The Best for Last (8 page)

He broke the kiss and began walking her back toward the restaurant. “Let's go to my place.”

His place in Mexico Beach was over an hour away. Kitty couldn't wait that long.

“No, let's do it here.” She began pulling him toward the sandy area below a deserted pier. He hesitated a moment, then followed her lead.

“Are you sure?” His voice sounded rough, like he was excited by the idea.

Impulsively, she reached out and palmed the front of his trousers, causing him to suck in a breath.
Oh, yeah
. He was definitely excited, all right. “I'm positive. I'm thirty-six years old and I've never made love on the beach. It's my birthday, so you have to do what I want.”

He yanked off his jacket, threw it down on the sand, and then lowered them both onto it. His mouth settled in the sensitive area just below her earlobes with the outrageously expensive earrings, and began placing little kisses there.

“Steve,” she panted.

He slid his big hand up until her black dress bunched around her waist. Then, using the tips of his fingers, he lightly drew a pattern on the skin of her inner thighs. It took him forever but he finally reached the edge of her panties. He palmed her through the thin silk crotch, making her hips buck off the jacket. Then he slipped off her panties and used his broad shoulders to spread her legs apart.

And that's when she realized he was going to go down on her. Right here on the beach. She should be mortified. Instead, she now understood why he found the idea so exciting. Technically, they were obscured from view by the pier, but anyone could come along at any moment and see them. Or hear them. Because they were definitely
not
being quiet. At least, she wasn't being quiet. He, on the other hand, had his mouth occupied at the moment.

He swirled his tongue, slow and lazy in all the places she liked best, until she couldn't stand it anymore. Her hips began a herky-jerky, frantic kind of motion. “Damn it, Steve, just do it,” she ground out.

He laughed against her thigh, but he brought his hands under her bottom and raised her straight up to meet his mouth, flicking his tongue hard and fast against her clit until she collapsed in a heap of liquid bones back onto the jacket.

He unzipped his fly, pulled out his cock, and guided himself inside her. She wrapped her legs around his waist and let her body adjust to him. They'd made love hundreds of times by now, but every time it felt different. Better. How could that be? Was it the same for him? Or was she the only one that felt that way? “That…it feels…”

“Fucking perfect,” he moaned.

“Yes,” she squeaked.

He began pumping into her, his rhythm slow at first, just like his mouth had been earlier. His hands cupped her breasts through the material of her dress and she wished now that they'd taken the time to take off their clothes, but it was too late for that. She used her hips to subtly encourage him to increase his tempo, and just like that, he did.

Bracing his hands on the sand above her head so that he didn't crush her, he began pounding into her. It was rough, not like anything she'd experienced with him before. Her hands slid beneath his dress shirt to run frantically over the smooth muscles of his back. She couldn't stop touching him. Everything felt more intense. More powerful. This time, when she came she must have screamed because he covered her mouth to stifle it, his own low moan mingling with hers.

Afterward, they stayed together for a few minutes, trying to catch their breath. And then she began to laugh, because it's what she always did after sex. It was her body's natural response to orgasm. Call her weird. But she'd always done it.

“You are so sexy when you laugh like that,” he said, pulling out slowly.

“Yeah, well, I'm not sure either of us are going to be laughing when we stand up. I think we have sand in all the wrong places.”

He threw his head back and laughed, a natural, deep, rumbly kind of sound that made her want him all over again.

And then before she knew it, she blurted it out. “I love you.”

The second she said it, she knew it was the wrong thing to say. Gone was the comfortable camaraderie and after-sex glow of just a few seconds ago. Now the air was thick with an emotion she couldn't even name. She sat up and began brushing herself off, trying to put her clothing back in place. But her hands were shaking.
Oh God
. She'd said it. And he hadn't said it back. It was worse than her worst nightmare. It was the end of the world.

“I didn't mean it like that,” she said quickly.

“Kitty, I… Do you have any idea how much I like you?”

He
liked
her?

How was she supposed to respond to that? Other than knocking him upside the head.

He stood and adjusted his trousers then gave her a hand up. “Let's go back to my place. We need to talk.”

“Your place?” He'd used that term before and while technically, it was true, it sounded as if they weren't together anymore. “Are you moving out permanently?” she asked him.

“What?” He looked confused. “You know why I'm at the Mexico Beach house.”

