The Dark Places (5 page)

Matt showed no sign that the toasty
morning temperature affected him. He pulled me past the forest of various-styled
intersystem star ships at a relentless pace. Although I was unfamiliar with
ship types, I recognized the larger ones taking up huge real estate on the
pavement as crew-operated, professional merchanters. I had no time to gawk at
the different vessels before Matt dragged me along. He could have hired a port
flitter to take us to his vessel, but Matt’s path seemed not to be toward the
landing field’s distant, more heavily populated area, but a nearby, outer-edge
section.

We stopped below a graceful,
silver-and-gold vessel. It was about one-quarter the size of the behemoth
merchanters we’d passed, but it was respectable, nevertheless. The ship lay
delicately poised at a horizontal position on her landing gear struts. Our
luggage, along with several small shipping crates and the large, wrapped
Harnaru canvas, were neatly stacked beside the vessel.

The port’s maintenance and
refueling crew was retracting their tanker’s robo-feed arm and preparing to
depart in their large service hauler tanker. One of the gray-uniformed crew
trotted toward us. The harried-looking, stocky man carried a digi-pad and
looked like he was in charge.

“All the potable water tanks’
recycling systems are good, and the life support systems for eighty-twenty
O-Two-Nitrogen air recirculation are recharged and in excellent condition. The
auxiliary fuel tanks are at 100 percent. She checks out also on all externally
accessible engine systems, Mr. Lorins, and your M-Cells are good, no recharge
needed. The port will send the full checklist shortly to your ship comps.” The
man consulted his digi-pad. “Ah—and all the items you ordered from the port’s
general store depot are over there with your luggage.”

“Thanks. I appreciate your help.” Matt
nodded.

“Our pleasure.
We hope to see you again at the Marnu Interstellar Port, Mr. Lorins.” The
service crewman scurried away and hopped onto the service tanker with his work
crew. They took off for their next destination through the pavement’s
shimmering heat ghosts.

We stood alone near the ship. Matt
glanced down at me. I didn’t like the distant coldness in his expression, nor
the icy green glints sparking his eyes.
Where
have all the golden specks gone?

“This is the
Stardancer
, Kailiri. I fly alone. You will have to learn her basic
operations so that you can pilot her in case something happens to me. This ship
will be our home for many long stretches of time. I’m an independent far-rim
trader. You are now a trader’s wife and, therefore, my venture partner. I will
acquaint you with all you must know about my accounts, trade routes, and trade
stock merchandise. When we reach Rikin, I’ll document a release statement to
you regarding the
Stardancer
, her
stock, and certain property holdings in the event of my demise.”

His demise
?
I stared at Matt.
He’d spoken coldly for the first time since I’d known him these brief hours of
our acquaintance, marriage, and mating. His icy manner struck me more forcibly
than finding out he was an intersystem trader and I’d become his partner—or
that grim last statement about mortality.

“Come, I’ll introduce you to your
new home and means of escape from Harnaru,” he said with a bitter twist to
those precise-chiseled lips that had enthralled me with kisses throughout the
night.

My throat tightened. I swallowed
and held my breath a long, tense moment. Matt was beginning to frighten me
again.
Did he suspect I’d contacted
Interplex?
Impossible.

He moved closer to the ship. A
protected ident-seal plate appeared at his touch on the silver hull, located in
a recessed area on the lower level. Matt activated the personal ident-locking
device on his ship first by saying his name and then with his handprint on the
small scanner. He stepped back and, grasping my arm, pulled me a safe distance
as the ship awakened, opened her portal, and extended a short ramp down to the
concrete.

“When we’re in flight, I’ll program
the
Stardancer
to accept your voice
and handprint ident upon all locking devices upon the ship,” he said in the
same distant manner.

Matt led me up the ramp. We crossed
the small, wide-open airlock in two steps, and then we were inside the
Stardancer
. I held my breath at the
simple, compact, yet comfortable grace of her interior. She was larger than
five of my old studio rooms together on her combined control deck and living
areas.

I followed him to where he showed
me two sleeping cabins, one larger than the other. The larger was ours, he
said. When I asked about the beds, as I saw only a wide couch there, Matt
touched a control on the hull. The cushioned back receded, and the couch became
a full-sized bed. My neck heated up fast beneath my coverall’s red collar as I
envisioned his desirable, unclothed body on it and remembered it was just him
and me on that ship. I quickly backed out the cabin.

