The Girl in My Dreams (8 page)

“It’s a date,” she replied.

We talked the entire short distance to school before pulling into the parking lot and getting a few looks already. They weren’t bad looks per se, and maybe they were just looking at the car because it was coming at them. I tried to tell myself whatever I could to keep sane, and I definitely didn’t want to bring anything up to Belle about it, but to say I was nervous was an understatement.

We parked between two red cars and got out. I slung my backpack across my back, and Belle locked the car. I walked around to her as she waited, and as I came near her, she stuck out her hand and flashed a small smile, as if to tell me it was okay. I gave her a small smile in return before taking her hand and lacing my fingers with hers.

As we got closer to the front door, I noticed some people looking at us, but not necessarily in a bad way. It was more a surprised or shocked way, but they weren’t laughing or saying things to other people.

In fact, nobody really seemed to pay attention—at least not that I saw. People were too busy getting their things and talking to friends before classes started to even bother with us. We weren’t going to make the rounds of gossip, and we weren’t going to make the front cover of a magazine like some Hollywood A-list couple.

“Can I walk you to your locker?” I asked.

“Please,” she replied, squeezing my hand a little tighter.

Navigating through a thousand other students was difficult when you were holding somebody’s hand, though not impossible. There was a lot of shifting around and walking behind the other person at some points, but our grip never loosened and we never lost hold of each other. It was almost like a sign that everything was going to be fine.
Almost
.

The only problem was that Trent’s locker was sort of near Belle’s, and we had to walk past it to get to hers. She didn’t seem fazed by it, but I knew that Trent and his friends liked to hang around there and flick the ears of freshmen walking by, and he’d most definitely see us together.

We turned down her hallway, and I noticed Trent in the distance, all alone, standing at Belle’s locker. I wasn’t sure if this was better or worse than him with his friends at his own locker, but I knew it was going to be uncomfortable nonetheless.

“What the hell is this?” he asked, pointing to us holding hands as we approached her locker.

“Please leave, Trent,” Belle said.

“No, I want to know what’s going on. Are you cheating on me, and with
him
? You couldn’t at least have found a decent guy?” he asked.

“You and I are
not
together, and haven’t been for a while now. If you didn’t take that seriously, it’s your own fault, but I suggest you move on. I have, and now I’m the happiest I’ve
ever
been,” Belle said, standing up to him in a way I never could.

“So you’re throwing away everything we ever had together?” he asked.

“Trent, we never had anything to begin with. We had no shared interests, nothing to talk about, and all you ever did was talk about yourself while showing no interest in anything I liked. Theo isn’t like that, and never has been for as long as I’ve known him. He actually cares about me, and I care about him,” she said.

“But he’s a loser,” he exclaimed, as passing students started to focus on us.

“Just because you aren’t the high school quarterback doesn’t make you a loser, Trent,” she said.

“You’re right, it doesn’t, but being some dorky shadow kid who doesn’t do
anything
does. You’ve really lowered your standards, and I hope you realize what you’ve given up,” Trent said.

“I gave up a man-child who treated me like garbage and instead picked up an amazing guy who makes me feel as special as I make him feel. I’d say that’s a
great
trade. Hell, I might even go buy a lotto ticket now!” she said, laughing a little.

Trent slammed his fist into a nearby locker before walking away. A few students snickered and told her good job before walking away.

“I’m sorry for not saying anything,” I said.

“It’s fine. It was my battle to fight, anyway,” she said, gathering her books from her locker.

“No, it’s not just your battle. It’s our battle. You’re my girlfriend, and your battles are my battles too. We fight together now,” I said.

“What did I ever do to deserve you?” she asked.

“You accepted me, and realized that being popular is a short-term status, while being happy is one that will last a lifetime,” I said.

“You know, if you keep talking like that to me, I’m just going to have to keep on kissing you,” she said, shrugging as if it were a bad thing.

“Then I better come up with some more material because those two times kissing you have been the best experiences of my life.”

