the position will be noticed. Not only do we get the facts, but Bloggs, Witspanner, and Rallingbourne stand before us as actual persons, and we have an intimate and minute understanding of the state of affairs. Brash could not do it; the whole forces of Russ & Co. could not attempt it, nor could Spinlove. Grigblay has no educated knowledge of the use of words; but he has humour, practical insight, and the habit of single-minded frankness.

SPINLOVE TO BRASH

Dear Sir Leslie Brash, 12.6.25.

The letter of which the enclosed is a copy is marked private, but I have Mr. Grigblay’s permission to show it to you. It seems important to open negotiations with Mr. Witspanner at once and get in touch with Mr. Rallingbourne. I estimate cost of piping ditch, which is 320 yds. long, at £20.

Yours faithfully,

Oh, do you, Mr. Spinlove!

This estimate is wildly at sea. One can only suppose that Spinlove has light-heartedly mixed up yards with feet and made no allowance for consolidating and levelling ditch and filling in with earth, wheeled or carted, and making good to ram waste and spring-head. Assuming that a 4 in. pipe will serve, a reasonable estimate is from £60 to £100.

Spinlove has here airily tossed a trifle from his richly-stored bins of knowledge to Brash as he might throw a scrap from his plate to a dog; but Brash will make the figure the basis of his negotiations with Rallingbourne. Facile, off-hand estimates ought not to be given. Spinlove would do well to notice the stolid ignorance of Bloggs, who, in common with every other foreman, never has any idea of the value of any kind of work and, when rallied, merely grins wisely. Spinlove’s lapse is here quite inexcusable; he has not been confronted by a sudden demand for an estimate, but offers it gratuitously; he does not describe his figure as a rough approximation and he has not paused to visualize the work involved or even to scrutinize his absurd figure.

BRASH TO SPINLOVE

Dear Mr. Spinlove, 15.6.25.

I thank you for your communication transmitting copy of Mr. Grigblay’s letter. Will you please convey to him my sensible appreciations of his action. I have indited a letter to Mr. Witspanner, which I have entrusted to a gentleman who will call and negotiate with him, and I will open the subject with Mr. Russ to-morrow on the lines suggested in Mr. Grigblay’s proposal.

Yours sincerely,

SPINLOVE TO BRASH

Dear Sir Leslie Brash, 17.6.25.

I have received the enclosed from Grigblay. Perhaps you, or your solicitors, will write to Grigblay direct, as there appears to be no time to lose.

Yours sincerely,

(ENCLOSURE) GRIGBLAY TO SPINLOVE

(
Personal
)

Sir, 16.6.25.

Bloggs writes that Witspanner was on site to-day and wants 5s. a thousand gallons for all water used past and future. We do not hold with this, but would rather pay than be stopped, though we are using a thousand gallons a day or more while the hot weather lasts. We do not want, however, to prejudice your client’s position, so write to ask instructions. Bloggs held him off for a day or two, but he means to have the money so we shall have to agree to something.

Yours faithfully,

This impudent claim by Witspanner is, frankly, blackmail. It is rather a highly-coloured instance of the subtle undercurrents that constitute business, with a big B, in which concessions are made in one matter on the tacit understanding that mischievous interferences will be withheld in another. Witspanner has no property in the spring; and even if Grigblay diverted the whole of it, his claim would be against his landlord, Rallingbourne, and not against Grigblay or Brash. The price he is asking is such as he might charge if he were pumping as well as supplying the water.

It is to be noticed that if Grigblay had not adopted a false position by drawing the water secretly, he could not thus be victimized by Witspanner.

BRASH TO SPINLOVE

Dear Spinlove (
sic
), 20.6.25.

I am happy to intimate that all future anxiety anent the spring is finally eliminated.

My secretary interviewed Mr. Witspanner, and offered the hay for nothing if he would desist from objecting to our use of spring, but he said the crop would not be worth taking and desires me to pay him for mowing and carrying. He has also a claim against Grigblay for the water he has used.

This evening I met Mr. Rallingbourne, quite unexpectedly, at the house of friends by whom Lady Brash and myself were being entertained at a dinner-party. I found an opportunity of informing him that the builder was using water from the spring. I found him a most affable gentleman. He intimated he had no objection so long as Witspanner had sufficient flowing to him. I then asked if he would complete an arrangement for me to utilise the water, and acquainted him what our proposal was. He said he anticipated there would be no objection, but desired to appoint a surveyor to report, and, of course, some agreement will have to be executed. He made a memorandum of your address, and I will request you to represent me and meet this surveyor.

I desire to record my appreciation of the great assistance you have been in enabling me to secure the spring for my use, and which would never have eventuated but for your initiation of the proposal.

Believe me,

Yours sincerely,

This letter is in autograph, written at night and after a very pleasant dinner-party. The champagne is not out of Brash’s veins and the glow of a social triumph newly fills them. These facts account for the unusual warmth and intimacy of the letter, and for the generosity of its concluding acknowledgment, but Spinlove is entitled to gratitude. He could not have been more concerned for Brash to benefit by the spring if the house had been his own.

GRIGBLAY TO SPINLOVE

Dear Sir, 22.6.25.

On receipt of your telephone message yesterday telling us that rights to spring were agreed and not to deal with Witspanner, we wired to Bloggs to warn him. We enclose his letter received to-day, which you may like to see.

Yours faithfully,

(ENCLOSURE) BLOGGS TO GRIGBLAY

Sir, 21.6.25.

Your wire received and noted. Two o’clock Witspanner clomb over fence so I thought better use a bit of tack. What are you bargin in for I says dont you see the notice board. What do I care for you and your blinking notice boards he says, when are you going to pay me for my water he says. Blinking yourself I says you can go to blazes out of here you lousy tup I says or I’ll chuck you out. After that he began to get a bit saucy and I admit we add a few words till Alf Cheese chipped in and offered him a thick ear and I thought it would come to a scrap, but the men wouldnt have it and he cleared off saying as how he was going to talk to Mr. Rallingbourne on the telephone.