The Ghosts of the Zombie Apocalypse (12 page)

  Mike gritted his teeth in memory.

  "If what you say about me being a wolf is true then how can this world allow something like
him
[11]
to continue to exist?!"

  The lady paused then relaxed

  "Ah, the old 'why is there evil' talk. Simply put, it's just a bit of desire and chaos that hasn't burnt itself out yet. Give it time, he'll run out of steam eventually."

  "But he's been around longer than anything!!"

  "Ooh. One of
those
."

  "What does that mean?"

  "It means that he's one of those rare balanced balls of desire and chaos. Now that
is
like a mangy wolf. And a
old
mangy wolf at that. One that’s been around long enough to learn all the tricks of the trade. The Master was it? He might as well call himself Dr. Moriarty! Must have been watching a lot of TV with
his
spare time."

  "How dare you compare him to me!!!"

  "I didn't-"

  "You sai
d
I
was not a bad person! Tha
t
I
was a wolf! How can something so terrible, be an act of good?!"

  "...Because." She said calmly

  "Simply because?! That's horse shit!!"

  "Yes it is." She said as she lounged back into the bed "Yes it is...But it's also just how it is."

  "So you'd just forgive him, just like that, for eating everybody and torturing me, simply because!?"

  "Well it's not like I'd exactly be happy about it. I mean I get pissed off if a fox gets into my hen house and eats all my chickens, although I'd like to see em try with those buggers, or if another predator goes and kills my milking goats. Or if some person trying to survive this apocalypse comes here trying to kill me for all I have just so they can live. Or even if someone who developed a taste for murder after killing so many others for their stuff came after me simply for the rush of it. It's all nature! And it's not like I'm not going to do everything in my power to keep predators like that from getting their way. And that's nature too! You don't have to love it, but you
do
have to learn to live with it, or it kills you."

  "I got a headache."

  "It's ok. This is a lot to take in. Rational thinking doesn't mix well with overblown emotion. But it can help calm it down over time."

  Mike sat tensely quiet for a minute.

  "He is still coming for me." He said softly with a shiver of terror.

  "Yes, I imagine he is."

  "How can I hope to stop
that
? I'm not strong like that woman! He ate her and she just burst forth from his belly like it was an accident! How can I hope to do something like that?!"

  "You can't." Mist said flatly

  "Oh." Mike said as if he was hit by an unexpected brick

  "But you
can
lay off the junk food."

  "What?"

  "You zombie ghosts, all you do is tell stories, living of the residue of your former lives. It's all junk food. Kinda satisfying in a sweets only diet kinda way but doesn't do a damn thing for your head. It makes you weak. You're running on fumes as it is. Tell you what. I gotta go put out my friend outside, he looks like he might just have caught fire, and then after that we'll make you something good to eat. How does that sound?"

  Mike didn't know what to think. Thinking felt impossible right now. But if he was going to do anything, he might as well let this woman feed him and then maybe he could think again.

  "Sounds good."

  "Great!" The lady said jumping to her feet enthusiastically "I'm Mist."

  "What, like the fog?"

  "Yes."

  "Like you're parents named you that at birth?" Mike said "What, did they run out of all the other hippie names? Were they like 'rainbow moon sparkle beam sounds great but let's go with Mist on the off chance that she may want to live a life free of magic pony jokes.' Man they must have been wishing for you to live your life as a hermit out here in the forest."

  “Mist was my mother’s name.”

  “Case and point.”

  "Are you done?" Mist said with the patience of a rock

  "Hold on, one more. They must have been like...um...nope, I lost it."

  "Well if you're done being malnourishedly drunk, let's go and see about a flaming man."

  The few chickens that survived the zombie deer and chicken attack were sitting around the kitchen looking really ticked off over their coop being currently indisposed of by fire. They figured one house was as good as the next and moved right in. They also looked as if they were not about to take any guff from anyone about it either. These were 'survive by any means' chickens now and they knew it. They sure as anything scared the hell out of Mike.

  Mike wasn't sure how the chickens were able to see him but they could and they looked as if they looked right through him. Naturally you could look right through Mike, cause of him being a ghost in all, but the way they looked at him loudly said "you only exist currently on that ghostly plane because we currently allow it. We could send you spiraling down into the oblivion of nothingness with one fleck of our gnarled tail feathers. You don't mess with us, we don't mess you up, capisce?!" He wasn't sure if chickens could actually do any damage to him but any chickens owned by someone who communes with ghosts had to have a little something more going on for them. He sure as anything wasn't about to go test them, not when the threat of getting eaten already loomed so closely over his head.

  But with the way things around here were turning out they seem to suggest that getting eaten was beginning to sound like the better option. Currently there was a cup of tea sitting in front of Mike, and that hurt his head because on top of not knowing what on earth he was supposed to do with it, he
hated
tea.

  "What do I do with this?" Mike asked.

  "You drink it." Mist replied

  Mike looked down at the cup then back at Mist

  "How?"

  "Did you need instructions on how to eat when you were a baby?"

  "No, but I'm not a baby that got fed for him. I'm a dumb adult who is in a different body without a manual."

  "Even the zombies know how to eat."

