The Bottom Line (10 page)

Maggie didn’t think she could do that. She’s talk to him first. Hopefully their last chat had put an end to his hopes for a future with her. “I’ll think about it.”

“You should.” Christina put down her glass. “I don’t know about you two, but I’m exhausted. I have a client to take care of tomorrow and need my beauty sleep. I think I’ll head home.”

“I might go too,” Susan said. “Will you be okay if we leave you alone?”

A whoosh of relief almost floored Maggie. She’d wondered how she’d manage to get rid of her friends, even though shame filled her with every thought. Her need for Connor, for his touch and companionship, raged hotter than her self-reproach.

“Maggie? Will you be okay?”

With a start she returned to the conversation, castigating herself yet again for letting Connor sidetrack her thoughts. “Why shouldn’t I?”

“Wasn’t Greg coming over?”

“I told him you were here and were spending the night. I don’t think he’ll turn up because I was pretty sharp with him.”
Lies. All lies
. Could she dig herself a deeper trench?

Susan cocked her head. “Are you sure?”

She reminded Maggie of an inquisitive bird. “I’m sure. Besides, I want to handle Greg if necessary. I don’t want group participation.”

Christina pushed her glasses up her nose and grinned. “But group participation is so much fun.”

Maggie’s brows rose in surprise. She hadn’t misinterpreted Christina’s comment, had she? A faint tinge of color appeared on her friend’s cheeks. No, she hadn’t.
Interesting
. It seemed she wasn’t the only one harboring secrets.

Susan snorted. “You’d run a mile if a man suggested he bring along another party—either male or female—for a sexual fling.”

The color in Christina’s cheeks deepened, and Maggie thought she looked pissed now rather than amused.

“Not everyone follows a traditional path,” Christina snapped. “We all want different things, like Maggie with her spanking. It doesn’t make us weird, and don’t get me started on kinky. I hate the label
kinky
. Wanting personal fulfillment, no matter what form it takes, makes us human. And before you say it, I don’t mean non-consensual sex in any shape or form. That
is
sick. I’m talking about relationships in the normal sense. Dreams, hopes, aspirations—a person shouldn’t push them away, and that includes sexual things.” Her chest rose and fell with each rapid breath, her eyes sharp like a sergeant-major conducting drills and looking for mistakes.

The three women were silent for a long moment. Maggie wasn’t sure where to look until sympathy filled her in a crashing wave. If Christina wanted to move into untraditional sexual practices, that was fine with her. It wasn’t as if she was thinking along traditional lines. The Tight Five had supported her when she said she was into spanking. The least she could do was support Christina in turn.

“Good for you, Christina,” Maggie said, breaking the yawning silence. “Do you want to talk about it? Are we allowed to ask questions?”

Christina gave an uneasy laugh, picked up her glass and realized it was empty. Maggie noticed her hand shook when she replaced the stemware on the coffee table. “I think I’ve had too much wine. I didn’t intend to mention a thing.”

“You can’t leave us hanging like this,” Susan protested, her eyes glittering with curiosity.

“Yes,” Maggie said before Christina had a chance to answer. “She can. Christina knows we’re here if she wants to talk.”

“Thanks.” Christina stood and hugged Maggie, the pressure of her hands on Maggie’s shoulders telling of her gratitude. “I really need to go because I do have to work tomorrow.” She glanced at Susan. “Do you want to share a cab?”

“I need to do laundry and sort out a few other things before I visit my parents tomorrow.” A grimace slid across her face. “I promised I’d make a bacon and egg pie to take for lunch.” She wrapped Maggie in a hug. “It was fun watching your makeover. You look stunning. Our Christina does a great job.”

“She does,” Maggie agreed, infusing her voice with warmth. “I feel like a new woman. It’s like looking at a stranger in the mirror.”

Maggie walked her friends to the door and, with final hugs and kisses, they departed. After closing the door, she glanced at her watch. Just before nine. Connor had said to come over no matter how late her visitors left. A sliver of guilt slipped into her mind again, but she quashed it. Christina was right. She wanted to spend time with Connor. She wanted to explore spanking. Tonight, she’d tell him exactly what she wanted from their relationship. The worst thing that could happen was he’d say no.

