The Fey (15 page)

“
Huh. Why did she take
you?”

“
I’m not sure. It’s a
little fuzzy. We hid from the IRA at a church in Central London.
The priest gave us a small room and Rita worked as the church
secretary. She met her husband the week we moved to London. They
were married about six months later. He adopted me. He’s called Tom
Drayson. That’s why I’m John Drayson.”

Alex watched the fire burn in the fireplace.
Her mind jumped from facts about this person John Kelly and the man
sitting next to her. She remembered his face, full of passion and
love, the heat and desire in her belly, the cool sand in her toes
and his words: “Marry me Alex. Marry me tonight”.

“
Please say something,”
John said.

“
Why did you ask me to
marry you when you were already married?” she asked. “Do you live
with your wife? Do you have children? How come Max doesn’t
know?”

She watched him stand to place another log
on the fire. Walking to the window, he shifted the drapes to look
out at the night. He turned back to her. He opened his mouth, then
closed it. Shaking his head, he returned to the couch.

Alex pulled her knees against her chest and
turned to face him.

“
It’s a complicated
question.” He paused for a moment. “I asked you to marry me because
I was inexplicably in love with you. I wanted you in a way that I
can hardly express, even now, twelve years later. I had this
overwhelming feeling that if I didn’t act, at that moment, I would
lose you forever.”

“
But you were already
married. You belong to someone else.”

John closed his eyes. “I… It’s
complicated.”

She looked at the small gold band on her
left hand. They bought these bands three days after they were
married. He put it on her finger that day and she never took it
off. With a sigh, she pulled the ring from her finger and dropped
it into his hand.

“
Complicated?” A bubble of
sadness burst the moment the ring left her finger.

She wasn’t married anymore.

She looked over to John to see his eyes
squeezed shut in pain. His hand closed around the ring. When he
opened his eyes, their eyes held. Sliding her ring onto the pinkie
of his right hand, he spoke in a torrent of words.

“
I was fifteen when they
found me. Is that in your records? They found me in church. Two IRA
soldiers. I was an alter boy helping with mass. They attended the
mass then… They knew who I was immediately. I tried to escape
but.... They caught me… Beat me. Bad. Tom found me where they
dumped me… broken… bleeding. He hid me at home. Rita was pregnant
with their second. She was so upset about me that the doctor was
called. They thought she might lose the baby.”

“
I… I was terrified. They
came to the house about a week later. The IRA was desperate for
money then, absolutely desperate. They said that I had to marry
this girl… Eimilie… then work in America. She would give the money
to them. Tom… I... told them whatever they wanted to hear. I never…
They dragged me to a church where they forced this ancient priest
to… I married this girl… woman… I think I kissed her.” He shrugged.
“I never thought it was legal because we didn’t…”

“
Consummate?”

“
She was dating one of the
IRA guys. They took me back to some apartment where she had a fine
time with one of the other guys while they made the husband watch.
They got very drunk… very dangerous. I escaped when they passed
out. Tom was waiting for me at a pre-arranged meet up spot… an
underground station. We always knew they might come for
me.

“
Tom sent me to this farm
in Scotland where his Grandparents lived. I don’t know who they
were. They weren’t his grandparents that’s for sure, but they were
very kind to me. They kept me safe, helped me with this great
London accent and sent me to school. When I–John Drayson–passed my
O levels, they put me on a plane to America.

“
I didn’t marry her Alex.
John Kelly married her. John Kelly is married to
Eimilie.”

“
You’re John
Kelly.”

He was silent for a while then poured the
rest of the wine in their glasses.

“
I thought it was over,
you know. I almost forgot it even happened until I started at UCLA.
I received this letter from Eimilie telling me that she was
pregnant with my child. She was going to garnish my wages for the
baby. I… I hadn’t seen her but the one time. I had no idea what to
do. I worked for everything and if she took the money, I’d have to
leave school. I was sitting in my dorm room, you know, the one I
shared with Max, trying to decide what to do when Ben showed up. He
said that your father, having grown up with Irish people, thought I
seemed Irish, not English. Patrick asked Ben to check it out. How
would I like to go for a walk?

“
He knew who I was and
about Eimilie.” John snorted remembering. “He even knew about the
farm in Scotland. He asked me questions, bought me lunch, and
listened to what I had to say. I mean he listened to everything
from my terror for Fionn, that’s Rita’s second son, to the days on
the farm. It was as if he knew all the players, but Rita says that
she’s never met Ben.”

“
You have contact with
Rita? Tom?”

“
We speak about once a
month. They’ve come to see me in Edinburgh when I’ve been coming or
going to see you. They live in Scotland now.”

“
And Eimilie?”

“
She receives benefits for
John Kelly. He’s classified as missing, presumed dead. I don’t
know. Her benefits have something to do with the Belfast agreement.
Ben told me but I don’t remember. I don’t care.”

“
And you never… I mean,
you were very promiscuous at UCLA. Why didn’t you…”

“
I was fifteen, Alexandra.
I wasn’t a lady killer until I was fifteen and a half at least.” He
smiled at his attempted joke.

“
And later?”

“
I never saw her again.”
He paused for a moment. “Well, that’s not true. She came here… to
this house when you were just out of hospital. I couldn’t believe
the nerve. I didn’t recognize her until she introduced herself as
my wife. We argued on the porch. She wanted money, of course. I
gave her what I had in my wallet then she went away. I called Ben.
He was at your parents’ house. I think he had her deported but I
don’t really know.“

“
Why didn’t everyone know
about it?”

“
Your family was upset
about our marriage. It was like an explosion for them. Ben and I
agreed not to add to the drama with this crap.”