The ship had many surprising
comforts hidden in compact places. I began to understand then that my mysterious
mate was a man possessed of no small means. The ship was expensive—of that I
was certain—and she seemed to be a fairly recent ship model too. New
intersystem ships were more than expensive. They were almost unaffordable. What
kind of lucrative trade dealings was Matt involved in? I stifled the hasty
suppositions about possible involvement with illegal commodities.

We returned to the control deck,
and Matt crossed his arms over his chest and watched me without expression. “The
Stardancer
has
a
gravity
well, so neither we, nor anything aboard, will float while we’re
in zero gravity. I’ll give you a tour of the engine, cargo, and service
compartments after we’re in flight, Kailiri. You’ll learn soon how your new
home operates, along with all the basic energy and utility conservation that’s
vital for survival in space.”

I nodded once to show willingness
to comply.

“And you’ll learn about the ship’s
defense operations. I’ll not allow raiders or pirates to carry off my wife or
my ship.” If possible, his tone became harsher.

Does
he truly care about me?
A furtive glance showed me the planes in his jaws
had hardened. This was a serious matter to him. I’d never killed anyone, although
I’d wanted to several times on Dearleth. I gave another nod.

Silence fell between us and I
consulted his eyes. The missing gold glints had reappeared and intermingled
among the green sparks once more, but it didn’t make that stare any friendlier.
Panic brewed within at the thought that I would be sealed in for who knows how
long with this improbable stranger, who didn’t exist as Matt Lorins before five
years ago.
Who was he?
Was Harry
right? Was my new husband a criminal, a detective—or spy—posing as a trader?

“I’ll bring in the luggage and
supplies.” His gaze continued holding mine captive. “We’ll go over the port’s
checklist to make sure everything I requested was done. Then we’ll lift within
the next thirty minutes per the Marnu Port’s flight comp instructions.” He
didn’t move. His inscrutable stare stayed fixed upon me.

I swallowed and resisted the urge
to turn my back on him. He was making me uneasy. I desperately tried to think
of something to say.

“Thank you,” I finally managed to
whisper. What else could you say to a virtual stranger who marries you and
offers to take you away from your dreary, little, boring—but safely predictable—life?
“Thank you for marrying me and taking me with you.”

An expression that looked like keen
disappointment crossed Matt’s features.

Did
I offend him? What else am I supposed to say?

He turned away.

Constrained silence fell between
us. I wrung my hands. After several seconds, he left through the still-open
ship portal to bring in our luggage and bags. I stood numbly staring around the
ship’s interior, remembering his pained expression.

Why
did
he marry me?

Chapter Four

The
Stardancer
sped away from Harnaru on the thrust of her powerful
engines.
Mucleonic engines
, Matt had
informed me. He had spoken only about technical matters since I’d taken the
second navicon seat on his left. He gave brief explanations about the ship’s
navilog comp, how to tie in for planet liftoff, and how to access the flight
quantum sequence shift drive.
Whatever
that
was
.

He’d mentioned he often set the
navilog comp on programmed autoflight to allow him to rest and tend to other matters.
Matt had also summarized various ship functions controlled from the console and
from the small auxiliary controls inset beneath protective shields on the
chairs’ armrests. And he made certain to show me the defense station, with its
code-locked beamer weaponry and small missile armaments that would give most
raiders second thoughts about approaching his ship.

I regarded the imposing and complex
control console with awed respect, and silently vowed not to touch a single
button—unless impending doom threatened. It could
stay
on autoflight where I was concerned. Everything he’d described
promised grim repercussions if I made a mistake. The wrong button could send us
off
course,
disconnect ship power, or shutdown life
support…. I suppressed a shudder.
No,
despite whatever expectations my mate holds about our future together—however
brief that might be—I am
not
flying
this ship. I have absolutely
no
accreditations as a pilot-navigator.

I studied Matt’s profile where he
sat, his remote expression focused on the observation window. A deep breath
helped me pluck up my courage to say that which must be spoken.

“Matt… you don’t have to keep to
the terms of our marriage tract—whatever they were. You can set me down on the
next Alliance world. I’ll gladly absolve you of all responsibilities, and I’ll
void all claims I could have upon you and your property,” I said in what I
hoped was a steady, reasonable voice.

My open admittance to not
remembering if there had been specific marriage terms made me
bite
my lower lip in embarrassment. I hadn’t paid much
attention last night in City Records because I was too busy being
imprinted
by him, and I’d been too
distracted to ask during our impassioned night together.

