The Girl's Guide to the Apocalypse (8 page)

Someone handed a blanket to Robert. He stared at it like he’d never seen one before, but reluctantly took it. He held it to himself and then took in his surroundings. He groaned.

“Not in the mud,” he said. “I’m so sick of mud.”

“Well, there was a house with someone dead inside you could go back to,” I said.

He stared me down. “Remind me to put that comment in your review.”

“Ha,” I said. “Good to see your sense of humor’s still around.”

He turned away and started to walk. So I trailed after him because I didn’t know where else to go or stand. At least walking with him wouldn’t make me seem like such an outcast amongst all these people.

We walked the length of the area, which was full of families, crying children and huddled groups that were either getting to know each other or up to no good. A line for food had snaked its way around us.

“We are out of plates!” someone shouted. “You will not be issued one if you don’t have one already.”

A very loud synchronized groan went up from the entire group standing in line.

We ended up settling toward the back end of the tent next to a power generator, squeezed in between two families. Robert smiled at them, but I kept my gaze to the floor. I sunk to it and dropped my bag next to me.

“You folks from anywhere around here?” I gave them an overly big smile, knowing they would know I was trying way too hard.

The mother shook her head while the rest of the family ignored me.

“Want anything?” Robert asked.

“Water,” I said. “I would love some water.”

He nodded. “I’ll see what I can do.” He winked. “Don’t go away. I’m coming back for you.”

I winked back. He dashed off.

I took the blanket and shoved it under my head like a pillow. I let my eyes close, but when I opened them again, I saw a boy, maybe fourteen, walking off with my bag.

“Hey!” I said.

Either the kid didn’t hear me or chose to ignore me. I jumped up and followed him, quickly matching his pace.

“Hey!”

The kid started to run, tightly clutching my bag. So I ran after him. I had nothing of real value in there. It was just the principal of the matter. That was mine. It was the only thing I had left in the world, and I was getting shown up by some junior high punk.

I caught up with him and jerked the bag.

“Hey!” I said again.

The kid seemed surprised and tried to stare me down.

“Hey yourself,” he said. “Let go!”

“This isn’t yours, and you know it,” I said, gripping the straps even tighter.

The kid tried to jerk it away. “It is mine. My aunt gave it to me.”

“Really?” I asked. “Then maybe you can tell me what’s in it.”

“Uh…Skittles.” The kid jerked even harder, but I was stronger.

“Let it go,” I said. “Try stealing from someone your own age.”

A woman stared at us. “What are you doing with that child?” she asked.

“Nothing,” I said, holding fast. “There’s some confusion on what belongs to who.”

Three other women joined her. “Are you stealing a child’s belongings?” another woman asked.

“No.” I was defensive. “I’m not. It’s quite the opposite.”

The kid started to cough. “I don’t feel well.”

The women gasped. “You’re harassing a sick child?”

“How is this going to affect his self-esteem?” the third woman shrieked.

A hand came down on my shoulder. I looked up without loosening my grip. A man stood over me. He was handsome and had kind, soft features despite his gaunt and sad sack appearance.

“Miss, I’m going to ask—” He stopped. “It’s you.”

I stared at him. “Jake,” I said.

He cocked his head. “What are you doing here?”

“I could ask the same about you,” I said. “I’m more surprised that you’re in town than just in this tent.”

Jake swallowed hard and took a deep breath.

Jake, that is, my ex-Jake, and I had history. Some people would classify as our current Apocalypse as their worst phase of life ever. Mine was actually three years prior.

Five years earlier, we were engaged, and I had never felt happier, healthier or smarter. We had a future, we had a plan, but it didn’t work out. He woke up one day, stopped taking his meds and it was downhill from there. The last time I saw him was around one am when he had pulled up in front of my apartment, truck packed with his belongings. He wasn’t himself, but I thought it was a phase, so when he gave me an ultimatum, I didn’t take it seriously. He disappeared into the night, and I didn’t hear from him again. Afterward, I hit an emotional bottom, doing the one thing I didn’t want, not being hungry for my favorite foods and calling my parents—a first in five years. Despite that, I came back stronger, at least strong enough to weather through a three-year relationship with a man I had passionately mild feelings for.

