The Complete Tommy & Tuppence Collection (138 page)

‘Morning, missus,' said Clarence. ‘Come to see if I could be any help.'

‘Well,' said Tuppence, ‘of course we do want help in the garden. I believe you used to help Isaac at one time.'

‘Ah well, now and again I did. Not that I know very much. Don't say that Isaac knew much neither. Lot of talk with him, lot of talking saying what a wonderful time he used to have. What a wonderful time it was for the people who employed him. Yes, he used to say he was the head gardener to Mr Bolingo. You know, as lives farther along the river. Great big house. Yes, it's turned into a school now. Head gardener there, he said he used to be. But my grandmother says there isn't a word of truth in that.'

‘Well, never mind,' said Tuppence. ‘Actually, I wanted to turn a few more things out of that little greenhouse place.'

‘What d'you mean the shed, the glass shed? KK, isn't it?'

‘Quite right,' said Tuppence. ‘Fancy your knowing the proper name of it.'

‘Oh well, it was always used to be called that. Everybody says so. They say it's Japanese. I don't know if that's true.'

‘Come on,' said Tuppence. ‘Let's go there.'

A procession formed consisting of Tommy, Tuppence, Hannibal, the dog, with Albert abandoning the washing up of breakfast for something more interesting bringing up the rear. Hannibal displayed a great deal of pleasure after attending to all the useful smells in the neighbourhood. He rejoined them at the door of KK and sniffed in an interested manner.

‘Hullo, Hannibal,' said Tuppence, ‘are you going to help us? You tell us something.'

‘What kind of a dog is he?' asked Clarence. ‘Somebody said as he is the kind of dog they used to keep for rats. Is that so?'

‘Yes, that's quite true,' said Tommy. ‘He's a Manchester Terrier, an old English Black and Tan.'

Hannibal, knowing he was being talked about, turned his head, waggled his body, beat his tail with a good
deal of exuberance. He then sat down and looked proud of himself.

‘He bites, doesn't he?' said Clarence. ‘Everyone says so.'

‘He's a very good guard dog,' said Tuppence. ‘He looks after me.'

‘That's quite right. When I'm away he looks after you,' said Tommy.

‘The postman said he nearly got bitten four days age.'

‘Dogs are rather like that with postmen,' said Tuppence. ‘Do you know where the key of KK is?'

‘I do,' said Clarence. ‘Hanging up in the shed. You know, the shed where the flower-pots are.'

He went off and returned shortly with the once rusty but now more or less oiled key.

‘Been oiling this key, Isaac must have,' he said.

‘Yes, it wouldn't turn very easily before,' said Tuppence.

The door was opened.

The Cambridge china stool with the swan wreathed round it was looking rather handsome. Obviously Isaac had polished it up and washed it, with the idea of transferring it to the veranda when the weather was suitable for sitting out.

‘Ought to be a dark blue one too,' said Clarence. ‘Isaac used to say Oxford and Cambridge.'

‘Is that true?'

‘Yes. Dark blue Oxford and pale blue Cambridge. Oh, and Oxford was the one that smashed, was it?'

‘Yes. Rather like the boat race, isn't it?'

‘By the way, something's happened to that rocking-horse, hasn't it? There's a lot of mess about in KK.'

‘Yes.'

‘Funny name like Matilda, hasn't she?'

‘Yes. She had to have an operation,' said Tuppence.

Clarence seemed to think this very amusing. He laughed heartily.

‘My Great-Aunt Edith had to have an operation,' he said. ‘Took out part of her inside but she got well.'

He sounded slightly disappointed.

‘I suppose there's no real way of getting inside these things,' said Tuppence.

‘Well, I suppose you can smash them like the dark blue one was smashed.'

‘Yes. There's no other way, is there? Funny those sort of S-kind of slits around the top. Why, you could post things in there, couldn't you, like a post box.'

‘Yes,' said Tommy, ‘one could. It's an interesting idea. Very interesting, Clarence,' he said kindly.

Clarence looked pleased.