“And here’s the third best,” she said, kissing me quickly before an aide saw.

Blushing, she turned and walked away to class as I stood at her locker and watched her turn around the corner. That girl, I tell you.

Days turned into weeks, and my relationship with Belle couldn’t have been getting any sweeter. We saw each other daily, she wasn’t shy about giving me affection, and the reaction from other people wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. In fact, most of them couldn’t care less about the daily lives of people they barely knew, and the ones who did say something didn’t say anything too bad. They were mostly just shocked that she chose me, but they got over it quickly. Even a couple of her friends were surprised, but I’d gotten to know them enough at the lunch table that I was accepted and it was left at that.

As I sat in Dr. Grier’s office, waiting for her to come in from talking to my mom, I thought about how far I’d come since I first started seeing her. I was a typical jaded, annoyed teenager who wanted nothing to do with her or therapy. Now I talked more openly, though there were still some subjects I didn’t want to speak about. I wasn’t sure if it was Belle that did this to me, but I liked it, and I wasn’t planning on stopping it.

“Okay, Theodore,” Dr. Grier said as she walked back inside.

“Everything okay?” I asked.

“Everything is great. In fact, I have some great news for you. After today’s session, you won’t be coming in weekly anymore. You’ll go to once every two weeks, and from there you could even stop coming altogether,” she said.

“Wow, that sounds great! If you don’t mind me asking, is there any reason why?” I asked.

“I feel you’ve made significant progress from the first time you came here, and I’m not sure that you’ll truly benefit from meeting once every week. I’m very proud of you,” she said before picking up her notes.

Maybe things really were coming together for me. I could only imagine what things would be like when I was ready to stop coming altogether, and I was hoping that came sooner than later. It wasn’t anything against Dr. Grier, but I knew I could stand on my own two feet easier than she and my mother thought.

“So, tell me about your week, Theodore. Are you and Annabelle still going strong?” she asked.

“Yup, couldn’t be better,” I replied.

“That’s good to hear. Many times, when we begin to romantically date somebody who we already know, especially when we’ve known that person for quite some time, the relationships can be much stronger than ones where we don’t have that connection beforehand,” Dr. Grier said.

“I’d have to agree. Even though we didn’t talk for a while, it didn’t seem to matter. We picked up where we left off,” I said.

“I would attribute that to your strong childhood bond. You went through great and not-so-great times together when you were your youngest and most impressionable, and I think that has something to do with why you’re so great together now. You trust her, more than you do anybody else, and it shows,” she said.

She definitely wasn’t wrong, that was for sure. I thought being so close so early in life was some kind of strength for us. We knew that no matter what went wrong, we had each other, and when you’re a little kid, sometimes all you need is that kind of comfort and security.

The rest of the session went well, and Dr. Grier didn’t even bring up my father once. If anybody was making progress, it was her with that subject, which she just couldn’t seem to let alone before. When I came out of her office, my mother was patiently waiting as she read her
Reader’s Digest
as always.

“Done already?” she asked as she looked at her watch.

“Yes, we are. Theo here has made quite the comeback, if I do say so myself,” Dr. Grier said.

“Dr. Grier, you have Brian on line one,” the receptionist said.

“I have to take this. I’ll see you in two weeks,” she said, walking away.

I checked my phone to see Belle saying she had practice tonight, but that she wanted to talk to me later after she got home. I worried a little, since she didn’t say what about, but I just told her I’d be there and didn’t try to press her for anything else. My mother used to press my father about everything and look how that turned out. I didn’t want to lose Belle.

“Feel like tacos for dinner?” my mother asked as we left the office.

“Yeah, that sounds nice,” I replied.

“Okay. I need to stop by the store to get some things,” she said.

Traffic was horrible as we drove to the supermarket, which was packed right after work hours. We got a spot in the middle of the lot, my mom of course coming within inches of the other car and making it near impossible for me to get out. But when we got inside the store, I saw a familiar face.

“Martin!” I yelled, causing him to look.

