The Cowboy Way (3 page)

Beth inhaled. “This reminds me of when I was a kid and I lived in central New York—my parents used to take me to the state fair.”

Jake looked at her with interest, waiting for her to continue.

“I waited all summer for the fair. I couldn't wait to go through the horse barns and look at all the beautiful horses. I'd pick one out and pretend it was mine. Then I'd watch the horse shows and cheer my horse to victory.”

“Now I know where Kevin gets his love of horses.”

Jake smiled, and she could see tiny lines at the corners of his eyes that were white against the dark tan of his face.

She smiled back. “I've always liked horses.” She paused, thinking back. “When Kevin was little, several times during the day he'd hand me a book, crawl up on my lap and ask me to read to him. I read every book with a horse or a pony on the cover a hundred times over. I'd take him to horse shows and rodeos when they were nearby. He just loved going.”

The memories that the barn smells triggered washed over her, all warm and comforting. Those were some of the best times of her life, just Kevin and her, and that's the way she liked it.

Kevin craned his neck as he wheeled down the cement walkway of the barn. He didn't know where to look first. On both sides were stalls, and most of the horses hung their heads over the half-door. On each door was a wooden sign with the horse's name in black print.

“That one there is a beauty,” he said. “Wow! So is that one! And that one!”

Jake was patient with Kevin. As they came to each stall, Kevin had to pet the horse and call it by name.

After a while, Beth caught Jake's eye. “Can I speak with you, Mr. Dixon?”

Nodding, he left Kevin petting a horse and walked over toward her.

“About the horse—”

Jake held a hand up. “I promise you, Kevin's horse will be gentle. All the horses in this barn are hand-picked for Wheelchair Rodeo. I work with them myself. Don't worry.”

“Easy for you to say,” she said. “He's not your son.”

“No, but I'll take care of him as if he were.”

She met his gaze. His blue eyes were as cool and as refreshing as a spring day, and he truly seemed to care about Kevin.

So then why couldn't she let herself trust him completely?

Because she had trusted her son to a man with a drinking problem before, and Kevin was almost killed. And the man had died.

Jake glanced down the long row of horses and shouted, “You might like Cheyenne, Kev, or the black horse in stall three. Check them out.” Then he turned back to Beth and lowered his voice. “Look, I don't know all of what you heard at the airport, but don't pay any attention to it.”

“I heard that you were drunk and hurt a man.”

“I wasn't drunk. I had a few beers, yes. I had some words with someone, and then suddenly we were in the middle of a free-for-all.” Jake sighed and looked away. After several seconds, his gaze returned to her. “Look, Wheelchair Rodeo begins the day after tomorrow, so if you're having second thoughts about trusting me with Kevin, you'd better tell me now.”

She met his direct gaze. “I'm having second thoughts.”

“Fair enough.” He nodded. “Then take him out of the program.”

“It would break his heart,” she said. “You're his hero. He idolizes you.”

“Lady, I'm no one's hero. It's all I can do these days to get up every morning.” He was speaking through gritted teeth. “And I might be a lot of things, but I'm not a drunk.”

That was just what Brad had always said.

Beth swallowed hard and glanced at Kevin to make sure he was out of hearing range. She knew she had angered Jake Dixon, but she had good reasons for not trusting him—or anyone, for that matter—with her son.

Maybe she owed him an explanation. “His father was an alcoholic,” she said. “He picked Kevin up at a friend's birthday party. Brad was drunk and he drove his car into the cement of a bridge. Brad died and Kevin lived. After four operations in two years, Kevin's still in a wheelchair. The doctors don't understand why.”

“Oh…shoot…” He took off his hat and raked his fingers through his hair, then plopped the hat back on his head. “I'm sorry,” he said, watching Kevin. “But now at least I understand why you hate drinking.” He paused. “He'll never get out of the chair?”

He touched her arm when she didn't answer right away. It was an unexpected, comforting gesture. The look on his face was concerned and sympathetic. She wondered yet again if she was judging him too harshly.

