The Commitment (The Unrestrained #2) (9 page)

"There you are, sweetie. Come give your old man a kiss," he said, apparently indifferent to what those on the call would think of his daughter barging in on their meeting.

"Sorry, Daddy," I said and obeyed, kissing his cheek. I smiled at the screen and then ducked out of the view of the webcam. "I'll leave you to your call."

He smiled at me and turned back to the screen.

I tiptoed out and went to the kitchen to fix a cup of hot tea. I was feeling a bit under the weather from the Malarone, the anti-malaria med I was taking, a bit achy and cold. A nice cup of tea would do me wonders. After the kettle boiled, I poured the water over the loose tea leaves and waited for the tea to steep. As I did, I glanced out the kitchen window at the streets below the apartment.

Of course, my mind went back to Dawn and her warning about Drake. Being alone with Drake in Africa had never made me nervous. I'd seen him at work, I'd seen him at play, I'd seen him in social situations and I had been alone with him, tied up and helpless in his apartment on 8
^th
Avenue. I trusted him completely.

It was Dawn I couldn't trust. What she witnessed as a child made her so obsessed with my relationship with Drake, so unwilling to see my point of view. Why couldn't she understand that there was a difference between real abuse and sexual role-playing that was consensual?

I had to get to the bottom of it so I took out my phone and texted her.

Dawn, please meet with me for coffee so we can try to hash out this disagreement between us before I go. We've been friends for so long, you're like the sister I never had. I can't stand that this has come between us.

I sent the text and put my phone in the pocket of my hoodie. I took my tea to the den, where I lay on my favorite overstuffed sofa with a fuzzy throw covering me. The gas fireplace gave off warmth that helped take away the chill that had descended over me.

I switched on the television and flipped between channels searching for something to watch beside the news, waiting for her response. I started watching a movie on PBS – a British period piece on Keats – when my iPhone dinged, indicating I had an incoming text. It was from Dawn.

Let's meet at the coffee shop in Harlem General. I'm on shift all evening, but I can meet you for half an hour before work. But I'm warning you - there's nothing you can say that will make me OK with this thing between you and Morgan. I've been talking with people on FetLife and Kate, these people are sick. Drake's dangerous. I told you that in the pub, and I'll keep saying it. Don't let his pretty exterior and suave ways fool you. He's got a mean streak, as Sunita could tell you.

What? I texted her right back.

It was precisely because Drake didn’t have a 'mean streak' that they broke up. She wanted edge play and for Drake to flog her and cane her and he's not into pain. Dawn, why can't you understand? He's not into pain.
Period
.

I waited, sitting up straight, my back stiff. Just texting her made me upset. I wasn't looking forward to actually meeting with her.

Whatever he told you, he did flog her and hit her with a cane. I don't know what he told you about edge play, but Sunita said
he
wanted to do it and she didn't and that's why they broke up. You shouldn't be so quick to trust complete strangers while ignoring your best and oldest friend. If you want to meet with her and talk, hear her side of the story, she'd be willing to meet with you. She left the lifestyle and is now looking for a normal relationship.

I sat up and tried to gain control over my emotions. How could two people tell such a completely different story? Sunita had left the world of BDSM?

Drake had never given me any reason to doubt him. At that point, I wasn't feeling much like going out again, but I had to meet her and try to make her understand. Since the night I saw her after Drake and I fell at 8
^th
Avenue, hitting my head and injuring his arm, Dawn and I hadn't seen each other. As much as Drake made me happy, and despite how much she angered me, I felt this hole in my heart because of my break with Dawn. I had to either resolve things with her or tell her goodbye.

I sighed and texted her back.

I'll meet you before your shift. Try to keep an open mind and consider our friendship. If you really are my friend, you'll accept this no matter what your misgivings are and wish me well, not try to ruin it.

I reached into my bag and found my bottle of Extra-strength Tylenol, took two, and drank the rest of my tea, hoping the pain medication would take away the aches from the Malarone.