Alex watched the glimmer of Jesse move into
the room.

“
Jesse says there’s
something else… something you’re not saying.”

“
Jesse’s dead,
love.”

Alex glowered at John. “What are you not
telling me?”

“
She had pictures of her
and me… you know… together. I’m wearing my wedding ring, but I
never… ever… never. I gave them to Ben. He says that I must have…
bedded her when I was at UCLA and they superimposed the
ring.”

“
The photos were
altered?”

“
He said it was definitely
me but that it’s possible the ring was added. He was as confident
as I am that I hadn’t… been with her, or anyone for that matter,
after we were married. I assume they keep track.”

“
Standard protocol for
high level agents.”

“
I only remember seeing
her twice–once in London and once on our porch. She says that one
of the children is mine.”

Alex startled.

“
I was very careful. I
always, always used protection, every single time. I didn’t want a
disease or a baby to get in the way of my plan to be a doctor. The
only time I didn’t was…”

“
With her?”

“
With you. I was
intoxicated by you. I think you’ll remember that we barely made it
to the apartment. I’ve never felt that way about anyone… ever. I
had to have you.” He shrugged. “I’m still that way.”

Alex’s lips turned up in a smile then
pressed into a tight line. She digested what he had said.

“
Have you check the DNA on
the child?”

“
I couldn’t do that
without you knowing, right?”

“
She’s blackmailed
you?”

“
That’s what Ben calls it.
I… I guess I understand.”

“
What?”

“
My mother died when I was
a baby, maybe two years old. My father was in Maze Prison. We lived
on the streets. We had neither clothing nor food. And when someone
took us in? We were literally taking food out of someone else’s
mouth. The poverty in Belfast was incredible. Ben says it’s better
now, but there isn’t much industry or jobs. I’ve never given her
that much money… a couple thousand dollars total.”

Alex nodded. “It sounds like you don’t mind
being married to her.”

“
I don’t think of myself
as married to her,” John said. “I am married to you.”

Alex turned to look at him. Her eyes
searched his face.

“
No, you’re
not.”

Standing from the couch, she went into the
kitchen. She flicked on the coffee maker and poured breakfast
cereal into a bowl. John stood in the doorway of the kitchen.

“
That’s all you have to
say?”

“
Guess I don’t need the
vibrator,” she said pouring milk on her cereal.

“
And why is
that?”

“
Because if I’m not
married to you? I’m going to have some fun.”

John’s mouth fell open.

“
You can go be with your
wife and children,” Alex said. She poured herself a cup of coffee
then added some milk. “Maybe she’ll support you while you finish
your residency.”

Taking her cereal and coffee, Alex walked
past John to the dining room and sat down at a chair just as her
cell phone rang.

“
Hey, did you know I’m not
married? Yeah, he’s married to someone else. Kids and everything. I
know! Oh that sounds fun, I need to change. No, I’ll meet you
there.”

“
Who was that?”

“
What’s it to
you?”

“
Alexandra.”

Her eyes followed him but her mind and heart
were miles away. She would move into Max’s house. They would sell
this house. John could just move back to Belfast to be with his
family. She nodded. She was going be all right.

“
Stop.”

“
Stop what?” she
asked.

“
You’re planning your life
without me.”

“
There was never any you
in my life. Only dreams and lies. You’re married. Go be with your
wife.”

“
YOU are my
wife.”

“
No, I’m not. Jeez, I wish
I had known that. I would have had a lot more fun as a Green
Beret.”

He dropped to his knees next to her
chair.

“
Don’t do
this.”

“
What did you expect would
happen John Kelly? You’ve lied for over a decade. You thought you’d
just reveal the truth and we’d go on our merry way. What about your
child? Or children? Or fuck…”

In a breath, she was overcome with sorrow.
Like walking under a waterfall, her sadness dropped into her mind
and body. She pressed her hands against her eyes and cried. He
moved to put his arms around her but she shrugged him off. Jumping
from her seat at the table, she ran upstairs to their bedroom and
slammed the door. She threw herself on the bed and sobbed. He
followed her into the bedroom and sat on a corner of the bed.
Alex’s cell phone rang again.

“
Bring them here in three
hours,” she said. She wiped her nose with her arm.
“Yeah.”

She closed the phone and moved to get up.
John stood before her.

“
Get out of my way,” she
said.

“
No, I’m not going to let
you go off with some guy just because you’re mad at me.”

“
What’s it to you? What I
do, or don’t do, is none of your business.”

John sat down on the bed.

“
You’re just going off
with some guy. Just like that. You can’t have loved me very
much.”

“
I need to make up for
lost time,” she said. “Twelve years of being faithful to a married
man can really make a girl… I don’ t know… horny. Now, if you’ll
excuse me, Mr. Kelly. I need to get dressed for my
date.”

She made it to her closet before she fell to
the ground crying. He came behind her to hold her but she pushed
him away. He held her firm and kissed her. Between sobs, she tore
his clothing from him while he pulled at her clothing. She was
weeping when they joined. Pressing against him, she moved to be on
top then, in her sorrow, she collapsed against his chest. They
fought against each other, pressing and pulling, rising in pitch
and tempo. In one blinding moment, they slipped over the cliff
together in release.

“
You’re not mine. You’re
not mine. You’re not mine.” Shaking her head, her tears dropped
from her eyes.

“
I’m only yours. I
belonged to you the moment, the very moment, I saw your crooked
smile in that terrible bathroom all those years ago. Oh God
Alex.”

Wrapping his arms around her, he carried her
to the bed. He slipped her between the sheets then lay beside her.
She wrapped herself around him, holding him tight around the waist.
Her head rested on his chest.