‘You can unscrew 'em, you know,' he said.

‘Unscrew them, can you?' said Tuppence. ‘Who told you that?'

‘Isaac. I've seen 'im do it often. You turn them upside down and then you begin to swing the top round. It's stiff sometimes. You pour a little oil round all the cracks and when it's soaked in a bit you can turn it round.' ‘Oh.'

‘The easiest way is to put it upside down.'

‘Everything here always seems to have to be turned upside down,' said Tuppence. ‘We had to do that to Mathilde before we could operate.'

For the moment Cambridge seemed to be entirely obstreperous, when quite suddenly the china began to revolve and very shortly afterwards they managed to unscrew it completely and lift it off.

‘Lot of rubbish in here, I should think,' said Clarence.

Hannibal came to assist. He was a dog who liked helping in anything that was going on. Nothing, he thought, was complete unless he took a hand or a paw in it. But with him it was usually a nose in the investigation. He stuck his nose down, growled gently, retired an inch or two and sat down.

‘Doesn't like it much, does he?' said Tuppence, and looked down into the somewhat unpleasant mass inside.

‘Ow!' said Clarence.

‘What's the matter?'

‘Scratched myself. There's something hanging down
from a nail on the side here. I don't know if it's a nail or what it is. It's something. Ow!'

‘Wuff, wuff!' said Hannibal, joining in.

‘There's something hung on a nail just inside. Yes, I've got it. No, it's slipping. Yes, here I am. I've got it.'

Clarence lifted out a dark tarpaulin package.

Hannibal came and sat at Tuppence's feet. He growled.

‘What's the matter, Hannibal?' said Tuppence.

Hannibal growled again. Tuppence bent down and smoothed the top of his head and ears.

‘What's the matter, Hannibal?' said Tuppence. ‘Did you want Oxford to win and now Cambridge have won, you see. Do you remember,' said Tuppence to Tommy, ‘how we let him watch the boat race once on television?'

‘Yes,' said Tommy, ‘he got very angry towards the end and started barking so that we couldn't hear anything at all.'

‘Well, we could still see things,' said Tuppence, ‘that was something. But if you remember, he didn't like Cambridge winning.'

‘Obviously,' said Tommy, ‘he studied at the Oxford Dogs' University.'

Hannibal left Tuppence and came to Tommy and wagged his tail appreciatively.

‘He likes your saying that,' said Tuppence, ‘it must be true. I myself,' she added, ‘think he has been educated at the Dogs' Open University.'

‘What were his principal studies there?' asked Tommy, laughing.

‘Bone disposal.'

‘You know what he's like.'

‘Yes, I know,' said Tuppence. ‘Very unwisely, you know, Albert gave him the whole bone of a leg of mutton once. First of all I found him in the drawing-room putting it under a cushion, then I forced him out through the garden door and shut it. And I looked out of the window and he went into the flower-bed where I'd got gladioli, and buried it very carefully there. He's very tidy with his bones, you know. He never tries to eat them. He always puts them away for a rainy day.'

‘Does he ever dig them up again?' asked Clarence, assisting on this point of dog lore.

‘I think so,' said Tuppence. ‘Sometimes when they're very, very old and would have been better if they had been left buried.'

‘Our dog doesn't like dog biscuits,' said Clarence.

‘He leaves them on the plate, I suppose,' said Tuppence, ‘and eats the meat first.'

‘He likes sponge cake, though, our dog does,' said Clarence.'

Hannibal sniffed at the trophy just disinterred from the inside of Cambridge. He wheeled round suddenly then and barked.

‘See if there's anyone outside,' said Tuppence. ‘It might be a gardener. Somebody told me the other day, Mrs Herring, I think it was, that she knew of an elderly man who'd been a very good gardener in his time and who did jobbing.'

Tommy opened the door and went outside. Hannibal accompanied him.

‘Nobody here,' said Tommy.

Hannibal barked. First he growled again, then he barked and barked more loudly.

