The Headspace Guide To … A Mindful Pregnancy (14 page)

The easiest way to interrupt the feedback mechanism and vicious cycle between body and mind is to focus on physical sensation. This does not mean to
think about the way you feel
, or to create another storyline about how unwell you are or how tired and heavy the body feels. I’m talking about a much broader, objective approach – treating the body as if it is not your own. You gently begin to notice how the body feels – in terms of actual sensation – and you gently place your attention on that feeling. Whether it is comfortable, uncomfortable or neutral, choose a sensation to anchor your focus. It could even be something as simple as the feeling of your feet on the ground or the chair beneath us. By redirecting your attention in this way, by bringing a genuine sense of curiosity and wonder to the situation, you are transforming the experience. Yes, this takes practice but people have been doing it for thousands of years. Mindfulness is still around today for one reason only: it works.

So, what does any of this have to do with your baby? Well, depression and mood disorders can significantly impact the baby, leading to reduced birth weight, the increased risk of irritability and the chance that they will be less active and attentive in life, so there is real motivation to approach things differently. An overanxious mind will want to jump on this fact and feel further depressed that you could now also impact the life of your future child; the mind may well feel trapped, as though there is no alternative. But there
is
an alternative. There is this fourth way, where we clearly see the thoughts as nothing more than transitory, where we make the decision to step out of the loop – to be present in the body rather than lost in the mind. This is mindfulness and this is your opportunity for a mindful pregnancy.

Chapter 5, ‘Calm Mind, Calm Baby’, already covered the effects of stress in general, but one common source of concern that arises during pregnancy is
work-related
stress. Many women will continue working until a few weeks before childbirth, and the pressures, deadlines and workload are not always aligned with the impending due date. While it is not always possible, do look for ways to reduce high-stress situations at work during pregnancy if you can.

The truth is that we do not always get the opportunity to choose the environment in which we get stressed. Most of us would prefer it to happen at home, where we can go and sit down afterwards, perhaps do some meditation, put our feet up and have a cup of tea. But the reality is that we are more likely to be stressed when at work or out and about. This is why we meditate; this is why we train the mind – not to become great meditators, but to become so proficient and confident in the application of mindfulness that we can do it anywhere, even in a busy work environment.

The body and mind are inextricably linked. What we do to one, has an impact on the other. So, no surprise to learn that the benefits of mindfulness will be considerably reduced if we do not respect and take good care of the body during pregnancy. Furthermore, what we do to our own body will influence the growth and development of the baby. Approached in the right way, the aspects of self-care that we’re about to look at can also serve as yet another medium through which to learn mindfulness, and they will become an important support to your daily meditation. Pregnancy offers the perfect opportunity to change behaviour for the better. Enter your two pillars of support: mindful eating and mindful exercise.

‘That’s OK, you’re eating for two now!’ How many times have you heard that said? You may even be telling yourself the same thing, as you hover in the chocolate aisle in the supermarket or in the bakery down the street – words that may be accompanied by thoughts, such as,
What’s the point in even trying to stay in shape? Screw it – if I’m going down with the ship, I’m going down eating!
Just at the moment when you most need mindful eating in your life, just when you have the added responsibility of nourishing another human being, there seems to be a common propensity to throw caution to the wind and play out eating patterns that you have previously sought to avoid.

The average woman needs only 300–400 extra calories a day to grow a baby, and that’s at the third trimester. You actually require zero extra calories in the first trimester, and an extra 250–300 a day in the second. That’s it – the equivalent to one tuna sandwich. With mayonnaise.

Part of the problem is that ‘eating for two’ is widely misunderstood to mean consuming double portions, whereas the correct definition of the phrase is being watchful of what you eat because there is a second person to consider. The reason some women struggle to lose the ‘baby weight’ after giving birth is because they eat two or three times more than usual during pregnancy (once the morning sickness has passed, that is). The excess weight that stays on is simply the excess calories consumed over many months.

I was amazed at how little extra Lucinda ate while pregnant, to the extent that I would sometimes question whether the baby was getting enough food. And then I would remind myself that she was trained in nutrition, so I kept my mouth shut. She only gained 15lb and lost the weight steadily after our son was born. It would be easy to say ‘She’s just one of those types’, but I watched it with my own eyes – it didn’t happen by chance or because of genetics; it happened because she set out with the specific intention to eat the most nutritious foods possible, in the ideal quantities, at the appropriate times. No magic bullet – just a steady, mindful approach to eating.