Connor answered the door with a smile on his face.
Maggie
. He yanked open the door and gaped.

“Maggie?”

She smiled, a wide, bright grin that did nothing to hide her apprehension. “Who else were you expecting?”

“I don’t know—the Easter bunny?”
Holy hell, what had she done to herself?
She looked incredible. Amazing. Not that she hadn’t looked great before.

“Wrong time of year. Try again.”

“You look beautiful.” An understatement.

“Thanks. Christina and the others did a makeover today. My bank account is looking a bit sick, but other than that, I enjoyed myself.” She sashayed into his apartment, balancing on heels that put a dent in their seven-inch height difference. His gaze dropped to the gentle rock of her hips, the faint bounce of her ass, and lust roared through him.
Was she wearing a new outfit?
He couldn’t wait to see what she looked like under the coat.

“Would you like a drink?” he asked, not wanting to be rude and jump her straight away. His mother had brought him up right.

“No thanks. I’ve had enough wine tonight. If I have any more I’ll fall asleep.” She loosened the belt on her black and red coat until it dropped free and unfastened the buttons. “I wouldn’t want to waste
this
on sleep.”

Connor froze. His mouth dried of every trace of spit.

“Do you like?” she asked in a saucy tone, cocking one hip with sexy attitude.

“Hell, yeah,” he croaked, staring at the wee bit of nothing she wore “I think red is my new favorite color.” He prowled across the distance separating them and pushed the black and red coat off her shoulders. It fell down her arms and dropped to the floor with a whisper of crisp fabric.

She might as well have been naked because the lacey bra and panties she wore didn’t cover much. They were all enticement rather than functionality. He tucked a lock of her dark hair behind one ear, still trying to take in the transformation from Maggie to siren. He ran his hand over her collarbone and across her shoulder, his attention on her beautiful breasts. The red lace was translucent and he could see her nipples. As he touched and skimmed his hands across silky skin, her nipples hardened, pulling to tight crests that just begged him to kiss.

“Come to bed,” he said, his voice husky and full of desire.

She smiled. “I thought you’d never ask.”

He grabbed her hand, wanting to go slow despite the urgency thrumming through his veins. Even so, he couldn’t prevent a surge of impatience when he grabbed her, swinging her into his arms and striding for his bedroom. He tossed her on his bed, part of his mind thinking how right she looked there.
His
. He couldn’t muck this up between them. Not when it felt so damned right.

Connor followed her down to the bed and plundered her mouth, nipping. Tasting. Seducing.

“I want you so bad,” he muttered.

“So, what’s stopping you? Take me. I’m all yours.”

If only she really meant that.

He licked the sweetness of her mouth, pushed his tongue in at the corner of her lips until a choked, breathless sound came from her. His hands mapped her body, committing her to memory while he continued to make love to her mouth.

When he finally lifted his head, they were both breathing hard.

“This lingerie is more thought than covering,” he said, tugging on one of the shoulder straps.

“Yeah, great, isn’t it? It makes me feel sexy and feminine.”

“Newsflash, you are sexy and feminine, babe.”

“Prove it.” Her tone was a lazy invitation and it lit a match under his libido. The urgency took over and he removed the bra in seconds flat, latching onto a nipple and sucking hard. His cock started to throb and he ground his erection against her leg, groaning softly around her nipple at the resulting surge of pleasure.
So damned good
.

Maggie whimpered, and he would have stopped, but she grasped his head in her hands and arched into him. With his control at breaking point, he tried to go slow, but her silent encouragement urged him on.

He dragged down her panties, the sound of ripping of lace making him freeze. “Hell! I’m sorry. I’ll buy you some new ones.”

Maggie groaned. “I don’t care. I want you inside me.
Now
.” She struggled to kick the torn panties off her legs and puffed out an exasperated breath when she failed.

“Let me.” Connor grasped the flimsy material and ripped them right off. Maggie parted her legs and he moved over her, surging inside her with one quick thrust of his hips. Her snug walls gripped him.

Hot. Tight. So perfect.

Fire exploded in his groin, forcing him to move. Clenching his butt muscles, he plunged into her sex, sheer need driving him. He surged, retreated, stoking the pleasure that fired his body, his famous control history.

