The Devil’s Guide To Hollywood (61 page)

A powerful producer like my friend Robert Evans can change the course of history
.

E
vans told me this story: “I called Henry Kissinger and invited him to
The Godfather
premiere in 1972. I needed Henry there for the publicity. Henry said he couldn’t come—something about the war and the Paris peace talks and having to fly to Moscow the next morning. I reminded Henry how often he’d stayed in my guest house. I didn’t hear any more about the Paris peace talks. Henry didn’t fly to Moscow the next morning. He flew to
The Godfather
premiere.”

T
AKE IT FROM ZSA ZSA

Actress and famed Hungarian femme fatale Zsa Zsa Gabor: “I was in Boston, touring in
Blithe Spirit,
and Henry Kissinger made a date with me to fly down and take me out. But on opening night, he called and canceled. A trifle piqued, I asked why. And Henry gave me the reason—a reason that even I couldn’t quibble with: ‘I can’t fly down because we are invading Cambodia tomorrow. It is a big secret, you are the first person outside the White House who knows about it.’ ”

It’s all about whose is bigger
.

P
roducers have big egos.

The first time that producer Sam Spiegel met director David Lean’s girlfriend, he tried to seduce her.

ALL HAIL

Irwin Shaw!

The novelist and Sam Spiegel didn’t get along and Spiegel criticized Shaw’s work behind his back to other Hollywood producers—thereby stopping Shaw from getting screenwriting jobs.

To get even, Shaw began having an affair with Spiegel’s wife.

ALL HAIL

Irwin Shaw!

Sam Spiegel dumped the wife that Irwin Shaw had seduced and remarried.

And one day Irwin Shaw was having lunch with a mutual friend and the friend said that Sam Spiegel’s new wife was supposed to be “great in the feathers.”

So Irwin Shaw seduced Sam Spiegel’s new wife and began an affair with her.

ALL HAIL

Marion Shaw!

Shaw’s wife, Marion, found out about the affair and, at a dinner party, she stuck her foot out and tripped Spiegel’s wife, who broke her ankle.

ALL HAIL

Omar Sharif!

Sam Spiegel discovered Omar Sharif in obscure Egyptian films. He made him an international star.

In return, Sharif seduced Sam Spiegel’s wife and had an affair with her.

ALL HAIL

John Huston!

Angered that Sam Spiegel’s wife was flaunting jewels while he was broke,
African Queen
director John Huston began an affair with her.

“John was very cruel to her,” a friend said. “He really abused her.

Sam Spiegel’s was bigger than Mike Todd’s
.

S
am Spiegel took his new wife to the Lido in Venice. Producer Mike Todd went over to their table.

“Hey, angel face,” Todd said to Spiegel’s new wife. “Do you know where you were last year on this exact same date at this exact same time?” Sam Spiegel said to his new wife, “Never mind.”

But Mike Todd continued: “You were sitting right here, at this exact same table, with me, angel face.”

Don Simpson admired Sam Spiegel
.

D
on didn’t date; he fucked,” said a former assistant.

Simpson said, “When you meet a lady and she says, ‘Would you like to make love?’ well, the first thing I like to do is fuck, not make love.”

Because they’re all empowered
…

S
creenwriter Nick Kazan: “Why is it that, in Hollywood, every producer, studio executive, and development person just out of college feels entitled to make suggestions on every script they receive? How can they be so confident of their opinions? Are they truly unaware of the damage they can do?”