‘He thinks there's someone or something in that great clump of pampas grass,' said Tommy. ‘Perhaps someone is un-burying one of his bones there. Perhaps there's a rabbit there. Hannibal's very stupid about rabbits. He needs an awful lot of encouragement before he'll chase a rabbit. He seems to have a kindly feeling about them. He goes after pigeons and large birds. Fortunately he never catches them.'

Hannibal was now sniffing round the pampas grass, first growling, after which he began to bark loudly. At intervals he turned his head towards Tommy.

‘I expect there's a cat in there,' said Tommy. ‘You know what he's like when he thinks a cat is around. There's the big black cat that comes round here and
the little one. The one that we call the Kitty-cat.'

‘That's the one that's always getting into the house,' said Tuppence. ‘It seems to get through the smallest chinks. Oh, do stop, Hannibal. Come back.'

Hannibal heard and turned his head. He was expressing a very high degree of fierceness. He gave Tuppence a look, went back a little way, then turned his attention once more to the clump of pampas grass and began barking furiously.

‘There's something worries him,' said Tommy. ‘Come on, Hannibal.'

Hannibal shook himself, shook his head, looked at Tommy, looked at Tuppence and made a prancing attack on the pampas grass, barking loudly.

There was a sudden sound. Two sharp explosions.

‘Good Lord, somebody must be shooting rabbits,' exclaimed Tuppence.

‘Get back. Get back inside KK, Tuppence,' said Tommy.

Something flew past his ear. Hannibal, now fully alerted, was racing round and round the pampas grass. Tommy ran after him.

‘He's chasing someone now,' he said. ‘He's chasing someone down the hill. He's running like mad.'

‘Who was it–what was it?' said Tuppence.

‘You all right, Tuppence?'

‘No, I'm not quite all right,' said Tuppence.
‘Something–something, I think, hit me here, just below the shoulder. Was it–what was it?'

‘It was someone shooting at us. Someone who was hidden inside that pampas grass.'

‘Someone who was watching what we were doing,' said Tuppence. ‘Do you think that's it, perhaps?'

‘I expect it's them Irish,' said Clarence hopefully. ‘The IRA. You know. They've been trying to blow this place up.'

‘I don't think it's of any political significance,' said Tuppence.

‘Come into the house,' said Tommy. ‘Come quickly. Come on, Clarence, you'd better come too.'

‘You don't think your dog will bite me?' said Clarence uncertainly.

‘No,' said Tommy. ‘I think he is busy for the moment.'

They had just turned the corner into the garden door when Hannibal reappeared suddenly. He came racing up the hill very out of breath. He spoke to Tommy in the way a dog does speak. He came up to him, shook himself, put a paw on Tommy's trouser leg and tried to pull him in the direction from which he had just come.

‘He wants me to go with him after whoever the man was,' said Tommy.

‘Well, you're not to,' said Tuppence. ‘If there's anyone there with a rifle or a pistol or something that
shoots, I'm not going to have you shot. Not at your age. Who would look after me if anything happened to you? Come on, let's get indoors.'

They went into the house quickly. Tommy went out into the hall and spoke on the telephone.

‘What are you doing?' said Tuppence.

‘Telephoning the police,' said Tommy. ‘Can't let anything like this pass. They may get on to someone if we're in time.'

‘I think,' said Tuppence, ‘that I want something put on my shoulder. This blood is ruining my best jumper.'

‘Never mind your jumper,' said Tommy.

Albert appeared at that moment with a complete service of first aid.

‘Well I never,' said Albert. ‘You mean some dirty guy has shot at the missus? Whatever's happening next in this country?'

‘You don't think you ought to go to the hospital, do you?'

‘No, I don't,' said Tuppence. ‘I'm quite all right but I want an outsize Band-Aid or something to stick on here. Put on something like friar's balsam first.'

‘I've got some iodine.'

‘I don't want iodine. It stings. Besides, they say now in hospitals that it isn't the right thing to put on.'

‘I thought friar's balsam was something you breathed in out of an inhaler,' said Albert hopefully.

