The Fairy-Tale Detectives (The Sisters Grimm, Book 1) (18 page)

"Listen, you little brat, I'm the only hope you've got," Jack replied. "Two little girls and a garden gnome aren't going to stop a giant."

"Who are you calling a garden gnome?" Puck said, pulling his flute from his sweatshirt. "My royal army knows how to deal with insolent peasants."

"Boys!" Sabrina and Daphne cried in unison. "That's enough!"

Puck and Jack backed off. The girls looked at each other. Apparently, there was a bit of Granny in them both.

"What happened to Hamstead and his deputies?" Sabrina asked.

"Charming came by and picked them up," Puck said, staring a hole into Jack. "I sat up on the roof and watched him scream at them for half an hour. It was hilarious."

"Good, we could use a break," Sabrina said, turning and opening the front door.

Elvis rushed past her and into the kitchen, returning a moment later with Granny Relda's handbag. He dropped it at the girls' feet and began to snarl at it. The girls ignored him. Daphne headed into the living room, set the carpet tenderly on the floor, and plopped down, exhausted, into a chair. She pulled a book out from underneath the cushion she was sitting on and tossed it aside.

"So, this is the famous Grimm house," Jack said as he wandered from room to room, lifting up photographs and snooping around. "Oh, I wish I had my camera with me. No one will believe I was actually inside."

"Make yourself at home, please," Sabrina said. If Jack heard the sarcasm in her voice, he pretended not to and continued his snooping.

"So girls, where can I take a kip?" he asked.

Daphne looked at Sabrina for a definition but Sabrina shook her head.

"I have no idea what that means."

"You know, hit the sack?" Jack said.

"You want to go take a nap?"

"I'm zonked."

"We didn't break you out of jail so you could camp out in our house."

"Kids, I was on a lumpy jail cot all night. I need to get some rest, and besides, my big plan can't go into effect until tomorrow night, anyway."

"What big plan?"

"Right now, it's best that we don't discuss it." Jack fell onto the couch and stretched his arms behind his head.

"He doesn't have a plan!" Puck snapped.

"Yes, I do!" Jack replied. "We'll talk about it later. I just need a couple of hours of shut-eye." He closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep.

Puck looked at the girls, turned, and stomped outside, slamming the door behind him.

"What do we do now?" Daphne said sleepily.

"I suppose we might as well get some rest, too," Sabrina said, seeing her sister's head bob. She scooped her grandmother's handbag off the floor and set it on the table, then gently urged Daphne out of her chair. Elvis whined at the girls.

Sabrina turned and whispered into the dog's ear, "Elvis, keep an eye on Jack."

The dog's eyes reflected an understanding, and he seated himself like a stone guardian, watching the sleeping man. The two girls went up to their bedroom. It had been a long day.

•   •   •

Sabrina didn't remember falling asleep, but when she woke up she was still in her clothes and it was already nine o'clock in the morning. She crawled out of bed, leaving her snoring sister alone, and walked down the hallway. She heard a sound from Granny Relda's room and decided to investigate, but when she opened the door, no one was there.

She stepped inside and noticed a framed photo on the old woman's dresser. It was of Granny and Grandpa, hugging happily under an apple tree. As usual, Mr. Canis was standing nearby. His face seemed slightly out of focus and the camera flash had turned his eyes a bright blue color. Sabrina reached into her pocket and pulled out the photo she had found in Granny Relda's handbag. Comparing the two, she found the same odd effect over Mr. Canis. Sabrina was surprised she hadn't noticed it before.

"What are you doing in here?" Puck's voice asked. It startled Sabrina and she dropped both the picture and the framed photo to the ground. Luckily, the glass didn't break.

Sabrina looked around the room, searching for the boy, but didn't see him. "Where are you?"

"Up here, ugly," said Puck.

Sabrina looked up and nearly screamed. A housefly the size of Elvis was sitting upside down on the ceiling above her. But its enormous size wasn't nearly as disturbing as its human head, which had shaggy blond hair, a gold crown, and a mischievous grin. Apparently, Puck had a whole bag of disturbing tricks.

"What are you doing in here?" Sabrina demanded.