Drake arrived back at my father's apartment a while later, waking me up from a nap. He had taken his coat off and was unbuttoning his jacket as he stood over me.

"Sorry to wake you. I tried to be quiet." He reached into a pocket in his jacket and pulled out a silver keychain with two keys. "These are for you. One's for the front door in case the concierge is off, and the other is for the apartment."

"Chelsea?"

He nodded. "There may be days I can't be there before you. Besides, I like it when you wait for me."

I took the keychain and examined it for a moment. The chain had a silver pendant at the end with a K engraved on it.

"Thank you." I slipped the keychain onto the coffee table and stretched, watching him as he removed his jacket, leaving him in his suit pants and crisp white shirt and black tie. He looked amazing, as usual. "I was a bit under the weather earlier. I think it's the Malarone I had this morning."

He sat on the side of the couch and then bent down and kissed my forehead as if taking my temperature.

"Did you take some Tylenol?"

I nodded.

"Feeling better?"

I nodded. Then, he bent back down and kissed me, his mouth covering mine possessively. Of course, the touch of his lips on mine sent a thrill through my body.

"Mmm, I love it when you're all warm and sleepy," he said, smiling. He ran his fingers over the swell of my breast above my sweater. "I want to ravish you every time I see you after we've been apart."

I smiled back as he leaned down, his face nuzzling the crook of my neck. "I feel the same way. Except I want you to do the ravishing."

"That's my little subbie." Then, his lips followed his fingers, traveling down my neck to my collar, and then over it to my chest. He unfastened the top button of my sweater and pulled down the fabric of my bra to expose one nipple. When he closed his lips around it, his tongue warm against my flesh, I gasped.

"I think I want you in your bedroom," he said, a gleam in his eye.

"Drake, my
father
…"

"Shh," he said. "Your father's old enough to know not to enter your bedroom in the middle of the day when both of us are home and nowhere to be found.
Relax
… He's probably in the middle of one of his meetings and isn’t likely to come in anytime soon. Where's Elaine?"

"She's out for the day. I have to talk to you about something."

"Later." Then, he silenced me, kissing me forcefully. "Submit,
Katherine
."

I tried to give in, letting him bare both my breasts, his mouth moving between my nipples, giving each one equal attention. It sent little jolts of lust through me, but at the same time, I kept my eyes riveted on the doorway in case my father came in. Finally, Drake  returned my bra to its proper position and helped me up. I could see his erection straining against the fabric of his suit pants, and the sight of it made me even more aroused.

I took in a deep breath and let Drake lead me out of the den and down the hallway to my bedroom. We passed my father's office but he was deep in conversation with his advisors and didn't notice us. Drake pushed me ahead of him into my bedroom and closed the door behind him. Then, he pushed me up against the door, pressing his erection against me.

"I need you,
Katherine
. I've been imagining fucking you all day."

I sighed as he kissed my neck, one of his hands restraining mine above my head. I said nothing in reply, trying to let things happen the way he planned and wanted. I knew that no matter what he did, I'd enjoy it. He kissed me deeply, his tongue finding mine, his breathing deep.

Drake was a force of nature to me. I couldn't resist him when he set his mind to seducing me, and I didn't want to. He picked me up, carrying me over to the bed. I smiled into his neck, because it was Drake's thing – picking me up and carrying me to the bed.

He caught my eye. "What are you smiling at? You should be all weak-kneed by now, not amused…"

"You like to carry me," I said, threading my arms around his neck.

He grinned. "Imagine that I'm a conquering warlord, and you're my spoils of war. What would you do?"

"You want to role play?" I said, amused at this turn of events.

"Why not? It would be fun."

"If you were a real conquering warlord, I'd have to resist you," I said, all breathless.

"I like what turns
you
on," he said, a wicked smile on his face. "A little resistance would only add to the excitement."

I blinked as he stood there beside the bed, holding me, his gaze on my face.

