The Deadliest Secret (The Deadliest Series) (17 page)

             
Torrian was stunned into silence. He didn’t move Gwen looked at his chest to make sure he was still breathing. They both sat in silence for minutes Gwen was shifting uncomfortably. Torrian had never been so quiet before, his expression darkened.

             
“What?”

             
“I dated him, I thought I was in love with him.”

             
“Gwen why didn’t you fucking tell me earlier?” Torrian spit the words out.

             
“I didn’t know immediately it was him, I told you I buried the memories, I repressed them out of pain.” Gwen’s voice shot up an octave.

             
“When did you know it was him?”

             
“I don’t know.” She wrapped her arms around herself for comfort.

             
Torrian watched Gwen as she covered herself, his tone softened. “Baby I am just worried about you, he could have hurt you so many times.”

             
“He played cat and mouse with my memory but that is it, till today.”

             
“I don’t want you to see him anymore, we need to tell the warden, he knows something is up and why is he the one that told me you left early?”

             
“I didn’t know how to tell you everything. I thought you would find me disgusting for having had sex with him even in the past when he wasn’t so bad.” Gwen looked down again.

             
“Baby just tell me these things, but I am serious, no more visits for Kody. He can’t be trusted with you.” Torrian was back to his protective stance on the issue.

             
“I can’t just drop him as a patient, I will go down to once a week and it must be supervised, as much as I hate that, it’s how it must be. He broke the rules.”

             
“That’s my girl, and I’ll be the one to sit in with you.”

             
“I don’t think that’s a good idea, he’s been talking about our past, he isn’t shy about adding explicit details.” Gwen was trying to reason with him.

             
“Fuck… Gwen you can’t shut me out like this when it comes to him. He’s dangerous.”

             
“I know Torrian just give me someone else or it goes down to once a week, he has to stay seated and I stay at my desk with a hand on the alarm and you can stay right at the door.”

             
“Deal. I want to be the one to deal with him if he ever tries that shit again with you.” Torrian sounded positively lethal at this point.

             
“I know,” Gwen pulled her legs underneath her body, “can you hand me that pad and pen right there, and I’ll work on his notification letter.”

             
“Atta girl.” Torrian praised her

             
“I should probably talk to his cell mate, see what he knows. Which inmate is it?”

             
“Russel Weaver.” Torrian sounded short, he obviously did not like Gwen putting herself in more danger by talking to McQueen’s cellmate, but what could she do? She had to get to the bottom of this.

             
She took out her planner and started moving a few sessions around, she then called the office to inform them of the changes, and the addition of Russel Weaver to her schedule. He had to know something, and if she could contain it, even better.

Chapter fourteen

Thursday was moving at a torturously slow pace for Kody. He was in solitary confinement but with the tragedy that befell him on Tuesday was too much to be ignored. He wanted to see Gwen; it was almost time for their second appointment for the week. Kody was not granted access to a clock but he could feel it was. His body had become restless as it always did when it knew he would be near Gwen soon.  He stared at the plain white ceiling; he traced the crack over and over again with his eyes he memorized each indention, each chip in the paint, and each and every speck of dirt that crowded the small imperfection. He grunted in dismay. There was the sound of a door opening in the distance, he sat up on his cot and the footsteps came closer.

              “Afternoon McQueen, you have a letter from the administration,” Torrian Ford was at Kody’s cell with a letter delivery, what kind of shit was this Kody thought, “nice face by the way, finally get tired of the piece of shit you see in the mirror every day?”

             
“Fuck you, now give me my letter and take me to Gwen.” Kody’s voice was full of venom.

             
“That is who this is from.” Torrian held the letter just out of Kody’s reach.

             
“Give it to me or I swear to God I’ll kill everyone you love.” The threat had Kody’s lips peeling back all the way from his teeth.

             
“Here asshole, enjoy your day.” Torrian flipped the letter at Kody and started to walk away.

             
Kody picked up the letter and called after Torrian, “fuck-wad isn’t it time for my fucking appointment? I’ve been awake for hours.”

             
“Just read the letter McQueen.”

             
Kody sat and opened the letter cursing at Torrian, the letterhead was heavy and he noticed it was from Gwen’s office, her handwriting just as it was when they were in college together.  He admired the script before he read the letter.

Dear Kody McQueen,

              This letter is from G. Bjorkman the psychologist you have been seeing at McNeil Island Penitentiary. The recent incident with unwanted advances and unwanted attention was over the line of all propriety and deeply offended me. I will be taking you back down to one hour once a week for your sessions, and there will be a guard standing post at the door to ensure my own safety. If an incident like this occurs again I will be unable to be your psychologist and will either refer you to a colleague of mine or I will remove you from our program. There are no more warnings please heed this one.

Gwen Bjorkman PhD.

