The Fall (34 page)

Dallas

• Now
  

“This is it! I’ve lost my patience! I’m not fucking around anymore! This was never some ploy to get you back into my bed Dallas! This is me telling you I want the rest of your life, to father your children. I’m him. Fight it all you want, but I’m
that
guy.”

All the blood drained from my face and my heart burst.

“Funny, our history speaks differently! You were going to marry someone else and you have an entire floor of nurses ready to take her place!”

“Those women, or whomever you think I have anything residual with were on borrowed time. Even my own fucking fiancée knew I was in love with someone else...Those days were long over the day I got serious with you. Damn it, woman, you are not easy to love, and I can’t keep—” He cut himself off, taking a step forward so there was no space between us, his face twisted as he breathed in deep. He looked at me again, studying me before he continued. “If for some reason I’m truly wrong about us, Dallas, if I truly am delusional, why are you crying?”

“I’m not.” My voice cracked and I realized my face was becoming soaked. Angry with the body betraying me, I lashed out. “I won’t let you hurt me like that again. I’m trying with you. I’m trying! But stop thinking about what you want for one damn minute and think about me! I can’t let myself put all my hope into you again. It nearly destroyed me!”

He shook his head angrily. “I am thinking about you, have only thought about you for years. So if I’m being a little selfish, I don’t give a shit. You,” he said emphatically so I snapped my attention to him, “it’s
very
simple...belong with
me
.” I let out a long breath as I continued to cry. He didn’t move, but his next words hit me with a force that almost leveled me. “I don’t have a choice in this anymore than you do. We can’t keep running from what we both know in our hearts is the truth. It’s ridiculous to think we can move on with anyone else. I’ve tried. I couldn’t do it. And neither could you. Denying what we have damn near ruined us both. I’m no longer willing to lie to myself and haven’t been in a long time. We were right the first time.”

His hands gripped my neck as he gently stroked my throat as he leaned in. “"We got it right the first time. We just fucked up a little along the way. We weren't perfect—never have been—but we were beautiful. We still are.”

Our eyes locked as he tilted my head up and held it.

“I loved you then. I love you now. I'll love you tomorrow. And if you walk away from me, not one damn woman in the world will ever take your place. No one ever has. I had to learn, Dallas. It took some time. Please, just let go, forgive me, and let me love you.”

“
You
walked away,” I reminded softly. “You didn’t even look back.”

“All I did was look back, but I won’t ever walk away again,” he promised, his tone serious, hopeful.

“I didn’t think you would then.” My face still in his hands I threw a weak argument his way. My resolve already falling apart with every word he spoke. “We don’t get along Dean, we never really have.”

“Bullshit, and besides, that’s the way we work, but I’m not going to stand here and convince you, Dallas Whitaker. I shouldn’t have to because you have always loved me, too. You promised me you would.” He leaned in closer and wiped my new tears away with his thumbs, gently re-gripping my head and bringing me to him.

“I know what I said,” I murmured.

“I love you, Dally, so much, so completely, so purposefully. I don’t think it was ever unintended. I think I knew exactly who I wanted my heart to belong to.” He pressed his lips to mine, gently separating them before gliding his tongue across my mouth. Once I opened, he devoured me in a passionate kiss, tasting me, taking me. Pulling away only enough to say his next words, his lips grazed over mine with soft kisses in between.

“Tú tienes la otra mitad de mi corazón, y no puedo vivir sin ella.” Before I could ask him, he told me the meaning. “You have the other half of my heart and I can’t live without it.” He gripped my shoulders, his forehead to mine. “You are the other half of me. Tell me how to fight for you, baby. Tell me what to do. I'll do whatever you want. Don't take my life away from me. Forgive me.”

“I already have,” I confessed. “I just haven’t forgiven myself.” Honesty was the only thing I could give him as the last of my walls came crashing down around me. He straightened to look at me as he held me close, the pain etched all over his beautiful features. It was surreal that this beautiful, passionate man loved me.

“When you do, Dallas, whenever you are ready, I’ll be there. I won’t hurt you again. I only want to make it last. I want to keep my promise. I want to marry you, to put more babies inside you. I can’t wait to start trying. Ever since you told me, it’s all I think about. It’s all I want, a life with you. The life we planned on.”

I nodded then leaned in, giving in completely to my need for him. I wrapped my arms around him giving him the only thing I could, complete surrender without words. He held me tightly to him as we made love with our mouths, deeply and without restraint. When we pulled away, we were both panting with need and renewed arousal. We were interrupted by a door knock and pulled away quickly before it opened.

“Dr. Martin, Dr. Nelson is on line four,” the nurse said, taking a quick peek into the room.

“Thank you,” he said, dismissing her without looking her way.

On guard that the lead oncologist was on the phone, I took as step toward Beatrice’s ultrasound and pointed. “This is my case,” I said firmly, meeting his eyes.” Don’t even think about talking to him about it. I mean it. I have to answer to him and I am not ready yet.”

