The Glass Secret (Chain of Secrets) (46 page)

I didn’t understand what he had said, but the words I did hear, loud and clear, echoed in my ears. 
My Angel...

My body felt tormented, bereft and needy. Oh, how I wanted to please him and to be pleased by him. I tuned into my internal siren. I needed the strength of my intuitive mind to coax him into making a move;
it was time
...

Apparently, he read my thoughts; he spoke, whispering in my ear, “Yes, it’s time.”

His deep voice brought tears to my eyes and chills radiated across every inch of my body.

I returned his whisper with a whisper, “Yes,” I moaned breathlessly.

He gently released his embrace, and then he stared into my eyes. “It’s time…for you to go.”

I couldn’t believe my ears. I silently yelled out.
No!—No!!

He slowly stood up, never breaking the connection with my eyes and his. I saw something painful cross over his face. I reached out and caught his hand.

“Why, what happened, are you okay?” My eyes pleaded. He carefully relinquished my hand.

“You must never return here—take the key and go.” He paused in an unusual way, and added, “The spa is yours. I will have it delivered to you.”

His voice vibrated like strings on a harp, and I sat there stunned that he was asking me to leave. I didn’t remember telling him where I had lived. I was confused and didn’t know how to respond.

A heavy wave of blood
 with a dose of adrenaline rushed through my veins, collecting my heart into a wave and sank it like a rock into the pit of my knotted belly.

I stuttered, “I’m confused...” My words hinged. “I mean you don’t even know where I live.”

“That’s the easy part...I will find you, again.” At the time, I barely heard what he had said. Nothing was registering in my cognitive mind.

Then it hit me like a ton of bricks, I was blindsided. Here, I was ready to surrender to a man that I absolutely knew nothing about, nor did he know anything about me. I was willing to do the deed with him, a stranger. But, I didn’t care. I wanted to be with him. I was so convinced of this. I felt it. We were one with each other. Not in a physical way, it was something much deeper. So, why was he asking me to go now?

“I don’t understand. What about this? I felt something special, an energy between us that was undeniable—I mean you even said—”

He interrupted, “I told you it was powerful—don’t let it fool you. Are you sure you still want the spa?”

“No, yes...Rain it’s not the spa—it’s more than that, I felt it before we—”

I held back the tears that swam in my eyes. A stone had been dropped on my chest. Shame washed over me. The chamber seemed to lose its glorious charm of enchantment. I watched in disbelief as he slipped on a black robe that was draped over the edge of the spa.

Rain’s forearms leaned on the rim of the spa with one knee up in a marriage proposal position, and he said, “You are perfect. An angel, a gift to a man like me, and it was a privilege to be with you today—please, understand—it’s complicated.”

“Complicated. Are you married?” I felt tears cresting in my eyes. Great, I had almost surrendered my virginity to a married man.

“No, Brielle, I am not married.” His lips twisted into a tight line. I sighed with immense relief. He seemed disappointed that I had asked such a question.

“Then, why? You can’t just leave! What is wrong?” My words hinged on the edge of anger. “I can’t believe I allowed you—allowed this to happen. I didn’t question you one bit because I felt it—you did too, something beyond words.” My voice broke into a whisper. “Something
 powerful...”

As I spoke, he seemed to shrink before my eyes. My tears broke, and I began to cry, “Rain, in these moments when we were—oh, you have no idea, do you, I must look like a fool because I feel like one right now...why did you stop?” I asked between my sobs. “I have never felt so humiliated. I feel as if you made me fall for you on purpose. I would have never allowed another man to win me so easily, not even one that I had dated, and now you are making me beg you. I want to understand what has happened. What did I do wrong?” He just stood and stared down at me as I rambled on. “Have we met before? Is this some kind of pay back? Do you have a girlfriend?  Answer me, damn it!”

I saw tears form in his eyes, but they did not break. He answered, “You came too soon and so unexpected, yet I expected you. I knew you would come. It was no surprise to me that you came here today.”

