The End Of Desire: A Rowan Gant Investigation (28 page)

“The grackle?”

“No. Lewis. ‘mat.’”

I thought about her comment for a few seconds
then said, “I’d still have to say shock. After what happened
yesterday you were angry. I wouldn’t be surprised if you haven’t
let go of that yet, even if you think you have. Your mind is
probably dealing with all of this by rationalizing what happened to
him as some form of cosmic justice.”

“You sound like Helen.”

“Yeah,” I admitted. “I guess I do. Sorry
about that.”

“Don’t be. Maybe you’re right. At least, I
hope you are. I don’t like feeling this way. It’s not like me at
all.”

“No, it isn’t. But, I can certainly
understand it. You’ve been through way too much this past couple of
months. You’ve been overloaded with a whole spectrum of emotions,
and something eventually has to give. Sometimes our brains just
have to take a breather, and that tends to make our psyche’s go a
little off kilter.”

“Is this how you feel? I mean, when you’ve
finally had all you can take?”

“We all feel things differently,
Felicity.”

“So, that’s a no?”

“It’s a
we all
feel things differently
.”

“Aye, I thought so.”

She turned back to face the yard. I stood
there wondering if I should have simply said yes to the original
question in order to help her reconcile what she was going through.
Of course, hindsight is twenty-twenty, but at the moment even that
seemed more than just a bit myopic.

I looked over my shoulder and glanced through
the kitchen window but saw no activity at all. I had to assume Ben
and the tech were out inspecting the yard as I had suggested.

Turning back to Felicity I said, “Looks safe
in there now. Want to go in?”

“Not just yet.”

“Do you want me to leave you alone?”

She shook her head. “No.”

I waited a moment, listening to the rise and
fall of the wind as it hissed through the bare branches of the
trees.

“So, Ben is insisting we come stay at his
place until this blows over,” I finally said. “I think that might
be a good idea.”

“We can’t leave the animals,” she said.
“We’ve done that too much lately. They’re already traumatized
enough.”

“We’ll get RJ to take them.”

“RJ is out of town.”

“Then Joe and Terri. We’ll find
somebody.”

“That isn’t the point.”

“I know it isn’t, sweetheart, but she knows
where we live. It isn’t safe here.”

“There’s magick involved, Rowan. Will it
really be any safer elsewhere?”

“I don’t know,” I admitted. “But, we can at
least stack some of the odds in our favor.”

“We could just ward the house again.”

“Wards stop magick. They don’t stop
people.”

“If we stay with him, we’ll just have to ward
there as well. What will he say when I start salting and smudging
his house?”

“Knowing him, probably something about
hocus-pocus and la-la land.”

She sighed heavily. “Aye, I suppose maybe
you’re right. Staying here would be too big a risk.”

I heard a knock behind me, and I turned to
see Ben standing at the back window of the kitchen, rapping his
knuckles on the glass. As soon as he had my attention, he waved me
in.

“It looks like Ben needs to talk to me,” I
told Felicity.

“Aye, I’m sure he needs to talk to me as
well.”

“I’m sure that can wait if you aren’t
ready.”

“No. I should get it over with.”

“Okay, if you’re sure.”

I ushered my wife in through the back door
ahead of me then followed her through the atrium and into the
kitchen. The warmth of the house made my cheeks tingle as the
circulation resumed in my face.

“Hey,” I said with a quick nod toward Ben.
“We were just talking about coming in to pack some bags.”

“Yeah, good idea,” he returned, a stoic
expression on his face.

“I suppose you need a statement from me?”
Felicity asked.

“Yeah,” he nodded. “But, why don’t ya’ get
started packin’. We can do that in a bit.”

“Aye, are you sure?”

“Yeah.” He nodded again.

“Thanks,” she replied.

We both started from the room, but Ben tapped
my arm as I passed. When I looked up at him, he jerked his head
toward the back of the kitchen.

“You go ahead, honey,” I told Felicity. “I’ll
be along in a minute.”

“Why? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. I just need to talk to Ben.”

She looked at us both then turned and
continued through the doorway without a word. When he decided she
was out of earshot, Ben raised an eyebrow.

“Not doin’ too good, is she?” he asked.

