The Doll's House (40 page)

‘Let me spell it out for you, Clodagh, since we’re getting on so well together.’

I’m silent, hoping he will keep talking.

‘After the baby died, your mother had no choice but to come to me. She knew I had the connections to get it hushed up, brushed under the carpet as another mysterious cot death. No great issue there. These things happen all the time. All you need is some medical expertise. That, like everything else in life, can be bought.’

‘Go on.’ My voice is crackly, unsure.

‘Afterwards I figured it would be a matter of time before your mother dumped your father, leaving the way open for me. But that wasn’t her style. She liked to keep up appearances, no matter what. She
had no intention of leaving your father, or their sham of a marriage.’ I can hear the hate rising in his voice. ‘I’m a man who expects to get what he wants.’

‘She didn’t love you,’ I say quietly. He doesn’t hear me, hell bent on continuing with his rant.

‘I like to control outcomes, Clodagh. With control you gain success. I needed to adjust my tactics. Apply more pressure on the weakest link, convince your father that he couldn’t live with himself after what he’d done. He didn’t need much persuasion. Alcohol can deepen the darkest mood, don’t you agree, Clodagh?’

I remain silent.

‘Of course, everyone thought it was the collapse of the business, that and the rumours of his wife’s infidelity. Either way, it didn’t matter. He was out of the picture. I waited, knowing financial pressure and the prospect of raising two children alone would be difficult for your mother.’

‘And then what?’

He smirks. ‘I underestimated her or, rather, I underestimated how abhorrent I was to her. It’s a strong word, “abhorrent”.’

‘I guess so.’

‘That’s what she said to me. That she found me abhorrent. She didn’t want me or my money. After all I’d done for her. Can you believe that?’

‘Things are often said in the heat of the moment. Things we don’t always mean.’ I can’t believe I’m speaking to him like this, pretending everything is okay.

‘Perhaps you’re right. She was ill, I became aware of that. Postnatal depression in your mother’s case was severe.’

‘I can’t imagine what it must have been like for her.’ Again Alister seems to ignore me.

‘You are quite beautiful.’ Once more he runs his fingers through my hair, and I want to scream. He pulls them away swiftly. ‘It seems, Clodagh, that I was both abhorrent and foolish. Maybe it was because
I knew how sick she was, but in the end I gave in. I arranged for that idiot Jenkins to convince her to take the money, to say it was from him. Her knight in bloody shining armour …’ his voice is filled with hate again ‘… with money I gave him. She took it then, of course, even though she wanted nothing more to do with him either.’ His voice changes, sounding sarcastic. ‘She wanted to look after her darling children, yourself and Dominic. Start afresh.’

‘And you simply walked away?’

‘At the time, I had no other choice. The money was nothing, a drop in the ocean. Maybe I thought time would change things. I don’t know. As the years went by, I let it go. But then I met Ruby and was drawn back to my own ghosts.’

I cringe at hearing Ruby’s name coming from his mouth. ‘You can let the past go, you know,’ I say. ‘It’s not always good to look back.’

‘From you, Clodagh, that’s a little trite. Isn’t that what the hypnosis is about? Looking back, trying to find the truth?’

‘How do you know about that?’

‘The same way I know most things. A friend helped me out.’

‘Well, the truth isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.’ It’s my turn for anger to bubble over. ‘What friend?’

He laughs. ‘It doesn’t matter. Not now. Perhaps, Clodagh, I chose the wrong Hamilton to fall for. Do you believe in karma?’

‘Not particularly.’

‘Well, neither did I, until I met your mother again. You see, Clodagh, sometimes what goes around comes around, and all that.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘I told you, I’m a man who expects to get what he wants.’

‘So?’

‘Some things had started to get tricky over the last year. My reputation, my territory were being threatened. When that happens, I have to go on the attack.’

None of this is making any sense to me. ‘I still don’t understand.’

‘Your father’s bankrupt company, the one Jenkins used a fistful
of my money to take off your mother’s hands, started to get messy. Maybe it was jinxed all along.’ Again he looks to the door. ‘You see, Clodagh, the lovely Keith Jenkins got greedy. He decided to get some heavy hitters to invest in the company again. Do a bit of money-laundering. Turn dirty money all nice and clean. Sooner or later the trail would have led back to me, and I couldn’t have that.’

