The Cowards (10 page)

Just then the door opened and there stood Dr Sabata. My throat tightened from joy. I forgot all about Prema. Dr Sabata was wearing a black suit and he had his pince-nez on his nose. Dr Sabata. This was great. I felt safe immediately. I’d known it all along. Of course. They couldn’t shoot us. That was all a lot of nonsense. I’d known it right from the start. They couldn’t shoot us, now that Dr Sabata was here. Dr Sabata looked at me sadly and said, ‘Mr Smiricky, what in the world have you been doing?’

‘Why, nothing, Doctor. I was at the square and they picked me up,’ I said innocently. Now everything was all right again.

‘You provoked them, didn’t you? And you know what the situation is like. I’d thought we could at least depend on you students to be sensible.’

‘But I really wasn’t doing anything, Doctor.’

‘Look here, Mr Smiricky. We’re negotiating now with the Commander about withdrawing the troops from the town so there won’t be any needless destruction and you students are making things very difficult for us.’

‘I’m really awfully sorry, sir. I really didn’t mean to …’

‘Well, all right, I believe you. Mr Kuelpe promised me he’d release you but I had to give him my word of honour that the townspeople will allow the troops to leave peacefully and take their arms with them.’

I remembered Prema. Jesus! Dr Sabata’s word of honour wouldn’t be worth a damn now. Jesus! All I wanted was to get out of there fast. So I said rapidly, ‘Thank you, Doctor.’

‘Don’t mention it,’ said Dr Sabata. ‘But please tell your
friends not to do anything imprudent. Everything will be arranged. Just be patient.’

‘Yes,’ I said. Mayor Prudivy peeked out of the principal’s office. The Kostelec city fathers were negotiating. I knew it. I could see the revolution was in good hands. Dr Sabata shook hands with me. ‘Thank you, Doctor,’ I said.

He smiled humbly. ‘You’re quite welcome. I’m glad I could help you. Remember me to your father.’

‘Yes, thank you, I will.’

‘Good-bye.’

‘Good-bye.’

I turned around. Lenecek came over to me. Dr Sabata hadn’t shaken hands with Lenecek. But Lenecek didn’t mind. I noticed he wasn’t so pale any more. We hurried down the stairs to the main floor. It was all over and now I could start living again. And it’d certainly make an impression on Irena. And maybe there’ll be shooting anyway. Now all of a sudden I felt like shooting again. Now that nobody was going to stand me up against a wall and shoot at me. I had a terrific urge to start shooting. I ran down the steps in front of the high school and there I was, out in the bright sunshine. I waited for Lenecek.

‘Are you going downtown?’ I asked him.

‘No, I’ve got to go home. My old lady’ll have the shit scared out of her already by now. They’ve probably told her.’

‘Well, I’m going into town,’ I said.

‘Take care of yourself, Mr Smiricky,’ said Lenecek.

‘Well, good-bye,’ I said with a smile and held out my hand. He pressed it and his palm was still wet with fear.

I walked along Rampart Street in the direction of Skocdopole’s warehouse. I saw them as soon as I turned the corner and they looked terrific. Vahar was carrying a flag and the others were clustered around him with Prema in the lead. Prema was holding a submachine gun, all polished and oiled, and he had a leather belt strapped around his waist over his coat with a couple rounds of ammunition in it. Hand-grenade pins stuck out of both pockets. I raised my hand and waved at them. The boys slowed down and stopped.

‘What is it?’ called Prema.

‘They let us go,’ I said and hurried towards them. Vahar set the flag staff down on the ground. The boys stood there and set the butts of their guns down on the pavement. They were pretty well armed. Perlik had two bazookas and Jerry wore hand grenades draped around his neck like a rosary. I saw Prochazka and Vasek Vostal and Benda and Kocandrle. Benda and Vasek had submachine guns and Kocandrle and Prochazka had automatics.

‘Thanks, guys,’ I said.

‘So they let you go, huh?’ said Prema and he sounded almost disappointed.

‘Yeah. That is, Dr Sabata got us out of it.’

‘Sabata was there?’

‘Yeah. With old Prudivy. Maybe there were more of them.’

‘They came there after you?’

‘No. They were there when we got there.’

‘What were they doing?’

‘Probably negotiating with the Germans.’

‘What about, do you know?’

‘Dr Sabata said it was about letting the soldiers get out of town.’

‘Jesus!’ said Prema. That made him mad. ‘What’re those yellow-bellied bastards fouling things up for?’

‘They’re cautious all right. It doesn’t surprise me,’ said Perlik.

‘What’re we going to do?’ asked Benda.

‘Shall we go after ’em?’ said Vahar in a bloodthirsty tone.

‘I don’t think it would make much sense right now,’ I said. ‘Thanks a lot for wanting to help me, but it’d be a pretty risky business now.’

‘When do the Germans plan to pull out? Did Sabata say?’ asked Prema.