He tossed me a fierce frown with
smoldering sparks in his glare. “Is that what you want, Kailiri?” he thundered.
“Is that
truly
what you want of me?”

I held my breath and clutched my
chair’s armrest. My stomach contracted.

Matt surged up from his chair. His
fingers knotted into fists at his side, and he closed his eyes a second. When
he looked at me again, his expression had shuttered and his low tone sounded
impersonal, as if he’d reined in his emotions. “I contracted and signed an open-term
marriage with you, true, but I didn’t intend for us to part so soon afterward.
I—I had hope of the possibility of a closed-term tract between us.”

A closed-term contract was a rarity
in our age: a lifelong commitment. Most couples started with short open agreements
and then chose the closed-term if they felt deeply bond-paired.

I rose and took a step toward him
and then stopped. It remained difficult to touch Matt as freely as he touched
me, and it probably wasn’t wise at that moment.

He razed me with a probing stare
wherein green mists wavered, then cleared. He closed the brief space between us,
framed my face between gentle hands, and covered my lips with his.

Cold numbness radiated through me,
followed by clenching tension and then a slow, sensuous unraveling within my core,
which yearned for him to warm and fill me. I wanted Matt. My arms entwined
themselves around his neck, and my fingers entangled themselves in his soft
dark hair. Dim awareness of pressing into him with overwhelming need reached my
dazed senses. He crushed me to him. Mild shock coursed through me at the tiny
whimpering sounds I made. My longing for him had become an actual tearing pain
deep within me. I’d never felt this way for any man.
What is wrong with me
?

A deep, dark ache lodged in my heart
and soul would not mend until we were one again. He swept me up without warning
and carried me to the sleeping quarters, where we began a feverish rediscovery
of each other’s bodies. This time, I pushed him gently onto his back and
climbed on top. I rode his body until I shattered inside. Matt huskily
whispered my name and spilled his warm seed deep in me before he pulled me down
onto his chest and enfolded me in his arms.

Chapter Five

I opened my eyes in slow degrees
and became aware of two things: the slight, abraded tenderness—but deeply
fulfilled—sensation in my lower parts, and soft thrumming from the ship’s
engines in the background. I stared at the unfamiliar surroundings. Then full
remembrance returned about where I was… and what had ensued between Matt and
me.

I turned and found the sleep couch
occupied only by me. I stumbled to my feet and ran a hasty hand through my hair
to tame the rampant curls. This was when I truly appreciated being on a ship
with a gravity well. The passenger liner I’d taken to Harnaru from Dearleth had
been barebones, without one. The long, zero-gravity flight had wreaked tangled
havoc on my hair.

I gathered the satiny black top
sheet about my nude body and crept with hesitant steps to the cabin’s door. It
parted with an almost inaudible hiss. I swept my gaze across the darkened
living area and over to the control deck until I found Matt, fully dressed and
sitting in his navicon chair in apparent deep thought. He stared at the rushing
star stream beyond the ship’s flight path. I padded toward him across the
thickly carpeted deck. When I stood beside his chair, he looked up as if drawn
from a trance.

Green mist swirled within his eyes.
I gasped and
stumbled
back fast, intending to flee,
with certain fear showing in my open-mouthed expression. He stood and took rapid
steps to overtake me. My throat went arid dry when he focused his mist-filled
gaze on me and grasped my arm.

“The ship’s locked on autoflight,”
he murmured as he towed me toward the living area. He sat on one of the low,
wide couches and pulled me down onto his lap. The green clouds had vanished
from his eyes by then.

“Who are you?” I whispered, daring
to lightly touch his hard-angled jaw.

Matt caught my questing hand in his
and imprisoned it over his heart. “Interplex couldn’t tell you, doll?” he asked
with a sardonic, bitter twist to his lips. His expression hardened as his eyes
narrowed.

How
does he know?
My breath caught in a choking gasp as I attempted to snatch
my captured hand from his. His strong fingers tightened painfully upon mine
until I stopped struggling. I waited with numb dread for whatever else he would
say.

He stared across at the observation
window’s star field.
“A long day’s journey into the night, doll.
That’s the essence of life.”

I stayed silent but quivered.
What is he
?

Matt focused on me. “My days have
all been dark. All the paths have led to death,” he whispered, “but you are my
guideline back to the light for a while, Kailiri.”