She took a deep breath and jumped in. “Kevin's last operation was supposed to work, but obviously it didn't.” When the tears started to sting her eyes, she blinked them back. “He's idolized you since he first met you at the Tucson rodeo. He was five years old. You paid attention to him, listened to him, and you gave him
a red bandana. He's never forgotten that, and one of the things that kept him going was his dream of coming to the Wheelchair Rodeo.”

“I'm honored, but—”

Beth held up an index finger. “Oh, there's much more. Ever since then, he's watched bull riding constantly on TV, looking for you, cheering you on. When he was in the hospital, he fought to stay awake to watch you being interviewed on Letterman during one of his hospital stays. Your fan club sent him a special autographed picture that has never left his sight. He wears your clothes. His room is covered in pictures of Jake Dixon. He thinks you're the greatest thing since school recess.”

Jake met her gaze. “I don't know what to say.”

“You can promise me that you'll be the hero he thinks you are.”

Jake stared down at the floor. “I can't promise that.”

He shifted from foot to foot, and Beth sensed that he wanted to get as far away from her as possible.

“I'm just a cowboy. That's all. I can guarantee you that he'll have a good time at the ranch. I can teach him how to ride and rope and cook over a campfire, but if he needs a hero, he'd best look up to Jimmy Watley or Clint Scully or another cowboy.”

“But it's you he idolizes.”

He shook his head as if he were shaking her words out, and walked toward Kevin, his boots making dull clicking noises on the cement.

She trailed behind him. Nobody's hero? Kevin was only one little boy among thousands who worshiped the ground he walked on. He was the primary reason why
Kevin worked so hard to get better. “Jake Dixon is tough, Mom. I am, too,” Kevin had told her.

She owed Jake Dixon. She owed him a lot.

“Have you picked one out yet?” Jake said to Kevin. “Remember, you have to take care of the horse all week. That means brushing, feeding, watering and taking care of the tack. Got it?”

“I can do it, Jake. I promise!”

“Then who will it be, Kev?” Jake asked.

“Killer.”

Beth closed the distance between them.
“Killer?”

“Actually, his full name is Killer Bee, but we call him Killer for short,” Jake explained.

That didn't make her feel any better. She didn't want Kevin riding on a horse named Killer, even if it was a cute black horse with soulful black eyes.

She would have called him Thunder, like another fictional horse of her childhood she'd discovered in a library book. Her Thunder was a shiny, black horse with four white socks. She read the book over and over again until she just about had it memorized.

She looked over the stall door to see if Killer Bee had white socks. He didn't, but he was still a beautiful horse.

Kevin fidgeted in his chair. “Will you take him out of the stall, Jake? I want to look at him all over.”

“Okay, Kev.”

With Kevin on the edge of his seat, Jake led Killer Bee out of his stall.

The horse sniffed at Kevin's shirt as the boy giggled and reached out to pet him. “Just think,” said Kevin, “he's mine for a week.”

Jake raised an eyebrow, met Beth's eyes and waited for her reply.

She took a deep breath and prayed that she wouldn't regret her decision. Kevin's doctor felt that the horseback riding would be good for him, would strengthen his muscles. That would be wonderful for his broken body, but she knew that the Gold Buckle Ranch experience would do even more for Kevin's morale.

“Yes, Kevin. He's yours while we are here. Make sure you listen to Mr. Dixon—Jake—and learn how to take care of him.”

Jake gave a slight nod, obviously pleased with her decision. “Well, buckaroo, I'd best get you and your mom back to the Trail Boss Cabin so you both can get some rest.”

He put Killer back into his stall. “If I have time tomorrow, we can get a riding lesson in and maybe even a roping lesson. You can get a jump on the rest of the kids.”

“Cool. I brought my
official
Jake Dixon rope with me.”

Jake shrugged. “Huh?”

“I bought it from your
official
Web site for Kevin's ninth birthday,” Beth explained.

“Oh. I forgot about that. My fan club runs the Web site,” he mumbled, then said to Kevin, “I'm sure it's a good rope if you bought it from my
official
Web site.” He grinned.

“Well, it's time we went to bed, cowboy,” Beth said. “It's been a long day.”

Jake did a double-take, raised an eyebrow and
pushed back his hat with a thumb. His eyes twinkled in amusement.