“I thought I did, but it feels like maybe you're relieved that we're spending some time apart. Maybe we
should
spend some time apart.” She couldn't be with him anymore. Not if he didn't love her. It had been different before, but now that she'd exposed their relationship, it could never be the same again.

What had she done?

His cell phone rang. He ignored it.

“Aren't you going to get that? It's after ten at night, it must be important. Maybe it's the limo driver. Isn't he coming back to pick you up?”
Keep talking. Keep moving. Keep…doing something
.

He fished the phone out of his trouser pocket, looked at the screen, and then he must have pushed the decline button because the ringing immediately stopped.

“Who was that?” she demanded.

“No one,” he said in the same tone of voice he'd used when he told her he couldn't get cell phone service near the construction site. It had sounded like a lie then, and it sounded like one now, too.

Never in the year that they'd been together had she suspected him of being anything but honest and truthful with her. But the fact that he didn't want her to know who'd called…

Anger, hot and pure, surged through her. He didn't have to love her. But
damn it
, she wasn't going to allow him to
lie
to her. She had too much pride for that. She placed her palm up in the air. “Let me see your phone, Steve.”

“It's not what you're thinking.”

She didn't say anything. She just kept her hand out, waiting.

He reluctantly handed it over.

There was a missed call from someone named Joanna.

This was…
no
. Never in a million years would Steve cheat on her. He might not love her. And he'd definitely lied to her. But he wouldn't cheat on her. Somehow, she knew that. The same way she knew the sun would come up tomorrow morning. To think otherwise was to be wrong.

“Who is she, Steve?”

“No one important. You have to trust me on this.”

“If she's no one important, then tell me who she is.”

“I'll tell you everything. But not here. Let's go back to my place,” he pleaded.

There was a time in a woman's life when she had a choice to make. She could buckle down and scream and rant and make a scene or she could walk away with her head held high. Or…she could jump in the ocean and swim far, far away. Choices one and three were tempting. But neither one felt right to her.

They walked back to The Harbor House in silence. In less than twelve hours, she was supposed to stand by her father's side on what would hopefully be the happiest day of his life. How was she supposed to do that when her own life was falling apart right in front of her?

She couldn't do this tonight. She just couldn't.

“I don't think it's a good idea to talk right now. Can we do it tomorrow? After dad's wedding?”
When I can fall apart in private with no one to see me?

He looked like he was going to be sick.

She knew the feeling.

“If that's what you want. The limo will take you home. I'll…wait here for it to come back and get me.”

She nodded.

“Kitty,” he said, his voice cracking with emotion. “Please. Say something.”

“Why do I feel like we just had good-bye sex?” she whispered.

“Are you
crazy
? This isn't good-bye anything,” he said gruffly. “Listen, baby, you
know
me. Don't you?”

The limo circled to the front of the parking lot and one of the restaurant's valets came forward to open the door for her. She wished she could say something, but her throat felt too tight to allow her to speak. So she got inside the limo before he could see her cry.

#

Steve took one of the empty stools at The Harbor House bar and waved the bartender over. “I'll have a Scotch. Neat.” He had just put in a call to the limo driver requesting that he come back to pick him up in an hour. Maybe if he got drunk enough he could forget the look on Kitty's face tonight when she'd said good-bye.

What the hell was wrong with him? Why was it so hard for him to give her the words she needed to hear? He thought he'd have more time, but now there was no choice. He'd have to do it tomorrow. He'd have to lay it all on the line or lose her forever.

But what if what he had to say wasn't enough for her? What then? The sick feeling in his chest came back again. He'd thought those times before that it was indigestion, but now he knew what it really was. The heavy acidic burning was his own body telling him what an idiot he was. There wasn't enough Maalox in the world to cure the mess he'd made of his own love life.

The bartender handed him his drink and went off to take another order.

“Hey, boss.” Steve glanced up to see Tom Donalan take the stool next to him. “Mind if I join you?”

Steve shrugged. “Sure, why not?” He took a long slow sip of the Scotch. “What are you doing here?”

“I was having dinner with my ex and her family. I was just about to leave when I saw you.” He hesitated. “It looked like you could use a friend.”

“It's that obvious?” Steve signaled the bartender back. “Get this man whatever he wants on me.”

Donalan quietly ordered a beer.

“Dinner with your ex, huh?” Steve said. “You must be pretty evolved.”

“You could say that. We have a son, and we were lucky enough to stay friends.”