And now, here he was, staring at me with the same surprise I prayed so hard not to convey.

He cleared his throat. “I was in town,” he said. “When the incident happened. There was a friend. Well, you remember Paul, my old roommate.”

“Oh, so you were in town, stopping by to see people you were close to but didn’t get closure with.” I nodded. “How’d that turn out?”

If he noticed my biting tone, he wasn’t letting on. “Why are you harassing this boy?” he asked.

The kid stared up at me and gave another jerk, but I held steadfast.

“I have a funny way of not letting immature boys just run off without accepting responsibility for what they’ve done.”

Jake blanched slightly, but the kid finally let go.

“Fine,” the kid said. “It’s stupid and smells bad.”

“If you find a mirror, repeat that statement to yourself.”

The kid ran off.

Jake shook his head. “Where’s your compassion?” he asked. “It’s needed more than ever.”

“Did you give him your bag?”

“I have no belongings,” he said proudly. “And if I did, I’d share what I had. We live in a world where some things are no longer important. I’m less encumbered and have learned what freedom really is.”

“Must be nice,” I said. “To just let go of any responsibility and not worry about what people close to you might think.”

He deflated. “It was so long ago,” he said. “Why are you so angry?”

“Why so angry?” I asked. My voice rose over the crowd noise. “Why the animosity? You never apologized!”

“I’ve made my peace with what happened,” he said. “I would think you would too.”

“You never gave any closure!” I said. “You just left!”

Heat rushed all over me and adrenaline coursed through every vein in my body.

“You got to leave and pretend like nothing ever happened!” I said. “You didn’t even apologize.”

He shrugged. “It was best to leave. I thought we agreed on that. How’s your family, by the way?”

“You left in the middle of the night and told me if I didn’t come with you we were done.
That’s
where you left things. And I don’t know how they are. I keep trying to look, but stupid things like this happen.”

I folded my arms, completely frustrated at this gangly man I used to spend so much of my time and emotions with.

“It wasn’t the most positive thing I could have done.” He took several deep breaths. “You look great,” he said. “It looks like you’ve done really well for yourself.”

“Still not an apology.” I tightly clutched my bag to myself. “It’s good to know you’ve done well as a human Hallmark card.”

I turned away and ignored the sound of Jake calling my name. I didn’t even know where I was going, just started walking away until something grabbed my arm.

It was Robert, offering me a cup of water.

“Hey!” he said. “I’ve been calling your name.”

“Sorry,” I said. “It’s just noisy.”

“You were moving awfully fast,” he said.

“Kid tried to steal my bag,” I said defensively. I held it up to show him.

“I hope you kicked his ass.”

“Almost the opposite happened,” I said, dejected. “But thank you for taking my side.”

He nodded and led me back to our blankets. “You’re really red,” he said. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

I nodded. “Let’s just get through another night.”

As I sat, he smoothed out the blanket.

“And it looks like you’ve had no problem moving on,” Jake said. “Who’s this handsome drink of water?”

We both looked up as Jake stood over us, hand extended in friendship. Robert took it and vigorously shook it.

“This is my boss, Robert,” I said. “And not that it’s any of your business, but you left five years ago. And for your information, I’ve had a lot of boyfriends since then, not just whatever comes around. Ask around.”

“Plus, her boyfriend is dead,” Robert said. “It’s awkward, but she’s available, in case there’s anything you kids want to rekindle.”

I shook my head. “These are the kind of conversations we can look forward to,” I said. “So thank you, Apocalypse.”

Jake put his hands up. “I’m just saying. There’s no need for animosity.”

“Really?” I asked. “Is that your idea of an apology?”

He pulled out a bag, reached inside and withdrew something square shaped and wrapped in plastic. “Can I offer you a sandwich?”

I took it and tore into it. “Ham and cheese?”

He nodded. “You like ham and cheese, remember?” he said. “We went to that Subway near Malibu Beach. You got a ham and cheese.”

“Well.” I smiled. “They were out of roast beef.” I said. “Thank you. By chance is there a roast beef in there?”

“I’d have to look,” he said. “Most people don’t make me go through all of it—”

“Sorry,” I said. “You’re right, this is good.”