Maggie bucked and moaned beneath him, arching and taking every one of his hard thrusts. The slap of flesh against flesh filled the air along with the tart, spicy aroma of arousal.

Primitive hunger gripped him, and he couldn’t stop the plunge into pleasure. His balls lifted and suddenly his climax took him. He thrust hard then stilled, his heart hammering against hers as he gave into the firestorm in his body.

Connor came back to himself and realized he’d placed all his weight on Maggie. Cursing under his breath, he lifted onto his elbows. Then he realized a couple of other things. One, he’d just taken her like a Neanderthal without care for her pleasure and two, they hadn’t used a condom.

Chapter Seven

“I didn’t use a condom,” Connor blurted.

“You also came before I did,” Maggie said, her heart still thudding from the experience. She didn’t even care she hadn’t come. A small problem. Connor would take care of that soon.

“Did you hear me?”

“Of course I heard you,” Maggie said. “Don’t worry. I’m not at the right time in my cycle, but to set your mind at rest I’ll go to the doctor tomorrow and get the morning after pill.” Maggie felt a pang saying the words, but she knew it was the right thing to do. While she wanted children in the future, it wasn’t right to have a child to hook a man. And besides, she couldn’t exactly explore spanking while pregnant. That sounded plain wrong.

“I’m sorry.” Connor’s voice was hoarse. His eyes held remorse, and Maggie knew he was being too hard on himself. She shared the blame.

“Hey, there are two of us in this bed. I didn’t notice the lack of condom until you said something. It will be all right, and to make sure I’ll ask the doctor for a prescription for birth control. Okay?”

Connor dipped his head and kissed her hard, pouring apology and passion into the kiss. She felt it clearly.

“I really am sorry. I didn’t mean to manhandle you like that. I’ve never treated a woman like that before. I don’t know what came over me.”

Maggie frowned. Manhandled? He’d ripped her panties and taken rather than coaxed. So what? She hadn’t felt in danger or scared at any time. In fact, she’d enjoyed every moment of their lovemaking.

“What are you talking about?” She pushed at his shoulders so she could see his face. “Explain.”

“I was rough with you.”

“You didn’t hurt me. I like that you felt you could let go with me. I won’t break, you know. Besides, I have a mouth. If you ever do something I don’t like, I’ll tell you.”

Connor blinked, a wealth of emotions passing through his blue eyes. Too quickly for her to decipher them. “You enjoyed it? Me being rough?”

Maggie’s mouth twitched. “Apart from not coming. That bit sucked.”

He seemed to hesitate before the tension seeped from his shoulders. “I can fix that.”

“You should get right on it then,” Maggie said, allowing her teasing to rush free in a sassy grin. “I’m all agog to see how you’re going to do it.”

“Agog?”

“Yeah, it means eager and impatient.”

Connor groaned. “I know what it means.”

Her brows rose. “So?”

He snorted, shook his head once and pressed a swift kiss to her lips. “Don’t talk. I need to concentrate.”

“It’s true then. Men really can’t multitask?”

“That’s a myth put out by women.”

“Prove it.”

“I can’t talk and use my mouth on you at the same time.”

Maggie suppressed a giggle and shook her head in a mournful manner. “All talk and no action.”

A snort escaped him. “Someone should have spanked you when you were younger.”

“Ah, but they didn’t, which is why I need it now.” She waited, taut with excitement, for his reply. It was the closest they’d come to a discussion about her sexual needs. Would he take the hint?

His brow furrowed then he moved down the bed. “We’ll see if you’re singing a different tune after I’m finished.”

“Promises, promises,” she taunted even though frustration roared through her. Why couldn’t she articulate exactly what she wanted? Where the heck were her big girl panties?

The touch of his mouth sent every thought flying from her head, the slow laps of tongue firing lust to life. Damn, he was good at that. He found all her sensitive spots until heat and pleasure curled through her. A whimper escaped, one she couldn’t contain. A flush of heat crept up her body, and she sucked in a hoarse breath.

“That feels good, Connor. Don’t stop. Please don’t stop.”

He laughed, the sound a puff of heat against her sensitive flesh. His lick across her clit pushed her over the edge. She convulsed against his lips, her pussy fluttering in orgasm.

“Connor,” she cried, almost sobbing because he made her feel so good.