“Ah. Well, good for you.”

“It works.” The beer came and Donalan took a sip. “So what brings you here tonight?”

“Rehearsal dinner for my…for Kitty's father and his bride to be.”

“Yeah, I heard my old man is doing the service tomorrow.”

Steve nodded.

Donalan took a couple more sips of the beer, then pushed it away. “I should probably get going.” He went to get up from his stool.

“You ever been in love?” Steve asked. It was impulsive. And stupid. Because he really didn't care what Donalan had to say. Did he?

“Once. A long time ago.”

“But love didn't save your marriage.”

“I never said it was it was my ex I'd been in love with.”

Steve glanced up. “Ah. Hence the reason your marriage fell apart.” Funny. He hadn't pegged Donalan for a cheater.

“You got it all wrong.” Donalan reached back for the beer and this time, he drained it. “Doesn't matter. I messed up. I haven't seen her in over ten years. But…” He shrugged. “I still think of her sometimes. What might have been. You know.”

“The proverbial one that got away, huh?”

“You could say that.” Donalan shifted around in his stool. “Hey, I'm just an asshole who didn't know a good thing when he saw it way back when. But I like to think that now that I'm older, if I ever have the chance to make it right… I don't know. I just hope that I'd take a chance this time. You know?” He got up and slapped Steve on the back. “Thanks for the beer, boss.”

CHAPTER EIGHT

K
itty peered out the vestibule. The Whispering Bay Methodist Church was small enough that the few dozen people waiting for the ceremony to begin made the place feel cozy. White gardenias overflowed along the tops of the aisles and a violinist played classical music in the background. Today was her father's wedding day! She still had to pinch herself to believe that it was happening. And to keep herself awake.

She'd had trouble sleeping after the way she and Steve had left things last night. Sometime around three in the morning, she'd finally drifted off but then she'd woken back up before five. Pilar had come over to the house to help her get ready and had slathered the area under her eyes with hemorrhoid cream. She claimed it would get rid of the bags but Kitty wasn't so sure. Her hair and makeup looked well enough, she supposed, but even she had seen the sadness on her own face. Too bad there wasn't a cream to take care of the man you loved telling you that he
liked
you a lot.

She mentally chided herself. Today wasn't about
her
. It was about her dad and Sharon and she was genuinely happy for them. Once the shock of their engagement had worn off, Kitty had taken the time to get to know Sharon and she was every bit as lovely as she seemed. So were Mallory and Ginny. And despite last night's toast debacle, Frank and Greg were okay, too. Once you got them away from one another.

Shea caught her eye and waved to her. Her husband, Moose, was sitting next to her in the pew. Pilar and Nick and Frida and Ed and the rest of the Bunco Babes and their spouses were present, as well as a healthy contingency from the Gray Flamingos. Betty Jean Collins wore a silver dress and sat in the second row and seemed awfully preoccupied by…

Kitty turned to see what Betty Jean was so interested in. She should have known it would be Steve walking down the aisle. Wearing a dark suit with a light-colored shirt and the red tie she'd given him for his birthday, he looked exactly the way she'd envisioned him whenever she dreamed of their own wedding.

A lump settled in her throat, threatening to squeeze her airway.

They were supposed to talk this afternoon after the wedding. But what would they say to one another?

Steve looked at her, but his expression was solemn. He broke their gaze, scanning the pews, looking for a row to sit in.

“Yoo-hoo!” Betty Jean cried, not bothering to lower her voice despite the fact that they were in a church. “Sit here, handsome!”

No one else, not Shea or Pilar or any of her other friends, offered to make room in their pews, so he reluctantly took the seat next to Betty Jean, who looked absolutely thrilled.

Steve glanced her way again and this time they both couldn't help but smile. Just a little. And in that moment they were completely in sync, as though they were sharing a private joke, and it was as if the past week had never happened.

She could feel her eyes begin to well up. She ducked back in the vestibule.

“Kitten!”

She jumped, startled to see her dad walking toward her. He'd gone off to speak to Reverend Donalan about the vows, but now it was just the two of them, waiting for their cue to take their places at the front of the church.

“All you crying?” he asked with concern. He took a handkerchief from the breast pocket of his jacket and offered it to her.