All I could do was sit there, stunned by what he had just said. What kind of game was he playing? I felt anger and in the catch of the moment, seeing the despair in his eyes, I felt real love for him.

There was something happening between us beyond my understanding. I’m a mystery writer, I know people, and I knew this was not some ploy just to be with me sexually. That was obvious. With his perfect good looks, he could have any woman he desired—it had to be something else. I felt heartache and rejection.

I thought to myself
. God, is this a dream? One of my crazy dreams, again? Maybe, I was drugged, and I’m just now waking up, and I don’t want to...

“Brielle, you are not dreaming and
no
, you haven’t been drugged.” He answered my questions, without hearing my words spoken out loud.

I whispered, “Why then? You knew I was falling for you. I thought you felt it too.” I argued my point. “Why are you shutting me out? Can’t we just talk?”

“It’s complicated. You must leave now and never return. This was a mistake,” he said again, his face frowning.

Again, I felt a thin line between contempt and love for him, all at once. And, there it was again, a look, something in his eyes, a personal war within himself. I sat there struggling with a long line of questions to ask him…but did not.

How could he be so turned on one minute then so done with me the next? How could he not understand that it’s wrong to lead someone on, then—snap your fingers and ask them to disappear? I wanted answers...

I felt his eyes staring down at me. I didn’t have the strength to face him. I was worn out, parched and felt like I wanted to curl up into a ball and cry.

“Don’t hate me, please. Yes, I was wrong for bringing you here today and into my life. I will make it up to you somehow, someday, I promise—I must go now.” He sounded genuinely gutted and it made me wonder.

It dawned on me that he answered my questions without me asking them out loud. Come to think of it, he’d done this several times. I was just too caught up in the moment to notice.

“How are you able to answer my questions without hearing me ask them?” My anger steeped. “Oh, you’re good all right. Just as I thought earlier...when you were trying to seduce me—now you want me to think you can read my mind—what a cheap trick—And, what do you mean by—bringing me here? I came here on my own to buy a damn spa,” I stammered as I hit the water with my hands. “I don’t even want the spa now!”

He stared at me in silence—his jaw muscles tightened. I could tell I was hurting him.

“Answer me,” I murmured, my words were mixed with soft cries as tears streamed down my face. “I was letting you into my heart. I swear I will never let you into my head. You will never cross my mind after I leave here tonight. So, you best tell me the truth, this is your last chance.”

I couldn’t believe I had lashed out at him—threatened him so terribly with my words. I had never fallen so hard for someone in a matter of hours, and I was behaving like a woman scorned. What was wrong with me? The rejection I had felt in those moments made no sense in terms to how long I’d had known him.

Rain’s answer was more bemusing than the one before. He spoke soft and clear with a strong point of sincerity in his voice, “I understand. I forgive you for being so angry with me. Surely, you know the answers. Brielle—you must know it’s not my intention to ever hurt you. My heart and yours were drawn together...I will treasure this short time I had with you forever.”

My eyes fell into the murky water, along with my tears. “Forever?” I said breathlessly.

There’s no such noun—place or comfort in the word forever. You’re either gone or going into forever. Live in the moment, our time is now!
I later wished that I had told him my thoughts out loud, without all the emotions.

I tilted my eyes back toward Rain, and he was gone! Vanished again! I looked over the edge of the spa and saw only his footprints and traces of bubbles across the floor.

The magic was gone too. The room felt cold and void of life, like my heart—empty, vulnerable and naked.

I sat there for a moment longer, the water turned cold sending chills across my bare flesh. My eyes flashed to a thick white towel that had appeared on the edge of the spa. I hadn’t noticed it there earlier—again, more cheap magic tricks. I swiftly wrapped myself with the towel and dried off.