"Uh . . . it's the only quiet room in the house," Puck replied. "Besides, I know you and Jack have got your big plans. Wouldn't want to get in the way."

"Could you come down here?"

Puck suddenly morphed back into his human form and fell clumsily to the bed below.

"You're being a baby," Sabrina said. "Jack wants to help, and you can't stand not being the center of attention."

"Whatever," the boy replied. "But when he gets you into trouble, don't be angry when I remind you that I told you so."

"You got a better plan, then let's hear it, 'cause all I've heard from you is the never-ending buzz of your flapping lips," Sabrina snapped. "My parents ran out on me and Daphne almost two years ago. We've been through the ringer and have been bounced around for far too long. I admit, when we met Granny Relda I didn't want anything to do with her. But now that I know she's the real deal, I'm going to do whatever it takes to get her back. I've lost one family. I'm not losing another. So if you have a better idea, then I'm all ears!"

"Don't look at me," Puck said. "I've made no promises to the old lady. She knew I wasn't a good little boy when we met."

Sabrina was taken aback by his insensitivity. "So you couldn't care less what happens to her?"

"I've learned one thing in this life of mine. Look out for yourself. Everyone else will just end up disappointing you."

"So you won't help?"

"I'm not one of the good guys," Puck said.

Suddenly, the sound of Elvis's barking filled the room. Sabrina peered into the hallway. There, she saw Jack fighting with Elvis, who was shredding the man's pants in his angry teeth.

"Get this beast away from me! He's rabid," Jack begged.

"What are you doing up here?" Sabrina asked, suspiciously.

"I was coming up to wake you."

Daphne entered the hallway rubbing sleep from her eyes.

"What's going on?"

"The Giant Killer is prowling around the house looking for something to steal," Puck said. "Your savior has sticky fingers."

"Shut your mouth, you dirty little hooligan," Jack shouted.

"It'll take more than your words to make that happen, you thieving barn rat."

"Elvis," Daphne said as she patted the angry dog on the head—her touch seemed to have a calming effect on him— "take a chill pill."

Elvis released Jack's pant leg from his teeth.

"Thank you," Jack said, eyeing his mangled trousers. "So, are you ready to hear my plan?"

Sabrina looked at Puck, hoping the boy might reconsider and help them, but he sneered and looked away.

"Yes, we're ready," she replied.

Puck said nothing. He walked down the stairs and out the door, slamming it behind him.

"We don't need him, anyway," Jack said. "Is anyone hungry? Let's have some breakfast!"

He rushed down the stairs and into the kitchen, the girls following behind. They watched as he rifled through the contents of the refrigerator.

"There's nothing to eat in this house," Jack complained. "I could really go for some bubble and squeak or some bangers. Do you kids think you could cook up some steak-and-kidney pie for me?"

The girls stared.

"I hear noises coming from his mouth but they don't sound like words," Daphne said.

"Maybe he's having some kind of fit," Sabrina said.

Jack rolled his eyes, snatched up some leftovers, and ate greedily.

"Let me tell you kids," he said, his mouth full, "prison food is terrible."

"We'll take your word for it," Sabrina said.

While Jack ate, the girls took turns telling him how Granny Relda and Mr. Canis had been kidnapped. Sabrina told him her theory about Mayor Charming being the mysterious Mr. Englishman, and how she thought he was using the giant to scare people off their land.

"So, tell us your plan," Daphne said as Jack finished his breakfast.

"I'm still working out the details."

Both the girls flashed Jack an angry look.

"Don't worry!" he said defensively. "It's going to be brilliant."

Sabrina had had enough. She got up from her seat and grabbed the telephone.

"We helped you escape from prison so you could help us save our grandmother and all you have done is eat our food and drool on our sofa," she raged. "If you can't do it, then I'm just going to call Deputy Crane and let him know you're ready to go back."

"Put the phone down and relax," Jack said calmly as he helped himself to another chicken leg. "You think tracking down a giant is easy? Giants have survived thousands of years being as big as they are and they've learned a few things about staying out of sight when they need to. Now we can traipse through the woods, cut down the forest, and drag the Hudson River, but the fact is that if a giant doesn't want to be found, he's not going to be found."