“I'm just so happy for you, Daddy.” She carefully blotted her cheeks so that she didn't mess up her makeup (or smear off the hemorrhoid cream beneath it, because who knew how puffy those bags would be without it?). Mallory had done everyone's faces this morning while Frank had made pancakes and Ginny and Greg had squeezed a whole bag of oranges to make the fresh juice for their mimosas. It had been a lovely wedding breakfast, except that no one had mentioned Steve's absence. It seemed as if the entire family had written him off already.

“I'm so nervous,” Dad admitted. “You'd think I was a kid.”

Kitty smiled and straightened his tie for him. “You look very handsome. Sharon is going to swoon when she comes down the aisle and gets a look at you.”

He grew somber. “You look beautiful today, Kitten.” For a second there, Kitty thought he was going to cry. But then he coughed to cover up the emotion behind the moment. He reached into his pocket once again and handed her a piece of paper. “I know this is a last minute thing, but Sharon and I would like you to read this during the ceremony.”

Kitty quickly scanned the sheet in her hands. “It's a scripture reading?”

“St. Paul to the Corinthians. You've heard it before I'm sure. Very popular at weddings,” he added with a wink.

“I'd be happy to. Let me just read this over a couple of times so I don't flub it up.”

She went off into the corner of the room and read the scripture. Once quickly to make sure there weren't any unfamiliar words, then again slowly to get the rhythm of the piece. Dad was right, she'd heard this countless times before. It was a beautiful piece and she was honored that they'd asked her to read it.

Love is patient, love is kind. It is not jealous
…

It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things
.

Love never fails
.

She read it again. And then again.

The words seemed to clang through her brain. Over and over until she could feel those blasted tears again and the sound of Steve's voice saying, “
Listen, baby, you know me. Don't you
?”

He
had
to love her. Didn't he? She felt it more strongly than anything she'd felt before. Just because he hadn't said it last night didn't mean it wasn't true. Maybe he didn't even know it himself. How could a man who'd spent the past week trying to make her father's wedding day the most special day it could be not love her?

The only time she'd ever doubted it was when someone else had planted an insecurity. Not because they were being cruel or mean but because they loved her, and they didn't know him. Not like she did.

“
Baby, you know me. Don't you
?”

Yes. She knew him. And she loved him. Maybe it was as simple as that.

“Daddy, can you excuse me for a second?”

He glanced at his watch. “We're supposed to be out there in a few minutes.”

“That's all this will take.” She opened the door that led into the church and slipped off to the side aisle. Immediately, Shea and Pilar and rest of the church craned their heads in curiosity.

Let them watch
, she thought.

She caught Steve's attention and waved him over to the area behind the violinist.

Steve took her by the arm further away from the crowd's view. “What's wrong? Are the flowers not okay? Or is it the music? I can—”

“I love you,” she blurted again for the second time in the past twelve hours. Only this time when she said it, it felt nothing but right.

“I just wanted you to know that. I love you, Steve. And I don't care who Joanna is, because she's probably someone you work with or maybe she's involved in the sale of the house, or whatever. I don't know and I don't care. But you're right. I know
you
and that's all that matters.”

He looked as if it was the last thing he'd expected her to say. “Kitty—”

“
Kitty
!” her father hissed from the vestibule. “It's time!”

Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Reverend Donalan standing at the front of the church, waving her over. She couldn't wipe the grin from her face. It was so freeing. Telling Steve after all this time the way she felt. No matter what happened between them, she would never regret saying it.

She reached up to peck him on the cheek. “I'll see you later.” Then she hurried to take her place next to her father.

The violinist began playing Pachelbel's Canon, and a few seconds later Mallory and Ginny came walking down the aisle together in matching knee-length peach chiffon dresses. They looked almost as emotional as their mother, who looked both ready to laugh and cry at the same time. Sharon wore an ivory-colored, tea-length satin dress and looked like something out of a bridal magazine. Kitty grabbed her father's hand and squeezed it. He squeezed it back, then turned to face his bride.

Reverend Donalan smiled at the congregation. “Friends, we are gathered together in the sight of God…”

#

His heart felt like one of those little silver balls in the pinball machine being pinged from side to side and lever to lever. Every couple of seconds it would soar, then fall, only to be bounced around, never quite coming back down.

Kitty loved him.

She'd said it last night, but not the way she'd said it just now. Clear and strong with no doubt whatsoever. Despite the fact he hadn't said it back. Despite the fact that a strange woman had called him in the middle of the night and he'd refused to tell her who she was.

