The Desires of a Countess (9 page)

“
Well, my lady, I don’t know
if I would say-”

Simon sprang forward to place a hard
hand on Adam’s forearm. “Adam doesn’t like to brag, but he does
enjoy swinging a mallet, don’t you?” He squeezed his friend’s arm
until Adam yanked it away with a glare that told Simon he wouldn’t
mind swinging a mallet at his head.

“
Yes, Lady
Westdale.”

“
We must play before you and
Mr. Webber depart.”

Again, she bestowed a friendly smile
on his first mate that made Simon shiver. Good God, she was
beautiful when she didn’t try to be so damned reserved. If only he
could make her look at him that way.

Which was, of course, the most
ridiculous notion he’d ever had.

“
Well, I should be off to
oversee these lads while they haul away some of this rotted wood.
Good day, my lady.” Adam gave Ginny a bow and Simon another glare
before he strolled back into the yard and left the two of them
alone.

***

Ginny watched the older man depart
down the path with a shiver of trepidation. Suddenly being alone
with Simon didn’t seem like such a good idea. Especially when he
was standing there with his shirt undone, his muscles rippling and
just the lightest sheen from exertion on his skin. The sight of him
made her oddly hot and dizzy.

“
Your friend seems like a
good man,” she said, while she prayed Simon would behave decently
and button his shirt. Then she might have some hope of regaining
her concentration.

Instead, Simon only nodded. “Yes, he
is. No man could find a more loyal friend.”

She nodded absently, but remained
disturbingly focused on his half-exposed body. Damn him for using
his looks against her. But she damned herself more for reacting.
She was furious just thinking about how the glimpse him left her
wanting.

He stared at her sour expression for a
moment, then crossed to the wall. He leaned back against it with
the half-smile that made her heart skip. “I hope we aren’t going to
have round three, Ginny.”

She scowled. “Round three?”

“
It’s a term used in
pugilism. When the men fight, they do it in timed
rounds.”

“
Hand to hand combat is a
bit out of my league.” She gave him her haughtiest
glare.

Instead of accepting her set-down, he
laughed. “If there were a battle of acid tongues, I don’t think any
opponent would survive to round three against you.”

She couldn’t help the small smile that
tilted her lips at his teasing. Damn, she was starting to like him.
That wouldn’t do at all.

Taking a deep breath, she refocused.
She’d come to the cottage to say something. The best thing to do
would be to say it and get away from him. Back to the safety of the
house where she could pretend he didn’t exist. Not that it had been
working.

“
Actually, I came here today
to apologize to you.”

Both his eyebrows arched in surprise.
“Really?”

“
Yes.” She paced back and
forth in front of the door. “I was very frightened when I didn’t
know where you’d taken my son a few days ago. I became upset, but
my anger wasn’t fair to you. The second I saw you with Jack, I knew
you wouldn’t ever purposefully bring him physical harm.”

Of course, it was the accidental and
emotional harm she feared more. But there was no use in saying
that.

Simon pushed off the wall in much the
same way he had in the stable those few days before. Her heart
leapt with the memory. Would he kiss her now as he had
then?

But he didn’t.

“
Thank you. I never
wanted to cause you upset.” He smiled down at her. “In fact, I
owe
you
an apology, as well.
I have let my baser instincts take over my control on two
occasions. I shouldn’t have taken advantage of your fragile state
and kissed you. No matter what I want, I had no right to act on my
desire when it comes to you.”

Ginny leaned back in utter shock. Once
again, he was making no excuses for what had occurred between them.
In fact, he admitted he desired her, a fact that sent warmth
spreading through her to her very toes.

She shrugged one shoulder and hoped he
couldn’t see what an enormous effect he had on her. “I’ll admit my
time since Henry’s death has been difficult-”

He nodded as he edged a bit closer.
“That’s exactly what I mean. I never should have gone so far. I
hope you can forgive that and perhaps we can try to be…
friends?”

She looked up into his sea blue eyes.
There was nothing disingenuous about his offer, even if she did
still see his need flickering there. It made her feel all the worse
that she still didn’t want his presence in her home. There were
secrets he couldn’t discover and control she couldn’t
relinquish.

“
We’ll see.”

With a nod, she slipped from the
cottage and hurried down the path toward the main house. Once she
could see he wasn’t going to follow her, she slowed her pace to
think.

No matter what she’d thought of the
man at first blush, now she had to admire his sense of honor and
responsibility. Unfortunately, those were the very things she would
be forced to use against him. Because if she allowed him to get too
close, he would undoubtedly find out the truth about the events of
the night Henry died.

And if that happened, she could lose
everything.

***

“I really must object to this entire idea, once
again.”

Ginny glared at Harriet over the edge
of her teacup before she smiled and waved across the veranda at
Jack and his nanny. “Look at him. What other choice do I have? If
Simon uncovers the truth, I could lose my son. I could lose
everything I have. He has to go before he gets too
close.”

Harriet shook her head as she waved
her maid away. “But if you now realize he has honor, that’s a
reason to
trust
him, not use
that against him.”

Ginny shut her eyes with a sigh. Why
did Harriet have to voice her very own thoughts? The ones that made
her hot with shame. “Honor is all well and good, but it’s
fleeting.”

“
Not true honor.”

Ginny looked out over Harriet’s small
estate with eyes that barely saw the beautiful lawn and small rose
garden her friend insisted on tending herself.

“
Henry was considered a man
of honor by his peers. But the first time I felt the back of his
hand against my cheek, I realized honor is something men use or
not, as it suits them. Why shouldn’t I have some of that privilege
for myself if it will save me or my child?”

