The Diary of Bink Cummings: Vol 3 (MC Chronicles #3) (22 page)

Pixie stands close to me, biting her lip and waits for Axel. As soon as he shuts down his bike, he opens his arms wide, and she runs to him, throwing herself into his outstretched arms. Tripper and Dallas roll up beside each other and park. Reaching between their bikes, they pat one another on the shoulder, which speaks volumes about their brotherhood.

Unexpectedly, I am bumped from behind, and a muscled arm is thrown over my shoulder, a hand goes to my belly. I don’t even have to look to know who it is. It’s Gunz, showing me love and getting his grandpa time.

Keeping my eyes forward watching the gate, I anxiously wait for Big. He’s taking longer than I expected; everyone else is already here. Those with old ladies are all being welcomed home with affection. Dallas already has Debbie dipped over his bike, and he’s stripping off her shirt as we speak. There’s going to be another fuck show in the driveway very soon. Those brothers without old ladies are tiredly climbing off their Hogs and filing into the clubhouse.

Viper pecks my cheek on his way inside, “Good to see ya home.”

My brother Jizz caringly pats my shoulder before he strides into the clubhouse, looking haggard as hell. It’s gonna be quite the eventful evening. When the brothers return home, they always party. Tonight, after their run was cut short because of my crazy ass mother, they will be hitting the booze and pussy extra hard. Bet Gunz already put a call out to Niki, telling her to round up as much easy pussy as she can find.

Out of the corner of my eye, I watch my daddy dismount his bike and stride my way. He stops in front of me, forcing me to tear away from the empty front entrance and meet his matching blue eyes. Gunz takes a step back, releasing me and his grandbaby.

Daddy doesn’t speak when he crushes me to him, and I instinctively hug him back, turning my head and resting my cheek on his chest. “I’m so sorry,” he says thickly. “I shoulda known she’d do somethin’ stupid. I shoulda listened to Big.”

“Shoulda listened to Big?” I mutter to his chest, confused.

His hands rub up and down my back, in a calming motion. “He told me she would pull somethin’ like this. Told me he didn’t wanna go on the run so he could stay and protect ya. I told him he had to go ‘cause the other club needed to see his face, know who’s backin’ ‘em, and who they’re gettin’ into bed with. I coulda went on my own, but nobody’s that scared of me. Sometimes you just gotta bring in the big guns.”

I get what he’s saying. He needed the Prez. Not only ‘cause he’s the prez but because he’s a fucking six foot eight giant. Makes sense to me.

I nod my understanding to his chest as his hands find their way to the back of my head, combing through my hair.

Daddy holds me close for some time. I listen to his heart lub-lub in one ear and lack of Harley sounds with my other. Where in the fuck is Big? Why isn’t he here? Shouldn’t he have already rolled through the gate?

Unlatching from Daddy, I meet his eyes once more, “Where’s Big?” I chew my lip, knowing that his answer is not going to be one I want to hear.

Right in front of me, as if on cue, my daddy’s face changes from one of concern for his daughter to Steel just like his name. He’s hiding something. Something huge.

“Where’s Big, Daddy?” I repeat sternly.

“He went to take care of some business.” His face gives nothing away. It’s purely impassive. Showing no signs of what the hell Big is truly up to. I don’t know how he does it. How can he go from loving, caring father to hardened prick? It’s impressive on most occasions, but right now I’m annoyed as hell.

“Daddy,” I warn.

“Bink,” his tone deepens.

Gunz, who was never far away, presses his chest to my back and wraps his arms around me, both of his hands going to my belly, his chin to my shoulder. “Leave it be, Baby Doll,” he whispers to my ear. As if that’ll calm me down.

Clenching my fists at my sides, I shake my head defiantly. “I’m not calmin’ down. I asked a simple question. My old man is not home with his brothers, and I want to know where he is.” That’s it, I’ve lost my patience. My body hurts like a motherfucker, I was force-fed and pacified all day, and now Big’s not even home. I was anxious enough to see him anyhow, and now he’s god knows where doing god knows what. And my daddy isn’t going to tell me shit.