‘So you figured it was time to get rid of him?’ Again I wonder at the madness of my question.

‘Dead men don’t talk, Clodagh.’

‘But what has that to do with me?’

‘Karma.’ He smiles. ‘What goes around comes around.’ He stops talking, as if again he’s wondering should he share something. It doesn’t take him long to make up his mind. ‘When I went to see your mother, Clodagh, I realised it was payback time.’

Lynch’s call from outside the McKay house came shortly before four o’clock. ‘Sir, we have the car.’

‘What have you got exactly?’ O’Connor’s question sounded both strained and impatient.

‘Hanley and the crew are here.’ O’Connor was finding it hard to hear, with the external noise coming over the line from the street. ‘I’ve secured the area.’

‘You haven’t told me what you have.’

‘Enough blood deposits in the car to keep the techies busy for some time.’

‘Good. Are there any photos of Martin McKay in that house?’

‘There’s one with his daughter.’

‘Get the clearest you can find. Contact Matthews and have him alert all transport links in case this guy does a runner.’

‘Will do.’

‘I’m going to set up checkpoints, using the triangle of the McKay, Hamilton and old Hamilton houses. I expect to hear back from the recon crew at the strand shortly. Shit, I have a call coming in from Robinson. I’ll phone you back.’

‘Okay.’

‘Lynch, before you go, I want nothing left unturned in the McKay house.’ He hung up to take Robinson’s call.

‘I hope you and your guys doing the house-to-house haven’t been spending your time sightseeing on the strand.’

‘We have something for you.’

‘What?’

‘One of the elderly neighbours said she noticed lights going on and off in the old house at odd hours of the night and morning. Her husband spoke to Dominic Hamilton about it.’

‘And what did he say?’

‘Not a lot. He told the neighbour not to worry about it, but that’s not all.’

‘What else?’

‘A few others saw a Volvo recently in the vicinity. One of them reckons it belonged to the McKays.’

‘I’ve just had Lynch on the phone. The car is connected all right, enough blood deposits to keep them plenty busy. Hanley’s working on it now. Listen, Robinson, good work. By the way, I’ve sent a recon down there.’

‘We’ve already crossed paths.’

‘Hopefully we can piece together enough to get a warrant issued on the house. Will you fill Matthews in on what we have?’

‘Sure.’

‘I’ve got to go. I have a call coming in from Kate Pearson. Talk later.’

He took Kate’s call. ‘Talk fast, unless that guy’s crystal ball has worked.’

‘I’ll talk as fast as I can.’ Kate hated O’Connor giving her short shrift, but this wasn’t the time for side issues. ‘Clodagh McKay has done a number of regression sessions. She seems to have memory gaps from childhood, most probably related to some form of trauma. It ties in with her father’s death, but I think there’s something else.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘It was more in what Gerard Hayden didn’t say than what he did. The regression sessions were difficult. Sometimes these things can recover memory in a very disjointed way. If you throw in possible psychotic behaviour on the part of her brother, there’s a troubled family history, nothing surer.’

‘Anything else?’

‘It struck me when I was talking to Gerard Hayden that he might be the only person Clodagh McKay has openly talked to lately. She spoke about being afraid the last time she visited the old family home in Sandymount. When I asked Gerard where he thought she might be, the old house on the strand came up again. The house is some form of common denominator.’

‘You must have used that fella’s crystal ball. I have reconnissance in place at seventy-four Strand Road. Depending on what the guys get in, I’m hoping for a warrant on the house. It looks like we have the car, by the way. Lynch rang in from the McKays’ house a couple of minutes ago. Did that fortune-teller tell you anything else?’

‘He’s a hypnotist, O’Connor.’

‘Whatever.’

‘He didn’t give a lot away, but it looks like neither of the siblings is handling the mother’s death well. And, according to Valerie Hamilton, Clodagh’s relationship with her mother was strained.’

‘So both siblings were under a lot of stress?’

‘Yes, but according to Gerard Hayden, although Clodagh experienced a high level of emotional turmoil during the regression, she is mentally quite strong.’

‘Right. Kate, I don’t mean to rush you but I have to go.’

‘Okay. Let me know how it goes with the house on the strand. The roots of most adult problems begin in childhood. The old house as a tie-in could be exactly the place to look.’