‘No. He didn’t say.’

‘If we knew when they were going to pull out we could wait for ’em up on Sugarloaf.’

‘Yeah, but if we don’t know?’ said Benda.

‘It’s simple,’ Vahar said. ‘We’ll keep our eye on ’em, right?’

‘That’s about all we can do,’ said Prema. ‘You don’t know what else they were talking about?’

‘I don’t know. But I guess you know that Sabata and Prudivy and the rest of them have some kind of an organization, don’t you?’

Prema looked at me.

‘We know about it.’

Suddenly I felt hot all over. I’d thought I was going to tell them something new and instead I’d put my foot in it.

‘Are you in contact with them?’ I asked.

‘Well – yes. I guess it’s safe to talk about that now.’

It was embarrassing. I knew Prema was mixed up in something. But he’d never really told me anything and I didn’t want to pump it out of him if he didn’t trust me enough to tell me himself. But now the opportunity had arisen.

‘I want to join,’ I said. ‘Take me with you.’

Prema acted very grave. ‘You want to join?’

‘Yes,’ I said.

Prema’s face took on an expression like one of the Founding Fathers’. He was really pretty naïve. I had different ideas about the revolution than he had. I was more of a gangster, whereas he was a real rebel. But I needed a gun and they certainly had them. This was the easiest way to get one. I knew the boys had been playing partisans for two months already and they must have a regular arsenal by now in Skocdopole’s warehouse. Prema shook my hand. Very touching. But I needed that gun. Mutely, I pressed his hand.

‘All right, then,’ said Prema. ‘We can use everybody except sissies and old maids.’

I blushed. It was like something out of a grade-school primer. But I stopped blushing right away. After all, the main thing was that I’d have a gun. Once the shooting started, there wouldn’t be time for a lot of speeches and sentimentality any more. And then it’d probably be great. Even with these guys in their corduroy pants and stubble-beard faces. Even with all this rebel talk. Rebelling had its appeal for me, too. Again I could just imagine the smoke and the shooting and, in the midst of the smoke, Vahar with the flag. It was good.

‘Well, let’s pack up again, right?’ said Benda.

‘Yep,’ said Prema.

‘Let’s go,’ said Vahar. ‘We going to take it all back to the warehouse?’

‘Yep,’ said Prema. Vahar picked up the flag and the boys slung their rifles over their shoulders. As they turned, I noticed that Vasek and Jerry had submachine guns slung across their backs, too. Apparently they had a surplus of them.

‘Listen,’ I asked Prema. ‘How is it really? Is Sabata running the whole show or what?’

‘Yeah. Sabata’s running it,’ Prema said.

‘And you have things all planned out already?’

‘Well, Sabata’s supposed to give the order over the loudspeaker.’

‘For the uprising?’

‘No. Just for a mobilization.’

‘And when’s the uprising supposed to start?’

‘As soon as Cemelik gives the word.’

‘He’s a colonel, isn’t he?’

‘Yeah.’

I was silent. Then I asked, ‘And … and do you think Sabata’ll start anything?’

Prema shrugged.

‘And are you really going to wait till you get the word?’ I said. I could tell Prema was fed up.

‘I don’t know,’ he said. ‘I’m beginning to have my doubts.’

‘Did anybody tell you to collect all these guns and stuff?’

‘No. We did it on our own,’ he chuckled.

‘Boy,’ I said. ‘I think Sabata’s scared.’

‘I think so, too.’

‘I don’t trust those guys anyway. All they care about is saving their own skins,’ I said.

Prema didn’t say anything for a while. Then he said, ‘We’ve known each other ever since we were kids, so I guess I can trust you, can’t I?’

‘Sure,’ I said.

‘We’re in this together with Sabata. But if he starts fooling around, we’ll take off on our own, see?’

‘Yeah.’

‘Because I know what a bunch of yellow bastards they are, too.’

‘Well, why did you get mixed up with them then?’

‘Sabata has connections with Prague.’

‘I see.’

‘But if he starts something funny, we’ll shit on the whole thing.’

‘Sure,’ I said. ‘And how’s the mobilization going to go?’

‘Aw, that might not be so bad. The loudspeakers are supposed to tell the people to report to the brewery, where they’ll all get guns, and there’ll be instructions, too, I guess.’

‘And you’re going to be in on that, too?’

‘I guess so. But if we don’t like the looks of it, we pull out.’

I didn’t say anything for a while again. I had to get a gun out of Prema somehow.

‘Listen – you think there’ll be anything for me?’

‘What do you mean?’

‘Oh, maybe a submachine gun or something like that.’

‘Sure, don’t worry. We’ve got lots more weapons back at the warehouse.’

‘You’re not saving them for somebody else then?’

‘No. We thought we’d distribute what we couldn’t use once things get started.’

‘Well, thanks.’