"You're talking in circles," Sabrina complained.

"What I'm saying, duck, is that we have to be smarter than a giant to catch a giant. You said it yourself, that the mayor was trying to cover up what happened to that farm. It's no secret he wants to buy up the entire town. What better way than to get a giant to scare off the landowners who won't sell? So when your family started snooping around, he sent the big boy after you. He's got your granny and now he's after the two of you. All the evidence you need was chasing us down

yesterday."

"Go on," Sabrina said, as she set the phone back in its cradle.

"Knowing Charming, he's got a map of Ferryport Landing in his office, with all the property he's after and where he's going to send the giant next. All you have to do is sneak into his office during the ball tonight, find the map, and see where the giant's next target is. Then we show up, the giant shows up, I do what I do, and bingo-bango, we kill the big boy and save your grandmum."

"That's your big plan?" Sabrina cried.

"You got something better? I know that sneaking into the ball doesn't sound as exciting as burning down the forest and waiting for the giant to run out, but I've always had a mind that tells me the easiest way is the best way."

"There's one big problem, though," Daphne spoke up. "The mayor and the police are looking for us. We're going to have a tough time sneaking into the place."

"Oh, girls, you're going to go right through the front door and no one is even going to notice," Jack said confidently.

After he had eaten, he insisted the best way to digest a meal was to follow it with another kip. As their "hero" rested, the girls frantically searched the books for anything that might help. Eventually, they came upon one of their grandfather Basil's many journals. Inside, he had sketched out a rough plan of Charming's estate.

The mayor's mansion was a sprawling several-story palace with dozens of rooms. Their grandpa had given estimates of room sizes, locations of various windows, and even an indication of a wall he believed held a secret door. But Grandpa hadn't seen all of the house, and many parts of the drawing were labeled with question marks. Sabrina noticed he had paid extra attention to possible escape routes—apparently, Grandpa had been a bit of a sneak as well.

Sabrina carefully studied the map and did her best to commit it to memory. When Jack finally woke up, several hours later, he found the girls ready to get started.

"The first thing we need is the magic mirror," Jack said.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Sabrina said, stealing a look into Daphne's eyes.

"Girls, I know Relda has the magic mirror. Everyone knows that. Why do you think the front door has a dozen locks on it?"

Sabrina took the keys out of her pocket and led her sister and their guest up the steps. Once they arrived at the mirror's room, she inserted the key and unlocked the door. As before, the face in the mirror was filled with rage at the invasion.

"WHO DARES?"
he bellowed.

Jack strolled in without a care, followed by the girls.

"Turn off the drama, Mirror," he scoffed.

"Oh, it's you," Mirror mumbled.

"Of course it's me. I'm the bloke you call when you have a big problem, and these girls have a really big problem," Jack bragged.

"And where is the carpet?" the face in the mirror asked Sabrina.

"Sorry," she said. She walked to the doorway and called for it. After a couple of minutes, the carpet floated limply into the room.

"What have you done to it?" Mirror cried as the carpet fell to the floor and once again rolled itself up.

"I think we had too many people on it," Daphne explained as a hand broke the surface of the mirror and snatched the carpet from the ground.

"It's nearly unraveling in my hand," the face wailed as he babied the rug. "Poor little carpet, look at how they treated you."

"Too many years hanging on a wall in the Grimm house have made you a real sourpuss," Jack commented.

"How can I help you?" Mirror asked, brushing off the insult.

"We need to sneak into Charming's mansion tonight and we need some disguises," Jack said.

"Not a problem at all."

"And we need the slippers."

Mirror frowned. "Absolutely not," he stammered.

"Listen, this house is going to be surrounded with the police any minute now. Ali Baba's carpet isn't going to get us into Charming's mansion. We need the slippers," Jack argued.

"Mrs. Grimm would not approve. The slippers were entrusted to this family so they would never fall into the wrong hands," Mirror replied.

"You can trust me," said Jack.

"Didn't you used to have your own magic items? What happened to the Cloak of Darkness?"

"I lost it in a game of poker."