At this point, I can hear the dissenting voices telling me that it’s all well and good lecturing about a healthy diet, ‘But you try being pregnant when you’re stressed out, run-down, looking like crap and highly emotional’. And therein lies the most pertinent point – because the biggest part of mindful eating is understanding how emotions are central to our appetite and eating behaviour. If you can become familiar with these patterns of thought, then you can train your mind, rerouting the journey both internally and externally – creating new neural pathways in the brain, while driving to the health-food shop instead of McDonald’s on the way home from work.

The more stress and sadness during pregnancy, the more sugar and fat are consumed. A study from the University of California, San Francisco, linked high levels of cortisol (the stress hormone) with this propensity to overeat. The study, which ostensibly looked into eating habits around the stress of Christmas and was published in the
Journal of Obesity
, explained that stress management and mindful eating go hand in hand. ‘You’re training the mind to notice, but to not automatically react, based on habitual patterns – to not reach for a candy bar in response to feeling anger, for example,’ said lead researcher Jennifer Daubenmier. This is something we can all learn to do and mindfulness shows us how. In fact, the same scientific study in San Francisco, which also explored mindful eating specifically in pregnancy, showed that women who were aware of what they were eating, and who listened to their bodies’ cues, experienced the greatest reduction in abdominal fat.

Emotional eating affects everyone, pregnant or not. But what few people do is take the time to observe the triggers that begin the process. We’ve all been there, trying to adhere to a healthy-eating programme or a strict diet, only to have an ‘off day’, indulge in junk food and then beat ourselves up afterwards. Cue self-loathing. Cue a slippery slide. Cue more comfort eating. And so the pattern continues until we start to bring awareness to the table and understand why we eat the way we do. For example, what are your eating habits when you’re feeling sad? Or anxious? Or just bored? Nine times out of ten, we’ll discover that our eating patterns are a direct result of the emotion we’ve become involved with but, over time, the more we let go and observe what’s happening, the more we weaken that particular emotion’s hold over us. Remember, mindfulness reduces reactivity in the part of the brain associated with compulsion, while increasing activity in the area associated with self-control.

In paying closer attention to food habits, it’s also important to remain mindful of how
often
you eat. Because as easy as it is to
over
eat, so it is to
under
eat, perhaps through fear of putting on weight, or simply out of habit. It’s all too easy to grab a morning coffee and rush out the door, missing breakfast, but the foetus needs nourishment just as regularly as the newborn baby does. So maybe ask yourself: would you skip a feed when the baby is two months old? It sounds so obvious, but when we are caught up in the thoughts of the mind we simply don’t see these things clearly. Mindfulness gives us back that clarity, offering us the opportunity of choice.

Finally, we come to the small matter of not why you eat, when you eat or how much you eat, but
what
you eat. This is not a book on nutrition, and for specific advice you should go to a respected and reliable website where you can obtain the most up-to-date information and consult a healthcare professional. But just from a more general point of view, next time you go food shopping, take a moment to consider why you make the selections that you do. Is it because there’s a two-for-one deal? Is it because it’s quick and easy to prepare? Or do you just fancy that tub of ice cream and pack of marshmallows because you feel miserable and need cheering up? When we bring awareness into the supermarket, what tends to happen is that we start making better choices. For this reason alone I would always recommend, where possible, going food shopping during windows of calm because you can then step back and, with an enquiring mind, ask yourself, ‘What do my body and baby need to function at its optimum level right now?’

If you need a visual reminder, imagine a seed, freshly planted in the ground. It is the most delicate thing. It is miraculous that it could ever grow into a plant, never mind a tree which will live for decades. This seed is nourished by the soil in which it grows and in the environment in which it lives. Too
much
sun is not good; too
little
sun is not good; too
much
water is not good; too
little
water is not good. Every little change in the environment impacts the growth of this seed. The seed needs balance – a constant flow of nutrient-dense nourishment.

Every single thing that you put into your body, whether you drink it, eat it or inhale it, will influence the environment in which your baby is growing, impacting on its early growth and development. Such is the delicate responsibility and precious opportunity you have when carrying a baby.

If you happen to be reading this during the sluggishness of the first trimester, then the idea of even leaving the sofa may well be enough to make you groan. And if you’re already in the
third
trimester, you may well think that lugging around the laundry basket, together with the extra 20–30lb in body weight you’re carrying, is plenty of exercise for now. It’s hard enough to get motivated before conception, let alone during pregnancy, but a mindful exercise routine can have immeasurable benefits.