The Deep Link (The Ascendancy Trilogy Book 1) (17 page)

They gain speed, making the floor quake under their barbed
feet. I push on and run faster, my lungs combusting with the freezing air.

-

Amharr brings the striker to a halt in mid-air, and clasps
his hands on the synaptic nubs of his console.

She's inside the hive right now, hunted by those vermin
.

All of the striker's plasma jets, shockwave cannons, and
particle disintegrator streams gear up to full power. And hammer down on the
hive.

Large cracks open in the side of the gigantic
construction, ripped out by jets of deadly fire. Chunks of rock, ice, and
crystal tumble into the snow, blown out by the bombardment, crumbling into
ruin.

Amharr takes the striker closer and aims for the caverns
through the ruptured outer vines. Swirls of hot moisture gush from inside, and
soon limbs and bodies start tumbling out of the hive's wounds. Screams fill the
atmosphere and vibrate along the perceptive hull of the striker, crawling into
Amharr's awareness.

The rush spurs him on even more, paired with the
frustration that's been gnawing at him ever since the human first plunged into
his life. He relays all of his energy into the weapons, launching endless
torrents of blazing plasma charges at everything within reach.

-

Violent quakes shake the hive. I lose my footing and hold
on to the wall. Multiple explosions vibrate through the tunnels, growing louder
and stronger each time.

The hive is under attack.

In a matter of seconds, hundreds of thousands of Dorylinae
burst into the tunnels, heading for the underground caverns.

I start running again, every fiber in my muscles scorched
by exhaustion. Behind me, the snaps of the Protectors are drowned out by the
thundering avalanche of bodies gushing through the tunnels.

They're all coming my way.

I'll be crushed by the Protectors. Trampled to death by
the panicked hordes. There's no way to escape but
out
into the freezing
winds. My suit is shredded and my skin's turning white from the aggressive
nitrogen frostbite. I take hasty breaths through the failing oxy-mask and the
thin, freezing air burns in my chest.

I have no choice. I pick up the pace and rush down the
sloping tunnel. Each time I look back I see them getting closer—a wriggling
mass of charcoal bodies and jagged limbs, hunting me with murderous hatred.

I run, leap and scramble, panting desperately for the
freezing air.

Then I see an opening in the wall. Push off the floor in a
clumsy leap, and grapple for the exit. The sharp rocks shred my gloves and suit
as I squeeze through the narrow slit, pain nipping at my flesh.

I tumble out into the snow and the implacable storm hits
me like a crashing wave, knocking me to the ground.

I stagger up and stagger forward, bending against the
winds cutting into my suit. My fingers turn to ice, and then to stone.

Massive chunks of rock tumble off the hive and hit the
ground, barely missing me. I turn and look up. Jagged craters tear through the
hive's surface, spilling out bodies by the thousands, growing on the immense
construction like a disease.

Rock by rock, chunk by chunk, the hive collapses.

Behind the falling debris and eddies of razor-sharp ice,
Protectors rip the wall open and plummet toward me.

I drop to my knees and sink into the snow. My body's
cooling rapidly in the lashing winds and I can barely move. Nitrogen crystals
form on my skin and burrow into my flesh.

A ship darts back and forth above me, spitting streams of
fire into the bowels of the hive, tearing it open like a gutted beast. I squint
through the glistening cold petrifying my eyes, and believe I recognize it.

The horde of Protectors is almost here.

I can't stand up anymore, can't run, can't fight. In less
than a minute, I'll be dead.

A sudden blast of air throws me on my back. My head spins
and my lungs decompress. My useless mask is almost glazed with ice, but I still
catch glimpses of the world around me.

The ship is descending. Its underside ripples and
illuminates as it slides over me toward the base of the hive. It breaks into a
hailstorm of molten lava and pelts the approaching Protectors into the ground
just meters away from my feet. They squirm and writhe, bursting into horrible
screams as they burn alive.

The ship spins around and lands on their charred bodies,
crunching them into the snow. It opens up on a side and spits out a green lump
that comes running toward me through the blizzard. It picks me up, throws me
over its shoulder, and carries me into the ship.

Painful convulsions run through my frostbitten body as I'm
laid on the floor. Gary crouches next to me and removes the defective mask from
my face. I squint past his clawed feet to Amharr's pitch-black stare, and my
heart gives out.