“Kevin,”
she clarified, grinning in spite of herself. It was hard not to like Jake. “It's time for bed,
Kevin.
”

B
eth woke to the scent of pine. A breeze lightly tossed the lace curtains. Sunlight flickered on her face, and she smiled. What a nice way to wake up. But why wake up yet? She turned over, scrunched the pillow to the perfect shape under her head and closed her eyes again.

“That's awesome, Jake.”

Jake.
That name again. She had dreamed of the tall, lean cowboy with the lazy grin and the sexy blue eyes all night. Now she woke up to his name drifting on the breeze.

She even remembered saying the same phrase—
“That's awesome, Jake”
—in her dream when he…when they…

“Totally cool, Jake.”

She had never said
that
in her dream.

“Kevin?” She shot up in bed. “Kevin?”

“Out here, Mom!”

“Where?” She tore out of the bedroom, her heart pounding wildly in her chest. She ran into his bedroom, but he wasn't there. She checked the bathroom. “Kevin?” Barely breathing, she raced to the door and tore it open.

“Hi, Mom!”

Her son was astride a big black horse—Killer Bee. He was belted into some kind of special saddle with a high back and sides. Jake Dixon was standing next to him with reins in his hand. They both were petting the horse and smiling like they hadn't a care in the world.

When she caught something extra in Jake's grin, she realized that she was barefoot on the front porch of the Trail Boss Cabin in her red satin nightgown with spaghetti straps, a buy-one-get-one-free special from WalMart.

She crossed her arms in front of her, sure that Jake could see how cold she actually was.

“Kevin,” she began in her scolding-mom tone.

“Aw…don't be mad at me. I got up early and saw Jake at the corral. We had breakfast in the bunkhouse with all the cowboys. It was so cool, Mom. Joe Watley was there. And Gilbert. And Ty Watson, T.J., and Trace and…”

She held her hand up to stop him from naming every cowboy in the bunkhouse. “You should have asked me, Kevin. Also, I don't think you should be taking up so much of Mr. Dixon's time.”

She studied Jake. He was clean-shaven. She looked for signs of a hangover, but his eyes were bright and clear. He tipped his hat back with a thumb, a gesture
she had seen more than once. It was as if he were saying
“Look me over. I don't care.”

So she looked.

“Kev's not bothering me. I enjoy his company.”

“That may be true, but Kevin shouldn't have left the cabin without letting me know.”

“He said he didn't want to wake you, and that you were snoring up a storm.” Jake chuckled.

“I certainly do not snore!” Beth protested.

“Mom, you were sucking the walls in.”

She couldn't help but laugh. Running a hand through her hair, she realized that it was tangled. In spite of the cold, she felt a warm flush as Jake Dixon's blatant gaze swept over her again.

“Mr. Dixon, may I impose on you to watch Kevin a while longer while I get dressed?”

“Of course. I'm just going to let Kevin walk Killer around the paddock. Take your time.”

“Be careful, Kevin. Nothing fancy, okay? And listen to Mr. Dixon.”

“I will. I will.” His voice had that “quit nagging me” tone to it, but she couldn't help herself. She always worried.

As she was about to go back into the cabin, Emily Dixon turned the corner and waved to her. “Beth, you're just the person I'm looking for.”

“Good morning, Emily.” She slumped over in another attempt to make her nightgown appear longer. “Please come inside. I need to get dressed.”

“Good morning, boys.” She gave Kevin and Jake a wave. Turning back to Beth, she said, “Stay put. I'll make it quick. I need another volunteer for the
overnight campout, a woman to assist the girls in the program. Now, I know you are on vacation, and you need a break from— Well, I wouldn't ask if I wasn't desperate. Can you help us out?”

“Certainly,” she said without hesitation. If she was assisting Wheelchair Rodeo, she could keep an eye on Kevin.

“But, Mrs. Dixon, my mom doesn't know how to ride,” Kevin said. “She won't be able to go on the trail ride and campout.”

“I can take care of teaching your mother how to ride,” Jake said.

His blue eyes sparkled in the morning sun like twin sapphires. She didn't particularly want to be in Jake Dixon's company all that much. In just the short time she'd known him, she was already feeling a pull toward him. And now she was having erotic dreams about him. Why?