“She’s okay,” I told him. “Rattled, but
that’s understandable.”

“Want me ta’ call Helen and invite her over
for dinner so they can talk?”

“I doubt she’d want to come over for dinner
only to have to work, Ben. Besides, I’d rather not put any pressure
on Felicity. I think she might just need some time to get over the
shock.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah. For now anyway.”

“Okay,” he said, looking to the side then
smoothing back his hair. “So, you were right about the bones.
Didn’t take long ta’ find a coupl’a fragments. The tech is taping
off the front yard right now, and she just called in some support
ta’ do a full sweep.”

“I can’t say I’m surprised.”

“So, when we pick ‘em up, will that make the
curse go away?”

“Not really. For one thing it will be
impossible for you to get all of them.”

“It somethin’ that could kill ya’?”

“Probably not.”

“Prob’ly?”

“It’s magick, Ben,” I explained. “It isn’t
good, but it’s also something I can protect myself against.”

“Well, then I guess ya’ better do some of
your hocus-pocus then.”

“Trust me, I will. And, Felicity already has
hocus-pocus planned for your house.”

“Friggin’ lovely. So, how’s your head? You’re
sure you ain’t gonna kick off all of a sudden or somethin’,
right?”

“It hurts, and I seriously doubt it.”

“Okay, just checkin’. So, anyway, listen… Do
cloves mean anything?”

“Why? Did you find cloves out there too?”

“No. Got a call from Martin. Apparently,
Devereaux didn’t do any of the regular Voodoo shit we’ve found in
the past. Nothin’ obvious anyway. But, there was a big ass
container of cloves spilled all over the kitchen counter.”

“Hmmm… Clove oil is used in love and lust
spells. Are you sure it just wasn’t some sort of accident in the
kitchen?”

“Well, there’s a pile of wax too. Looks like
what’s left of a red candle accordin’ ta’ Martin. They also found a
dish with what appears ta’ be blood in it. He figured I should run
it past ya’ since I was here.”

“Okay, if you throw in the candle and the
blood, I’d have to say it sounds like some kind of magick, or at
least an attempt at it,” I replied. “But I’m not sure exactly
what.”

“Okay. Just thought I’d check…” He sighed
then shook his head. “So, if ya’ saw it ya’ think ya’ might be able
ta’ tell?”

“Maybe. It’s hard to say.”

“What if you were in the same room with
it?”

“The odds would be better,” I replied. “Ben,
are you asking me what I think you are?”

“Look, I know ya’ quit and all, but yeah, I’m
askin’. You wanna come with me to the scene?”

“Why?”

“Ta’ see if all that is somethin’ ya’ need
ta’ worry about.”

“I’m not really comfortable with leaving
Felicity right now. I think it would be…”

“I’ll go,” Felicity’s voice cut me off from
the doorway.

Ben and I both turned to look in her
direction. I had no idea how long she had been standing there, but
it was obviously long enough to know what I was objecting to.

“I don’t think that’s such a good idea,” I
told her.

“Why?”

“I think that’s pretty obvious.”

“I gotta agree with Row on this one,” Ben
added. “Besides, given your history with this guy, your name on the
scene log ain’t gonna fly.”

“One of us needs to go,” she replied. “You
can’t effectively counter a spell without knowing what it is to
begin with.”

“You can just ward against magick, Felicity.
You know that.”

“Aye, well maybe I’m tired of hiding,” she
shot back. “It hasn’t done me any good so far.”

Ben looked at me and said with a shrug, “Your
call, White Man.”

I glanced back to my wife. Her expression
hadn’t changed and neither had the look of determination in her
eyes.

“If I can’t go, then you have to,” she
said.

“What about the whole thing with me being
banned from the investigation?” I said, looking over to Ben.

“Fuck it.”

“You could get into trouble taking me into a
scene.”

“Yeah, so?”

“I’m not good with that.”

“You don’t hafta be.”

“Yes, I do.”

“Listen, this ain’t about the investigation.
This is personal. If this bitch is throwin’ somethin’ down on you,
then ya’ need ta’ know what it is.”

“It might not have anything to do with us at
all.”

“You really believe that?”

I didn’t reply.

