The Beast of Beauty (6 page)

The book was as
much a mystery the second time as the first. It took me a while to find the
spell that had changed me, and it was more than halfway through the book. I
felt discouraged, for I had hoped that I wouldn’t have to read much in order to
understand the spell. Now it seemed as if I would have to read the entire book
in order to figure out what on earth was going on.

Each page held
something quite different. It wasn’t long before I realized that the book read
like a diary. I would read a little while about what was going on in, what I
guessed, was Amara’s life, and then there would be random spells throughout it.

I was still
blown away by the fact that the book didn’t have an author or a copyright page.

“Maybe it WAS a
diary,” I whispered, “And someone got hold of it, typed it up, and had it bound
like a book so that it would last.”

I looked at
Daniel to make sure that I hadn’t woken him up, but he slept soundly.

It all made
perfect sense. This book certainly didn’t read like a novel, and it hadn’t
actually been published.

I felt better as
I had solved another part of the mystery, but there was too much still hidden
to feel completely victorious. I still had no idea why it was in our school.

My blood ran
cold as I realized another option of what could have happened; Mrs. Stacy may
not have been the one who handed me the wrong book.

Jasper had taken
my book from me.

I shook my head.
He only had the book for a second; there was no way that he could have switched
books without my noticing.

Then again, he
wasn’t afraid of me when he saw me, even though he was drunk.

My speculations
made my head hurt, and I hadn’t even begun to figure out what had happened to
me.

I read and read
in the book while Daniel slept. Nothing that I read had anything to do with a
beast. There were remedies for sicknesses, spells to keep loved ones safe,
enchantments for good harvests, and a plethora of other things that did not
apply to me at all. I barely skimmed over them, eager to find a way to undo
this curse.

Then, the book
took a strange turn. The words Amara had written began taking on a darker
quality.

The people in
this town are going to pay for what they did to my sister. I will find a way. I
have looked through all of the old books trying to find a proper punishment.
She did not deserve to die the way that she did. They are after me now, but
they will not catch me doing magic until it’s too late.

Thomas won’t
speak to me anymore. The people have convinced him that I am evil, and he won’t
even listen to me try to explain. I don’t know what to do, but believe me, I
will figure it out.

I frowned.
Skimming back a couple pages, I read more in-depth about her sister, Mary.

Mary is
completely losing her mind with grief. We had no idea that any spell could have
consequences that dire. She didn’t mean to hurt anyone, but no one believes
her, for they are just as grief-stricken as she. Several have asked us to find
a way to undo the spell, but there is no way.

I began to
panic. I had no idea what spell she was talking about, but the fact that she
said there was no way to undo a spell made me anxious. I feared that there was
no way to undo any spell.

I flipped back
to where I had been when Amara said that Mary had died. There were only three
pages between that story and the spell that had changed me. Amara must have
changed herself into a beast in order to savagely fulfill her revenge on their
town.

Sure enough, the
following pages were filled with the bloodshed of those who had wronged her. I
sat frozen, unable to move anything besides my eyes across the page and
occasionally my fingers in order to turn the pages. I was amazed at all of the
harm that she could bring because it was all of the harm that I could bring. In
light of all that I went through every day, it should have made me feel better,
or at least safer. It didn’t. It made me feel like a time-bomb that could
explode and take out a million people without a moment’s notice. I felt like I
was a major threat to the whole world, and I didn’t want to be. I didn’t want
to be rid of the bad guys in my life by becoming one. That wasn’t ever who I
was, and it definitely wasn’t ever who my mother wanted me to be. 

I slammed the
book and put it down. I needed to breathe before I could go any further, no
matter how badly I wanted to know the ending of my own story.

But I couldn’t.
I couldn’t breathe, not even for a moment.

I grabbed the
book again and hastily turned to the last page I had been on. The townspeople
had all been killed at this point, or at least the ones who had upset her.

I began to treat
the book like the greatest page-turner that I had read in years. I read
intently, without skimming, until I came upon the very last entry.

I had to take
Thomas against his will. He won’t look at me in the same way that he used to,
he looks at me like I am a monster that he has to overcome. I have the spell in
my hand and I read it aloud every day, but it doesn’t work. I remain an animal.
It took several days, but I finally got Thomas to read the spell as well, but I
still have not changed back. I have no coven, no one to ask how to make this
work or what I am doing wrong. Maybe this is my punishment from God for being
what I am—a monster. Not because I look like one, but because I have behaved
like one.

I am more than
what one sees

Bring me
patience, kindness, and peace

The spell is so
simple, but it is so complicated. How am I supposed to uncover the riddle of my
failure?

I sat upright
and took in a deep breath, “I am more than what one sees. Bring me patience,
kindness, and peace.”

Daniel turned
over and jerked when he saw me. I was still the beast.

The pain wasn’t as terrible when
I woke up. I had heard that elevating your injuries made them feel less
painful, but I was surprised at the truth that it held.

“I’m sorry,” I mumbled, barely
awake, “I didn’t mean to jump; I just thought that you had gone out. It wasn’t
because you’re a…”

Her expression never changed,
giving me no hint as to how that I was allowed to describe what she was.