‘That's one use,' said Tuppence, ‘but it's very good to put on slight scratches or scars or if children cut themselves or anything like that. Have you got the thing all right?'

‘What thing, what do you mean, Tuppence?'

‘The thing we just got out of the Cambridge Lohengrin. That's what I mean. The thing that was hanging on a nail. Perhaps it's something important, you know. They saw us. And so if they tried to kill us–and tried to get whatever it was–that really would be something!'

Tommy sat with the police inspector in his office. The police officer, Inspector Norris, was nodding his head gently.

‘I hope with any luck we may get results, Mr Beresford,' he said. ‘Dr Crossfield, you say, is attending to your wife.'

‘Yes,' said Tommy, ‘it isn't serious, I gather. It was just grazing by a bullet and it bled a good deal, but she's going to be all right, I think. There's nothing really dangerous, Dr Crossfield said.'

‘She's not very young, though, I suppose,' said Inspector Norris.

‘She's over seventy,' said Tommy. ‘We're both of us getting on, you know.'

‘Yes, yes. Quite so,' said Inspector Norris. ‘I've heard a good deal about her locally, you know, since you came here to live. People have taken to her in a big
way. We've heard about her various activities. And about yours.'

‘Oh, dear,' said Tommy.

‘Can't live down your record, you know, whatever it is. Good or bad,' said Inspector Norris in a kindly voice. ‘You can't live down a record if you're a criminal and you can't live down your record if you've been a hero either. Of one thing I can assure you. We'll do all we can to clear things up. You can't describe whoever it was, I suppose?'

‘No,' said Tommy. ‘When I saw him he was running with our dog after him. I should say he was not very old. He ran easily, I mean.'

‘Difficult age round about fourteen, fifteen onwards.'

‘It was someone older than that,' said Tommy.

‘Not had any telephone calls or letters, demands for money or anything like that?' said the Inspector. ‘Asking you to get out of your house, maybe?'

‘No,' said Tommy, ‘nothing like that.'

‘And you've been here–how long?'

Tommy told him.

‘Hmmm. Not very long. You go to London, I gather, most days of the week.'

‘Yes,' said Tommy. ‘If you want particulars–'

‘No,' said Inspector Norris, ‘no. No, I don't need any particulars. The only thing I should suggest is that–well, you don't go away too often. If you can
manage to stay at home and look after Mrs Beresford yourself…'

‘I thought of doing that anyway,' said Tommy. ‘I think this is a good excuse for my not turning up always at the various appointments I've got in London.'

‘Well, we'll do all we can to keep an eye on things, and if we could get hold of this whoever it is…'

‘Do you feel–perhaps I oughtn't to ask this–' said Tommy–‘do you feel you know who it is? Do you know his name or his reasons?'

‘Well, we know a good many things about some of the chaps around here. More than they think we know very often. Sometimes we don't make it apparent how much we do know because that's the best way to get at them in the end. You find out then who they're mixed up with, who's paying them for some of the things they do, or whether they thought of it themselves out of their own heads. But I think–well, I think somehow that this isn't one of our locals, as you might say.'

‘Why do you think that?' asked Tommy.

‘Ah. Well, one hears things, you know. One gets information from various headquarters elsewhere.'

Tommy and the Inspector looked at each other. For about five minutes neither of them spoke. They were just looking.

‘Well,' said Tommy, ‘I–I see. Yes. Perhaps I see.'

‘If I may say one thing,' said Inspector Norris.

‘Yes?' said Tommy, looking rather doubtful.

‘This garden of yours. You want a bit of help in it, I understand.'

‘Our gardener was killed, as you probably know.'

‘Yes, I know all about that. Old Isaac Bodlicott, wasn't it? Fine old chap. Told tall stories now and then about the wonderful things he'd done in his time. But he was a well-known character and a fellow you could trust, too.'

‘I can't imagine why he was killed or who killed him,' said Tommy. ‘Nobody seems to have had any idea or to have found out.'