“Dallas, you are so involved—”

“Please trust me,” I begged. “She called me here. She wants me. I love her. I want to help her. She’s like family to me, but you
know
I can handle this.”

He nodded leaning in. “Our conversation isn’t over,” he reminded me, leaning in for another kiss.

I moaned when he pulled away then smiled. Dean returned it with a question in his eyes.

“U uu...sted tomó el tiempo sul...damn it...su...ficiente,” I sputtered out.

His eyebrow lifted with his grin. “Oh, baby, you butchered that.” He chuckled. “But you’re right, I’m sorry I’m late.”

“Yo también te quiero, Dean. I love you, too, always.”

I pulled the necklace from underneath my shirt and gave him a sheepish smile. He eyed it with shock, and I saw the emotion cover him as he brushed his fingers over the promise he had given me all those years ago.

More nervous sputtering came out of me as he looked up, full of emotion. “The first chain broke, I had to find a—” He cut me off, plastering his lips to mine with renewed passion. I gripped him firmly to me, returning his kiss with my whole heart.

“No more waiting, Dallas,” he murmured, refusing to let me out of his embrace. “I’m not leaving you again.”

I left Dean’s office with an overabundance of hope, for him, for us and what I hoped would be enough for Beatrice.

I was finally,
finally
ready to believe in the beautiful again.

"Very few people get a chance to spend their lives with their first love. It's a gift". – Laura (Room 212)

Dallas

• Christmas Eve
  

“Oh, God, I’m coming,” I said, screaming as Dean lapped me up viciously on his stairs. We had barely made it home from a beautiful evening of wine perfectly paired with steak. I had shown him my garters half way through dinner and he hadn’t been able to keep his hands off me since. By the time we made it home, I had sucked him purple and stopped abruptly only to give chase as I burst through his garage door. He made it to me quickly, punishing me right back until I had to beg for my orgasm. I sat back on my forearms as he splintered my panties, diving right into me without mercy, fingering my garters as he plunged his tongue inside of me repeatedly. My heels dug into his sides, spurring him on as my entire body quaked with the gift he was giving me. When he pulled away, I pulled his soaked face into a fierce kiss, spreading my legs further as he sank between my thighs.

“You are so beautiful,” he rasped out as he pulled my shirt over my head. “I can’t get enough of you.” His mouth found my nipple through my bra, and I tilted my head back, praise passing through my lips.

“Please,” I begged as he wrapped his hands around me unclasping and taking the satin from me. “Let me taste you, Dean.” I pushed him down, switching our positions as he sat sprawled on his wide carpeted stairs. I dove for his beautiful dick, eager to please him, and heard his sharp hiss when I wrapped my lips around him as tightly as I could. He massaged my sides with his knuckles, drawing out my moans, touching me anywhere and everywhere without interrupting the workings of my hungry mouth.

“Dallas, ha no peuda mas. Joder!”

He grunted as his length thickened, letting me know he was close. I gripped him tighter, eager to give back as good as he gave. I took all of his erection in deep, laving him with my tongue and cupping his tight sac. I braced myself for his release when he gripped my hair and pulled me back.

“No,” he said. “I want to come inside you.” He lifted me, centering me over him and I protested, “But, Dean—”

“Please,” he asked without waiting for an answer, lifting me and pushing the large tip of himself inside. I took him into me slowly as our eyes locked. I was beyond my limit as I appraised his disheveled raven hair, hooded eyes, and breathtaking mouth. This man was beautiful and in love with me. That thought alone had me spiraling quickly toward the edge.

“I love you,” I said as I began to move on top of him, “so much.” My voice broke as the emotion took over. Being able to say what had been held so deep inside of me for so long was utterly freeing. The waiting, the longing for him, it was all over.

Once I had decided to let go, everything fell into an amazing rhythm between us. It took little to no effort for it to happen. Our love for each other unfolded so naturally, so easily. And the more time I spent with him, the more I realized it was a wasted effort to try to resist him. I cursed my stupidity daily. The fear of falling had almost ruined my chance at happiness with the one true love of my life.

I sped up, watching his reaction to me as he cupped my breasts, looking at me with a reverence so beautiful and so pure I gasped at its arrival. No matter how hot the sex was between us, it was always an act of love and reiterated what we meant to each other. It had always been that way.

Dean had
made
it that way.

When his body stiffened and he braced himself, he pulled up, moaning his release into my mouth with a fevered kiss. I let go as he emptied himself inside of me with whispered words. “La otra mitad de mi corazón . Puedo respirar de nuevo.”

“Dean,” I groaned, “I told you I only learned those two sentences. I still have no idea what you are saying.” He grinned up at me, still breathless.

“I guess you better get on Spanish lessons, love. You are missing out.”