“I’m a what?” she asked
innocently.

I sighed, “I honestly don’t
know.”

We sat in silence for a few
seconds, not knowing what to say to one another. I didn’t want to anger her
because I had no idea what she was capable of; I didn’t want to hurt her
feelings because I didn’t want to see the pain in her eyes.

I was afraid of her hurting me,
and I was afraid of hurting her.

She finally shrugged, “Don’t worry
about it.”

“What were your parents like?” I
asked.

Her face crinkled up, “What do
you mean? They were normal people.”

“But you were born like this?”

She shook her head no.

I was stunned. She had never said
that she was born the way she is now, but I had somehow just jumped to that
conclusion.

“So…” I said expectantly.

“So what?” she asked, seemingly
annoyed.

I sighed, “So what happened?”

“You wouldn’t believe it if I
told you,” she said. “Now, to change the subject, I went out and gathered us
some food and water!”

She pointed to two five-gallon
buckets, one filled with a rose-topped salad and the other with slightly murky
water. I was a little disappointed, but she seemed so proud of herself that I
made myself smile.

“Wow! That’s so nice of you!” I
said, trying to seem as excited as she was. “What’s the rose for?”

“Oh, I just thought it was
pretty,” she said, taking it out of the bucket and sitting it on the
windowsill. “I suppose it won’t live very long since I don’t have a vase to
hold the water in, but we can admire it for a little while.”

She jumped up off of her
mattress, got the water bucket, and set it down beside me.

“We don’t have anything resembling
cups,” she explained. “So you’ll just have to cup it in your hands to drink it.
Here, let me get you some clovers and dandelions too.” She got a couple of
handfuls from the grass bucket and laid them by my side. “Can I get you
anything else?”

I suddenly felt embarrassed, “Uh,
actually, I need to use the bathroom.”

Her eyes widened, “Oh, okay. Can
you put weight on either of your feet?”

I swung my legs over, touched the
ground with them, and then tested out each foot. They both rang out in
agonizing pain when I tried to put weight on them, and they were pulsing from
being underneath my heart.

“No,” I said, grimacing.

“Do you mind if I carry you?” she
asked hesitantly.

I shook my head no, but I
actually wasn’t sure.

She put one of her arms under my
knees, and I felt the bodily hair that she possessed for the first time. I was
shocked at how soft that it felt against my skin. She put her other arm under
my armpit and around my back and picked me up with ease. She carried me to the
bathroom and set me down on top of the ‘toilet’.

“Are you okay?” she asked.

“Yes,” I said, “Thank you.”

She nodded, “No problem, I’ll
wait outside the door.”

I was amazed at how she carried
me like I didn’t weigh anything at all. Her body type did not reflect the
amount of strength that she possessed. It made me more intrigued and more
afraid. It was a good thing that fear wasn’t overwhelming because I had no way
to escape on my own.

“Okay!” I yelled, and she came
and brought me back to my bed.

As soon as I propped my feet up
again, the pain began to slowly subside into the low hum that it was when I
awoke. I was wide awake for the time being, so I decided to try to make
conversation with her.

“So, Violet, do you have any
brothers or sisters?” I asked.

“No,” she said. “But I always
wished that I did. I feel like I would have been a lot less lonely.”

“I thought you wanted to be alone?”
I said. “After all, you’re out here in the middle of the woods all by
yourself.”

“I was afraid of myself,” she
said, lowering her head. “I was afraid that I would hurt other people, so I
took other people out of the equation.” She chuckled, “And then you showed up,
messing up my whole plan!”

I laughed, “Sorry!”

Her face changed, “By the way,
what were you doing out here?”

I sighed, replaying the events of
last night in my mind, “I got into a fight and got the crap kicked out of me by
a gang of idiots, I got into an argument with my parents, I snuck out of the
house to get some air and came up on a party where I heard my ex-best friends
and my ex-girlfriend making ‘plans’ for the night, and then it started pouring
down rain.”

She chuckled nervously, “Bad day,
huh?”

“You think?” I chuckled too. “But
oh well. My ankles will be better in a day or two, I’ll have to go face all of
those issues again, and that seems like the worst part at the moment.”

“I was wondering why you hadn’t
asked me to carry you back to town,” she said.

“Yeah, it’s because I’m not
looking forward to going back there, and I’m pretty sure that people would be a
little… taken aback if they saw you.”

“Oh yeah, that too,” she said
with a smile. “Now, eat your food! We have plenty, but if we do happen to run
out, I’ll go fetch us some more. It’ll take more of this than the normal amount
of food that you’re used to eating in order to make you full, so keep that in
mind when you’re eating.”

I looked down at the food that
she had gotten for me before my bathroom break. It was literally a bunch of
grass, the kind that I had stepped on for years and years without even
noticing. I closed my eyes and took a bite. My body relaxed with a sudden
relief, for it tasted exactly like grass smelled, and that’s not too bad as far
as I’m concerned.

She ate the grass with less fear
than I did, but she also seemed to be enjoying it less as well. She
closed-mouth smiled at me every once in a while as we ate, but other than that,
we chowed down on the grass without interaction.