              Kody read the note three times before he comprehended what it said. Gwen was taking their time away from him. She didn’t want him to see her as much. She was taking away his reason for living. He felt bile rise in his throat and his chest constricted as if an elephant was sitting on him preventing his lungs from inflating for a full breath.

             
“FUCK” he growled loudly.

             
Kody began to tear up the letter. He wasn’t going to see Gwen again, he couldn’t plead with her and she was so resolved against him now. He needed to get her back. He lay back on the small bed and looked at the crack again, tracing it with his eyes once more. The crack was a perfect metaphor for how he felt, he was strong on the outside, he was cold, hard, and calculating, but this one woman has gotten under his skin and would slowly destroy him from the inside out. He rubbed his chest to try and ease the pain.

              Russel was enjoying his time alone, he didn’t have a cellmate and that was working for him. Kody was a pain in his ass. He always started some sort of fight or talks shit. The guard came with his usual swagger; he looked like he just pissed in someone’s corn flakes and was delighted by doing so. Correctional Officer Ford opened the bar door to his cell, this was unusual.

             
“You’re coming with me Weaver.”

             
“The fuck? I don’t see that shrink bitch.”

             
“Tough shit you’re seeing her today.” The officer seemed to be bipolar, his mood switched from buoyant to asshole in two seconds flat by mention of that fake bitch in the office.

             
“Whatever you say Officer Dipshit.” Russel put his hands behind his back and Torrian handcuffed him quickly, a little tighter than normal, payback for the dipshit comment no doubt, the two walked in silence.

             
Russel had only been to the shrink doctor blowjob Bjorkman, as he liked to call her, seriously what was with the name he thought, she succeeded on having a name no one could pronounce the first time. Ford seemed anxious as they got closer and closer to the administration building.

             
“Keep your dick in your pants and your mitts off the doc got it?”

             
“Or else what will happen? I’ll go to jail?” Russel scoffed.

             
“No you’ll get McQueen back in your cell.” Torrian lifted his brow with the threat.

             
“Fuck you.” Russel countered.

             
“I can do it now if you would rather have him pound your ass.” Torrian kept steady, pegging Russel with an icy glare.

             
“Fine, fuck it take me to the slob on my knob bitch.”  The air became charged but Russel stood his ground against the much larger security guard.

             
“Do not talk about her that way.” Torrian said through gritted teeth, bingo Russel hit a nerve on the male.

             
“Why you fucking her too?” Russel dug deeper.

             
“None of your business who I fuck.” They were at the elevator now, the guard pushed the button.

             
“So how much juice you on?” Russel said before the doors closed.

             
A quick punch landed to Russel’s stomach, all the breath he thought he owned exited his body.  Torrian held him up not letting his body sag down.

             
“I told you not to talk about her, and you keep her name and mine out of your filthy fucking mouth or I swear to everything holy your stay here will get a lot worse.” His threat was intense; his eyes echoed the deadly promise, Russel nodded his head.

             
Torrian Ford was feral. Russel had to hold his tongue in order to continue breathing. His huge fist knocked uncharacteristically light on the door in front of them. It was the shrink’s office.

              Gwen jumped when the knock came at her door. It was time for Kody’s cellmate Russel to come in and see her.

             
“Come in.” She answered and she tried to keep the shakiness out of her voice.

             
Torrian opened the door and shoved the prisoner in. He was not in a pleasant mood. They spent most of the night arguing about what to do with the Kody situation. Gwen had agreed to take him down to once a week and slowly remove him from the therapy program in order to prevent a huge panic with him and to keep him somewhat docile. Her Tuesday afternoons would be somewhat arduous but the rest of her week would go smoothly. She would be able to make it to Friday without more incidents and hopefully her nightmares would quell. The memories that Kody had unlocked had been plaguing her conscious and unconscious states. The only thing that kept her sane was Torrian comforting her after the heinous dreams.

             
“I brought your one o’clock Gwen,” Torrian had come around to calling her informally at work; she smiled at the way his lips curled around her name.

             
“How thoughtful, thank you Torrian. I trust you will keep close by?”

             
“Wild horses couldn’t drag me away.” This was the most comforting thing he could say, they had listened to the song many times together.

             
“Very well then, I’ll see you when my session with Mr. Weaver here is complete.” Gwen gave her beau her best attempt at a dazzling smile while he worked the handcuffs off of Russel.

             
Torrian left the room and Russel visibly relaxed. Gwen moved to her desk and grabbed her legal pad and pen combo. “Please Russel have a seat, make yourself comfortable. I just wanted to check on you and see how your adjustment is going with your cellmate Kody McQueen.”

             
“It fucking stinks.” Russel sat down when he cursed and rubbed his wrist.

             
“Why does it stink? Do you two not get along?” She inquired.

             
“No it’s like Mary fucking sunshine all the time.” He snapped.