The Con (7 page)

I've dreamt about this day, wishing and
hoping Jagger would be the one I'd give my virginity to, and my
wish came true.

When we finish we collapse on the bed
covered in sweat. I cuddle in his arms, comforted by his warm
embrace and the smell of smoke and Jagger's deodorant. He kisses
the top of my head over and over again as one of his fingers trail
up and down my bare arm that's lying flat against his chest. We
don't speak. We don't have to. Both of us know the significance of
what just happened between us.

I don't know when I finally fall asleep, but
I know it happens while Jagger softly hums a beautiful melody in my
ear. When I wake up the next morning I'm alone in the bed.

Jagger is gone.

Chapter Six

Three years later

As I sit inside the gym in my high school
and listen to our class valedictorian give his speech about the
bright futures we all have ahead of us, I can't wait for this
ceremony to be over. Somehow I was able to get through the last
three years at this awful public school without suffering too much
damage, and thankfully I had Leah with me to get me through any
difficulties.

Our graduating class of one hundred and
twelve students fills the floor of the gym as our family and loved
ones sit in the rusty old bleachers to watch us as we transition to
adulthood.

It's all a bunch of crap. Most of us have
lived like adults for a long time now, coming from where we do, so
the speaker's words are just that, words. I look over to my left,
my eyes scanning the faces in the bleachers until I spot my sister,
Pearl, up at the top. After finishing her bachelor’s degree, Pearl
now commutes back and forth to Phoenix as she works on her
doctorate. She wants to be a pediatric doctor and I'm so proud of
her... and I'm also a little envious.

Pearl should be the one we're here
celebrating. She worked her ass off to make enough money to support
us, and then went to school at night. She's actually doing
something with her life, while I'm just biding my time until I
figure out what I want to do next.

I once had dreams and goals ahead of me. I
was attending one of the most prestigious Performing Arts schools
in the country, I was going to be a principal dancer at a dance
company in New York all while attending college and getting a
degree. Now I'm just an average student, graduating from an average
high school, who wastes her free time hanging in the trailer park
with other kids who have no ambition in life.

Next to Pearl is my boyfriend, Dougy. He was
never my first choice, or even someone I thought of as an option in
the boyfriend department. After my night with Jagger I truly
believed I was starting a relationship with him, but that never
happened and I soon found out just how naive I was when it came to
him.

I cried myself to sleep for months after we
slept together, while listening to Fifteen by Taylor Swift.

I started dating Dougy a few months after
Angelo's party. I no longer had dance consuming my life so I
started hanging out with Leah more and the other kids in the
neighborhood. Dougy pursued me, constantly showering me with
attention, while Jagger acted as though I was a diseased animal on
the side of the road that he discarded and never wanted to see
again. He ignored me completely, while I was forced to watch him
flirt with other girls. After some time went by, and a lot of
crying in the privacy of my own room, I finally gave up on Jagger
and gave in to Dougy's attention, agreeing to go out with him and
hoping it would spark some interest or jealousy from Jagger.

Okay, so maybe I didn't completely give up
on the idea of us.

But my plan backfired because Jagger didn't
give a shit about what I did or who I was dating. That night I gave
him my virginity he was probably already planning his next
conquest.

Dougy's dark brown eyes fall on mine and
then he smiles at me, his hand rising to give me a thumb up. He
dressed up for my graduation, wearing a dress shirt and tie. I'm
sure he's as bored as I am. School isn't really his scene. He
barely graduated two years ago and now he works at one of the
warehouses just outside of town. He works hard but earns very
little money in return.

He's a good guy, really, he is. He treats me
well, he's decent in bed, and he's loyal. He may make crude jokes
and ogle other women when I'm around, but he's never strayed. I've
tried to make it work over the years, but as hard as I try, I'm not
in love with him. I don't think love is something a person should
try hard at having happen. It's either there or it's not, and with
Dougy and me it's not there.

