The Half-Stitched Amish Quilting Club (33 page)

“It must be fate that brought you two together,” Pam spoke up, as though trying to calm Star down. Or perhaps she saw this as some kind of happily-ever-after scene she was witnessing. Well, it wasn’t. Emma could certainly see that.

“I think it was divine intervention,” Emma said, finally finding her voice and walking over to place her hand gently on Star’s arm. “It was the good Lord who brought you and your father together.”

“Well, I wish He hadn’t!” Star pointed at Jan. “You know what? I’m glad you never showed up in my life before, because if you had, I might have hauled off and punched you. I don’t believe for one minute that my mom left you.” Star grabbed up her things and raced for the door.

“Please, don’t go!” Jan called. “I’ve waited all these years to meet my daughter, and I sure don’t wanna lose her now!”

The door slammed behind Star.

Jan groaned and flopped into a chair, letting his head fall forward into the palms of his hands. He sat like that for several minutes; then he lifted his head and turned toward Emma with a look of bewilderment, as though seeking an answer … advice … anything. The pain on his face was undeniable.

“What was I thinkin’?” he mumbled, shaking his head. “This sure didn’t turn out the way I’d imagined it would if I ever found my daughter. No, this went down bad. Yeah, really bad.”

I
blew it! I really blew it!” Jan slapped his knee and groaned. “I should never have blurted that out like I did. I probably scared the poor kid half to death. Worse than that, she doesn’t believe a word I said. I think she hates me.”

“Were you telling the truth about not being the one who ran off?” Stuart questioned.

Jan’s jaw clenched. “‘Course I was tellin’ the truth. I’d have no reason to lie about somethin’ as important as that!” He scrubbed his hand down the side of his face, fighting the sudden urge to start howling like a baby. “Trouble is, I have no proof. It’s Bunny’s word against mine.”

“Maybe it would help if you spoke to Star’s mother yourself,” Paul suggested. “You could remind her of how it all happened.”

Jan tapped his fingers along the edge of the table. “If I thought for one minute that Bunny would tell the truth, I’d do it. But I have a gut feeling she’d keep on lyin’ about all that happened. Besides, I’m pretty sure that after all these years, Bunny probably don’t wanna even see the likes of me.” He slowly shook his head, feeling worse by the minute. “I’ve never understood why she hated me so much that she’d just take off with our baby without even tellin’ me she was leavin’ or where she was goin’. I thought Bunny loved me and wanted to get married, but somethin’ must have happened to change her mind.” It was all Jan could do to keep his emotions under control.

“I think the best thing you can do is to wait until next week and see what Star has to say then,” Ruby Lee said.

“Don’t think I can wait that long. Besides, what if Star don’t come back? She may never wanna see me again.” Jan looked over at Emma with a pleading expression. “Can you help me out here? If you have Star’s address, would you tell me what it is?”

Emma shook her head. “I wouldn’t feel right about giving you that information without asking her first. And, Jan, I think you really do need to give Star some time to sort things through. Like Ruby Lee said, you can talk to Star again next week. I feel sure she’ll be here.”

“Maybe Star will talk to her mother, and she’ll find out that you were telling the truth,” Paul said in a tone of reassurance.

Jan grunted. “Boy, you don’t know how bad I’d like to see it go that way, but unless Bunny’s had a change of heart, she ain’t likely to admit she was wrong.”

Emma gave Jan’s arm a reassuring pat. “I’ll be praying for you this week, and I hope you’ll pray, too. Try to remember that God is with us no matter what situation we may face.”

Goshen

Star felt so stressed by the time she got to Goshen that her body trembled and she could hardly breathe. She really shouldn’t have driven anywhere feeling this upset, but she just wanted to put some distance between her and Jan. She also needed time to calm down before she talked to Mom, so she decided to stop and jog a ways on the Pumpkinvine Trail.

As Star jogged along, her legs threatened to buckle. She still couldn’t believe the burly biker was her dad. And as she thought about everything Jan had told her about Mom taking off, her frustration and confusion increased. She didn’t know whether to believe him or not. All these weeks she’d seen Jan as a really nice guy—the kind who loved kids and dogs.

Was it all just for show?
she wondered.
Or has Jan changed from how he was when he and Mom were dating?
At the moment, Star was angry with both of her parents: Jan for abandoning them when she was a baby, and Mom for refusing to tell Star much about her dad or letting her see any pictures of him. Of course, even if she had seen a picture of Jan from back then, he’d no doubt changed a lot, and she probably wouldn’t have recognized him. But if Star’s mom had told her his name, she would have figured things out a lot sooner. After all, how many men had a name like Jan Sweet?

