The Gateway Through Which They Came (23 page)

When I don’t speak, she adds, “You’re expected to spend your days at the church while I’m at work. Until you can prove to the school that you’re not a danger to yourself, or others, you’ll be watched by Father Martin until he feels that you’re ready. He’s done a great deal for you over the years. Don’t disappoint him.”
Don’t disappoint me
is what she should have said.

Ashamed by my actions, I hang my head low. “I won’t.”

Mom lifts herself to her feet, her eyes still round and wide with hurt. Before she enters the kitchen, she says, “I’m glad Koren’s okay.”

As always, Mom knows, but this time she doesn’t ask me to stay away. I’m glad for that, because when it comes to Koren, I can’t. Mom must know this too, and I love her for it.

eporting to the Church of Saint Christopher isn’t anything new. It was only a few months ago that I spent my summer here. This isn’t exactly a punishment in my case, but with everything happening to me lately: lone Shadows, rogue Bleeders and a beast raging inside of me, they’re punishment enough.

With the
Brethren of Shadows
in hand, I enter through the familiar doors. The air smells of melted wax, and the light shining through the painted glass fills the room with an array of colors. It’s a sign that the sun has forced the clouds apart today, comforting the city of Portland with its warmth.

The church is quiet as I make my way toward Father Martin’s chambers. It’s a bit eerie being alone with the face of Jesus glaring down at me from his cross. After what happened yesterday, I feel as if his somber stare is judging me for my actions, for allowing myself to get infected. That a stupid kid like me could be so careless; tainting the image of what I am—a Man of Light. But how could I have known that such a thing was possible?

Someone clears their throat, pulling me away from the stare contest I don’t realize I’m having with a crucifix.

I’m jolted back a step by his sudden appearance beside me. He’s so calm and quiet, hands clasped behind his back. It’s off-putting how at home he is here. Like he lives and breathes this place. I suppose that’s how it’s meant to be, but even Father Martin doesn’t exude this much confidence.

“Father Raimi. I didn’t know…” I finally say.

He stares in the direction of the crucifix that had me so entranced. That welcome smile gracing his face. “A little unnerving isn’t it?” he says. “It’s like one of those paintings with eyes that follow you around the room.”

This makes me relax a little and I chuckle. “Yeah, it kind of is.”

“Sometimes you have to wonder if there are things out there watching us. You know?” His voice doesn’t give anything away, but his eyebrows furrow with unease.

“I don’t know what you mean,” I lie.

Father Raimi looks back at me, collecting himself. “Yes, well. Just a silly priest and his superstitions, eh? What brings you here? I can’t imagine what they’re saying about you is true.”

“They?”

“I overheard Father Martin on the phone with your mother.” He gives an apologetic shrug.

I scratch an uncomfortable itch along my nape. “It was a misunderstanding.”

I don’t know how much he knows about what I did, but I prefer to keep it from spreading. Not sure how that’s gonna work considering the whole school knows. Maybe they’re blaming it on some kind of adrenaline rush. It’s not too far from the truth. But something tells me that this outburst will be used more as ammunition for my weirdness than anything else.

Father Raimi’s eyes travel down my arm to my hand. “What’s that you got there?”

I forgot about the book in my hands. This is supposed to be a secret from my mom, but from Father Raimi?

I press the book against my leg, hiding the cover. Now isn’t the time to take any chances.

“It’s nothing. Just a book Father Martin asked me to hold for him.”

His head tilts slightly to observe it. “It seems quite old. May I?”

“Um, I’m not actually sure Father Martin would like if I—”

“Of course, of course.” He politely lifts a hand to wave off any further explanation. “It’s just that I take quite a liking to older books that represent our faith. The words from others so long ago are very intriguing to me.”

I feel like a jerk for refusing someone who’s done nothing to me. It’s only a stupid book.

“I’m sorry. It’s just… here.” I hand the book over. He observes it carefully before removing it from my hands. “Father Martin trusts that I won’t let anything happen to it. Guess I’m being overly cautious.”

Father Raimi inspects the spine before smoothing his fingers over the cover. Gently, he flips through the pages.

“Understandably so. This book is not in the best shape. It needs to be cared for, indeed. Though, I can’t help but wonder why he would lend you such a thing.”

I knew this question would come up, and yet, I’m unprepared.

“I guess you can say it’s for research.”

His index finger slides along the tattered binding as his eyes glimpse over the words.

“The Brethren of Shadows is serious business, Aiden. Do you know what you’re getting yourself into?” Concern flickers in his eyes.

It’s clear that Father Raimi doesn’t know my secret, and for reasons only Father Martin knows, it has to stay that way. I would never go behind Father Martin’s back and reveal that side of him, or me. Gifts like mine aren’t something to brag about, especially not those that go awry.