An icy chill raced along my back.
Part of me wanted to kiss those lips, saying impossible things. The other part
wanted to run and hide away somewhere on his ship. I wanted him to make sense,
to say the normal, complacent things most mated couples said to each other
after they’ve shared so intimately of themselves. I didn’t even know if
I
loved Matt beyond this painful
attraction I’d developed for him.
Is this
what he meant when he said we’d imprinted on each other?

“I pray that I may never draw you
into my own darkness, dear heart,” he said in a low tone that seemed filled
with deep regret and sadness. “Stay clear of the shadowed places that you might
find within me. Touch nothing but the smooth paths and walk only in the open
spaces of my heart, and you shall be safe.”

I was afraid of him
and
for him. My Real Quiet One was
treading dangerous, fragile bridges in his mind—and I didn’t want that. Not for
him, who seemed impervious to chemical depressants in great quantities, and
could remain alert and personable. I didn’t want to find that he was vulnerable
to mental phantasms that I couldn’t see or fight.

“Matt….” I choked and buried my
face in his shoulder to hide the threatening tears.

He released the hand he’d been
gripping, and I wrapped them both around him. He held me while my hot tears
soaked his tunic’s front.

Is
he a madman?
Sad, bitter thoughts haunted me. Was Harry right about that
probability?
At least he didn’t seem to
be a murderer, despite his anger at the things I’ve said and done.
I
finally lifted my head from Matt’s damp shoulder.

He solemnly regarded me. “Feeling
better now?” Quiet concern filled his tone. He lifted the finger that bore his
ring to trace a tear track along my cheek.

What
could I say?
I shook my head no to show that I did not.

“
I
would feel better if you stopped worrying about me, doll.”

“Matt, is… is there some way I can
help you?”

“Yes… stay with me until the final
darkness,” he softly said.

I shivered. “What are you talking
about?”

Matt smiled in a way that looked
sad and rueful at the same time. “I’m dying, doll.” He continued in his quiet
tone when I stared with speechless, open-mouthed dismay. “I am not perishing
from anything contagious or fatal to you. I’m dying from a bargain I made and
kept a long time ago in my wild and careless youth.”

I caressed his face. The hairs on
his chin and jaw were soft and almost nonexistent. I’d made a guess hours ago
that it was either due to an inhibitor potion or his beard was of the
slower-growing variety. He didn’t look anywhere near his middle years. In that
moment he looked very young and vulnerable. He
couldn’t
be dying. In the brief two days I’d known him, he’d seemed
full of virile, vitality energy and
life
.

He caught my questing hand in his,
and his expression shut down with a stern frown and his voice became curt, as
if he didn’t want my compassion.

“How long do you intend to sit
there arrayed like that? Are you giving yourself to me again, doll?”

A confused glance downward made me
blush. My improvised sheet wrapping had slipped far down my body, leaving my
breasts bare and very little else below my navel covered. When I made a belated
grab to gather the folds up, Matt stopped my hand, and his mouth captured mine
in a long, possessive kiss. My nipples hardened against him as urgent need revived
in the warm, melting sensation between my legs. I couldn’t understand my deep
physical attraction for this mysterious man, and I could
not
resist him whenever it surfaced.

He laid me back on the couch and
moved away to slip off his garments and boots. Then he kneeled over me and
peeled away the silk sheet until I lay uncovered before him. My lingering shock
from his disturbing revelation minutes ago fled at the sight of his outjutting
erection. I ran my fingers first over the soft black hair that formed a
definite swirl pattern, tracing up from his pubic area until it encircled his
inward-turned navel like an intricate, dark tattoo. Another
tantalizing mystery about my Real Quiet One
, I thought, then stroked
my hands lower over the rest of him until his body covered mine.

Slow, unmarked time passed as our
flesh merged. Exhaustion left us both drained and incapable of anything beyond
clinging to each other’s warm, sweat-slicked bodies.

Matt lay awake on his back, holding
me with lax arms. My becalmed senses were further lulled by his deep, even
breaths beneath my ear where I rested my head on his damp chest right over his
heart. The strong, vigorous life-pattern rhythm from it pounded insistently
against my cheek, and I could
not
understand how he could be dying. My arms tightened about him as fierce
determination surged through me.

I
will
not
allow him to die.
If he
wanted me to be his guideline back to the light, then I would be just that—a
guideline.

“Why does Interplex only have five
years of records for you, Matt?” I asked, dispelling the intimate calm and
sensual satisfaction binding us. Several times I had wanted to ask after my
discovery, but caution and fear had kept me silent. Now, in this moment after
passion melted away reservations with him and when I’d vowed to save him, I
dared.