The memory of the dying Dorylinae keeps me conscious. Their
burning bodies hitting the snow, their ashes whipped away by cutting winds. My
family is gone. He killed them all.

I don't care whose fault it is that we've reached this
point. I don't care if it was me who caused our connection or him. I don't give
a
damn
if he's here to take me back with him or kill me. All I want is
to reach into his chest and yank his fucking heart out, just like he did with
mine. I want him to suffer.

Gary steps aside. My eyes swim with tears I can't blink
away. Amharr is coming toward me.

I cough, and try to push myself up.

He stops just out of my reach.

How can he stand there so impassive and cold, knowing what
he just did, knowing how it
kills
me inside? The smell of burning chitin
is still clear in my mind. I'm certain he can feel what I feel. Somewhere
inside him there's a mirror of myself. He
must
know.

Amharr bends over and picks me up by the neck, leaving my
feet to dangle above the floor. The tips of his fingers press between my
vertebrae in a dozen places. He allows me to breathe, but his grip is so tight
that every tiny movement is painful.

I clench my teeth. My hands trail down his chest and rest
on his flexible sternum. I can feel his pulse. It has the same rhythm as mine.

One of his fingers wanders up the back of my neck into my
hair, making my spine tingle.

"You reckless creature." His voice runs through
me like a heatwave. "If you lust for death, you need not look for it with
them. I am right here."

My palms press flat against his chest. An electric prickle
creeps through my fingers. I press harder against him.

"Why?" I choke.

"You would have been slaughtered."

"I would've made it..."

"You would have died."

"Better me than them."

"You're lying."

"And you're a fucking murderer."

He looks down at my hands against his chest. "I did
not hide that from you. You know what I am."

"I never wanted to know you."

"Nor I you."

My palms begin it itch.
His
palms itch as well. I
can feel his muscles contract and his nerves flare up with tension.

He's right. I know exactly what he is, what he does, what
he feels right now. I know, because he's mirrored somewhere deep within me as
well. I understand him... And I realize he's just as lonely and confused as I
am. We're both trapped within each other, and we can't break free.

He's become a part of me. He's swallowed all my demons and
spat them back in my face, destroyed my peace and my world, my family,
my
life
. But he forces me to face the truth, to understand myself, as he is
forced to understand himself through me.

I dig my thumbs into the soft seam of his chest, and
slowly rip him open. My hands throb with heat. My whole body is aglow with
hunger.

Hundreds of tendrils snake out of his hands and rush up my
neck, crawl over my lips and slide into my mouth. A quivering moan escapes me
as he floods my nerves. He invades my mind in a frenzied hunt, devouring my
thoughts one by one, consuming my memories and feelings like a starving beast.
He's insatiable, savage, driven by a kind of desperation that I can't even
begin to comprehend.

This time, it doesn't hurt. Maybe I'm too numb, maybe I'm
too close to death, but I don't feel any pain. And I am not afraid.

He's like a flood of heat and energy permeating my whole
being, melting my resolve and my grief, dissolving my past and my present,
cleansing me. His consciousness mixes with mine, his thoughts connect to mine,
and for a powerful and endless moment we are one.

You are a part of me
, he makes me understand.
And
I'm a part of you, until either one of us dies
.

I know
.

Do you want to die
?

No
.

Do you want
me
to die
?

...
No
.

Then we will remain one
.

I open my eyes and look at him. He pulls me closer until
his forehead touches mine.

Silence grows inside me like an ocean, erasing all my
fears and anger and regret, washing me away. His touch—his inescapable
nearness—brings me peace. He fills me with a kind of serenity I've never known
before.

Then he lets go.

I collapse on the floor. Blood comes rushing back into my
prickling limbs. I draw a deep breath, and then another, slowly inhabiting my
own body again.

Amharr returns to his console. I can feel every step
vibrate through the responsive floor. I can feel him level out, sense his focus
return as my own thoughts fall back into place.

There's no way out of this
.
Ever again
.

Gary comes to tend to me. He smears a sticky goo over my
face with his clawed hands. It smells awful. The room starts to spin and I have
trouble staying awake. He sticks a thin tube into my nose that pumps heated
oxygen into my lungs. I grope about and yank it out, scratching my face.