When he lifted his head, his stubble rasped against the delicate skin of her inner thighs. He moved up the bed and kissed her. She sank into the kiss, tasting her juices on his lips. Murmuring softly, she wrapped her arms around his neck and held tight.

Connor rolled away, settling her comfortably at his side when she protested.

“Where did you grow up?” he asked.

“In Wellington. Why?”

“I realized I didn’t know much about you.”

“It’s not as if it’s a secret.” Her voice held a note of caution, the same caution she always experienced when discussing her family. It wasn’t as if she could come out and say,
Oh, you know Elle Walker, the aging socialite who’s always in the gossip columns? That’s my mother. Oh, yeah and after one dumb mistake in my late teens my father is still convinced I’m exactly like her and will screw up again.

When she thought about it, she didn’t know much about Connor either. He was right. Whenever they were with the others, they talked about work, about the present, about rugby. They didn’t get into personal things.

“How did you end up in Auckland?”

“My parents divorced when I was five. My mother took me for a while but having a child didn’t work with her schedule and I went to live with my father. My mother had family in Auckland and moved up here. My father has three other children with his second wife.”

“And you get on okay with your stepsiblings?”

Maggie laughed. It was easy to laugh now, but her childhood hadn’t been easy. “Mostly. My stepmother is good for my father. They have a lot in common.”

“What about your mother?”

“She remarried as well. I don’t see her very much.” Maggie bit her lip, knowing she’d left huge gaps in her potted history. “Actually, to tell the truth my teenage years were difficult and it wasn’t an easy time for me or my father and his new family. We didn’t get on and I left as soon as I could. We get on better now with time and distance between us.” But he still managed to slip in a lecture each time they spoke or visited.

Connor stroked her upper arm before grasping her hip and pulling her into the cradle of his body. “My parents separated when I was four. My father used to hit my mother. He beat her so bad he put her in hospital a couple of times. When he started hitting me as well, she decided to get out of the marriage.”

“Oh, Connor. I’m so sorry.”

“It was a long time ago now. My mother remarried and my stepfather is a wonderful man. Frank’s been more of a father to me than my real father ever was.”

“That’s good.” Maggie didn’t say anything else. She couldn’t. No wonder he’d worried about being rough with her.

“Sometimes I worry I might take after my father.”

“No! Connor, no. You mustn’t think that.” Maggie pulled away enough to search his face. “I’ve known you for a couple of years now, and you’ve never shown a sign of violence. You are not your father.”

“Blood will out, according to my grandmother.”

“Your grandmother is a silly old woman,” Maggie said in a fierce tone, thinking at the same time the woman bore a resemblance to her father when it came to outspokenness. “You mustn’t believe her. You’re a good man, Connor Grey. I wouldn’t be here with you if I didn’t believe that.” Unsure if she had convinced him, she kissed him. Hard. It was a bruising kiss designed to make him pay attention. Once she was sure she had him, she softened the kiss, taking it into loving and seductive. When he groaned and his cock started to prod her thigh, she knew she had his full attention.

This time their lovemaking was slow. They dragged out every last sensation in no hurry to finish. Their breaths mingled and each soft, tormenting stroke created an empty ache in her womb. She ran her hands down his back and dug her fingers into the taut globes of his ass, silently encouraging him to move. They only parted for the length of time it took for Connor to don a condom before coming together again. Strained breathing and sighs gave way to pleasure, the coil of energy in her pussy exploding into a shattering climax only seconds before Connor came. They stayed clasped together for a long time while their breathing returned to normal.

Sleepy and content, Maggie let her mind drift. As usual her mind went straight to her blog and spanking. She thought about Connor and her promise to herself to strive for honesty. She even opened her mouth, ready to speak until another thought occurred. If Connor worried about turning violent like his father, how would he react when she asked him to spank her?

Sunday passed quickly. Maggie had expected Connor would leave her to visit the doctor on her own, but he insisted on going with her. After a quick stop at her place so she could grab clothes, they went to a walk-in clinic in a part of town they knew no one would see them and saw the doctor together. The doctor suggested they both take blood tests, so they did. They left armed with prescriptions and advice to use condoms until the birth control protection was viable.