“The years before
that are gone, memories only.
Dark memories that I chose to walk away
from forever…. Ask me, instead, about Rikin, my lady.” Matt spoke quietly, but
with my head upon his chest, it rumbled low in my ear and sent pleasant thrills
through my body down to my toes.

However, the grim
things he’d said made me pause and consider before speaking. “Will asking about
Rikin
answer
my first question?”

“No. It won’t, but it will keep you
in charity with me.” Dry amusement warmed his voice.

I moved my head and glanced up in
time to detect dancing glints in his eyes from the cabin’s low lights.
“Very well.
Why do you go to Rikin?”

“It’s a profitable stopover on my
trade route. No one goes there much since it’s a zero-tech world in a far-rim
quadrant, and no one wants to learn the locals’ language either. They don’t
speak Alliance Basic. The inhabitant’s trade practices are also a bit reversed
and archaic. It throws most traders. Rikin’s inhabitants mine a few valuable
precious stones that they’re amenable to trading for nonnarcotic analgesics
compatible with their physiology, and some nonmilitary articles, as approved by
the Alliance Exobiology Trade Commission Edicts for a zero-tech society.” He
answered as if quoting an official government document, and he laughed outright
at my unimpressed expression. It was the first time I’d heard him do so, and
found I liked the rich, intriguing sound of it.

His amusement vanished. “The
Alliance mandates that all intersystem travelers must be immunized. You
indicated on your check-in at Marnu Port that you’d received all yours. So that
means we shouldn’t have to worry about you catching anything on Rikin—or
transferring something dangerous to the inhabitants. Correct?”

He was right. I had withstood a
battery of unpleasant inoculations before the Dearleth Port would let me depart
for Harnaru. I nodded and maintained a chilly expression. Matt suppressed a smile,
and one solitary deep dimple briefly appeared near his mouth.

“Perhaps you would be interested to
know that our next port of call will be Sanbourne in the Kaisin System, trader wife
of mine?”

I hoped my expression looked as
unimpressed as I felt.
Why does Interplex
have only five years of data for him?
I wasn’t exactly forthcoming about
revealing my life before Harnaru to him, but at least identity records covering
my life’s entire twenty-eight standard years existed. My identity hadn’t
stopped five years ago, like his.

“Sanbourne is noted for its fine,
exotic flower fragrance extracts.” A half-teasing smile played on his lips as
he watched me before adding, “Perfumers throughout the thirty charted systems
fight viciously with one another to obtain those essences and synthetic
formulations.”

My unblinking stare stayed trained
on him.

“No
interest, doll?” he asked half seriously. “You wish an answer to your first
question still, I see.” He considered me.

I maintained my neutral expression.

“I’ll answer your question upon
Rikin.”

I stared with expectancy, but Matt said
no more. He gently disentangled his arms and limbs from me, and slipped from
the sheet that had come to serve as covering for us both against the cabin’s slight
chill. He moved from the couch and retrieved his garments from the carpeted
deck. I looked upon his well-formed body and manhood, and still couldn’t
understand how he could be dying. There was no obvious physical weakness within
him.

Matt bent and laid a gentle kiss
upon my throat. “I’m headed for a shower and then I’ll hunt up a meal for you.
Stay alert for proximity warnings. If the navilog
comp
peals out an alarm, come get me fast if I’m not here by the end of the first
chime. The alarms can get quite loud, so don’t let it rattle you.”

I liked him as he was now: gentle
and considerate, with quiet amusement lighting the sparks in his dark eyes so
they seemed to dance along with the warm reassurance in his voice. Throwing my
arms about his neck, I unreservedly planted a kiss upon his smiling lips.

Matt laughed and firmly disengaged
my arms, but he held them captive until after he’d plundered my mouth with his
tongue. He ended the kiss with slow reluctance and a teasing smile. “Not content
with merely imprinting yourself upon my awareness, are you, doll? You’ve got to
show your full power over me by continually tempting and seducing me, I see.
There are siren women like you in the Sarnon System who ensnare men unto
themselves like this forever. Are you certain you’re not by chance from that
place?”

In that moment I tumbled over the
precipice into love with Matt Lorins—or whoever he was before he assumed that
name and identity. Something in my softening expression must have shown my
emotional shift and helped him detect the yielding change, because his smile
became sad and then faded.

“Beware the dark places, dear
heart,” he whispered and rose from my side, leaving me chilled without his body’s
comforting heat. He left the cabin before I could speak his name.