‘You mean
we
haven't found out. Well, these things take a little time, you know. It doesn't come out at the time the inquest's on, and the Coroner sums up and says “Murder by some person unknown.” That's only the beginning sometimes. Well, what I was going to say was it's likely someone may come and ask you whether you'd like a chap to come and do a bit of jobbing gardening for you. He'll come along and say that he could come two or three days a week. Perhaps more. He'll tell you, for reference, that he worked for some years for Mr Solomon. You'll remember that name, will you?'

‘Mr Solomon,' said Tommy.

There seemed to be something like a twinkle for a moment in Inspector Norris's eye.

‘Yes, he's dead, of course. Mr Solomon, I mean. But he
did
live here and he
did
employ several different jobbing gardeners. I'm not quite sure what name this chap will give you. We'll say I don't quite remember it. It might be one of several–it's likely to be Crispin, I think. Between thirty and fifty or so, and he worked for Mr Solomon. If anyone comes along and says he can do some jobbing gardening for you and
doesn't
mention Mr Solomon, in that case, I wouldn't accept him. That's just a word of warning.'

‘I see,' said Tommy. ‘Yes, I see. At least, I hope I see the point.'

‘That's the point,' said Inspector Norris. ‘You're quick on the uptake, Mr Beresford. Well, I suppose you've had to be quite often in your activities. Nothing more you want to know that we could tell you?'

‘I don't think so,' said Tommy. ‘I wouldn't know what to ask.'

‘We shall be making enquiries, not necessarily round here, you know. I may be in London or other parts looking round. We all help to look round. Well, you'd know that, wouldn't you?'

‘I want to try and keep Tuppence–keep my wife from getting herself too mixed up in things because–but it's difficult.'

‘Women are always difficult,' said Inspector Norris.

Tommy repeated that remark later as he sat by
Tuppence's bedside and watched her eating grapes.

‘Do you really eat all the pips of grapes?'

‘Usually,' said Tuppence. ‘It takes so much time getting them out, doesn't it? I don't think they hurt you.'

‘Well, if they haven't hurt you by now, and you've been doing it all your life, I shouldn't think they would,' said Tommy.

‘What did the police say?'

‘Exactly what we thought they would say.'

‘Do they know who it's likely to have been?'

‘They say they don't think it's local.'

‘Who did you see? Inspector Watson his name is, isn't it?'

‘No. This was an Inspector Norris.'

‘Oh, that's one I don't know. What else did he say?'

‘He said women were always very difficult to restrain.'

‘Really!' said Tuppence. ‘Did he know you were coming back to tell me that?'

‘Possibly not,' said Tommy. He got up. ‘I must put in a telephone call or two to London. I'm not going up for a day or two.'

‘You can go up all right. I'm quite safe here! There's Albert looking after me and all the rest of it. Dr Crossfield has been terribly kind and rather like a sort of broody hen watching over me.'

‘I'll have to go out to get things for Albert. Anything you want?'

‘Yes,' said Tuppence, ‘you might bring me back a melon. I'm feeling very inclined to fruit. Nothing but fruit.'

‘All right,' said Tommy.

II

Tommy rang up a London number.

‘Colonel Pikeaway?'

‘Yes. Hullo. Ah, it's you, Thomas Beresford, is it?'

‘Ah, you recognized my voice. I wanted to tell you that–'

‘Something about Tuppence. I've heard it all,' said Colonel Pikeaway. ‘No need to talk. Stay where you are for the next day or two or a week. Don't come up to London. Report anything that happens.'

‘There may be some things which we ought to bring to you.'

‘Well, hang on to them for the moment. Tell Tuppence to invent a place to hide them until then.'

‘She's good at that sort of thing. Like our dog. He hides bones in the garden.'

‘I hear he chased the man who shot at you both, and saw him off the place–'

‘You seem to know all about it.'

‘We always know things here,' said Colonel Pikeaway.

‘Our dog managed to get a snap at him and came back with a sample of his trousers in his mouth.'