Harriet pursed her lips as her eyes
filled with tears. “Oh, you’ve been so hurt for so long. I hate how
bitter it’s made you. I want you to be happy, but I fear you’re
doing yourself more harm than good with the way you’re handling the
situation with Simon Webber.”

Ginny ignored the continuing sting of
truth that accompanied each and every one of her friend’s words and
instead hardened her face and her heart. “I am not bitter, I’m
clever.”

She pushed her plate away and stood up
to pace to the veranda wall.

“
Listen to what you’re
saying and tell me if it doesn’t sound like bitterness.” Harriet
crossed to her side and grabbed both Ginny’s hands. Her friend
wouldn’t let her pull away when she tried. “This man is honorable,
he’s kind, and he admits he desires you. In response to all those
things, you plot against him. You’re trying to find a way to use
his desire, and your own, to push him away.”

Ginny frowned as she ducked her
friend’s stare. The truth of the words collided with her own fears,
but the fears were stronger. She’d learned from experience that
only she could protect herself, not depend on family or friends or
even the man who made her so weak, to help her.

She slowly extracted herself from
Harriet’s grip. “I’m sorry you won’t help me, but I hope you won’t
do anything to hinder me, either.”

With a purse of her lips, Harriet
shook her head. “I’d never do anything to cause you
pain.”

Ginny wrinkled her brow. That wasn’t
exactly the promise she’d hoped for, but considering the
circumstances, it was probably the best she would get. Harriet was
torn by misguided trust and beliefs. It wasn’t her
fault.

Ginny returned to her seat. “He wants
to arrange the game of Pall Mall. Will you come?”

Harriet shrugged. “Will his famous
valet, first-mate, best friend be the fourth in our
group?”

Ginny nodded. “Yes. He’s a nice enough
fellow, or at least he seemed to be when I met him. Not as handsome
as Simon, of course, but pleasant.” She smiled as she remembered
the stocky, rugged man. “He almost has a pirateish air to
him.”

Harriet’s eyes grew wide. “Really?
Well, if I’m to play croquet with a pirate, how can I turn down the
invitation? I’ll be there whenever he wants us to play.”

Ginny sighed her relief. She needed
Harriet’s support, even if her friend didn’t approve of or
understand her methods.

“
Thank you.” She gave her a
brief hug. “I know you mean well.”

As she watched her son run across the
lawn with a giggle, Ginny leaned back with a faded smile. Whether
Harriet agreed or not, she was making the right decision. The
doubts in her head were only caused by nervousness, not the fact
that Simon made her knees quake or caused a strange stirring in her
heart she’d thought would never exist again.

Chapter Seven

Simon tapped the end of his pen
against the parchment spread out along the desk before him. He’d
been staring at columns of numbers and letters for hours, and had
only come to one conclusion. His cousin was more of a bastard than
he’d known.

Not only did the ledgers outline what
a miserly man Henry had been when it came to his family, but how
generous he’d chosen to be to a long line of mistresses. Including
some who he’d entertained in the very cottage Simon now resided in.
‘The Den’ his cousin had called it when he made notations regarding
it in his journals. Though they were supposed to be a detailed
accounting of his expenses, they read more like a bragging session
in a club backroom.

Simon sniffed in disgust as he turned
another page. It wasn’t as if he’d ever liked his pompous cousin,
but now the fire burning in him was something akin to hatred. How
could Henry bring such pain to his wife? How could he want anyone
else when he had Ginny at his side and in his bed?

It wasn’t as if a man could get bored
with her. She had a fire in her eyes that told Simon instinctively
how responsive she was. He could only imagine how she’d arch up
under a skilled hand, lead a man to each spot that made her writhe.
If he shut his eyes, he could almost feel her wrap long, supple
legs around his waist, hear her urge him on with soft cries and
passionate endearments.

The quill in his hand snapped in two,
sending the inky tip skidding across the desk with a trail of black
liquid.

“
Damn!” Simon pulled a
handkerchief from his pocket to dab it up. His whole body coursed
with desire.

With another, saltier curse, he tossed
the handkerchief into the waste bin beside the desk. He needed to
concentrate on his duties, not his cousin’s alluring wife. After
all, he’d made a promise not to touch her again. Imagining doing
that and more was only a futile exercise in frustration.

He rubbed his eyes, then turned his
focus back to the ledger. More evidence of Henry’s cruelty glared
up at him. He’d taken control of Ginny’s inheritance after her
father’s death nearly two years before. Within months he had spent
every penny, mostly on things his wife couldn’t have approved of.
He’d gambled on horse races with some, drank away a good portion
and even… Simon blinked in disbelief. Even paid for his mistress’s
lodging for a year with the rest.

His vision blurred with rage. Did
Ginny know about these things? Judging from her seeming distaste
for her late husband, he’d wager she did. And though she hid it
well now, at some point that knowledge must have broken her heart.
No wonder she was so icy toward him, so distant from anyone who
could cause her pain.

As if conjured by his confused mind,
the door opened and Ginny entered the room. When her gaze fell on
him, she blushed. “Oh, excuse me, I didn’t realize you would be
here this afternoon.”

The chair screeched across the floor
as he rose to his feet as quickly as he could. “Please come
in.”

She nodded slowly and took another
step into the room. He devoured her with his eyes, drawn to her
even more now that he knew some small part of what she’d suffered.
Despite her painful union with his cousin, she maintained a grace
about her that erased any humiliation another woman might have felt
in her place.

He sidestepped the desk and motioned
to his neglected seat. “If you need to use the room, I can leave.
I’m not doing anything I can’t finish at a later date.”