“Theo!” Tanya yelled as she ran over and hugged me tightly.

Martin and his mother, Pauline, were smiling as they walked over, and our moms hugged it out.

“It’s about time I see you. Too bad it’s in a market,” Martin said.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” I asked.

“He’s mad that you don’t spend any time with him anymore,” Tanya said.

“Is that true?” I asked.

“I wouldn’t say I’m mad, but it wouldn’t hurt to see my best friend sometime,” he said, obviously upset.

“What about Friday?” I asked.

“No date with Belle?” he asked.

“She has to cheer for a game,” I said.

“Oh, I see how it is. She’s busy and
then
I get called up,” he said.

“Oh, shut up. You know it’s not like that. There’s nowhere else I’d rather be than at your house eating pizza and playing video games,” I said.

“Well, when you put it like that it does sound kind of nice,” he said, smiling and stroking his chin.

“You can spend the night if you want. That way we can hang out all night,” Tanya said, gripping my arm.

“Child, please, leave the boy alone,” Pauline said as she grabbed Tanya’s shirt collar and pulled her back.

“
Anyway
, we’re on for Friday. Text me later,” Martin said before they walked away to pay, and my mother and I started our shopping.

“Hard, isn’t it?” my mother asked, picking up an avocado.

“What?” I asked.

“Juggling friendships and a relationship. You want to spend all of your time with your girlfriend, but at the same time you can’t neglect the people who were there long before that relationship ever happened,” she said.

“Yeah, and I only really have one friend. I can’t imagine what it’s like for Belle,” I said as I picked up an onion.

•••

I was finishing up dinner as I noticed Belle’s car pull into the driveway. A few minutes later, she texted me to say she was home but that she was going to eat before she could meet up with me to talk. I said okay, still wondering about what she needed to talk about, before I did the worst possible thing I could ever do.

On my phone, I brought up Google and typed in “what does it mean when a girl wants to talk.” The results all pointed to one thing, and it wasn’t good. What if I was just dreaming about how good things were going? What if, to her, things were just mediocre and she felt like she made a mistake? It would make sense that I wouldn’t catch the warning signs. It wasn’t like I’d ever done this before.

Panicked, I tried to calm down and tell myself I was just being paranoid about the situation. She just wanted to talk about the school or the weather or anything else that wasn’t about breaking up.
Yeah, that’s it, Theo. It’ll all be okay.

After twenty minutes, she said she was outside. I put on my shoes and jacket before taking a deep breath and walking out the back door and toward our spot. She was there, on the ground, sitting on a flannel blanket. Intrigued, I walked closer, seeing her perk up from behind her phone screen and pat the spot next to her.

“What’s up?” I asked with a crack in my voice.

“Not much, just got back from practice. It went horribly, of course,” she said.

“How come?” I asked, sitting down next to her.

“I think my coach wants to replace me or something. I don’t know. I’m probably just being irrational,” she said.

“I’m sure you’re being perfectly rational,” I said, still nervous.

“Anyway, enough about that before I get heated. Want to lie down? That’s why I brought the blanket,” she said.

“Yeah, that sounds great,” I said, more confused than I’d been in a while.

I lay back, and she rested against me, her right arm around me, as I looked up at the stars and wondered what in the hell was going on.

“Aren’t the stars beautiful?” she asked.

“Yeah, they’re amazing,” I said, starting to run my fingers through her hair.

“Oh, don’t stop. I love when my hair is played with,” she said as she closed her eyes and nuzzled her face against my chest.

I thought about mustering up the courage to ask her why she wanted to talk. Did I dare attempt it? What if I reminded her about it and she dumped me? On the other hand, things were going pretty well right now, and I couldn’t imagine she’d act like this and still want to do that.

“Can I ask you something?” I asked.

“Anything,” she said.

“How come you wanted to talk to me tonight?” I asked.

“Why wouldn’t I want to? I love talking to you. You’re my boyfriend,” she said.

“So you weren’t going to break up with me?” I asked.