Looking beautifully serene in a light blue dress that highlighted the auburn in her hair, she stood proudly next to her father, occasionally nudging him in the side when he was too stunned from the solemnity of the event to remember his next lines. It was a poignant moment, seeing her support her father on the day of his wedding.

He'd never met anyone like her before.

He'd never meet anyone like her again.

A small trickle of sweat ran down the back of his dress shirt. She'd promised that they'd talk later today. But after the ceremony, there would be pictures. Then a small reception back at the house, filled with Sharon's family and Kitty's friends and… He couldn't wait. He simply couldn't. He had to talk to her before then.

“And so,” the minister continued, “If anyone here knows of any reason why this man and this woman should not be joined in holy matrimony, let him speak now or forever hold his peace.”

The crowd politely chuckled.

He should do it now. He should interrupt the ceremony and tell Kitty what he had to say, but then she might kill him for ruining her father's wedding. The sweat began to drip down his back.

“No objections? Let's proceed then,” Reverend Donalan said.

Sharon recited some vows she'd written and the daughters started weeping again. And then Alan spoke his own vows and the weeping became contagious.

“Good Lord!” Betty Jean whispered in his ear. “You'd think we were at a funeral!”

Kitty went up to a mic and did a reading. It all began to blur for him. And before he knew it, the minister had pronounced them husband and wife and Alan and Sharon kissed and the music started up again. They walked down the aisle holding hands and smiling like their hearts were going to explode.

Steve knew the feeling.

He had to talk to her now. He didn't want another second to go by with her, and the rest of their world, not knowing exactly the way he felt about her.

And he'd thought therapy was going to be painful
.

He stood. “May I have your attention everyone?”

Alan and Sharon halted halfway down the aisle and the violinist froze.

Betty Jean grabbed his coat jacket. “What are you doing?” she hissed.

The entire church turned to look at him.

“I want to say something. To Kitty.”

Her brown eyes went wide. “To me?”

He nodded. “It's important that you know who Joanna is.”

“
Now
?”

“Yes, right now.”

“Who's Joanna?” Betty Jean demanded. “I thought you were going to call my niece, Natalie!”

Kitty rolled her eyes. “For the love of… Betty Jean Collins, I've put up with you flirting with my boyfriend for the past year now, but enough is enough. No more sly innuendoes and double entendres and slipping him phone numbers behind my back. Got it?”

The crowd appeared stunned by her outburst.

That's my girl
, he thought proudly.

“Well!” Betty Jean huffed. “I…well, dang! What am I supposed to do for fun now?”

“I don't know and frankly, I don't care,” Kitty said.

Betty Jean's jaw dropped.

Alan Burke caught his eye with a stern fatherly glare. “If you have something to say to my daughter, then say it. Because we all want to hear it.” Beside him, Sharon nodded enthusiastically.

“That's right!” Pilar shouted. “Go on! We all have a vested interest here.”

“Right.” He turned to face Kitty. “You want to know who Joanna is? I'll tell you who she is. She's my therapist.”

Everyone stared at him. Not that they hadn't been staring at him ever since he'd stood, but now they looked at him in complete confusion.

“Your therapist?” Kitty said. “I don't understand. Did you hurt your back or something?”

“I'm seeing an excellent therapist for my busted knee,” Reverend Donalan chimed in. “But her name isn't Joanna.”

“She's not a physical therapist. She's more like a…shrink. I went to see her for you. For us.”

Kitty blinked. Then she blinked again. “You're seeing a therapist. For
me
?”

He nodded.

“But why?”

“Because I don't want to mess this relationship up. Because I want to…” He shoved a hand through his hair. “Because I want to be able to express my feelings when I'm around you.”

“
Oh my God
…” She took a few steps toward him. “That's…that's the most romantic thing anyone's ever done for me!”

“Are you kidding?” he said hoarsely. “Kit, don't you know I'd do anything for you? For us? When I told you last night that I liked you, I…you completely misunderstood. I've never
liked
any of my exes. Love is a word that… I've never been one of those guys who feels comfortable talking about his emotions. I thought you knew how I felt about you but I realize now you need me to say it. So this is me saying it. For everyone to hear. I
love
you. More than I've ever loved anyone or anything. You're it for me, Kitty. There's never going to be anyone for me but you. I've tried so hard not to screw this up between us and maybe…maybe that's exactly what I've done anyway.”