I've wanted to break up with him for some
time now, but I chicken out every time an opportunity presents
itself. I think it's because I don't want to break his heart. But
last night I decided that if I want to get serious about my life I
have to start being honest with myself, and everyone in my life. I
have to break up with Dougy.

He's still watching me so I smile back at
him before facing forward to bring my focus back on the ceremony,
but I'm nudged in the ribs from the annoying friend on my
right.

"This is such a snooze fest. I don't see why
we have to sit through this thing. They could have just handed us
our diplomas on the last day of school and then we wouldn't have to
sit here," Leah complains from the seat next to me.

"I think they're trying to prepare us for
the dull adult lives we have ahead of us, Leah."

"Your life may be dull, but my life is going
to be filled with sex, boys, more sex, and more boys. Crying out in
ecstasy from multiple orgasms is anything but dull." I ignore my
sexually adventurous friend and continue to listen to the speaker
in front of us.

Leah's been the closest thing I've had to a
best friend these past three years. Once I stopped going to the
Performing Arts school, Monique and I drifted apart. Leah was there
to pick up the pieces. She listened to me whine for weeks after
Jagger and I slept together. While she tolerates my relationship
with Dougy, she was very happy when I ran over to her trailer last
night and told her I wanted to break up with him.

"What are you thinking about, Ronnie?"

"Nothing. I agree with you about one thing
though, this ceremony is a snooze fest."

"Not the multiple guys and hot, hot
sex?"

"No, Leah."

"Why not? You're going to be single soon.
It's time to taste other flavors out there. You've had vanilla, and
now you need to try cinnamon, mint, and chocolate."

"I'm good, but thanks."

"All right. Well, if you don't want to talk
about sex, I've got some gossip to entertain you. Do you want to
hear it?"

"What's the latest drama in the Evergreen's
now? I swear our trailer park could have its own reality show."

Leah turns her body toward me, not caring at
all that anyone who might look over at us would see that we're not
paying attention to the ceremony.

"Jagger dumped Lola last night."

"What?" I ask shocked, my voice coming out a
lot louder than I wanted it to. I look around the gymnasium to see
if I caused a scene but thankfully no one is looking at me.

"Yeah, I guess Lola went over to Angelo's to
cry on his shoulder after Jagger dumped her, giving him the sob
story. He was all too willing to comfort her, if you know what I
mean." Leah makes an indecent noise and wiggles her eyebrows.

"It won't last," I sigh out. "Jagger will be
back with her by the end of the week."

"Maybe, but even when they're together,
they're not really together. Jagger likes to plant his seed in any
willing woman he can find."

My face goes pale as I stare ahead, trying
not to let her words offend me because a few years ago I was that
willing woman.

Leah's expression changes to remorse. "Oh,
Ronnie, I didn't mean you. You're not an easy lay. You love Jagger
and I know he doesn't look at you like just some piece of ass."

"It's okay, Leah. You were just telling the
truth."

"Yes, but I was also being insensitive. And
you know what? If Jagger was stupid enough to let a catch like you
get away, then his skanky ass doesn't deserve you. You could do a
lot better."

Tilting my head in her direction I smile
weakly. "Thanks, Leah."

The ceremony lasts for another thirty
minutes, they call our names and we walk up to get our diplomas and
then it's over. I've graduated. The whole thing is very
anticlimactic.

Pearl comes over in her cream-colored dress
and black heels, her brown hair in a twist on top of her head.

"I'm proud of you, little sis. You did
it."

"Thanks, Pearl," I say, smiling at her
before embracing her in my arms with a tight hug. Then she's
gone–off to work before starting another week of medical
school.

Now it's just Dougy and me in the
ten-year-old Dodge Dakota he spent all his money on. I left my cap
and gown at the school and am dressed in a black sundress with a
pink floral design and green leaves. Black flats are on my feet
because my ankle is too weak to ever wear heels again. My long red
hair is down and styled in loose curls. The only make-up I'm
wearing is mascara and Chap Stick.