Stopping to catch her breath for a minute, Star kicked at a clump of weeds along the edge of the path with the toe of her sneaker and jumped back as a baby rabbit ran into the higher brush.

“Oops. Sorry little fellow. Didn’t mean to scare you like that,” she murmured, momentarily enjoying the short interruption.

I still can’t believe Jan’s really my dad, Star thought, as she started running again. All the times he’s been sitting beside me at Emma’s, making small talk and acting so friendly as we worked on our quilting projects, and I never had a clue
.

Deciding to pick up the pace, Star panted as she jogged harder. While a trickle of sweat rolled down her forehead and into her eyes, she knew it didn’t matter how fast or how hard she ran. The unexpected, shocking news she’d received today was inescapable. She had half a mind to head back to Emma’s and give Jan a well-deserved punch. But what good would that do? It wouldn’t change the past, but oh, it sure would make her feel better.

Sides aching and gasping for air, Star knew she couldn’t run any farther, so she headed back toward her car. She really needed to go home and talk to Mom.

When Star entered Grandma’s house sometime later, the phone was ringing. She raced across the kitchen and grabbed the receiver. “Hello.”

“Star is that you?”

“Yeah, who’s this?”

“It’s Emma Yoder.” She paused. “I was worried about you and wanted to see if you’re all right.”

“Yeah, I’m fine. Never better,” Star mumbled.

“You don’t sound fine. The tone of your voice says you’re still upset.”

Emma’s soothing tone caused Star to relax a bit. “I … I still can’t believe what happened today,” she said. “I mean, what are the odds that Jan Sweet would turn out to be my long-lost father?”

“Are you still angry with him?” Emma asked.

“Sure. Why wouldn’t I be? He ran out on us, Emma. Big, sweet, lovable Jan ran out on his wife and baby. And I’m supposed to be okay with that?” Star’s voice had become shrill, but she couldn’t seem to help it. She was still so angry she could spit.

“What did your mother say when you told her about Jan?”

“I haven’t told her yet. I just got home from the Pumpkinvine Trail, where I went to try and jog off my frustrations.”

Another pause. Then Emma said, “Jan wants to talk to you, Star—and to your mother, too. He was really upset after you left and asked if I’d give him your address or phone number.”

Star grabbed the edge of the counter as fear gripped her like a vise. She wasn’t ready to talk to Jan yet. Not until she’d spoken to Mom. “You didn’t give it to him, I hope.”

“No. I told him I couldn’t do that without your permission.”

Star breathed a sigh of relief. “Oh good. I appreciate that. Mom would have a hissy fit if Jan showed up out of the blue. I really need to talk to her about all of this first.”

“I hope it goes well when you do. Oh, and Star, can I say one more thing?”

“Yeah, sure. What is it, Emma?”

“Don’t believe negative thoughts about anyone until you have all the facts.”

“Yeah, and I plan to get all the facts, too. I’d better go, Emma. I don’t hear the TV in the living room, so I think Mom’s probably in her bedroom. I really oughta speak to her now.”

“I’ll let you go then. Oh, and remember, Star, if you need to talk more about this, just give me a call. Unless I happen to be in the phone shack, you’ll get my voice mail. But I’ll call you back as soon as I get your message.”

“Okay, thanks, Emma. Bye for now.”

Star hung up the phone and was about to head for Mom’s room when she spotted a note on the kitchen table. She picked it up and read it out loud.

Star’s hand shook as she dropped the note to the table. Besides the fact that Mom had taken off without telling her, now she had to wait several days to tell her about Jan. And what if Mom and Mike ended up moving to Fort Wayne? Where would that leave Star? Would they expect her to move there, too? What would happen to Grandma’s old house? Would Mom decide to sell it? It wasn’t fair. She needed to talk to Mom right now. She needed some answers about Jan.

“Never gonna be the princess, holding tight to my daddy’s neck,” Star sang as a strangled sob caught in her throat. She paused a minute and swallowed hard. “Never gonna be the apple of his eye. Never gonna walk the aisle hand in hand; a sweet vignette. Never gonna answer all the whys. Ask me what it’s like to be connected; ask me why I can’t give up control. Ask me how it feels to be protected; ask me who is praying for my soul. Ask me when I knew I’m loved forever … never.”

H
ey man, how was your weekend?” Terry asked when Jan climbed into Terry’s truck on Monday morning.

“It was good in one way but not so good in another,” Jan said with a shake of his head. “You’re never gonna believe what I have to tell you.”

“What do you mean?”

Pausing a bit to get the words out right, Jan moistened his lips and said, “Saturday, I found my daughter.”