The sound of movement comes from the chamber room, signaling for me to snag the book from Father Raimi’s hands.

“I apologize, Father. I’m sure you understand,” I say, as I stride quickly toward the hall.

“Aiden,” Father Raimi says in a careful tone. “Be prepared for what comes of that book. It’s not wise to open yourself up to such things.”

I stop to ask him what he means, but Father Martin’s door opens in front of me.

“Ah! It’s about time. What took you so long?” He opens the door wide, allowing me to scoot past him and into the chair in front of his desk.

He peeks into the hall suspiciously, looking in both directions before closing the door.

“Well, now.” He slumps into his chair. “Have you had a chance to study the book I gave you?”

Eyeing the book in my hand, I place it on his desk, glad to be rid of it. My hand feels grimy and I’m not sure if it’s because the book is old and dusty, or because what Father Raimi said makes me uneasy.

“Honestly, I haven’t.”

Father Martin’s carefree expression hardens. “Oh? You understand these are things you must know? If you’re to be confronted by these foul creatures, these shadows, you mustn’t be blind.”

He has a point.

“Father…” What do I say?

“Speak, son. This is why we’re here.” He leans forward, placing his elbows along the desk, as if getting closer will get my words out quicker. “What happened yesterday was not you. I know that much. Things are far more serious than I feared.”

Even though I agree, I have to question. “Father, do you think this is safe?”

He waits for me to go on.

I take in a deep breath. “Do you think it’s safe for me to open myself up to these shadows? What if understanding them only makes matters worse?”

With no hesitation, he says, “Aiden, the only thing that can make this worse is if you
don’t
understand them. How will you know what you’re up against?”

Good question considering even
he
hasn’t told me everything I need to know.

A sigh of frustration slips from my lips. “Why didn’t you tell me about Gateways having two parts? A good and—”

“Two souls,” he cuts in.

So he does know.

“Two souls? I have two souls and you never thought to tell me?” Somehow this feels like a dirty secret, something he’s been keeping from me for far too long.

“Aiden,” he says, clasping his hands together, “can’t you feel it inside of you?”

This is his answer?

“Father, I—”

“I would never have kept it from you if I had the slightest inkling you didn’t know.”

His words are an apology, I realize. I should have known he wouldn’t keep something like this from me. It’s my body, after all. You’d think I would know something this important about myself.

I have always felt it. Another me. Something stronger and unique. I always assumed it was the power of being a Gateway, but never suspected two
souls
. The Gateway acting as a bridge between them. One soul that makes what I do possible, and the other one that makes me, well, me. How was I supposed to put two-and-two together?

I glance at the aging book on his desk, the words embedded in the cover staring back.

There’s so much more I need to know. About me. About the shadows.

“Aiden.” Father Martin breaks into my thoughts. “There are things I must tell you, about what you are. Perhaps I should have explained a long time ago, but there’s only so much I can expect a young man like you to understand.”

“I want to know it all, Father,” I say.

“I know you do, son. And I want to tell you. You remember our lessons on the Men of Light, yes?”

“Of course.” How can I forget? They’re my origin. My future.

He nods. “I’ve never told you this before, because I never wanted you to worry, or feel less than what you are. Do you understand?”

Not really
, I want to say. But I don’t.

When nothing is said, he continues. “Young Gateways like you,” he takes a deep breath, “they are very rare. Men of Light are not known for coexisting with, well, women.”

He shifts in his leather chair, uncomfortable with the indication of his words.

“What are you saying?” I lean forward, intrigued.

Father Martin mirrors my movement, our words low and meant only for this room.

“You have the blood of an Original in your veins, Aiden. A true Man of Light. This makes you far more valuable than anyone.”

“But I’ve felt others like me. At school. On the streets. How could I be the only one?”

“You’ve sensed other Gateways, yes, but they’re not young like you. They’re Originals seeking a life outside; bearing children with women they love. But they can’t stay in one place forever. There’s too much work to be done. It is because of this that most do not procreate. They can’t bear leaving their children alone to face what they are, but they must, you see, it’s their duty to their brothers.”

“So you’re saying my father had me knowing he’d have to leave?”

The muscles of his jaw clench, as if troubled by the truth of it all. “No one wants to leave their children behind, Aiden. But you can’t deny a man the privilege of becoming a father. Believe me when I tell you that you children are far more important than you will ever know.”

My leg shakes beneath me, my nerves beyond reason. His words are like an explanation given seventeen years too late. And now, I not only have to accept my freak status within the human world, but I’m an outcast among Gateways, too. A freak among freaks.

Talk about adding insult to injury.

“Why didn’t you tell me this before?”

Father Martin leans back into his chair, hands clasped over his stomach when he says, “Before there was no reason to fear the reality of this. I never wanted you to feel any different. But if these shadows have any idea what you are, you might be in more trouble than we think.”