I ran my fingers through his damp hair, reveling in his clean and salty mixed scent. “I almost ruined this,” I said as he pulled away from another sinful and deep kiss.

“I wasn’t going to give up,” he said quickly. “I knew the minute I saw you at fifteen that there was something about you. The second you opened that sassy mouth, I was done for. You’ve
never been
an easy woman to love. You gave me hell at every turn. You still do. But I always knew you were worth it.” He leaned in, planting soft kisses on my jaw. I wiggled at the feel of his softening erection. “He’s fine. He’s resting. Let him be,” he insisted, pushing himself in deeper. I grinned and leaned in again as he wrapped himself around me. He grinned up at me and took my breath away.

“I fell in love with you the day you cooked crunchy enchiladas and rice soup for my eighteenth birthday.”

“That wasn’t soup,” I scolded with a laugh.

“I know it wasn’t supposed to be,” he said, playing offended when I slapped his chest.

“But, oh God, it was the worst,” he chuckled. “You were so broken hearted when your entire family took a bite of crunchy enchiladas.”

“I didn’t know I had to soften the shells in oil,” I said. “It was a beginner’s mistake.”

“You looked so beautiful in your white sundress, damn near in tears. You were trying so hard. My heart broke for you.”

“You ate every bite and asked for seconds,” I murmured.

“I loved you then, Dallas. Maybe even before. I would eat crunchy enchiladas and soupy rice my entire life if it meant I got to do it with you. But I’m hoping you got a little better at it by now.” He chuckled, nipping at my neck. He pulled back again to make sure he had my attention as I looked at him in question. “You are a lot of sass and bite, Dallas and I love it. Maybe it’s the Spaniard in me. But what I love most is that heart you try so hard to hide. It’s so easy to see, and when you love, you love me so well.” He cupped my face in his hands as he spoke next. “Dallas, the greatest give you’ve ever given me was a piece of your heart. I’m going to have to ask for that back now. I need it.”

“You already have it,” I whispered pressing my lips against his.

“I know,” he whispered back.

“Dean?” I questioned, getting lost in his kiss.

“Quemi amor?”

“I’ve really been blind, but I think I always knew how much you loved me. It was so
hard
to be in love with the most beautiful and wanted man in school. I still can’t handle the way they look at you at work now. I know I haven’t been an easy woman to love, but you seemed like an
impossible
man to keep. I just never really believed you were really mine. You were always so much larger than life. I always felt like I wasn’t enough.”

“I’ll never give you a reason to worry about that, Dallas. You place too much importance on that stuff, and I never have. You forget how beautiful you are and how much I want you.” He lifted my chin. “The best I have ever felt in my life is when I lose myself in my love for you. No other woman can compare with that. And then there’s always the fact that I’m going to marry you.”

I smiled broadly. “Well, I mean, it is a consensual thing. You may want to ask first,” I said, lifting a brow.

“I can be very persuasive, baby.” He ground his hips into mine, his length hardening again. “Tell me what you want now, and let me give it to you.”

“Being a doctor wasn’t the only dream I’ve ever had.”

“I know.”

“It’s so simple, isn’t it? Just to be with you, be yours. How the hell did we screw this up so badly?”

“We fell in love at an age when I couldn't act on it. And then...we fell deeper in love at an age when we were only meant to cross paths. It wasn't really our fault. It was the workings of fate.”

“And now?”

He smiled broadly. “I made fate my enemy and took matters into my own hands.”

“Way to go, Martin.”

He stood up with us still connected and his pants at his ankles then awkwardly carried us up the stairs. I heard my phone vibrate in my purse and made him stop.

“Come on, it’s Christmas Eve,” he started to fuss, but I silenced him.

“Beatrice,” I reminded him. He quickly conceded, but refused to take himself out of me. I laughed as he made his way back down the steps, tightening his hold on me as he grabbed my purse and then made his way back up the stairs. I was laughing hysterically as he mummied his way to his room, victory in his face when we landed on the bed, and he thrust deep inside me. I relished in the feel of him as I heard my phone again.

I lifted it out of my purse to glance at it as he cupped my breast and lifted his eyebrow. I shook my head to discourage him. He reluctantly pulled out of me and I sat up quickly, noticing the number of missed calls.

“Oh God, I have ten missed calls from my mother!” I pressed redial and held my breath. My father was all I could think of.

Please, God, don’t let anything be wrong with my father.

“Dallas,” my mother sobbed into the phone.

“Mom,” I said, terrified as Dean leaned in and rubbed his hand down my back, straining to hear.

“Dallas, I’m at the hospital. You need to come right now.”

“Mom, what is it?”

“It’s Grant. Dallas, he’s been in a terrible accident.” Dread coursed through me, and though I knew the answer to the question, I had to ask. Before I could get the words out, she answered me.

“He’s gone.”