He was stirring up feelings that she hadn't known she had, as well as fears about Brad and his drinking that she'd tried to bury, along with her husband.

She saw an amused look on Emily Dixon's face. It was as if she knew that Beth was trying to fight an attraction to Jake.

“Thank you, son.” Emily kissed Jake on the cheek as she walked by him, then she was off down the path that led to the ranch house. “Breakfast is still being served in the mess hall, Beth,” she said over her shoulder as she disappeared around the corner.

Beth was suddenly too nervous to eat. “I'll be ready in a half hour,” she said to Jake. “I guess I should pick out a horse.”

“I'll pick one out for you if you'd like,” Jake said.

She nodded and turned to go into the cabin, then turned back. “Jake? Mr. Dixon?”

“Yes, ma'am?” He waited patiently for her to continue.

She didn't know if she could ask the question she wanted to without sounding like a fool. But what the heck? “Do you have a black horse with four white socks?”

He studied her as if trying to figure out the reason for her request. To his credit, he didn't laugh. “I believe I do.”

Well, she was in this far, she might as well let him think she was completely out of her mind. “Do you have a horse with four white socks named Thunder, by any chance?” she asked.

“Thunder?” He raised an eyebrow.

His eyes met hers. The moment hung between them and then he smiled. A look of gentle understanding crossed his tanned face.

“Yeah. Yes. I do have a horse named Thunder. And he has four white socks.”

She knew he wasn't telling the truth, but the white lie moved him up a couple of notches in her estimation.

“Could I have that horse?” she asked.

“Sure.”

Smiling, she hurried into the cabin and shut the door. Leaning against it, she clamped a hand over her mouth to control the giddiness that bubbled up from somewhere. She felt happy, euphoric, as if she were flying. She released her hand and her laughter overflowed.

Maybe her strange mood was due to her relief that Kevin was okay. Maybe it was because she was going
to ride a horse after all these years. Maybe it was because she got a good night's sleep. But it was not, definitely not, because she had dreamed about Jake all night, then awoken to see him so attentive toward her son.

Kevin would have memories that he'd cherish forever, and she'd always be grateful to Jake Dixon for that.

She was glad that she was going to help out with Wheelchair Rodeo. Since they'd both received a “scholarship” to WR, it gave her the opportunity to contribute something to the program. WR was something special.

 

She rushed to her room, plucked a pair of jeans and a T-shirt out of her suitcase and hurried to the shower.

Twenty minutes later, refreshed and dressed, she stepped out onto the porch of her cabin. She walked toward the barn and saw Jake sitting on the corral fence, waiting for her.

 

Jake felt Beth's gaze on the back of his neck, watching his every move with Kevin. A prickle of irritation shot through him. What did she think he was going to do? Toss the boy, wheelchair and all, into his pickup and hit the honky-tonks?

Finally, with her reluctant permission, he handed Kevin and Killer over to bronc rider K.C. Morris and sent them to the Chisholm Trail, a short, easy walking path that meandered behind the dining hall and the bunkhouse, then circled back to the barn.

That would be enough for Kevin for the day. He was using new muscles, and Jake didn't want to overwhelm
the little guy. Then K.C. could help Kev unsaddle Killer, brush him down and clean the tack.

“There isn't anything K.C. doesn't know about kids or horses,” he reassured Beth. “He comes from a family of nine kids and owns some of the finest horses in Texas.”

That didn't seem to impress her. It was Kevin's hopeful “Please, Mom?” that did it.

Jake felt sorry for the kid. Although he liked the thought that Beth would be helping out on the overnight, she was a bit too overprotective and stifling. He'd bet his last saddle that Kevin needed a break from her.

And she needed to relax.

As Kevin disappeared behind the pines, she bit her nails.

“You're next,” Jake said, jumping down from the fence. He winced from the pain.

“Maybe when Kevin comes back.”

“Beth, Kevin's fine. He's on a short, easy walking trail that we call the Chisolm Trail. I guarantee he's having the time of his life. C'mon, it's your turn. You're going to love the horse I picked out for you.”

He gave a shrill whistle and a horse came trotting over. He watched Beth's face for her reaction. It was just as he'd expected. She broke into a big grin, and he swore she was going to jump right out of her skin.