Where could he be? What could he be doing? I wonder, picking my own brain for some sort of inclination. Oh. Fuck. A wave of revelation washes through me. He’s not here, and everybody else is. There is only one thing he’d want to do on his own without any witnesses!

“Big’s dealing with my mother, isn’t he?” I fiercely question my daddy and cock my head to the side, assessing his steely face.

Daddy doesn’t respond. He steps forward, and kisses my forehead.

Oh hell no! He’s not going to answer me! Angrily, I reach out to grab his cut to make him talk to me. Only Gunz is quicker to deflect my outburst.

“Calm down,” Gunz says in my ear, gripping my wrists, holding them at my sides. I try to tug them out of his hold, but he doesn’t let go.
Motherfucker!

Daddy pays me one final glance and goes into the clubhouse. That asshole is going to pay! Big isn’t home, and nobody wants to tell me why. Not only does he have a secret old lady behind my back and I have a secret sister, he’s now withholding this information too. That asshole will be lucky if I ever speak to him after all of this is said and fucking done. Argghh! Why are men so frustrating?

Gunz releases my wrists and spins me around to face him. I frown, and he brings his forehead down to mine, as his hands cup the sides of my belly. “I’m tellin’ you this in confidence. We clear?” His serious eyes bore into mine.

“Yes.”

“Big called me this morning asking me to get the location of the cabin from Malcolm—”

“And?” I interrupt, impatient.

“And he said he was gonna run up there and take care of things.”

“What do you mean
take care
of things?” I emphasize.

“I didn’t ask, and I’m not going to,” he states just as Harley kicks. Gunz chuckles deeply at her batting his hands, and he smiles making the mature lines around his eyes crinkle. I reach up and cup the side of his handsome face and rub the lines with my finger. His head tilts to my touch, resting in my palm. The scruff of his rough cheek prickles my skin.

“What do you think he’ll do?” I query barely above a whisper. Milking information from Gunz is best served sweetly, not like a bitch, which in all honesty is exactly what I want to do. But I can’t.

He shrugs and smoothes his hands over the sides of my belly. “This little girl is all that matters,” he softly presses into my bump for emphasis.

“I know that, but I still wanna know what he is gonna do. I don’t want him out there alone.”

“I know that, and I already asked him if he wanted me to be there for backup. He don’t want that.” He’s firm. “Your mother has put that man through enough over the years. And that ain’t even includin’ the shit she’s done to you, which pisses him the fuck off. He’s doin’ whatever he feels is right, which none of us is gonna change. So you and I are better off not knowin’. It’ll make it easier for everybody to just move on, and trust me we ain’t ever gonna have to worry about seein’ that crazy bitch again,” Gunz explains.

“Daddy coulda just told me that,” I comment to myself and step back from Gunz, dropping my hand from his cheek. He stands up straight but keeps hold of my t-shirt clad belly. He’s obsessed with it, what can I say? A tried and true grandpa addict.

“Don’t you think he’s got enough to handle right now? He didn’t want Big stayin’ behind, then you get kidnapped. He’s gotta be feelin’ guilty ‘bout that. Considerin’ his ex-wife, your mother, was the problem. Steel don’t want you nowhere near that shit. I don’t either, but I knew if I didn’t tell ya, you were gonna end up with a burr up your ass. And we’re just happy to have you back.”

I know he’s right. I know my daddy probably does feel guilty. And I know for damn sure I would have a burr up my ass. I still do. Not going to admit that to anyone but you though. I was just preparing myself to see Big, and he’s not even here. I feel like all that mental preparation was for nothing. I was going to give him the cold shoulder, and then I was going to yell at him and tell him that he lied to me about my sister. Then I was going to, if I could reach them, kick him in the balls. I had it all played out in my head. Big rolls up wanting to hug me, and I let all my anger out. I need to let my anger out! I need someone to yell at. Someone to release all this internal bullshit on. He’s the only person I know who can handle my shit. The only fucking person who can listen to me yell and scream, and he’ll still want to look at me the next morning. The only fucking person on the planet who can handle my snarky mouth and emotional fits. He gets me.