Gary grunts and grabs my hands. "Stop fighting. Let
me help."

Tears well up in my eyes again, making my whole face hurt.
I nod at him. He shoves the tube back into my nose and I take a few painful
breaths until I calm down. All the time I watch Amharr behind his console,
focusing on his damn controls as if this never happened. I desperately want to
hate him, to summon all my strength and willpower and wish him dead. But I
can't.

The humming of the floor and the nauseating goo on my face
send me into a shallow sleep. When I come to I'm hanging over Gary's shoulder,
his heavy hand pressed down on the small of my back. The Mazan winds nip at me
as I'm carried through the storm in long, heavy strides. I stick my fingers
into the dark green fluff on Gary's back, and hold on tight.

He stops in the middle of the howling storm, and pounds
his fist against bare metal. I push up and peer around his large head,
recognizing the hatch of the
Transiter
opening up before us. I try to
smile, but my skin won't budge under the thick goo. It's frozen stiff around
the oxygen tube stuck in my nose.

Gary heaves me into the
Transiter
, then jumps in
too. He crouches protectively over me like an alien mama bear with green,
living fur. He stops me from clawing at my face again. The hatch snaps shut and
the repressurization pumps hiss at full power. A pair of feet shuffles closer.

"Bug-Nut? What the fuck—"

I cough through the goo.

"Get away from her," Jade yells. His shaky voice
doesn't sound too menacing.

I tap on Gary's ankle and he makes room for me to sit up.
I tear the sheath of goo off my face and gasp greedily for the familiar air.

"It's okay, Jade..." My voice is hoarse and
weak. "He's with me. It's okay."

Gary straightens up. "You are friend?"

Jade stares at him with his mouth open.

I grab Gary's hand and pull myself up to my feet.
"He's a friend, alright. Relax."

"Yeah, friend, I'm all friend, no foe, I'm
harmless," Jade babbles, staring at the muscle-packed Kolsamal.

I want to laugh but every single muscle in my face and
neck hurts.

"Good," Gary says in his coarse English. Then he
turns to me, speaking in his own tongue: "Now you are in this human's
care. Stay safe. Do not aggravate the Dominant again."

"I didn't
aggravate
him. He's not my
responsibility."

The Kolsamal grunts at me disapprovingly. "You never
learn."

"Okay,
fine
." I squeeze his hand.
"I'll be careful. I promise."

Gary clucks his slimy tongue at me, then stares at Jade
for a moment. He kicks the hatch open and jumps out into the storm.

Jade rushes to close the hatch behind him. He leans
against it, shivering from head to toe. Lets out a long sigh, and hurries back
to his chair without asking me a single thing. I sit too, rubbing my face.

Jade brings up both containment fields and takes off. I
can't even look at the projected image inside my milky cocoon as we veer away
from the ruins of my home.

When we're safely away and Jade is satisfied we're not
going to be fired upon by Tick surveillance drones, he lowers the containment
fields and gives me a bewildered look. "Care to explain what just
happened? What was that alien doing here? Why did they shoot at the hive? What
did you
do
?"

"Why didn't you leave?"

"I asked you first."

I sigh. "Where do I even start...?"

"Anywhere," he snaps. "Fuck, Taryn! I swear
I'll never talk to you again if you don't explain this shit to me right
now."

I lean back into the chair and rub my fingers together to
get rid of the constant tingle. It's useless, as I expected. Guess that'll be a
thing
from now on. Just great.

I start with what really happened in that first encounter
between me and Amharr, clumsily trying to explain what the Emranti are. I talk
about the actual reason he kept me there for almost a month, and the
conflicting, mind-twisting way I've been feeling ever since. I work my way to
the present, to what happened inside the hive, and what happened aboard
Amharr's striker.

Jade listens attentively, and falls into a deep silence.

I hope he understands it somehow, but I don't need him to.
Maybe it's better if he doesn't, if he thinks it's some kind of PTSD or
Stockholm syndrome. Those would at least give him the illusion that I'll be
normal again, one day. An illusion I no longer entertain.

I know I should feel defeated, even hopeless. But I can't
help feeling as though I haven't lost something dear to me, so much as gained
something completely new and invaluable. Something I have yet to fully
understand.