"I'm not sure. I didn’t like it when…" I said, remembering the disastrous relationship with Kurt and how it scared me to even think of mock rape.

"
Shh
," he said. "Do you trust me?"

I looked in his blue-blue eyes. I
did
trust him. At least, I wanted to. "Yes."

Then, he kissed me, silencing me once more. When he pulled back, his eyes burned into mine.

"Sometimes, it's the things that scare us the most that excite us the most as well," he said and sat on the side of the bed, with me lying across his lap. "Trust makes all the difference, Katherine. All you need to know is that you'll get fucked hard, fast and a bit roughly, with no preliminaries. I'll let you know which day it will be, but you'll have no idea when. I suspect that the anticipation will make you so wet, you'll probably come very quickly, although I won't do a thing to help."

"Dawn would freak if she thought—"

He held a finger to my lips. "
Shh
," he said, frowning. "Forget what Dawn thinks. She doesn't understand and probably never will so you shouldn't waste time trying to convince her. What do
you
think?" He paused for a moment, his gaze moving over my face. "Kate, does the prospect of me taking you by force, a bit roughly, without thought to your own desires or pleasure – does that excite you in any way?"

I took in a breath and held it, my mind so conflicted. If I was being truthful, it
did
excite me, but only because it was Drake. I could never imagine being forced by anyone I didn't love the way I loved Drake, and it would only be because I would want to feel his desire for me, his need for me as something completely distinct from my own desires. It's what I wanted him to do but which he never had.

"Yes."

He nodded. "I'm safe. You can try things with me that you could only fantasize about. If I do the things that scare you, you can experience them without being hurt or truly scared. Role-playing is fun, especially when I know it will push your buttons." He slid his hand between my legs. "And it’s your sweet little tasty little buttons I want to push, and eat, and suck…"

I tried, but couldn't stop thinking about Dawn, especially after my texts with her earlier.

"I'm meeting with Dawn later to try to sort things with her."

He closed his eyes and exhaled. "
Kate
…" When he opened his eyes, I could see frustration in them and disapproval in the tightness to his mouth. "Why? You're wasting your time and hers, and probably messing things up between us." He snuggled me more closely, his face inches from mine, his expression earnest.

"Kate, you have to make a choice between your own happiness and pleasing others. Are you going to try things that excite and fulfill you or are you going to settle with less in order to please the people who don't really matter? Whatever you want, Kate, whatever you need, I want to give to you."

"I want
you
. I want you to do what you think I need, whatever that is. You've been right so far."

Then he kissed me, his kiss soft. "Thank you for admitting that. Don't waste your life trying to live to please others. Do what makes
you
happy," he said and sighed. "Life's too short. People die."

I nodded, thinking of my mother and his father. Drake's brother. He kissed me again.

"Think of a scenario that arouses you. I'll do whatever it takes to make it happen the way you want, the way you fantasize."

This was all making me feel very conflicted, I tried to change the subject. "What do
you
fantasize about?"

"Kate of a million questions." He shook his head and cupped my cheek, stroking my skin with a thumb. "I fantasize about you letting me fuck you any way I want, any time I want, anywhere I want and making you cry out my name in pleasure." He smiled and kissed me, his fingers threading through my hair. "Right now, I want you to stop with the questions and let me
fuck
you,
Katherine
..."

I bit my lip and tried to fall into submissive mode, leaving behind the eager but conflicted student mode I was in.

We didn't have any of his bondage gear at my father's place. He had yet to really bind me the way I saw in his photo album and for a moment, I wondered when he'd start. That was the bad submissive in me and so I tried to shut her up and let him take me where he wanted me to go.

He kissed me deeply and insistently, pulling my clothes off, and then his own, spreading my thighs and rubbing himself all over me. Despite all my conflicting feelings, the talk of various mock rape scenarios had me very wet and swollen and it took barely two minutes of him thrusting to bring on my first orgasm.