I sat at the vanity, fastening my shoe and I began to cry. Through my tears, I caught in the mirror the reflection of my packages on the floor behind me—I was so intent on things appearing and disappearing in this spa room that I almost forgot about my purchases, which now seemed unimportant and unfulfilling...

My eyes burned into the corner where I thought a hidden camera might be planted. I angrily glowered. My eyes pierced into the corner. “Stop! Enough toying with me! You’ve had your little joke at my expense.” Overcome with tears, I lowered my tone, “Rain, come back and explain to me what happened. If you don’t...I’m done! And, don’t come looking for me.
Ever
!” My emotions twisted back and forth.

I glanced back at my packages and noticed there was a light gray linen note clipped to the outside of one of the bags. I assumed it was the bill for the spa.

I hurried over to the packages. For the first time, I really hoped that he might be watching me. I bent over very seductively with my ass high in the air; a lame attempt to give him something to think about and then snatched the note from the bag. I stood upright, placing my hand on my waist and nonchalantly stuck my hip out to the side as I read silently to myself. Slowly, I read the note.

We met and we will never part, my beautiful angel, Brielle...please, believe me, I’ll be thinking of you for as long as the days are long...I want you to know that you live on in my heart...Rain

I looked up into the corner where I thought a hidden camera might be stationed. Anger stirred within me, causing my fist to clench. I crumpled up the paper into a ball, so that he could see me clearly, if, in fact, he was even there watching me at all...

Then I threw the paper into the spa.

“
Believe this!”

I gracefully lifted my packages, along with my dignity, and sashayed toward the door...Then I stopped and looked back toward the spa—it was suddenly empty, drained of the water and its magic, and so was my heart. Rain had made me feel deeply for him. In the catch of a moment, I fell in love. It was real. Now, I felt manipulated, yet—suddenly, I felt a pang at the loss of his note. What was I thinking, throwing it away?

I dropped my packages, turned on my heels and ran to the spa to retrieve it. I looked into the bath but didn’t see it at the bottom. It was gone, and just like Rain, there was no physical evidence that either had ever been in the room with me.

Oh wait! I thought.

I slipped my hand into my skirt pocket and pulled out the key.

The exited

Before I pushed through the main doors of the boutique, Pierre intercepted me.

“Mademoiselle, Mr. de’ Bluche ask me to walk you home and, of course, it would be my pleasure.”

“No, thanks. I will be fine. I could use the time alone.” I managed to smile, feeling a hint of embarrassment that even he knew I’d been dumped. I was sure of that.

A feeling of shame bubbled up in my gut. I’d behaved so precariously. My eyes dropped to the floor and slowly back up to Pierre.

“He wanted me to give you this.” Pierre’s eyes filled with sincerity. It was evident that he had felt sorry for me.

In his hand was the note Rain had written to me, it was no longer crumpled up, but smooth and as good as new.

I hesitated to take it. “It’s okay...I don’t think I want it.” I could feel the fray pushing through my tear ducts. Why should I take it? I had thrown it away. Then tried to retrieve it from the spa and it vanished. Now Rain wanted me to have it again. This was all too confusing for me.

“Don’t try to understand everything in the moment that it takes place.”

“Uh?” I blanched. Nodding my head, no, then in a millisecond his words absorbed within me, and I nodded, yes. My gestures must have sent him mixed messages, since I suddenly appeared as if I understood what he meant. I think I did, but not completely. What he said wasn’t that complicated, but it was the inflection in his voice that made me second-guess my interpretation. “Yes, I understand,” I agreed, holding on to what he said to give it further thought later.

“And, if you don’t you will.” He smiled, and patted the side of my upper arm, consolingly. I knew there was something more to what he had said, this confirmed it.

“Okay, thanks,” I turned slightly to retreat, feeling uneasy. Not because of anything he had said, it was actually in spite of myself.
As for Pierre, strangely, I felt like I knew him well enough to cry on his massive shoulders and share my woes. He definitely had a fatherly air about him.