‘Talk soon.’

‘Take it easy, O’Connor.’

‘Will do.’

‘What do you mean payback time?’ The wall behind me creaks. I look up at the old dartboard with the rusty darts still
in situ.
I think about getting them without Becon seeing me.

‘Jimmy Gahan – you do remember him, Clodagh?’

‘Yes. What about him?’

‘Like Jenkins, he knew too much. Jimmy was always one to have some scheme or another on the go. Unfortunately, Clodagh, the friends you make in younger life tend to hang around for a long time. If either Gahan or Jenkins had started to open their big mouths under pressure, with questions about me and my success, especially my connection with Hamilton Holdings, they wouldn’t have been questions I would have wanted answered. That couldn’t be allowed to happen. I’ve worked hard to keep my reputation clean. I wasn’t going to risk it now, not because of some sloppy business deals done by bloody Keith Jenkins.’

‘I still don’t see what this has to do with me.’

‘The truth, the twisted truth, is that nothing ever happens in isolation, Clodagh.’ He takes a deep breath. ‘Shortly after I called to see your mother, I realised she hadn’t told either you or Dominic the whole truth. She’d allowed both of you to believe your father’s death was an accident, not suicide.’ His voice starts to rise again, the bitterness returning. ‘She didn’t want to tell you he took his own life, that he hadn’t given a damn about any of you.’

‘What difference did it make to you? You said yourself you helped persuade him.’ I want to pull this man’s eyes out. ‘You always knew it was suicide, you encouraged it.’

He turns away again, looking to the door once more. It’s then I hear the sounds downstairs. Someone is moving around. I wonder about shouting, but think the better of it. For as Alister Becon looks from the attic door to me and then back again, he calls a name, one I don’t want to hear.

‘Martin, is that you?’ And another part of me dies inside.

The knife in my hand feels like an extension of me, cold, sharp and capable of great harm.

It’s the strangest thing waiting for something to happen for a long time. When the moment finally arrives, it feels almost imagined. As if thinking about it over time has made its reality strangely unbelievable.

I don’t answer Alister when he calls – at least, not at first. Let him sweat. I enjoy the thought of keeping him on his toes, even if he doesn’t realise it yet.

Clodagh is with him. She was completely out of it before I left. I gave Alister plenty of time to arrive, for the two of them to get acquainted. Alister, the master planner: his arrogance will be his ultimate downfall.

I wonder what version of the truth he has shared with her. It won’t take a lot to bring him down. He doesn’t have the strength he used to have. And then it will be Clodagh and me – exactly as it should be.

It’s been difficult. There’s no denying that. Knowing I’m near the end of this whole bloody thing offers some relief. There can be no backing away now. The pathway is clear, although the end game was never in doubt. Alister might have had other ideas. He hadn’t been happy when I dragged my heels with things. All the time I spent following Jenkins and Gahan around, getting to know their latest dirty little secrets. I enjoyed setting one up against the other, a rare pleasure in the shitstorm of events. Playtime before getting rid of them. And now it’s Alister’s turn. He’ll be surprised, taking me for a fool along the way, his pawn to be manipulated – exactly what I wanted him to believe.

He calls again. I ignore him. He’s so used to getting other people to do his dirty work that he still sounds smug – but not for long.

The stairs creak under my feet, my hand sliding up the banister. The closer I get to the top, the more assured I feel. I’ll need to be fast, take him unawares. And then he, too, can feel his lungs fill with water, the survival instinct kicking in, the will to live strong, but not strong enough to save him.

Deep inside me, I’d known Martin was a part of this. Maybe that’s what happens when your past is clouded in mystery: you live in a half-light, tinged with denial of the things you don’t want to admit.

Denial or not, neither Alister nor Martin has me here for any good reason. However I’m connected to this, there’s no easy way of getting back from this place.

Alister calls to Martin again, and when he does, so many questions flood into my head. Had my father felt betrayed by my mother? Did she make him feel a failure because of it? Why the hell did I stay with this man, other than for Ruby’s sake? Like one train wreck following another. For the briefest moment, I see my father trying to place his hand on my mother’s tummy. Her pushing him away, as if he must not touch the life inside her. I can forgive my father his rage, but I can’t forgive him choosing to die.
You deserted us too!
I scream inside.
What about me? What about Dominic?