As I ate, my mind kept reeling
with all of the information that I had learned from reading the book. I was
astonished at all of the horror that had played in my mind and terrified that I
could cause that much pain and grief.

All the while, I chewed on the
clovers and dandelions, wishing that I would have found a different plant that
would’ve been okay for us to eat. It was disgusting. I managed to keep on
chewing even though all I wanted to do was spit it out. It tasted like
something that you shouldn’t be allowed to eat, like plastic. I gagged once or
twice, but I tried to keep a straight face because Daniel seemed to be trying
his hardest to like it as well.

“It’s not bad,” he said when he
had finished eating. “I actually don’t feel hungry anymore.”

I smiled, but I dared not open my
mouth because I was sure that if I did, the clovers were going to work their
way back up my throat.

To make matters worse, I
definitely wasn’t getting filled up. I was only getting hungrier.

I looked up at Daniel, and to my
surprise, growled.

He looked startled, “What was
that for? I said it wasn’t bad.”

I sat in silence, embarrassed at
my behavior.

“Did I do something wrong?” he
asked.

I shook my head, “No, I’m sorry.
It’s just this whole beast thing. It must have been an instinct or something.”

He nodded, “Okay, but what would
it have been for? I didn’t even do anything.”

I sighed, “I’m just really
hungry, that’s all.”

“Well, eat some more grass. You
said that it would take more than normal to fill us up, right?”

“I can’t eat any more of it. It’s
disgusting,” I tried to explain.

“Aw, c’mon, it wasn’t that bad,”
he said. “Maybe you just got a bad handful or something. Maybe some animal peed
on it.”

I laughed, “I think I would’ve
been able to smell it if they had. That’s at least one perk to being like
this.”

“Then what is it? I was able to
eat it just fine. It wasn’t a steak, but it was edible,” he said.

My mind began to wander at the
idea of a steak. I had never had a rare steak before, but that sounded like
exactly what my body wanted. As soon as it was brought up in my mind, it was
like I couldn’t get it out. I closed my eyes in the bliss of dreaming of eating
a juicy steak, but when I opened them, all I saw was Daniel…

…and I couldn’t tell the
difference.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

I couldn’t take it anymore. I
bolted off of my mattress and went running out of the door. The sudden movement
made my stomach even queasier. There was a large tree nearby, so I held on to
it to steady myself as I threw up.

“Violet? Are you okay?!” I heard
Daniel scream out of the window.

“Yes,” I croaked back, “Just a
minute!”

I lowered myself to the ground,
careful not to sit in my own puke, and assessed the situation.

I couldn’t eat greens; that’s why
I threw up. I wanted to eat Daniel; the human part of me wanted to throw up
again.

“I should just tell him,” I
whispered.

I wanted to tell him so that he
would understand when I just needed to leave to get away from him, but I just
couldn’t. He had been so nice to me since I was a beast. I didn’t want to ruin
that by making him think that he needed to be afraid of me. It was almost
beginning to feel like old times with us.

The old times were gone, though.
There was nothing between us that could be salvaged, and definitely not while I
was a beast. I had to tell him who I was, how I was changed, and that because
of this change, I wanted to eat rare steaks.

I stood up, ready to go in and
face him.

He stared at me with concern when
I entered, “Are you okay? I heard you throwing up outside. You were right; you
probably shouldn’t eat more of the grass. I hope that I don’t get sick too,
seeing as you’d have to carry me so that I could throw up.”

I sighed, “Daniel, I have to tell
you something.”

His eyebrows went up, “What?”

“I… well… I think that I’m a
carnivore now instead of an omnivore,” I explained, kicking myself for not
telling him the other things that he needed to know.

He sat for a second processing
what I had said, “So… are you saying that you only want to eat meat, or that
you want to actually predatorily catch an animal and eat it without cooking
it?”

I whispered, “Both.”

His eyes grew wider, “Just
animals?”

I whispered even softer, “No.”

“Well, why is this the first I’m
hearing of this?” he said loudly, “I slept all through the night and most of
today here in your little house-cabin-shack thing, and the whole time you’ve
been wanting to eat me and I DIDN’T EVEN KNOW?”

“I’m sorry,” I said, “But let me
explain. I’m not going to eat you. If I was, I wouldn’t be telling you about
this. The only reason that I told you is that I need your help.”

“Okay… with what?” he asked, his
face finally relaxing.

“I’m going to catch an animal,
like a squirrel or rabbit or something, and then you can help me cook it, at
least a little bit so that I don’t feel so disgusting about it,” I said. “Would
you do that? I don’t know how to skin an animal or anything like that, so
that’s really what I need the most help with.”

His eyes narrowed, “You’ve never
done this before?”

“Of course not!” I said.

“You haven’t been… like this… for
very long, have you?” he said, seemingly proud of himself for putting this
together.

“No, I haven’t,” I said. “It just
happened yesterday. I had a pretty bad day yesterday too. Now, will you help me
or not?”

“Yes, I’ll be here ready to help
when you get back from your hunt,” he said cheerfully.

I laughed nervously, and headed
out the door to try to catch some small innocent creature that I could eat
without cooking it all of the way because that’s what my new stupid body
demanded.