Dougy starts his truck and then loosens the
blue tie around his neck, before pulling it over his head and
tossing it under his seat. He undoes the top two buttons of his
white dress shirt and then with one hand on the wheel and his other
hand on my thigh, he peels out of the high school parking lot and
hits the road.

"What do you want to do, babe?"

That's a good question with so many possible
answers. I want some direction in my life. I want a life plan. I
want to find a career that will make me feel fulfilled. I want to
dance again. I want to be able to break up with Dougy and still
somehow maintain our friendship.

"I don't know," I reply desolately, because
I'm pretty sure Dougy was asking me what I wanted to do today, not
what I want to do with the rest of my life.

His hand drifts up my leg and under my dress
before giving my thigh a squeeze. "I've got to stop at Kellerman's
to talk to Jagger but then we can go out and celebrate."

That's just great. Today's yet another day
I'm forced to see Jagger. Another day he's an asshole to me and
another day a tiny piece of my heart breaks off, never to be
repaired. Why does everyone in this shitty town have to be involved
with Jagger in some way, shape, or form?

"Okay." I really have no other choice but to
go along with him to Kellerman's Auto Shop. Dropping me off at home
first would never be an option.

Several minutes later we pull up to the auto
shop, the parking lot mostly empty. A tow truck, along with
Jagger's car and two other vehicles I don't recognize are parked
near the entrance. We exit Dougy's truck and walk through the front
door of the shop, quickly making our way to the back break room
where a few guys are sitting around a table and focused on a hand
of poker. I recognize Angelo and Ky right away, and next to Ky is
Jagger.

Jagger's long brown hair is pulled back as
he stares intensely at the man across the table from him. I watch
as the other men at the table fold and it's just Jagger and the
large man across from him. Jagger has a large stack of chips in
front of him, more chips than anyone else at the table and the room
is silent.

I'm not sure what happens next, mostly
because I'm shit at poker, but they lay their cards out and Jagger
takes all the chips in the center of the table.

Dougy breaks the silence in the room.
"Jagger, you got a second?"

"I'll be right there," he replies, his eyes
never leaving his opponent at the table. "I'm out, boys. Time to
pay up."

Dougy takes my hand in his and I follow him
out of the room and through the shop until we're outside again,
never looking back to see if Jagger follows us. Pulling my hand out
of his grip, he turns around to face me and it's just the two of us
outside.

"I thought you needed to talk to Jagger?" I
ask, confused on why we're leaving.

"I do. We'll wait for him here, babe." His
hands dig into the pockets of his Dickies as we wait out in the
heat. It's a Sunday so the shop is closed for the day, but the air
was on inside so I really wish we could have enjoyed it for a few
more minutes.

The chime on the front door goes off and I
glance up to see Jagger stroll outside. He's in his regular attire
of jeans and a basic t-shirt, and it's like I'm fifteen all over
again and the butterflies that have erupted in my stomach have
flown south, awakening the pulse between my legs.

His eyes wander over my body in what I'm
sure is an innocent appraisal, and I stand up straighter, arching
my back to stand more confidently under his watchful eye. When his
beautifully distinctive eyes land on mine, the smoldering glare he
gives me makes my nipples harden, my breasts heavy with lust. I rub
my thighs together to stop the tingling sensation stirring
below.

How is he able to do this to me with just
one look?

He stands in front of Dougy so confidently.
His arms crossed in front of his chest showcasing his lean biceps.
He still smokes because there's a cigarette tucked behind his ear.
He looks over at Dougy before looking back at me, but it's like
he's looking right through me now, no longer letting the
electricity between us get in the way.

It's not fair. He gets me all wound up just
by being here and looking at me the way he does, but then he turns
it off, and I'm left having to deal with the state he's left my
body in–taking care of it at home with my vibrator.

"What's up, Thirty-D?" He's concentrating on
Dougy now.

"I've a–" Dougy looks over at me before
continuing. "Ronnie, go wait in the truck while I talk to
Jagger."