That evening, alone in her flat, Maggie thought over the hours she’d spent with Connor. He made her feel cherished, and she knew without a doubt, he would never hit her. He’d never tread the same path as his natural father. Now all she had to do was convince Connor of something she knew was fact.

How do I approach my partner and ask him to spank me?

I’ve met a man I really like. The sex is great. More than great. And even better, we have a good relationship out of bed. I want to take our relationship to the next stage. How do I ask him to spank me when I know something in his background makes him abhor the whole idea of this sort of kink?

I really don’t know what to do now. It’s true I’ve had more time to think about spanking and the repercussions of adding it to my sex life. When I approach him, I know he’ll be both shocked and reluctant. But I also know myself. I won’t be happy until I try this. The more I read both online in blogs and forums and also in erotic romances featuring spanking, the more I want to explore this for myself.

I was ready to ask last night. I’ve decided honesty is something to strive for—a good thing, I think. Anyway, I opened my mouth to state my desires and he started talking, asking questions about my childhood. I didn’t mind answering. Like many New Zealand children, I come from a broken home where both my parents remarried and I was plunged into a blended family. Some of you are probably nodding because you’re in the same situation. But what do you do where your partner comes from a violent background? What do you do if he’s worried about turning into the same violent monster his father was? How do I get him to come to terms with the fact that if I give him permission to spank me, he’s not dropping into the same dark pit that haunted his father?

I’ve tried patience. I really have. Some of you might say I should forget this and grasp the happiness I’ve found already. I can’t do that because that would be allowing myself to settle.

I don’t know what to do, how to approach this problem. My mind is going in circles, and I’m starting to get frustrated. I don’t want a stranger to spank me. I know I could do that—pay to have someone spank me—but I know in my heart that it wouldn’t work. I want love and laughter along with my spanking. I want rich fantasies and silly role-playing. I don’t want to settle for second best.

If you have any advice for me, I’d love to hear it. How did you introduce spanking to your relationship? Did it happen by accident or was it a planned thing introduced to bring spiciness to your relationship?

Connor read the post with growing alarm. His heart thumped so fast it felt as if he’d run a hundred meter sprint. He wanted Maggie, not just for now, but for the future. They were good together. A curse slipped free.

Why the hell had she picked up that bloody book?

With a glance at his watch, he grabbed his car keys and slammed from his apartment to do what he’d been putting off. He’d hoped Maggie would let go of this spanking idea. But no, she continued to blog on a regular basis and had attracted quite a following. A sensation he identified as jealousy clutched his chest, squeezing so tight it felt as if someone had applied a vise, clamping it shut around his ribs.

He didn’t know a lot about his mother’s first marriage, mainly because he’d been a child when it happened and she’d protected him from the worst of the violence. But right now, he needed answers. He needed to reconcile his love for Maggie with her desire for spanking. And he needed to do it quickly, before he lost her to another man.

Half an hour later, he knocked on his mother’s door before opening it and shouting a greeting. Two cars sat in the driveway, so he knew they were at home. He’d been so wound up he hadn’t thought to call ahead.

His mother appeared from the lounge. “Connor, what are you doing here?”

Frank appeared beside her and wrapped an arm around her waist. “What your mother means is that we’re pleased to see you.”

He exchanged a grin with Frank. “Aren’t I allowed to pop in to see you whenever I feel like it?”

“Of course you are,” his mother said. “We were about to have a barbeque. Can you stay? You are still coming for my birthday?”

“I’d love to have dinner, and I wouldn’t dare miss your birthday,” Connor said. “Although isn’t it a bit cold for a barbeque? It looked like rain when I was driving up here.” The crash of thunder punctuated his words and rain rattled the windows with enough force to make them all look outside.

“You brought that rain with you.” The twinkle in his mother’s eyes belied the stern words.

Connor grinned again, pleased he’d come, despite the circumstances that brought him. “Don’t you ever listen to the weather forecasts?” Although he’d thought about inviting Maggie and maybe the others for his mother’s birthday, he’d changed his mind. It would be like making a statement of intent, and he didn’t want to do that, not publically at least.

“I look out the window,” his mother retorted. “I make the right forecast most of the time.”

“What can I get you to drink?” Frank asked. “Gabby and I are drinking wine, but we have beer if you’d prefer.”