Fuck! He was the man who a few weeks back sat and watched The Notebook with me, while I ate chocolate and screamed at Allie and Noah for waiting so long to be together. Stupid fucking Pixie suggested I watch the movie because I’d never seen it before. Had no clue what I was getting myself into until I started ugly crying a quarter of the way into the movie. Big didn’t even laugh. He just cuddled with me on our basement couch and let me yell at those idiots for wasting years of their lives without each other. After I got done watching that damn movie, I realized I was more upset by it because it somehow connected to me and Big’s relationship and us taking so many years to be together. So yeah… I might be pissed at him, I want to kill him, and I hate him for what he might have done on the run with some bitches in the bedroom and the blowjob before he left. But he’s my other half. The only person in the whole world who can handle all of this little crazy biker bitch and still love me in the end. Even if he is a controlling asshole of a bastard ninety percent of the damn time. He’s still my controlling asshole of a bastard, and that’s all that matters to me.

Shit…. I gotta stop thinking about him, or I am either going to end up hitting something or someone or flopping to the ground in a fit of tears. I can’t take this. None of it. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe my mother did get under my skin more than I thought. Oh well, nothing I can do about it now. Guess I’ll just have to wait for the big fucking Neanderthal to finally grace us with his presence before I’m finally able to let all of this, whatever it is boiling inside of me, go.

Laying my palms on top of both of Gunz’s hands, which rest on belly, I smile weakly at him. “Let’s go join the reunion,” I jerk my chin toward the clubhouse door.

“You sure?” he eyes me warily.

“Is Deke gonna be there?”

Gunz shakes his head, “Nope that brother needs a time out, and he’s been watchin’ the kids.”

“So he’s not allowed to come?”

This isn’t going to be good.

“Let me tell ya somethin’ about Deke,” Gunz reaches into his cut, pulls out two suckers, and hands one to me.

Graciously, I accept it and yank off the wrapper. Gunz steals the trash from my hand and shoves it into his jeans pocket. If he needs a sucker to talk about Deke, I know this isn’t going to be good. Think about it… Has anything been good today? I’d say no.

Gunz wraps his lips around his sucker for a moment before he continues, “That brother has a thing for ya, and that’s not cool. I knew that before he moved here. Figured you’d grown close since you worked for him. Now, though, it’s pissin’ me off. He knows his place but he don’t like the way Big acts around you—”

Yanking the sucker from my mouth, I cut him off. “How does he act?”

“Like he owns you.”

Like he owns me? What?!

Rolling my eyes, I shake my head and place my hand on my hip, “No he doesn’t. Big’s a lot of things and does a lot of shit I don’t like, but owning me isn’t one of ‘em. He’s overprotective and controlling sometimes, but he doesn’t own me.”

“I didn’t say he owns you, Baby Doll. I’m just sayin’ he acts like he does. We all know that. So does Deke. And Deke don’t like that. He think’s Big’s too controlling. We talked about it yesterday.”

“You talk to
who
about it yesterday?”

“Deke.”

“When did you speak to Deke?”

“When you were asleep.”

My hip cocks to the side, and my attitude flares. “So you’re tellin’ me after I fell asleep next to you last night you up and left to interrogate Deke?”

Gunz grins like he’s amused by me and shakes his head.
Fuckin’ men!

“No, I left to check on Malcolm, and Deke just so happened to be there. So I had a talk with him ‘bout you,” he clarifies, tone level.

“What kinda talk?”

“The kind that doesn’t end well if he doesn’t get his shit together.”

“So you threatened him!?” I snap, raising my voice a few octaves.

Gunz reaches out to me to calm me down, but I pull away. Nope, he’s not going to try to comfort me. That’s not going to work.

“Answer the question,” I demand, no nonsense.

“I didn’t threaten anybody. He knows the rules about old ladies. You’re off limits.”

How is Gunz being so calm about this? He’s not even riled up. And here I am standing in front of him, my hands are shaking and my body is tense. I feel like I could go four rounds in the ring. See, I told ya I needed an outlet. Big has gotta get home soon, or I am liable to explode.