  Mike sat there embarrassed and angry at being told that a zombie was better at this than him. He slouched as he pouted at the cup of tea like a finicky child not wanting to eat his vegetables. He then looked up at the man that Mist had just smothered the fire off of. He was eating a full meal in a surprisingly good mood for someone who was just engulfed in flames a moment ago. His cloths still smoldered with faint trails of wispy smoke swirling off into the air like incense.

  "Why is there a corpse eating food at the table? Can I eat what he is eating? It looks much better than this...
weak
flavored water."

  "Not a tea drinker?"

  "Not at all."

  "Well then it's a good thing it's not tea."

  "What?" Mike said looking back down at his cup "Ohh no. You can't fool me like
that
again."

  "But it's true." Mist said "I can't stand tea myself. Too bitter. That there...is medicine."

  Mike looked back down at his cup skeptical. There was a tea bag seeping in the steaming water.

  "Bull." He said flatly.

  "Hand to God." Mist said sincerely

  Mike looked intently at Mist while being surprised that he did so. But this was something he was dying to ask since he died.

  "
Is
there a God?"

  "What’s that about God?" Mist said suddenly unbalanced by the change in topic.

  The luckless John stopped eating his meal and expressed "What's that about God? I wasn't listening."

  "He wants to know if there is a God." Mist said to John after she mentally caught herself up.

  "What about a life after ghost? Who are you talking to?" Mike asked

  "John here." Mist replied

  "You mean the corpse?! I didn't hear him talk, are you messing with me to change the subject?" Mike said

  "Is your ghost friend asking about me?" John expressed

  "Yes." Mist said to John

  "Why would you do that?!" Mike said outraged

  "Well, is there a God?" John expressed

  "No!" Mist said to Mike

  "Really?" John expressed "I'm surprised! I mean some crazy supernatural stuff seems to go on here. It's hard to not believe in God with all that has been going on."

  "Where are you getting off dodging a subject that I take very seriously!" Mike said

  "There has to be at least an afterlife what with all these ghosts you keep talking to, right?" John expressed

  "I mean here I am terrified over being eaten at any moment! I'd really like to know if there is something that comes next!"

  "Everybody shut up!!!" Mist shouted

  The room went dead silent and expressionless. Mist huffed a few heavy breaths before calming down.

  "Mike, I can understand John here but you cannot, just like how I can understand what you say but he cannot. John
and
Mike, maybe there is a God and maybe there isn't. I haven't met such a thing yet. All I know is what I've seen and God isn't one of them.

  "Also I can't definitively tell you if there is an afterlife or not after this one or the ghost one because I haven't been there. If there is, then it's almost definitely not like how we would think it would be. It's definitely not about turning into ghosts. That only happens with extreme circumstances. I don't know how to sum up what all that means to you without another long lecture. And frankly I'm too exhausted to go into it after the last one I just gave you on top of everything else that has happened today.

  "Now please try to drink your tea. I mean
not
tea. It's really just a mix of blessed aromatic herbs that I have spiritually charged up with good karma. Yes there is an actual technique to do that.

  "Now if you'll excuse me I need to go have a lie down. I'm sorry for blowing up like that. I almost got eaten today on top of my aching battered ribs from a house falling on me. Both of which are something most people aren't normally serene about after experiencing."

  Mist got up and started to make her way upstairs.

  "I'm sorry." Mike said, making Mist stop halfway up the first step. "I...It's been a long day for me as well."

  "I know." Mist said without turning "That's why I'm pushing myself so hard." She then turned to look at the two of them "For the both of you."

  John and Mike both seemed to blush solemnly

  "-And for the lady down stairs as well. Now. I'll be back in a bit. I just need to rest for a tick. Try to drink your
not
tea. It'll make you feel better. And thank you John for all your help today."

  "You're welcome" John expressed.

  Mist nodded and took another step up.

  "Wait, who's in the basement?" Mike asked

  Mist sighed

  "Henrietta. She's my and your friend who rushed you here with only one arm. Try to support her if you can. She's going through a tough transformation right now."

  And with that Mist went up stairs.

  The world...was pink. And not the kind of pink a six year old paints their room. This was real pink. The kind of pink an artist makes by adding just enough white to true red. It was...organic...and alive.

 
Alive
felt like such a funny word now after everything that has happened. Henrietta couldn't remember what it was like to be alive. She had memories of her life but...That was just an echo. She doubted that she ever felt alive while she was living either, not
really
alive and not that adrenalin rush dangerous people call alive either. Actually
feel
the life pumping and moving and living, instead of the automatic numbness she felt everyday just to get through another boring mindless day at her job.

  Henrietta wondered why this world made her think so much of that. On top of that, what the hell was she supposed to do now?

  Mist was dosing on her bed half awake. She didn't feel like trying to get to sleep not when she knew she wasn't going to get any. Too many years dealing with touchy ghosts...Any minute now.

  "Mist? Are you awake?" Mike said

  Right on cue.

  "What's wrong dear?" Mist said almost patronizingly if she wasn't so used to catching herself.

  "I'm sorry to wake you."

  "It's ok dear. I wasn't really sleeping." Mist said with a yawn