“Uh-huh,” he grunted, adding a slow nod as
well. “Thought as much.”

“You actually sound like you’re starting to
believe in magick.”

“Right now I believe in makin’ sure you two
are safe. If this weird ass shit poses a threat, then ya’ need to
know about it.”

“So what could happen to you if I go?”

“That ain’t for you to worry about.”

“I’m going to anyway.”

“Yeah, so now ya’ know how I feel.”

“Well, like I was saying earlier, I’m not
comfortable with leaving Felicity here by herself. Not after this
morning.”

“Not an issue anyway,” Ben offered. “I
already called for a unit from the locals to come over an watch the
house. They’ll be here before the crime scene unit even thinks
about clearin’ out.”

“Aye, I’ll be fine,” she interjected. “I’ll
lock the door and finish packing while you’re gone.”

All of my objections had been met head on,
and I really couldn’t think of any more. Of course, even if I did I
suspected Ben would have an answer for them as well.

Reluctantly, I gave in. “Okay, I guess I’ll
go.”

N
ews crews were already on
site, their vans positioned across the street while reporters
performed for the cameras using the activity surrounding the
apartment complex as a lurid backdrop. As usual, Ben muttered an
expletive or two about them as he hooked his van into the parking
lot then nosed it into an empty space. Before climbing out of the
vehicle, he slipped his badge onto a cord then hung it around his
neck.

When we arrived at the fluttering line of
yellow tape, my friend flashed the shield to the officer standing
watch at the building entrance then signed in on the crime scene
log. He stood by patiently waiting while I added my name to the
list.

“Can I see your ID, sir?” the officer asked
as I handed the pen back to him.

“He’s with me,” Ben answered before I could
reply.

The officer glanced at my name on the
clipboard, back at Ben, then to me. “Which department are you
with?”

“He’s an independent consultant,” Ben
replied, once again not giving me a chance to speak. “Like I said,
he’s with me.”

The man cocked an eyebrow and stared at him
for a moment then pointed toward the building. “One-oh-three. Down
the stairs, second door on the right. Can’t miss it.”

Inside the door, we both donned latex gloves
and paper shoe covers before continuing down the short flight of
stairs then along the hallway toward the entrance to the apartment.
My mind was already starting to race before we had ever entered the
building, and upon reaching 103, it was setting new speed records.
Ben started through the door, but I visibly hesitated before
stepping across the threshold.

The scent of cloves wafted out of the
apartment carried along on the unmistakable metallic funk of blood
and fresh death. The bizarre mélange of smells made the ache in my
head automatically shift into a higher gear.

The last time I had entered a crime scene
where Annalise and Miranda had played their deadly games, I had
walked into far more than I was prepared to handle. Granted, I had
been alone and too exhausted to properly shield myself from the
onslaught, but the memory of that incident was still fresh. Too
fresh, in fact, for something that was now over two weeks old.

“You okay?” Ben asked as he stepped back out
into the hallway. “I turned around and you were gone. You ain’t
goin’ la-la are ya’?”

“No…” I replied. “I’m just a bit… anxious… I
guess.”

“I told ya’ not ta’ worry about that,” he
said. “I’ll deal with it.”

I shook my head. “It’s not that. It’s more
like bad memories.”

“You wanna take a pass?” he asked. “You can
wait in the van if ya’ want.”

“No. I’m already here. I might as well have a
look.”

“Long as you’re sure. I mean, I want ya’ ta’
take a look at this whole candle thing, that’s the whole point.
But, I also don’t wanna push ya’ over the edge either.”

My head was pounding at this point, but I
couldn’t be sure if it was a product of what waited on the other
side of the doorway, or if it was entirely due to this attack of
anxiety. I closed my eyes for a moment then drew in a deep
breath.

“It’s okay,” I finally said. “Let’s go on
in.”

Ben watched me carefully for a moment then
offered a guarded “okay.”

I followed him into the apartment, fully
expecting to be set upon by latent feelings of arousal mixed with
fear, just as I had been before. Instead, I was slapped full in the
face by the psychic residue of blind anger. I felt my face flush as
the emotion corkscrewed its way into my head, coursing out through
my body and making my skin prickle with a sudden wave of
gooseflesh.