Sidewinder, with his two white socks, belonged to his friend Dan Montague's son, Danny. Luckily, they'd loaned the gentle horse to Wheelchair Rodeo, along with several others they'd raised on their neighboring spread. Jake had painted two more socks on Sidewinder
with white shoe polish. Beth's bright eyes and grin told him that it was well worth the trouble.

“She's a beauty, Jake. I don't know how to thank you.”

“She's a ‘he.'” He shook his head. “I can see my work is cut out for me!”

“What's his real name?”

“Thunder.”

“No. Really—”

“Thunder,” Jake insisted. “And he's ready for some exercise. Let's go saddle him up.”

Jake opened the corral door for Beth. As Thunder nudged Beth's shirt pocket with his nose, she stepped back laughing.

He took her hand and dropped some sugar cubes onto her palm. “Flat on your hand.”

“I remember.”

His hand skimmed hers, and he felt as if he'd gone eight seconds with Prickly Pear again. When she looked up at him with her glittering green eyes, he felt as if he were free-falling. Sooner or later he knew he'd hit the ground and eat dirt.

Why couldn't he just walk away from Beth Conroy? He understood why he was drawn to her son. He saw the man he used to be in Kevin's adoring eyes—not an over-the-hill, washed-up bull rider who'd been keeping the Justin Sports Medicine Program busy. Hell, Beth was everything he didn't need—overprotective, stifling and bossy.

He didn't know the answer, but he was going to push it out of his mind and concentrate on Wheelchair Rodeo for now. If it killed him, he was going to be on top again.
He'd win his event this Saturday, the Jake Dixon Gold Buckle Challenge. Then he'd pick up the PBR tour in August. He'd win the bull-riding Finals in Vegas in October. Maybe after that, he'd retire. Then again, maybe not.

But if he did, he would retire a winner.

“I'll show you how to saddle and bridle your horse,” Jake said.

 

Beth signaled her muscles to relax and not bunch. A nervous giggle escaped. She tried to cover it with a cough.

“I'd bet my boots that you've never saddled a horse before,” Jake said.

“Hope your socks are clean, because I'm going to win your boots.” She reached up and petted Thunder. “I did saddle a horse—once—many years ago. And I certainly read enough books about it when I was a kid. It's probably like riding a bike. “

“Don't worry. I'm not going to let you do it alone, not the first time—but you'll learn. Just like Kevin will learn. So will the rest of the kids who are cleared to ride. They'll get a lot of help, and they'll do what they can.”

His hands moved to her waist. She jumped. He was only getting her into position, but her heart pumped hard, sending heat through her veins. His touch was harmless, not intimate at all. Yet it had been a long time since a man other than Brad had touched her. Every nerve in her body was humming.

Jake lifted an orange-and-gray blanket that was draped over a metal stand and handed it to her. “Put that on his back. It's made of heavy wool—cushions the horse from saddle sores and absorbs the sweat.”

She took the blanket and placed it on Thunder.

“Now the saddle. It weighs about thirty-five pounds. Can you handle it?”

“Kevin weighs much more than that, and I lift him.”

He felt the muscles in her upper arm and grinned. “I'm impressed. You're a tough lady.”

“I just do what I have to.”

The smile left his face. “It must be difficult for you.”

“He's my son.”

“If you don't mind me saying so, you overprotect him.”

She stared at him until she finally found her voice. “What gives you the right to judge me, Mr. Dixon?”

“I can tell that—”

“Do you have a degree in child psychology?” She picked up the saddle and flung it on Thunder's back. She could have flung Jake Dixon up there, too.

“I see you—”

“Mr. Dixon, what I think you need to do is concentrate on roping and riding the range and doing whatever else a cowboy does. Leave the child rearing to someone who has a child to rear.”

“How do you know I don't have a child? Or a good dozen of them?”

“All your publicity says…” A vein pumped on his temple. She'd hit a nerve.

“Don't believe everything you read,” he snapped. He took a couple of deep breaths and pushed his hat back. “Look, Beth, I didn't mean to upset you. I was only going to say that you need to give the kid and yourself a break.”