We came to the warehouse. The corrugated-iron overhead door was pulled halfway down and Mr Skocdopole stood in front of it. When he saw me, he looked surprised.

‘Well, so you did it, eh boys? How come you didn’t have to shoot?’

‘They let me go. Sabata put in a good word for us,’ I said.

‘Oh, that’s different,’ said Mr Skocdopole. ‘Anyway, it’d still be a bit too early.’

Vahar rolled up the flag and crawled inside. The boys went in after him, one after the other. Prema stayed outside with me. Mr Skocdopole came up to us. He had a black patch on his left eye. He’d lost his eye in Siberia when he was in the Czech Legion.
*

‘Now, just be careful, boys,’ he said. ‘The essential thing is not to do anything rash and to think things through. But when things get rough, don’t get scared.’

‘Wait a minute,’ said Prema. ‘I can use you.’

‘Yeah?’ I said.

‘I’m supposed to meet the Lof kid at Serpon’s place. Know him?’

‘That’s the redhead from Messerschmidt, huh?’

‘That’s the one. He worked in the factory.’

‘Yeah, I know him.’

‘All right, listen. He’s supposed to bring me a report from Black Mountain. Could you go there instead of me?’

‘Sure.’

‘And tell him they’re supposed to come here to the warehouse tomorrow morning. Got that?’

‘Yeah. What time?’

‘Oh, around eight.’

‘Okay.’

‘You’ll go there then, right?’

‘Sure. Have you got any password?’

‘No. Just tell him I sent you. He knows you, doesn’t he?’

‘Sure.’

‘So I can depend on you?’

‘Sure. And listen – I can count on that gun, can’t I?’

‘Naturally. When they announce mobilization, come straight to the warehouse.’

‘Thanks.’

‘That’s all right. And you bring me Lof’s report back to the warehouse too, huh?’

‘You’re going to be here this afternoon?’

‘Yeah. We’ve still got to clean the guns.’

‘I’ll be there. Is that all?’

‘That’s all.’

I gave him my hand. He shook it.

‘Well, cheers.’

‘Cheers, and thanks,’ I said.

‘That’s okay.’

‘Good-bye,’ said Mr Skocdopole.

‘Good-bye,’ I said, and turned.

So I had a gun. But that thing with Lof was a nuisance. Only there wasn’t much I could do about it. One good turn deserves another. I went under the viaduct and headed back towards the square. It was only then that I noticed there were people standing on the opposite sidewalk looking towards the warehouse. And they were watching me, too. It gave me a good feeling. Too bad I hadn’t had a gun when I walked up to the boys. But maybe it looked good that way. As if I was their superior or something. I hurried towards the square, feeling fine, and forgot all about Lof. The sun wasn’t shining any longer because, in the meantime, the sky had grown overcast with rain clouds. They had blown in from the north and covered the sun and soon the whole sky was clouded over. I turned into Jew Street. It was narrow, cobbled, and deserted. Flags hung out from a few of the houses. I looked at my watch. It was already past twelve o’clock and people had probably gone home for lunch. Not even the revolution could interfere with that. I turned the corner and passed the post office on the square. People were already walking around normally again, but the crowds had dispersed. Flags flew from the church and the loan association office and it looked like noon on the 28th of October.
*
The flags gave me a kind of frustrated feeling of emptiness. It seemed to me you could almost smell nice, fat geese roasting in the ovens in all those houses. That was it. Roast goose. You could bet on it. That’s how things go. Fear, cheers, brass bands, speeches, and roast goose with sauerkraut and dumplings. Everything would be the same again. Nothing would ever change. A couple of exciting days and then the same old bowl of oatmeal, stiff and gummy like it always used to be. And belching after lunch. I’d been feeling fine a little while ago, but now all of a sudden I was fed up. At least I had jazz. But even that didn’t help just then. At least I’d be going to Prague, to the university. That didn’t help either. Christ! Irena, at least. Nothing. I felt completely numb, stunned. I felt like I’d gone lame or blind and that I’d never see again, never feel again. Nothing, either pleasant or unpleasant, just this dull monotony of a life without any future. Quick! Look forward to something!
Be glad about something! Love something! Or get furious at something! But nothing happened. I stood at the corner by the post office and I didn’t feel a thing. It was awful. Suddenly my life had no goal whatsoever. All there was to do was to lie down and sleep. But I wouldn’t be able to fall asleep. I was too jittery, too keyed up. Lord, one had to at least have something! At least Irena. I tried to imagine her and I did imagine her, but nothing happened. Nothing but numbness. I’d have to see her in the flesh. Maybe that would help me, at least. Yes. See her and kid around with her. At least that would help. I rushed into the post office. The frosted window was closed. The room was quiet. I went up to the telephone window and knocked. The window slid up and behind it sat the big-nosed girl with bleached hair who alternated with Irena. Irena wasn’t there any more.