He offered one to Robert. “I think this one might be turkey,” he said.

Robert took it. “Thanks, man.” He turned to me. “He’s great. Maybe you two should get back together.”

Jake turned to me. “For what it’s worth,” he said. “I’m sorry. What I did to you was unacceptable.”

I nodded. “Apology accepted,” I said. “And thank you.”

“Have you had the tour?” he said. “Not to brag, but I think we’ve got humanity up and running the way it should be.”

I surveyed the crowded area, wrinkling my nose at a smell that could best be described as combining the worst of everything.

“This is all you?” I said, looking up to his sincere face.

“I can’t take all the credit, of course.” He bent down to pick up a stray soccer ball, and then threw it to some kids who looked bored. “But quite a few of my ideas are in play here.”

“Like what?”

He pointed to the far east side of the room where people were doing a sloppy and unsynchronized version of yoga. “Over there, we’ve got some positive physical exercise going on.”

He gestured over to where two girls had their hands in makeshift sock puppets, doing an animated song and dance number. “Entertaining the children, of course. Whitney Houston was right. They are the future.”

“The food line?” I said. “Was that yours too?”

He shook his head and seemed a little disappointed in himself. “I envisioned a large communal tub of soup, but there weren’t any tubs big enough. Plus, someone got murdered in the prototype.”

I nodded. “Sorry to hear that.”

A group of people in the opposite side of the room caught my eye. They were gathered in a circle, eyes closed, singing something.

“What’s that?” I gestured to it with my finger.

“Church,” he sighed. “People getting in touch with their spirituality.”

“What kind of church?” I said. “Do they have a pastor?”

He steered me towards where women were going through great piles of clothes. “No, we tried to have some kind of structure, but no one could agree on who or what to worship much less the message. Every idea we threw out, someone got offended by it.”

I studied them again as the congregation made some kind of nonsense hand gestures that weren’t in time with anyone else’s.

“So they’re just doing whatever they want,” he said. “When they figure out the meaning of life, maybe they’ll clue the rest of us into it.”

“At least you’re trying,” I gave him an encouraging smile.

He reached out and squeezed my arm. “I’ve been waiting to see that smile for a long time now.”

He walked away. I felt warmth of familiarity come over me as I watched him go. He bent down and gave a sandwich to a little girl, then offered her a hug. It’d been so long since I was with a genuinely nice person, and I was being convicted for being so stubborn about a bag. It was all coming back. I was reminded again of when I wanted to marry him.

Robert smacked me on the hand with his turkey sandwich. “You okay?”

I nodded.

“I remember when you two broke up,” he said. “Mostly I remember you sitting at your desk, not doing your job. Particularly the time someone came to me asking for your reports and they found you in the bathroom sobbing.”

“Okay, look—”

“Anything would just send you off. Your cubicle neighbor kept playing that Adele album—”

“That’s not entirely what it was—”

“It came up as an agenda topic during a senior staff meeting. The consensus was, let’s ban Adele’s music. It makes the sad employee downstairs even sadder and it’s distracting.”

“I think we get your point—”

“I announced my nephew, Taylor Lautner, was coming in and anyone could come and meet him and you said you couldn’t be in the same room as anyone named Jake.”

“Thanks, Robert,” I said. “I had no idea how far your empathy spread.”

“Hear me out on this,” he said, taking a bite. “I know when a girl’s had her heart broken. I’ve done it plenty of times I’ve watched it even more times. Mostly because that
Pretty Little Liars
show is deceptively emotionally layered.”

I watched Jake now entertain four kids with a quarter and a woman’s scarf as Robert rolled his eyes.

“I will not talk to you until you get that silly half smile on your face.”

“What?” I asked.

“I’m giving you gold pearls of wisdom,” he said. “Don’t waste it.”

I sighed. “What?”

“He made you miserable,” he said. “I remember. No one who would have cared about you that much would have put you through the kind of hell you went through. I saw it on your face every day.” He shoved my sandwich at me. “You didn’t eat for months. I would see you in the break room, tearing up your food in these sad pieces. It was so awkward, and I was like, who is this sad person?”